


Lamees

by Zariva



Series: Lamees [1]
Category: Star Wars, Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Assault, Belting, Collars, D/s Power Dynamic, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, Extremely Dubious Consent, F/M, Force Choking (Star Wars), Forced Prostitution, Gen, Genetic Engineering, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Light BDSM, Mild Electrocution, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Not a Love Story, Oral Sex, Orgasm Denial, POV First Person, Pheromones, Referenced Sexual Violence, Self-Voyeurism, Semi-Public Sex, Sexual Assault, Sexual Slavery, Sexual Tension, Slavery, There is even a bit of plot, Vaginal Fingering, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-18
Updated: 2021-01-12
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:15:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 41
Words: 95,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24770698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zariva/pseuds/Zariva
Summary: General Hux is sent to negotiate with a despicable lowlife by the new Supreme Leader and is hating every minute of it. Lamees is a genetically engineered slave fascinated by the militant officers who have arrived on Iridan to negotiate with her master. Neither one of them quite grasps the impact a few callus words and a challenge will have on their lives.This story is set between TLJ and RoS.New Chapter!Chapter 41 Interlude 9: A few days after the events of Trapped, Hux comes to a decision.
Relationships: Armitage Hux/Original Female Character(s), Armitage Hux/Reader
Series: Lamees [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1913848
Comments: 155
Kudos: 231





	1. Prologue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux is getting ready to leave the _Finalizer_ for Iridan. Engell further sours his mood.

**The _Finalizer_**  
_34 ABY_

General Armitage Hux stood in the reception bay of the _Finalizer_ , grimly overlooking the preparations underway in the main hangar, where a command shuttle was being readied to carry him and his landing party down to Iridan. The warm, dry planet was a barely populated, little rock, lost between the Outer Rim and the Unknown Regions. A typical hiding spot for someone like the man Hux had been sent to find: Outside of the direct influence of the New Republic and its strangling laws. But not so far out of the way not to be a convenient stop for pirates, smugglers, and other riffraff. 

Coming here was precisely the kind of mission Hux despised. And therefore precisely the kind of mission the new Supreme Leader, Kylo Ren, had relished sending him on. What had once started as a derogatory quip—the idea to grow an army of clones rather than recruiting one from the children of subjugated planets—had taken root inside Ren's mind. Only, the idea of simply taking one genetic code and replicating it in number to fill the ranks of the First Order, as had been done during the Clone Wars, wasn't enough for Ren. He wanted a specifically engineered pattern, a design tailored for each rank and purpose, to fit the First Order's needs exactly.

However, after decades of being outlawed by the New Republic, the craft of genetic engineering had virtually disappeared from all reputable planets. It had taken researchers nearly a month to track down one Taka Gorat, once revered for his work in gene manipulation, but now driven off into near obscurity. 

Once the right questions had been asked in the right circles it was revealed that the man was almost as famous for his work as he was notorious for his depraved tastes. Which must have been his salvation when genetic engineering was outlawed, as he had found a niche in the breeding of pleasure slaves. The business of trading in males and females genetically designed for pleasure had enabled him to build his own little kingdom on this unimpressive rock.

Smart footsteps approached and caused the general's mood to darken even further. Only a few weeks ago, Hux had been near impervious to scrutiny from anyone other than Supreme Leader Snoke himself. But with the despot's sudden death and the resulting shift in power, things had changed. No matter how degrading the mission, Ren had found a way to make it worse by assigning General Amret Engell as Hux's chaperone. 

While camaraderie was programmed into the lower ranks of the First Order—by Hux's own design—opportunism was what ruled those situated higher up. It had not taken long before the general's wakened position had attracted upstarts like carrion attracted clawbirds. 

Engell was no exception.

"General," the woman's greeting was cold and clipped, granting the very minimum of respect she would get away with when speaking to someone of the same rank. Hux barely nodded in response, not bothering to hide the dark thoughts which he knew were visible on his face.

"Looks like the transport is about ready," Engell said and then, "you're still disproving of this mission, I take it?" 

Hux felt his jaw tighten. The last thing he was in the mood for was inquisitive small talk with someone who, by rights, should be his subordinate. 

"This is a critical time for the First Order. It should not be wasted on making deals with lowlifes like this tinkerer," he said. 

"Gorat will deliver us a design we can build on," Engell mused. "And then, instead of having to collect recruits one by one, off of backwater planets, we'll just grow them. It will be faster, more efficient. And we won't have to keep dealing with locals so much."

"You know taking their children is an effective way to keep the local rabble in check," Hux answered irritably. He thought little of this new approach to filling the ranks of soldiers the First Order required.

"I do. It's what we once had to resort to, to keep order," the other General retorted. "But now that the Republic is gone and more and more planets are joining us, such crude measures have outlived their purpose. Don't worry, Hux. Your methods will continue to have their uses. Clones or not, they'll still need to be trained." 

This might have been interpreted as a comforting gesture, but the woman's dismissive tone proved otherwise. Ever since Ren had taken the responsibly of training new recruits for the First Order away from Hux and given it to Engell, she had fought to usurp Hux's influence at every turn. Which hadn't been too difficult, given the new Supreme Leader's open disdain for him. 

Hux, who had once been his open rival, answering to Snoke alone, had had to watch his grip on command crumble, as Ren installed his new Supreme Council—just another ploy to siphon power of decision away from Hux and into hands, Ren felt were safer to rely on. All, so the temperamental fool could scamper around the galaxy, unleashing his anger at the ever persisting rumors of his defeat at the hands of Luke Skywalker at the Battle of Crait. 

"General Hux?" down in the hangar a man in a black pilot's uniform had exited the shuttle and activated his comlink to reach Hux. "The shuttle is ready, Sir."

"Let's get this over with" Hux snapped and stiffly started toward the hangar, leaving Engell to follow at his heels. Just where she belonged.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Prologue and intermittently chapters here and there will not feature Lamees' point of view, as you just saw. But they'll have Hux and since he's who you're here for... ^_^
> 
> Also, please remember the ❤︎


	2. Negotiations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lamees lies eyes on Hux for the first time as Hux and Engell begin negotiations with her master.

I was kneeling at the feet of my owner, Taka Gorat, while he discussed business with his newly arrived guests. His chair was situated on a dais, slightly raised above the rest of the room. I had always found that pretentious, but Taka had his little quirks. Not being subtle about reminding all of us - as well as his occasional guest or client - that he was master on this base, was one of them. But at least this way I had a perfect view of the newcomers.

There had been much talk among the servants about them and their military order, newly risen out of the ashes of an empire which had fallen before I was born. So, I was understandably curious. 

There were twelve of them in all: two high ranking officers, each with an assistant and all of them human. Then there were eight soldiers, all in shiny armor and completely anonymous behind weird-looking helmets. I had been a little shocked to see that one of the officers was a woman, perhaps twice my age, with short blond hair and a stern expression. It made me wonder if there were more females in the group, hidden underneath that white plate. 

The other officer, the one leading the conversation, was quite a bit younger than her, had red hair and very, very pale skin. Certainly, a side effect from spending lots of time in space, because here on Iridan, a hot, arid planet, the UV rays penetrated all but the strongest shielding and pale skin was an attribute only ever seen on outsiders or non-humans. There was an air of impatience about the man and the exchange between him and Taka so far had been notably curt. Not to Taka's taste, I knew, since he loved to brag about his achievements in genetic engineering almost as much he enjoyed being soft-soaped by clients hoping to get a discount. 

"Take Lamees, here," Taka said, as he rested his hand at the nape of my neck and gave a cold chuckle. "Zeltrons are known throughout the Galaxy mainly for two things: Their never-ending urge to please and their intriguing pheromones."

I had heard him give this speech before. How Zeltrons were, by nature, invested in surrounding themselves with happy, content people - he didn't always mention that this had to do with our latent empathic ability, which simply made it more gratifying to be around people who were enjoying themselves - how they could use their pheromones to make people feel sympathetic towards them. And how he had made me different…

"Because of my design, she doesn’t have the same control over those pheromones as her brethren. They’re there, sure, but she can’t excrete them at will. Instead, they act as they did in the old days. As a defense mechanism, to calm potential enemies. You scare her, you hurt her - they’ll get sweeter and more intense." His thumb kept moving along my hairline. 

This was a sensitive spot and being stroked there could be very relaxing to me. But, in the presents of so many unfamiliar people and with the implication of my owner’s words, his touch felt anything but soothing. "But she is not capable to consciously manipulate anyone that way."

I knew what Taka’s intentions were, of course. I had been offered to guests before, usually for a few hours of entertainment, after a bargain well struck. Or as a complementary accessory to a room, if negations dragged on for more than a day. It wasn’t always bad, as long as they were clean and let me sleep in a bed after.

The general standing before us now was clean, all right. But I doubted I would be around him long enough to sleep at all. I could sense his impatience and a dull echo of frustration, which was probably why Taka had decided to direct his attention to me. Because, while what my owner had said about the pheromones of my Zeltron's heritage was true, there was also another effect. One he had carefully chosen to omit… Sexual stimulation wasn’t the only thing they were good for. Their biochemical composition could also induce a state of relaxation. Which was one reason Taka send me to people when negotiations dragged on, using me to set them at ease so they would be more likely to accept terms in his favor.

An irritated snort pulled me out of my woolgathering.

"I’m not interested in your _commodities_ , Gorat," the First Order general said with thinly veiled contempt. Obviously this guy enjoyed being here about as much as I enjoyed kneeling on the hard floor. "We have an agreement to reach. Don’t insult me by trying to distract from the fact that you have more to gain from this than the First Order does." I glanced up at Taka nervously - one thing I knew he didn’t take well was to be looked down upon."The restrictions on genetic tempering, implemented by the Republic, all but destroyed your business," the pale man continued, "I’m offering you the chance to return it to its former glory." 

Taka watched him through dark eyes. His face was impassive, but I knew the word 'tempering' used to describe his work had angered him. He saw the genetic manipulation he worked on as art, his creations as masterpieces. How often had he told me, plainly, that the only thing saving my life was his achievement in creating me, as he was punishing me for mouthing off?

"The First Order is willing to offer agreeable terms," the female who had arrived among the soldiers spoke up sharply. "You will design genetic codes to fit our needs and will be paid for each, handsomely. In addition, the restrictions on genetic engineering will be lifted."I was surprised again, this time at how easily the woman had taken over the conversation. Out here on Iridan - or at least on this base, the part I had spent most of my life in - females were very rarely allowed to join business conversations unasked. There had once been a sort of warrior from Mandalore, but that one had been so androgynous in her armor and shiny helmet, I hadn't even realized she was a woman until I had heard her speak. 

Taka considered her for a moment. "No," he said, evenly. "Genetic research, design, and creation can be a dangerous thing. I imagine it would be in the First Order's best interest to keep the restrictions in place. To discourage inapt individuals from trying their hand at it. Perhaps it would be wiser to grand rights of exception to those who have proven their skill at the craft, instead."

"And keep the competition to a minimum as an added benefit for you." The red-haired human concluded and I could see it made sense. Taka was pleased, too, I felt, as his hand left my neck and he got up. I watched him closely as he stepped down to meet the officers on even ground, knowing that to overlook even the smallest gesture he might use to indicate that I should follow would have painful consequences. 

As my creator, he had designed me to his tastes. And as my owner, he had taught me early on how he expected me to behave, especially when guests were around. 

Yet, to my surprise, no such signal was given. While Taka invited his guests to sit with him at the table usually used for negotiations of price and such, I was left where I was. On the one hand that gave me the opportunity to observe our guests while their attention was held elsewhere. On the other, sitting on my hunches for this long was a bitch and my knees had started to seriously protest. 

As the minutes dragged on, I shifted position a little, leaning against Taka's abandoned chair and distracted myself by watching the conversation unfold. Taka was being courteous to both officers and I could tell that it wasn't a matter of _if_ they would get into business, only a matter of what terms they would agree upon. The general with the red hair seemed to be the one less inclined to give Taka the price he wanted, arguing and cutting him down at every turn, while the female would probably have agreed to more favorable terms much sooner.

Occasionally, her gaze wandered and the one time our eyes met, I saw a look of distaste, before she turned away. The man also let his eyes roam across the room now and then, but his focus was different. I distinctly saw him glance over to the two entrances one moment, then over to his soldiers and Taka's guards, or keep track of Ada, an elderly servant who mostly took care of kitchen work and served and refreshed drinks at table. His face looked drawn, while his eyes were cold and calculating - and so bright, I wondered if he was running on stims. 

By the time the suns had set and my legs had been numb for so long, it had stopped bothering me, Taka called a hold to the negotiations. The man with the red hair protested, trying to insist they finished tonight, but - to my relief - the female officer sided with Taka, obvious in her attempt to placate him, and the parties agreed to meet again tomorrow. 

Once the officers and their escort had been ushered out, Taka returned to his seat at the table and only then, finally, did he wave at me to join him. My legs were numb and sluggish as I got up and the bracelets on my arm clicked together when I raised my arms above my head and stretched as I walked over. 

"What did you think?" Taka said as he took hold of my hips and easily lifted me up to sit on the table in front of him. He was muscular under his olive skin and had little trouble moving me around, like the doll I knew, many thought I was to him. 

"The red one - Hux? He hates being here, I think he's refusing you a higher price mainly on principle. But the woman feels like she has to prove herself. She might be prepared to offer you terms their order doesn't have the resources to cover, just so she can return with a deal."

Taka hummed his agreement and reached to pluck a jogan fruit off the table, which he offered to me. I started munching on it gratefully because, as a Zeltron, my metabolism was higher than that of a human, and after half a day of not eating I felt famished. I could devour four full meals a day, easily, and still feel peckish. 

"Engell would promise me the stars for a few genetic patterns. And in a year or two, once production is underway, she'd either try to pay me off cheap or negate on our deal altogether. But Hux is aiming for a realistic price. Most of the money he's offered would be paid over the next few years and only if I dedicate my work to the First Order exclusively. The bitch wants me out as soon as possible. Hux, though, he's willing to involve me in the production process. Overseeing a plant somewhere closer to the core systems, a way off of this rock. Autonomy, even, in a way.

"It doesn't exactly line up with what I've heard about him. Then again, I was surprised that he showed up here at all. Running an errand like this seems beneath what I've been told about his position." Taka's dark eyes studied me absentmindedly as I finished the last of the fruit and sucked its juice off my fingers."If he wants you to be more involved, maybe he's looking for an alley in the long term?" I offered.

"Yes, I think so, too. There have been rumors about a power shift within the First Order… I didn't give them much credit before, but maybe I was wrong."

I didn't know much about the political going-ons of the galaxy, only gossip shared among the slaves and servants of this base, half of which I thought exaggerated nonsense anyway. 

"How come you didn't offer them to stay the night? I bet, I could have found out what he wants, once I'd gotten him out of that stifling uniform of his," I said with slightly more bravado than I felt. It wasn't that I relished having sex with strange men, and those up-tight, military types could be vicious. But if Taka told me to do something, I didn't have a choice, anyway. Might as well make light of it. 

So, I grinned. But Taka stayed serious. 

"I want you to stay away from them," he said in a voice that brooked no argument. "Their order supports the High Human Culture and has no love for remembers of other races."I blinked in surprise. Out here on the rim, nonhumans often outnumbered humans, sometimes two to one. Plus, I wasn't fully Zeltron - my skin tone was much lighter than the red usually characteristic for the species, although if that was Taka's design or due to my human birth mother, I wasn't sure. And I did have dark blue, wavy hair, the tips lightened by UV exposure, true. A color that didn't occur in humans naturally, as far as I knew. But people dyed their hair all the time. Maybe, if Taka hadn't advertised my genetic make-up, the First Order officers might never have known. 

I was about to comment on that, but Taka chose that moment to rise. "Eat what you want from the table, then help Ada clean up and go to your room." 

Startled, I took hold of Taka's arm as he turned to go. There was a spark of annoyance in him, which I tried to quench by hopping off the table and pressing myself against him.

"Are you sure?" I purred. I really fucking hated sleeping alone. And Taka knew it, too.

"I'm not punishing you, Lamees," he said indulgently, brushing his hands through my hair. "But I need to work tonight. Which can be difficult with your distracting, little ass around."

Ready to promise that I would be a good girl and so quiet, he wouldn't even know I was there, I was stopped by his thumb on my lips and a warning in his eyes.

"And I want you to stay out of sight when they come back tomorrow," was the last thing he said to me before he untangled himself and left.


	3. Kitchen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Having been banned from interacting with the First Order, Lamees seeks company in the kitchens.   
> (No Hux, sorry. Next chapter, I promise ^_^)

The next morning found me sitting in the kitchen watching Ada, a small, elderly Latero, who was buzzing about, preparing refreshments. 

I'd had breakfast and was now nursing a cup of caf as, like always when I was forced to sleep alone, I had been tossing and turning most of the night, unable to go to sleep. It had been almost dawn when my loneliness won over my pride and I had stolen off to Ada's room, finally finding some rest on the floor next to the old woman's bed. As a result, I had been stepped on when Ada got up to prepare breakfast about an hour later - but I was pretty sure that had been an accident.

"You’re risking your skin, Lala…" she lectured me now, waving a knife at me with one of her four hands. I had unwisely confessed to being curious about the party of First Order officers, which had returned to the base about an hour ago. "I know Taka told you to stay out of sight. And you dunno what these people are like." 

Normally, nothing short of a burned meal could phase Ada much… she'd lived a life of hardship, losing a child in the cradle and having two others taken away from her to be sold off, once they had been old enough. Which was why, I suspected, despite her occasional grumbling about Taka spoiling me, she was secretly glad he treated me differently than any other slave. She'd let herself grow attached to me, against her better judgment. And Taka's pride in his design made it unlikely that I'd be sold off or broken or beaten to death over something stupid, the way it had happened to other slaves she'd known.

"I only said I _wanted_ to take a look at their ship, not that I was going to," I muttered into my mug.

"Never, in your life, do you ever listen when you're told not to do somethin." Ada's harsh tone startled me a little. The old woman so rarely raised her voice, I had begun to doubt she’d be capable. "But you better listen to Taka this time and stay away from them soldiers."

"Pff. Taka can go fuck himself. No way could the First Order be worse than this place." Now, I wasn’t a complete idiot. Of course, I knew it could always be worse than Iridan, worse than Taka.

"Oh, girl, you don’t know what you’re talking about. They steal children - babies - away from their mothers to turn into soldiers!" Ada tried to reason, but that argument didn’t impress me. 

"So, what?" I shot back. "That’s hardly worse than what was done to us. I can barely even remember my mother. But did you not see the woman who came with them? She’s one of them, she wears the same clothes and eats the same food as any of them. They don’t treat females like they do here, Ada."

"They destroyed an entire system, Lala! Five planets gone, just to demonstrate their power," she said. 

I just scoffed.

"Oh, please, don’t tell me you believe those stories? That’s just nerf shit Taka told us so we’d be scared and behave ourselves. Nothing in this galaxy has the power to destroy five planets at once, Ada. Nothing." 

That was right up there with the tales my mother used to tell me, of some Force and the so-called Jedi Knights who could use it to bring justice. She had probably meant to comfort me by teaching me about some higher power that would make life make sense someday. But all I remembered of those stories now was how betrayed I had felt when neither the Force nor any knight had stopped Taka from taking me away, once he had decided I was old enough to survive without her.

Ada came over to me, wiping her four hands on her apron before reaching out and taking my hand into one of her own. 

"I don't know if it's true or not, Lala." Her voice was back to its normal, gentle tone. "But these people are dangerous, that I do know. They almost shot poor Jaxon last night, and all the boy was doing was to try and take a look at their shuttle."

That startled me. Jaxon was a grease-rat, maybe eight years old, the son of one of the mechanics working in Taka's hangar. Not a slave, so shooting him could, at least theoretically, have caused them more trouble than shooting me ever would. 

"Is he alright?"

"Yeah, he's alright." The old Latero sighed. "But, Lala, please let that be a warning to you. Promise me you'll stay out of sight until they've left."

"Ah, fuck it," I usually kept my promises and Ada knew that. "I'll try to stay out of sigh, Ada. Promise."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this was so short. It was actually only half of what I had planned to put into this chapter, but I've been struggling a bit with finding the time to write and didn't want y'all to have to wait too long. ^_^
> 
> Next chapter should be longer and have more Hux again, promise.


	4. Misadventure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Because she (almost) never does as she's told, Lamees gets into trouble.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am SO sorry about the obvious canon mistake in the previous chapter. 
> 
> Thankfully, and by pure coincidence, I was rewatching Hux scenes to get inspiration and realized my mistake. It's since been corrected. That said, these things might continue to happen because my Beta, amazing person that she is, has watched Star Wars about once. And I am only human.
> 
> So, please, if you're a die-hard Star Wars fan and you see a canon mistake feel free to point it out and I'll correct it! ❤︎

I did try. Honest. 

But, after a morning spent taking care of my usual chores, I found myself characteristically restless. While Taka had been busy further negotiating terms with his guests all day, most anybody else on the base seemed to have remembered important assignments elsewhere. Which left me feeling virtually alone and, the thing is, I really fucking hate being alone. 

Zeltrons are social. We don't do well without company.

Which is why, in my opinion, I can't really be held responsible for trying to find something to distract myself with… even if _something_ was sneaking off to take a look at the shuttle in which the First Order officers had arrived. I knew the hangar like the back of my hand, so I judged my chances of not being spotted to be pretty good. Especially since, as I could see from the gallery, only two soldiers were on watch.

Carefully, I snuck in through the storage area to the south, hoping it'd be easier to approach the ship unseen from there, since the two soldiers were facing the other direction, toward the open hangar doors. The First Order shuttle had a weird form, unlike any ship I had ever seen and, once its massive bulk was between me and the guards, I marveled at how new and relatively untarnished its surface looked. 

Resting on its landing gear, the craft was heavily plated with black durasteel, its two towering wings reaching toward the ceiling, locked into a vertical position. From where I was standing, I could make out the two sublight eon engines in its back and reckoned that the hyperdrive unit would be tugged behind the plaiting between them. 

I knew a few basic things about ships from books I had read and from talking to Taka's mechanics while they were doing repairs. But I had never flown in one and I didn't actually know much about engineering. Despite this, even I could guess—from the heat sinks and the nodes on the surface of the wings—that this shuttle's sensor systems were impressive. Taking a closer look at the front-facing laser cannons was tempting but, weary of the soldiers, I tried to get a better look at its engines instead.

"It's a SJFS-200a." The voice startled me. I had been too busy admiring one of the ion drives to notice the man approaching behind me.

He was not dressed in the shiny armor of the soldiers but in high black boots, puffy pants, a black jacket, and gloves. His skin was pale and his hair reddish-blond, which reminded me of the officer Taka had been negotiating with. But that was were their similarities ended, because this man was a good four inches shorter, his face rounder and his eyes, despite also being bright, were much friendlier. 

"All Upsilon Class shuttles have them," he said affably and I gave him a shy smile, trying to cover up how much his sudden appearance had thrown me.

"I'm sorry, I'm probably not supposed to be here," I said and, just as I had hoped, my demure behavior set the man further at ease. 

"No, you're not. But I won't tell if you won't." He winked at me and I really hoped he meant it. Taka would be furious if he found out I had let myself get spotted by someone. 

Careful not to let my thoughts show on my face, I put on an air of admiration as I turned back toward the shuttle. A few steps, disguised as an effort of getting a better view, brought me closer to the officer and his emotions into sharper focus. Hopefully, that'd help me navigate this situation more safely. 

"You fly this thing?" 

Since he hadn't been part of the negotiations and wasn't wearing armor, I guessed him to be the party's pilot. And, since he had come through the door leading into the base, Mr. Pilot was now standing between me and the exit. 

"I do," he affirmed, "and two classes above."

I gave him another shy smile, now standing so close we were almost touching.

"That must be a lot of responsibility." Holding his gaze with mine and hoping to keep him too focused on me to notice that I was side-stepping him, I started getting ready for a quick retreat.

"It surely is. I…" Just when I had managed to turn us around, so the door was now in my back and my way clear, the officer's eyes flicked over my shoulder and the flirtatious expression melted from his face.

 _Fuck,_ I thought, as the sound of heavy boots in my back explained the sudden change in the pilot's demeanor. My heart hammering I turned around and, for a second at least, there was a flash of relief when I saw that Taka wasn't part of the group which had entered the hangar; nor was the female officer I had seen yesterday.

Instead, the small party of soldiers was led by the read haired general, Hux. Perhaps I still had a chance to get out of this without anyone else ever finding out that I had been here: I had no reason to think the First Order officers were even aware that I had been forbidden to interact with them, after all. Only acting too guilty could give that way. 

"General Hux," the redhead was greeted stiffly by the pilot as he and three armored soldiers approached. His annoyance, although clear on his face, was all but canceled out by the shier wave of anxiety coming off the man next to me. _Poor sod,_ I thought in sympathy.

"Is there a reason you're not at your post, monitoring communications, Lieutenant Tavson?"

"Sir. I was…" The lieutenant seemed to be searching for something to say that would not get him into further trouble and I took pity on him.

"It's my fault, really. I was just looking at—"

"Be quiet." The fact that the general didn't even bother to look at me as he snarled his command somehow pissed me off.

"Excuse me?" I said without thinking. There was a momentary pause, as everyone in our little group turned to look at me. Including Hux, who took the longest time about it. But once his eyes were on me I felt, for the first time, as if he was actually seeing me.

For one, wild moment I wasn't sure if he even remembered who I was. My clothes were different—yesterday, Taka had made me wear a getup which had basically consisted of Lashaa silk scarves wrapped around my chest and hip, covering the bare minimum of what wanted covering; today I was wearing a simple, linen wrap dress—my face wasn't painted and, during his entire visit so far, the general had barely spared me a glance.

Then he reached out and slapped me. 

It was a backhanded blow, without much force behind it. But my head snapped to the side regardless and I shrunk back a few steps, stunned with surprise. Taka had used a strip of leather to beat me with as punishment a few times, but he had never hit my face. 

"I would have expected that someone of your station had been taught to keep her mouth shut when ordered to." 

So, he did remember who I was.

"Well, I would have expected someone like you to know better than to piss off your host by damaging his favorite creation." 

Seething, I was about ready to spit into Hux's arrogant face. But two of the soldiers in his company had stepped up behind me and I was keenly aware of their alertness. Plus, while being Taka's would grand me _some_ protection, I would definitely be punished—beaten or locked up—if I went too far. Something I very much wanted to avoid. 

"Really?" The general sneered. "Because, judging by that introduction he gave you yesterday, being damaged for his pleasure is what he designed you for."

 _Uh-oh,_ I thought. Ada's words from this morning were suddenly ringing in my head, her worries over the possibility of my getting into exactly this kind of trouble. I really had to learn to keep my fucking mouth shut.

"Take her outside and shoot her."

 _WHAT?!_

"Wait," I protested desperately, as two of his soldiers roughly grabbed my arms and started to drag me away. "If you do this, Taka won't ever agree to a deal with you, I can fucking promise you that." 

A gesture from Hux brought the soldiers to a halt and he regarded me pensively for a moment. I felt my skin flush under his cold eyes but somehow managed to meet his gaze, all the while praying he would see reason. 

"You've really deluded yourself into believing he cares about you, haven't you? How pitiful." He nodded at the soldiers and my blood froze. But all they did was let go of me.

"Lieutenant," Hux barked at the pilot, "back to your station and you…" As he turned his eyes back to me the cold disgust in them made my skin crawl. "Run back to whatever dirty hole Gorat keeps you in before I have someone strip the hide off your back."

Because I could tell that wasn't an empty threat and because, as pig-headed as I could be at times, I didn't want to get flogged, I did exactly as he told me and fled from the hangar without another word.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy your weekend and please ❤︎


	5. Consequences

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fretting over possible punishment, Lamees is waiting for her master to return from his negotiations.

After fleeing from the hangar I retreated to the space I felt most at home in: Taka's chambers.

I could have gone to the kitchen… but I knew Ada would have taken one look at me and known that something was wrong. And while she was kind and would have tried to comfort me, she would also have been disappointed. And worried. And disappointing and worrying her was not something I felt up to facing right now.

I also had my own room, of sorts, the one I had been sent to the night before. But I only spent time there when forced to, usually as a punishment. Taka's chambers were where all my clothes were kept, where I retreated to, on the rare occasions I wanted to be alone, to read, curled up on a couch, or the seat by the window. Taka's bed was where I slept most nights, where we had sex and I could fulfill my purpose. Sometimes, we'd talk and laugh together, or I'd read to him.

Punishment for what had happened earlier was coming, I knew that. Even if the incident wasn't mentioned by the First Order officer, word of it would reach Taka somehow. And I was scared of what that would mean, sure—but not as scared as I had been right after the hangar when the gravity of what had almost happened had begun to sink in. 

Would those soldiers really have carried out their general's order and shot me? Or had General Hux been bluffing, planning to call them back at the last second? Would he bring it up to Taka, ask for me to be punished for talking back to him, perhaps? There had been times when Taka had beaten me with a belt, often till purple bruises would form. Once or twice to the point that I had bled, even. Would that happen again now?

Well, even if it did, I'd get through it. And soon after the First Order officers would leave and, hopefully, I would never have to see them again. That's what I was telling myself, as I sat curled up on Taka's bed, waiting for him to finish his deal and come find me.

Once the worst of the adrenaline had faded, tears began to form in my eyes and, since no one was watching, I let them flow freely. My restless night caught up to me soon after and I must have cried myself into an uneasy sleep. 

———

By the time a hand shook me awake, the suns had set and the chamber was cool and quiet.

Taka's face was hovering over me, but as soon as he saw that I was up, he pulled back, his eyes dark and serious. Instantly, I knew I was in trouble. And yet, his emotions were… strange. He didn't seem angry, as I would have expected, but resigned. 

"Get up. I have something to tell you." Before I was awake enough to ask what was going on, he had turned and left the bedroom. Given no other option, I got up and followed him.

"The First Order is leaving, Lamees," Taka said, once we were facing each other in the den. "And you'll be leaving with them."

I could only stare, trying to process what he was telling me, and before I could form a reply, he continued.

"Don't make me drag you out. It won't help you. Just go with them and do what they tell you to. If you do something—anything—to embarrass me, like trying to run, or fight them, I'll have Ada brought out and shot."

It felt like the floor was dropping away from underneath my feet. Dimly aware that I was trembling, I moved toward Taka, but the look in his eyes stopped me dead in my tracks. For over a decade, pleasing him had gotten me praise and angering him had gotten me punished, so I could read him better than any other person alive. Right now, I could clearly see that if I tried to touch him, he'd strike me.

He considered my clothes for a moment, the light, linen dress wrinkled from my rest, while I tried to get my brain to form coherent thoughts. Hesitantly, I turned toward the bedroom, but his voice called me back.

"Where do you think you're going?" 

"I…" My voice sounded thick, so I swallowed and tried again. "I'll get my things—"

"You don't have _things_ , Lamees. Everything you think of as yours, I own."

He was right, of course, and in some abstract way, I knew and understood that. But, up until now, I had failed to comprehend what it really meant.

"You can keep the dress you're wearing, and a pair of shoes, but nothing else. Now, go wash your face. You look like you've been crying. And hurry up, they're waiting for us."

"Wait, won't you let me say goodbye?" It was all I could think of to ask.

"No." The word stung like a slap. "You're too weak not to turn into a blubbering mess if I do."

Nauseated, I walked into the fresher. Taka was wrong, I thought, as I splashed cold water on my face without feeling it. I didn't have it in me to cry. I was too shocked. But I probably would have thrown up, if there'd been anything left in my stomach.

———

By the time we reached the hangar, my panic had coagulated into a painful weight in my gut. Part of me still thought this was a nightmare because everything around me had a dreamlike quality to it. Surely this was some kind of fucked-up joke. 

But Taka remained serious as he briefly exchanged a few words with the female general. Almost by accident, I met the eyes of the red-haired General Hux and noticed with a start that he'd been watching me. Slowly, a smug smile tugged at the corner of his lips and I realized—while I had no idea how or why—what was happening to me was somehow his doing. 

Once he could be sure I had seen the satisfied expression on his face, the general shifted his attention to Taka. Nothing but a curt nod passed between the two men before the First Order officers turned toward the shuttle and began to ascent its ramp.

I knew this would be my last chance to plead with Taka. But when I looked at him, his face was dark and I remembered his threat about shooting Ada. So, I lowered my eyes in defeat and meekly followed the rest of the party up into the ship.

As I tailed behind the officers in their black uniforms, the soldiers who'd been flanking the ramp closed in behind me and I had to fight a sudden onset of claustrophobia, of feeling trapped. The space I entered into felt too small for all of us, at least until the officers started to proceed into a different section of the ship, which I dully figured to be the cockpit. 

For once, I was too busy with my own raging emotions to notice anyone else's, despite being closely packed in with all these heavily armored people. Perhaps it was my lost expression, but one of those soldiers took pity on me. 

"Here, sit," he said, not unkindly, as he held down a fold-out seat attached to the shuttle wall for me.

"Wait," came a sharp voice and we both looked up to find General Hux had hung back from the other officers. "Seats are for passengers, Sergeant. The floor is good enough for cargo." And with one more smug, pointed look at me Hux left the passenger compartment for the cockpit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A good beta will point that an _Upsilon_ shuttle only has fifteen seats and that's one too few for the characters riding in it... A great beta, like [CariSilver](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CariSilver/pseuds/CariSilver), will help you out when you're not sure what to do about that by saying things like 'she's a slave, make her sit on the floor'. ^_^


	6. The Finalizer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux has won a spiteful victory but is uninterested in what happens with his price. Lamees is subjected to her greatest fear.

As soon as the ramp had closed cold air began to rush into the cabin and I shivered, huddled up in a corner on the floor as the general had ordered. I was hugging my knees to my chest in an attempted to stop my trembling, keep warm, and fight off a new surge of rising panic as the engines whined into life, the shuttle shuddered, and we took off.

The sergeant who had offered me a seat occasionally looked down at me, a hint of sympathy on his mind, but he was the only one to pay me any attention. The rest of the soldiers crowding the small space seemed at ease and, although no one was talking, I could sense that they were all glad to leave Iridan—my home—behind. 

Since there were no windows, I could not see how fast we were going, nor could my muddled mind judge how long our trip took. By the time the shuttle shook again, announcing our landing, my hands were ice cold, and my head was throbbing. 

With a precision that could only come from trained routine, the soldiers disembarked, forming a corridor for their officers, who followed a moment later. Not sure what was expected of me, I pushed to my feet and timidly trailed behind.

Disorientation washed over me as the sheer scope of the hangar we were in challenged my understanding of spatial coherence. I hadn't known vastness itself could have such a suffocating effect. Even the shuttle, which had seemed so imposing in Taka's hangar, looked comparatively small in this huge space. 

At the end of the ramp, the two generals had come to a halt and exchanged a few words before the woman walked off in one direction, and General Hux turned to me. 

"Lieutenant Tavson," he said, not taking his eyes off my face. 

"Yes, Sir?" The pilot I remembered from yesterday stepped up to us.

"Store this in one of the empty quarters on the lower decks," Hux ordered. "Make sure the doors are locked. I want no one in or out until we rendezvous with the _Steadfast_ "

"Sir? The _Finalizer_ 's reactor is scheduled for maintenance. We're not due to rendezvous with the _Steadfast_ for another three weeks…"

"I'm aware of our schedule, Lieutenant. I believe my orders were clear?"

"Yes, sir." 

"Good," the general gave me a last, lingering look. "Now, get this out of my sight." Then he turned and walked away.

With an expression of pained sympathy on his face, the pilot gestured for me to come with him. "This way, please."

Too cowed to speak, I followed him meekly across the hangar's imposing width to a turbolift. I managed to hold my tongue for quite a while as the lift ferried us through the ship's bowls, but the pilot didn't seem hostile and, eventually, I could no longer hold back the question burning on my tongue.

"He didn't really mean that, did he?" I asked softly, barely above a whisper. "Three weeks? I can't be alone for that long. I'll die."

"Well," the lieutenant started, filled with a rush of pity, which, in turn, gave me a spec of hope. "There's a dispenser in your room for food and drink. You'll be fine, you'll see."

Starving or dying of thirst wasn't what I was worried about, but I wasn't sure how to explain this to him. Then the lift came to a halt, and I was a stung by how relieved the pilot felt at having found an excuse to stop talking to me.

A short walk down a corridor brought us to a door, which the lieutenant opened, using a silver cylinder. At his gesture, I step through into a small, brightly lit room. A heartbeat too late, I realized that I had given away my last chance to plead with him as the door hissed shut behind me. 

———

After pulling a thin blanket from the bed to help with the cold, I sat on the floor. I managed to pass the first few hours with nothing but thinking, crying, and bathing in misery. There was a soft hissing noise at some point, and when I took a look, I saw a compartment had opened in the wall. Inside was a tray of food. 

I considered the brownish mush for a moment. It had been nearly a day since I had last eaten, and perhaps that was part of why I was feeling so wretched. But in the end, I turned away without having tried so much as a spoonful.

Thinking about Ada—how she'd always known that something was seriously wrong with me whenever I turned down a meal—brought new tears, and I began to cry again. Had she realized that I was gone, yet? How would she react? I thought of Taka, too, how he had threatened to shot her… would he really have done that? I had believed him at the time, but what if I had been wrong?

When dwelling on all this became too painful, I began to explore the little room, hoping it would provide some distraction. But there wasn't much to see: a narrow bed against one wall, a small table and two stools against the other, all securely anchored to the floor. There was a drain in a corner, and after some fiddling, I realized it was a fresher unit: A shower head in the ceiling and a toilet in the wall, both retracting neatly when not in use. 

Besides a simple com array next to the door, that was it. And I couldn't get the array to work—not because I didn't know how, but because it was powered down. 

There was no entertainment center, no screen. I didn't even have a datapad to read on for fuck's sake. What was I supposed to do with myself? Play with the light switch? For a wild moment, I considered using the bedding to clog the drain and see if the shower would spew out enough water to flood the room. Drowning would be a very ironic death for someone who'd grown up on a desert planet, wouldn't it? 

Another soft hiss brought another bowl of protein gruel. But by now, my hunger had turned into nausea, and it was even easier to ignore the food than before. Eventually, the compartment closed back up on its own.

Feeling lightheaded and tiered, I hoped to pass a few more hours with sleep. Only, if I turned the lights off, the room was in total darkness. And for some reason, maybe because I had never experienced that before and it felt completely unnatural to me, I couldn't stand it. So, I left the lights on, curling up on the bed and pulling the blanket over my head instead. 

But sleep didn't come, and soon I began to cry again, my sobs soft at first but getting more and more hysteric. Eventually, the anger brewing inside me won over my fatigue, and I jumped up, pacing through the small space restlessly. Then, looking to vent my frustration on something, I tore the bed apart. I started by ripping the pillow, its stuffing flying through the air like bits of foam. Next came the mattress, which offered a little more resistance, but ended up as shreds strewn across the floor anyway.

Spent and sweaty, I sank to the floor and sobbed dryly. My eyes stung, but I had no tears left to cry. 

I didn't even consider that my actions might have repercussions, right up until the door hissed open a few hours later, and a pair of armored soldiers entered the room, their boots ringing loudly against the metal floor. I sprang up in alarm, but neither of them said a word. They simply took hold of me on either side and, ignoring my cussing and squirming, dragged me from the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I posted this chapter early, because it's basically just the second half of the last one, and it has so little Hux. But never fear, the next one will have more and should be up by Friday night (UCT) ❤︎


	7. Interlude 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Interlude: Hux and Engell discuss what's to be done about Lamees.

"Do you really want to leave her like this?" Engell asked, her stern eyes fixed on the screen in front of her. On it was a live image of Gorat's little toy cowering against a wall in her cell. Since she had been so unappreciative of her previous accommodations, Hux had ordered her moved to one of the holding cells. 

"She's brought it on herself," Hux said, annoyed. 

He didn't need to look at the monitor to know what it was showing: He'd had occasionally succumbed to curiosity over the last two days and taken a glance at the feed. The image never changed much: The girl, folded up on the floor or sitting against a wall, her knees drawn up to her chest. Her face had been hidden most times, buried in her folded arms, resting on her knees. But once, about a shift or so ago, he had caught her staring into nothing. And he'd been startled by how hollow her eyes and sunken her cheeks had looked. 

"If she's survived into adulthood under Gorat's care, she'll last until we rendezvous with the _Steadfast_."

"Her vital-signs say otherwise," Engell disagreed. "We know Zeltrons don't survive for long in isolation; they're extremely social. Perhaps this one has inherited that flaw. Either way, since she started refusing rations, all her stats have dropped."

"How fragile can she be?" Hux asked, finally leaning over the console to look at the readings to which his college was referring. "It's been barely fifty hours." But indeed, the girl's stats had dropped into critical, mostly due to dehydration. She wasn't just thirsty—she was dying. 

Engell just shrugged. "Medical said it has to do with an accelerated metabolism. It's possible Gorat chose to keep those traits on purpose," she mused. "Think about it: a slave so desperate for interaction, she'd rather die of thirst than to stay isolated. And if that hadn't worked, then starving her into compliance would probably have taken a lot less time, if her body burns through its reserves this quickly." 

"You almost sound like you admire his work. If creating something so feeble was indeed his design. Unless," Hux looked back at the woman next to him and crocked an eyebrow. "Is that pity for the girl I detect, General?"

"No," she answered, and he could see on her face that she meant it. "But she _is_ valuable. Her genetic makeup might not have military applications, true. But her appeal obviously lies elsewhere. And for some," she handed over a datapad, and for a moment, Hux could only stare at it as Engell finished with a smirk, "…her appeal is worth quite a bit."

There was a list of offers, most exceeding the price of a medium-sized, well-outfitted freighter. Certainly more than Hux had ever expected anyone would be willing to pay for what was, essentially, a glorified pleasure toy. 

"What's this galaxy coming to?" he mused, more to himself. "She doesn't even have manners."

"Manners is not what they want her for, Hux," Engell replied, sounding bored.

"We have methods to keep prisoners alive against their will, even after vigorous interrogation. Perhaps we could strap her to a table and feed her nutrients intravenously…" he wondered.

"That process tends not to leave much of a person's mind intact. Even trained spies rarely last more than two or three weeks," Engell objected. "If you break her so completely, all these buyers might lose interest—well, most of them, anyway. And her value would decrease considerably." She shrugged. "If you feel she's not worth the trouble, then shoot her. Throw her out an airlock. Her increased metabolism makes it unpractical to keep her in stasis. And we don't have the means to incase her in carbon… But if you keep letting her starve herself, I'll make sure _you_ will be the one explaining to the council members why such a convenient asset was allowed to go to waste. Three of them have made offers for her, which are on this list."

"Then you take her!" Hux had long since lost patience with this conversation. 

"Not my type," Engell replied coldly. "General." She nodded, affording him the minimum of curtesy she could get away with, then turned on her heels and left him there, fuming. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm super nervous about writing Hux and getting his tone right. So, it's not too much to ask, please let me know how I did? ❤︎


	8. Deal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Not one to let valuable assets go to waste, Hux decides to offer Lamees a deal that might save her life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All my love to my wonderful beta, [ CariSilver](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CariSilver).
> 
> Please note: I have seen what extreme dehydration does to someone's mind, especially in the elderly, so please never take it lightly. Lala's symptoms are played down for plot purposes—irl a person who's gone without water for over 50 hours will usually be in a lot of pain, disoriented, and have trouble remembering things. 

Something was poking me in the ribs and I groggily tried to push it away. 

After a moment it came again, though, more insistent this time, dragging me back into conciseness. With a start, I realized that someone was in the cell with me, nudging my side with their boot. I pulled away, pushing myself up on shaking arms until I was sitting up against the wall. 

The sudden movement made my stomach heave and my head spin, so it took me a second to focus on the figure towering over me. Then I groaned. Looking down at me with cold eyes was General Hux.

If anything could make dying worse, it was seeing this man.

There was something in the hand he held out to me, a cup of some sort. When I didn't move to take it, the General set it down on the shelf-like cot I had curled up next to.

"Tell me this," he said. "On Iridan, you seemed to value your life, determent to live. Is that still the case?"

I considered for a moment, trying to get my sluggish mind to work.

"Not like this." 

"No?"

I shook my head. "I can't live like this. Alone."

"The isolation is not what's killing you," he remarked dryly. "It's this idiotic hunger strike."

I didn't bother to respond, and the General turned away from me, irritated.

"I could have you brought to the barracks," he mused. "Let you be passed around among the men. Would you prefer that?"

Would I? I shuddered.

"Please, don't," I whispered, but my voice was thin, and I wasn't sure if the General had heard me. He picked up the cup and held it out to me again.

"Drink it," he said firmly, and I looked up at him blankly.

"Why?"

"So I can have a coherent conversation with you. Now drink." If my choices were death by dehydration or being fucked by dozens of soldiers each day, I would rather go through with dying. And yet, something in his tone, in how he felt, made me accept the cup from him and take a careful sip. It was water.

He kept looking down at me, and because I felt his impatience grow, I took another, proper mouthful. My throat hurt when I swallowed, but the water was cool and felt good, so I kept sipping. 

"I have never met anyone pathetic enough to give up on life over a few weeks of solitary confinement before." His tone was conversational, yet his words stung.

"It's not like that, I just—" I was about to explain what it felt like for me to be without sentient contact for too long, but the General cut me off with a gesture. 

"I'm not interested in what genetic flaw, or programming, or other nonsense is causing you to be this weak-minded," he said impatiently. "I'm interested in sorting out this mess you've caused me." That was so unfair, I almost laughed. But I didn't have the strength. 

"What I'm proposing is this: You will be moved to my quarters, where you'll be in my company in-between shifts. I assume that will be sufficient… You don't require—" The General seemed at an awkward loss for words, "physical contact?"

"You don't have to fuck me if that's what you're worried about," I said testily, and the General grimaced in distaste. 

"What a relief. Believe me, I don't want that filthy mouth of yours anywhere near me. Or any other part of you, for that matter."

If I had been more myself, I would have been able to come up with a retort. But my head hurt, and I was scared that the General would decide to leave me here to die if pushed too far. So I kept my mouth shut, and after a moment, Hux gathered himself and continued. 

"You will be moved to my quarters," he repeated, "and you will stay there, in my company but out of my way. In return, you will stop this foolishness, eat, drink, and behave yourself as well as you're able. You'll get out of these rags and clean yourself up, after which you'll be examined by our medical staff and your slave implant will be removed—" I interrupted him, but my throat was still raw.

"What?" He was annoyed, but I couldn't tell if that was because I had mumbled or because I had spoken at all.

"I said, 'I don't have a slave implant'. Taka told me so."

Hux shook his head, annoyance turning into derision. 

"You really don't know him that well, do you?" I looked at him blankly, and he crouched down, so we were almost level. "Of course you have an implant. Gorat delivered its code to me the day he gave you away. And I'm not letting you into my chambers with an explosive device, so we'll cut it out of you first." He straightened again, seemingly oblivious to the shock he'd just dealt me. 

"Then, once we make our rendezvous, I'll hand you over to the highest bidder, and you'll no longer be my problem." That last part was uttered more to himself.

"Those are your choices: The barracks, where you'll have all the physical contact you can handle," he sneered. "Or my chambers, where you'll be left in peace, as long as you behave yourself."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Man, I could not wait to post this chapter. Hope reading it was as much fun for you as writing it was for me. ^_^
> 
> Enjoy your weekend!


	9. Quarter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After agreeing to Hux's conditions, Lamees is left alone in the General's quarters to think.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to the wonderful [CariSilver](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CariSilver/pseuds/CariSilver) for editing.

After I had agreed to Hux's offer, everything had been done as he had said. I had been given more water and, once I was strong enough to walk on my own, had been brought to the sickbay. There I had been made to shower, given a set of snuggly fitting, thermal clothes to wear, and was thoroughly scanned and examined. Most of those tests were done by a scary-looking droid, which I couldn't help but flinch away from. But thankfully, the part that had worried me most—the removal of the slave implant I hadn't even known was there—was done by a human. 

When he was finished, the medical officer covered the small incision between my shoulder blades with a bacta patch and instructed me to leave that on for at least half a day to prevent scarring. And then he did something Hux had not warned me about: A thin, black metal ring was fitted around my neck like a collar. It was just loose enough for me to be able to move normally. But I felt it pinch a little, especially at the sides, and against my throat when I swallowed. 

The medic explained that this device did not only have a tracker, but that General Hux could also use it to electrocute me, should I "displease" him. The officer was firm but not unkind about his explanation. Yet the thought of the man who had basically destroyed my life within a single day having such a convenient tool to hurt me with made me shudder.

Several times I was given some sort of sweet, thick past to swallow. Something to replenish the nutrients my body had used up to keep me alive over the past two days, I was told. And when all this was done, and I had been deemed healthy enough to be left on my own, I was once more escorted through the ship via turbolift.

This ride took quite a bit of time, but eventually, I was let into a rather spacious apartment and instructed to wait for General Hux. 

Regular First Order shifts last for four hours each, the medical officer had told me. But higher ranking staff would never get their work done in such short cycles, so the General would not be back in his chambers until at least the end of the fourth shift. Being the commanding officer on board as Hux was, I was sure he had plenty to keep himself occupied with. Quite contrary to me.

The first minute or so I stood and looked around the room, feeling lost. There were no windows—which made sense on a ship I supposed but made me feel a little claustrophobic. Everything was either grey, black, red, or—very occasionally—white. The wall to my right was basically a kitchenette: several closed compartments, an uncomfortable-looking table and benches, and something I could just so identify as a food dispenser. Directly in front of me was a sitting area, consisting of two couches facing each other over a low coffee table and an armchair. And to my right was an open doorway leading into a second, smaller room. 

A queasy feeling came over me as I spied the bed inside. I had lashed out at Hux at his remark about physical contact, and he had lashed right back… but had he meant it? 

If he changed his mind, there would be nothing I could do to stop him. He wasn't as muscular as Taka, but taller. And I was sure he'd have no trouble to physically overpower me. He also knew what I was, that I had been designed and trained as a bed slave. In the past, when Taka had sent me to have sex with one of his guests, I had always been able to ignore my own preferences and serve them well. It was part of who I was. I could do the same with Hux, if I had to, I told myself.

During my musings, I had wandered into the second room. The bed was wide enough for two, easily. Which raised the question if the General usually slept alone, and this was just a luxury; or not. There was only one control panel next to the bed, though, and one bystand, both on the left side. And there was another door, also to the left of the bed.

Curious, I activated the door and stepped inside. It was a small fresher unit, neat and sparklingly clean, like the rest of the apartment. I was too cowed to go through the compartments lining the wall, but a bottle mounted inside the shower caught my attention, and I stepped over to sniff at it. It smelled clean and fresh, and I vaguely remembered the scent from the medical officer who had removed my implant.

I faced the mirror to have a look at myself. My skin looked pale and shallow. Dark pink shadows had formed under my eyes and made them look unnaturally bright. And around my neck, the collar. I was very aware of it, still: Every time I turned my head or rolled my shoulders, its metal pinched my flesh. It wasn't painful, though—just a strange sensation I would have to get used to.

But how would it feel like to get electrocuted by it? I hoped I wouldn't find out.

 _'All the physical contact you can handle,'_ Hux's words suddenly came back to me, and I shuddered.

———

Around midday—or the end of the third shift, as the display was kind enough to inform me—I was startled out of playing around with one of the consoles: a small compartment in the food dispenser had slid opened with a chime, and I found a tray of food waiting inside. I hadn't ordered anything, and it brought back unpleasant memories of being stuck, alone, back in that first room. But I took out the tray regardless. Eating regularly had been part of my deal with the General, after all. 

And the food wasn't half bad, either: Two kinds of vegetables, one leafy and one starchy, and a piece of meat; topped-off with a bit of gravy—definitely an upgrade from the protein gruel I had been offered before.

After I had finished with my meal, I put the tray back into the open compartment, which promptly closed with a soft hiss. How weird that officers on this ship seemed to prefer as little contact with other people as possible—if even their food was delivered via electronic means, rather than in person. 

Just as the medical officer had warned me, it took another five hours before the General returned. 

I spent the time familiarizing myself with the layout of the apartment and fiddling with the appliances, as much as I dared, anyway. When he entered, I had just finished stretching—which had felt pretty good because I hadn't done it in two days—and was lying back on one of the couches, wondering what the fuck I'd do all day while Hux was gone. 

I sat up to greet him and suddenly realized I didn't know how. 

Part of me wanted to thank him. Part of me remembered that, if it weren't for him, I would still be on Iridan with the people I loved. So I said nothing. 

The General, for his part, took a moment to study me, and I looked away, suddenly unable to stand his gaze. I was glad that the back of the couch shielded me at least partly form his inquiring eyes. Before I knew what I was doing, I self-consciously tugged on the metal ring around my neck. 

A collar like this was the obvious mark of a slave. I had seen them, occasionally, on saves belonging to Taka's clients. Slaves who had been cowed and silent, always on edge around their masters, or numbed to a point they barely even felt _there_ to me anymore. And while Taka had trained me in the positions and attitudes he expected me to assume while guests were around—the little signals he would give me to follow, or stay, or speak, or remain silent—he'd never enforced these behaviors while we were alone.

But what did Hux expect of me? Did he want me to fall to the floor and kneel? Or maybe stand in the corner, still and quiet, like a servant? Was I expected to take his jacket, maybe have a drink ready for him?

Taka had spent the first four years I had been with him teaching me about these things—but Hux had not given me any instructions yet. And suddenly, I was terrified I'd lose my chance of survival over something as simple as not knowing how he wanted me to behave.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't ask me why, but I picture the First Order "standard smell" as a lavender-mint-mixture… Something clean, fresh, and androgynous.  
> Also, sorry about the cliffhanger. ^_^   
> Chapters 9.Quarter, 10.Rules and 11.Touch started out as one chapter in three parts, which just kept getting longer and longer. In the end, my beta [CariSilver](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CariSilver/pseuds/CariSilver) came up with such delicious titles for each part, that I couldn't help but split it all up so I'd get to use those. ^_^
> 
> Rules will be up Wednesday and Trust will be posted Thursday/Friday at the latest. Because Hux might be an ass, but I'm not. o_O


	10. Rules

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux puts down rules and isn't nice about it. Lamees is doing her best

The few moments before the General spoke felt like an eternity. 

"I received a report from medical," he said without preamble. 

"You are in good health. Apart from what you have done to yourself." He stepped into the room, and I couldn't help hugging my legs against my chest when he rounded the couch to face me. "I expect you to refrain from such foolishness in the future." 

I could feel him look at me expectantly, and nodded. 

"Good." He sat down on the other couch. His posture was straight but relaxed—in complete contrast to me, since I was all curled-up but humming with tension. 

"To stay here, you will have to follow a few rules." 

He held up a small, silver square he had pulled from his uniform. 

"This is the remote to your collar. If you try to get your hands on it—if you ever so much as reach for it—it will be the end of you. And it won't be the barracks, it won't be a cell. I will have you strapped into an interrogation chair and tortured until your mind shatters and your body gives out from the pain. Do you understand?"

My breath hitched, but I nodded. 

"Did you lose your ability to speak?" he asked impatiently. 

I shook my head, which only caused his frown to deepen. And just as I realized my mistake, pain suddenly made me flinch. 

"No, I can speak," I pressed out and then, "fuck, that hurt." A shock from the collar felt like being hit with something small and hard. My hands had flown up to press against my neck, but that didn't help at all when the next shock came. 

"Then answer me when I ask you a question," the General said coldly. "And don't curse at me."

I didn't have the nerve to glare at him, so glowered at the remote in his hand instead. He remained silent for a while, maybe to see if I would comment, then he continued. 

"That was a shock on the lowest setting," he explained, matter-of-factly. "There are several more severe. Test my patience, and you will find out what those feel like. The highest will incapacitate and possibly kill you. And the collar is set to respond with lethal force if removed without the proper code, so don't meddle with it."

I nodded to show that I understood. The medical officer had told me all of this already, but he'd been a bit kinder about it. 

"The dispenser is programmed to provide meals automatically. You can choose what you want up to half an hour before each scheduled delivery. If you don't, you'll eat what the dispenser has picked. Right now, it's set to three meals a day. Will that suffice?" 

"I usually eat four," I said, hoping the truth would please him more than me lying for his convenience. 

"Fine, I'll have that adjusted. Anything else?" 

I shook my head. 

"And stay away from the alcohol," he added. Like all Zeltrons, I had two livers and a high tolerance for intoxicants, meaning I'd have to drink a lot more than he before it would affect me any. But I didn't point that out. 

As he leaned back, the General's eyes finally left me, and he looked absentmindedly into the room, contemplating something. Only then did I realized how much his stare had bothered me. It was like he had the power to pin me in place with nothing but his icy gaze. 

"I'll be away on shift most of the day. And when I'm here I expect you to keep out of my way and not make a nuisance of yourself. As long as you do that you have nothing to fear from me."

I highly doubted that, especially since he had threatened me with death by torture only a few moments ago. 

"You'll have to find something to do during the day. What did you do and Iridan when you weren't—" he made a vague gesture, "entertaining Gorat?" I could feel a certain disgust in him and it surprised and pissed me off at the same time. Did he really find the idea of Taka and me having sex that repulsive? Spitefully, I decided I wouldn't let myself care what he thought. 

"Read, be in the kitchen, go to the market…" I said, coolly. "Taka pretty much let me go wherever I wanted."

"Well, not here," Hux said sharply. "You will not leave these quarters and the door will remain locked. If you attempt to fiddle with it—" 

"Where would I even—" A shock shook me. I flinched. 

"Don't interrupt me."

I clenched my mouth shut and glared. I could feel that the General got a certain satisfaction out of zapping me with that thing, and not snapping at him took some effort. But when he gave me a hard, warning stare I quickly looked away. Once I had lowered my eyes his annoyance began to fizzle out and eventually he got up and pulled his uniform jacket straight. 

"We'll figure that out later," he said, stiffly and then, "stay."

He walked toward the other room, and once I was sure he couldn't see me, I rolled my eyes at his back. _'Stay.'_ Like I was some kind of animal he had to train. 

I had expected him to fetch something from the bedroom, but instead, the General disappeared into the fresher. When he hadn't come out after a few moments, my posture began to relax. After ten minutes I rested my chin on my knees, after fifteen I had repositioned my legs, folding them underneath me, and was leaning against the back of the couch, my head resting on my arm. Then Hux remerged. 

As before, his hair was combed back severely and now also wet. But his uniform was gone, replaced by a pair of slacks and a long shirt, both dark grey and similar to the pair I was wearing, just looser. So he had taken a shower and changed—made sense, I supposed. 

He also had a datapad with him and it looked as if he was going to sit back down on the other couch, but then the dispenser chimed. Frowning, the General looked at the screen to check the time, and I registered his surprise. 

"All right, come," he said, and after dropping his datapad in the armchair, moved into the kitchen and took the first tray out of the dispenser. 

Nervously I got up and followed him to the table where he had put the food. Now that I was closer to the General, I could see the small, silver square of the remote was somehow attached to the breast of his shirt. How convenient for him. 

I sat down and we started to eat. At first, I think we both considered having a go at a conversation, but in the end, neither of us did. I was still nervous, but with every passing minuted Hux became more at ease, and consequently, so did I, the silence between us soon turning from awkward, into bearable, into somewhat comfortable. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're not quite done with this night… sleeping arrangements still have to be made, among other things. All that and more in Chapter 11: Touch, ready to be posted by Friday. ^_^  
> As always, a huge thank you to [CariSilver](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CariSilver), whose patience with me is beyond awesome.


	11. Touch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As sleeping arrangements have to be made, the General notices some intriguing side-effects of Lamees' physiological design.

Once we finished eating, the General drew himself a mug of something hot from the dispenser and left me to dispose of our trays and glasses. When he sat down in the sitting area, I noticed he chose the armchair this time. 

I took my time putting everything away, but eventually, I was done and had to decide what to do with myself. Warily, I approached the couch I had been on earlier and sat down. The General looked up at me briefly but went back to reading without voicing any objections, so I pulled my legs up and got more comfortable. The slippers I had been given were soft but thin and barely able to keep away the ship's chill, so I tugged my feet under my body to keep them warm. 

Resting my arm on the back of the couch, I put my head down and began tracing the fibers of the fabric with my fingers. I made sure not to look at the General directly, to draw as little attention as possible. 

If asked, I would have sworn on my life that I found his presence revolting. But the truth was, while he was reading and his thoughts were elsewhere, his emotions became calm and soothing. After a few moments, I could even feel my eyelids begin to drop. Understandable, I guessed, after the upheaval of the last few days. But it surprised me anyway. 

Just as I had started to drift in and out of sleep, Hux pulled me back into conciseness by rising and picking up his now empty mug. After disposing of it in the dispenser, he proceeded into his bedroom without so much as a word. 

Hesitantly, I got up and followed. 

"Where do you think you're going?" The General looked equally surprised and irritated when he saw me lurking in his doorway. 

"I don't know, I just…" I wasn't sure what to say, feeling completely lost. 

"You said you didn't need—"

"I don't!" I interjected hastily before he could start talking about 'physical contact' again. "I just don't know where you expect me to sleep."

"On the couch. Or the floor, if you prefer, but out there."

Yeah, I could do that. Only… I regarded the bare looking furniture with apprehension, and thinking about how cold the room was I hugged myself. 

"You'll need a blanket," Hux said, and I looked at him, surprised and a little grateful even, that he'd picked up on my predicament. 

"Here." He stepped forward and opened a compartment in the wall. Inside was a soft, but thin-looking comforter. Since I knew it was all I would be offered, I stepped forward and picked it up. I felt tense like a bowstring standing so close to the General. And when something brushed the spot between my shoulder blades, I nearly jumped out of my skin. 

"Fuck," I huffed in surprise. 

The General, who had come up behind me, now took a step back, his hand resting on the remote attached to his shirt. I flinched. But he didn't shock me. Instead, he softly breathed out his annoyance. 

"Don't be silly," he said. "The medical report said to check on your incision after half a day." 

"Oh," I said softly, feeling like an idiot. 

I reached back over my shoulder and felt for the bandaid underneath the fabric of my shirt. It felt warm as I laid my hand flat against it. The General looked at me with interest but didn't say anything. I just figured he'd never seen a Zeltron before—we're a bit more flexible than humans. 

"I think I can take it off myself."

"But you can't see if there's a scar—Lamees, look," he said, and finally took his hand away from the remote. "I said you'd be left in peace, as long as you behaved yourself. But fighting me is not 'behaving yourself'."

It was the first time he had said my name. After this long, I had begun to wonder if he remembered; or cared. 

I eyed him warily, but he was right: Fighting would bring me nothing but trouble. Seeing no other choice, I swallowed and turned my back to him. My fingers clutched the comforter to my chest, as the General pushed the fabric of my shirt up and out of the way. I reached over my shoulder to take hold of it, so he had both hands free to remove the bacta patch, which he did swiftly and efficiently. 

I could feel the room's cold air with new acuteness, on my exposed back and stomach, but especially where the warm patch had been. And then the General's fingers were there, too, as he checked if the incision had left a mark. 

Suddenly my heart was hammering, and the first tell-tale shivers of arousal raced over my skin. There was a deep loathing for Hux inside me—but this was the first skin on skin contact I had felt since… since Ada had held my hand, in the kitchen, over five days ago. The longest in my life, I had gone without being touched by someone, I judged. 

"Perfectly smooth," the General said, his voice low and a little husky. His fingers were wandering over the whole of my back, which made it clear he was not merely talking about today's incision. "I have to admit, that's not what I expected… Especially given your lack of self-restrained and unwillingness—or inability—to follow orders." 

His words brought back memories of being beaten with a belt as punishment, and I had to fight hard not to shudder. Taka had, on a few of those occasions, broken the skin and drawn blood, yes. But he had always made sure there would be no scarring, too. 

"Today's wasn't my first bacta patch," I said and hoped the General would leave it at that. 

"I suppose I can see why Gorat would avoid marking you permanently. You are no ordinary farm animal, after all."

Due to the difference in our height, the General had been forced to stand a step away from me to properly see my back. But with his examination completed, he closed that gap and I tensed. I knew all too well what stress like this did to my pheromone production. Just the more surprised was I when the General's hands left my skin, and he started to pull down my shirt to cover my back. 

Then he brushed my hair away from my shoulder. All he did was have a look at the collar, but his fingers now stroked against the sensitive skin along my hairline, and I really wished he would stop. 

"It's irritated," he said. "You're skin is sensitive."

 _You have no idea,_ I thought as a wave of goosebumps rushed over me. 

"You should learn to watch that mouth of yours." His voice was low, serious, and very close. I could feel a hint of amusement in him, but also several other things which did nothing to calm my racing heart. 

I nodded. Since I wasn't sure how steady my own voice would be, I'd rather not use it right now. I heard Hux breathe deeply, as a short moment dragged out forever. 

Then he said, "get out of here," not with malice, but with finality, and moved away. 

Absurdly grateful, I retreated back into the other room and luckily remembered to turn off the light as I passed the switch. I had just enough time to settle on the couch before the General doused his own lamp, leaving us both in darkness. 

The couch was hard and the room cold. And knowing that General Hux was only a few feet away had a curious effect on me: For now, his presence kept me slightly on edge, but—just like the rhythmic tick-tock of the old chronometer in Taka's chambers, or the steady hum of this very ship—I knew it was the kind of thing which agitated one at first and then, over time, would become soothing in its familiarity. 

And even if he had not sent me back to the couch—if he had taken me into his bed—I would have preferred it over having to go back into isolation. No question. Maybe it was because I was mostly Zeltron, or maybe it was conditioning. Taka had clearly nurtured this tendency in me because it meant that I would always come back to him, always seek his company, no matter what. 

_Only to give me away…_ and I wasn't even sure why or what for. 

A few tears leaked from my eyes, and I whipped at them angrily. Then the day's exhaustion caught up with me, and at last, I fell into an uneasy sleep. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 12 will be another Interlude and to be honest, it's not quite done, yet. For some reason, I'm stuck and have been writing Hux/Lala BDSM stuff instead. But hopefully, it'll be up sometime next week.
> 
> And, in case you haven't seen it on my profile pic, yet, Cari made this pretty image of Lamees, using a young Jessica Findley as a model.  
> [](https://ibb.co/TP4Cwzf)  
> Click[here](https://ibb.co/TP4Cwzf) to see the whole image.


	12. Interlude 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Interlude: We get a glimpse of what Hux is thinking about Lamees.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to [CariSilver](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CariSilver) for editing. ❤︎

Hux was staring at the screen in front of him. 

The shift had been changed twenty minutes ago, yet he was still in his ready-room, adjacent to the bridge. Not particularly out of character for him, to put in extra time reviewing reports and such. But there was always gossip on a ship like this, and to his restless mind, the thought of drawing attention by lingering had begun to feel almost as uncomfortable as returning to his chambers. 

Before Snoke's death, something as silly as this would never have weighed on his mind. Before Snoke's death, he had been one-hundred percent secure in his command, not only of this ship but virtually the entire fleet. Before Snoke's death, he hadn't had to wonder about how long it would be until Ren finally decided to get rid of him. 

And he felt the pressure of his precarious position taking its toll: Hux had never needed much sleep, which was fortuitous, given his rigorous schedule. But lately, the few hours he spent in bed between shifts had not brought any significant rest, and what little sleep he had gotten had been disrupted by nightmares. 

An unbecoming display of weakness and, therefore, not something he could easily seek treatment for. So, after first caf and then caffeinated supplements had failed him, he had turned to stims. Acceptable measure for an officer, during a campaign. Not acceptable as a continuous habit. 

This brought his thoughts back to why he was still here, instead of in his chambers reading reports, his habitual activity in the evening. The girl. And whatever it was about her presence that had both agitated and—dare he think it—soothed him last night. 

Her language was abhorrent, her relaxed posture graceless, and the way she had destroyed the bedding in her first accommodations? A lack of composure worthy of Kylo Ren himself. Making her one more impetuous child which fate had seen fit to curse him with. And yet… 

Activating his com, he ordered the medical officer who had headed the girl's examination to join him. The lengthy transfer via turbolift from the sickbay to the bridge the man would have to undertake left plenty of time for Hux to go over the medical report again. 

And there it was: Just as Gorat had mentioned, her Zeltron heritage caused the girl to excrete some kind of biochemical pheromone cocktail. Gorat had made it sound like something that happened under duress, maybe torture. A sneer crossed Hux's face as he wondered if his presence was so intolerable as to cause this effect in her. 

Then again, the way she had cowered at first… perhaps she had been more scared of him than he had anticipated. Good, he thought, a little fear would help keep her in line. 

The report further noted how an increased hormonal production caused the girl what medical called "a heightened response to sexual stimuli" while simultaneously preventing a menstruation cycle and, subsequently, pregnancy. Yes—he remembered the way she had quivered beneath his hand, the goosebumps which had formed under his touch. How her breath had deepened and her eyelids had fluttered. 

There had been something enticing about knowing that, no matter what he decided to do, she would not be able to get away from him. And now, in the light of day, this disquieted him: Never before had he been tempted to take an unwilling woman into his bed—in truth, the thought had always disgusted him. 

Ren sometimes used this kind of innuendo during interrogations, and while the man had never followed through—as far as Hux knew, at least—he wouldn't put it past him. Rape was just the kind of thing that would appeal to a vile mind like Ren's. 

But not Hux's. Which meant his arousal last night must have been caused by her pheromones, and only that. For the first time, Hux realized the true predicament her engineered physiology could cause the girl. Another man, someone with less self-control and more insidious desires, likely would have allowed himself to get swept up in the rush of it all. 

Just as Hux marveled at Gorat's thoroughly devious design, his door chimed. 

Surgeon-Major Daru entered looking, as Hux noticed with satisfaction, slightly nervous. Members of the Medical Corps tended to conduct themselves in a more casual manner than other officers would get away with, which, to Hux, made dealing with them irritating as a rule. 

"I received your report about—the girl we picked up on Iridan." For a moment, Hux had been at a loss at what to call her exactly. 

"Yes, Sir. Everything to your satisfaction, I hope?"

"With the report? Yes." With the girl, though? He almost scoffed. "Tell me your impression of her. Anything you did not put in here." Hux indicated the datapad with the report on it. 

"She's an interesting specimen that one," the Major began after a moment's consideration. "Approachable, if one stays calm and shows a bit of kindness. She seemed especially nervous around the droids, yet given her simple upbringing, that's not surprising. I expected her to suffer from atmospherical adjustment issues, but she didn't complain about any." 

"What issues would that be?"

"Headaches, nausea, confusion—not unlike symptoms she must have felt from dehydration and malnutrition already. She didn't complain about those, either."

"Complaining about things she did to herself? I don't expect much from her, Mayor, but that would have surprised even me." Hux took a moment to determine how best to approach the topic he wanted to discuss. "The report mentioned several physiological differences between her and a human or even a normal Zeltron?"

"Yes, Sir. The increased metabolism, wider range of motion, and to an extent, the pheromone production occur naturally in Zeltrons. The later has been modified, however, as noted in the report. Her hormone production and skin-sensitivity have been heightened as well, Sir." 

"Skin-sensitivity? Would that make shocks from the collar more painful to her than to a human?" Hux didn't particularly care if it did; even had, in fact, considered increasing the severity of the shocks. Taking into account that the girl was likely used to a bit of pain from Gorat, he did not want to risk her thinking she'd be able to resist when it came down to something critical. 

"No, Sir, I don't think so." Again, the medic considered for a moment. "Even on the lowest setting, the shocks are strong enough to cause an involuntary muscle spasm. That's felt deeper than skin level. But if irritation develops at the contact points, she'd feel that more acutely, I suppose. That shouldn't happen unless the caller is overused, though. Sir." 

"How often the collar gets used is not up to me, Major. It's purely dependent on her own behavior."

"Of course, Sir." 

Their candidness was part of what vexed him about medics, but it would work to his advantage in this case. On to the point then. 

"You mentioned her pheromones, Major. Did you notice an effect when you were around her?"

"Did I..?" The major cleared his throat. "Yes, Sir, they were noticeable. At first, especially while she was being scanned by the droid and while I was removing her implant, their effect was rather obvious. Once she was calmer, though, it became more subtle. Soothing, instead of…exiting." 

Hux nodded. So he had been right in his suspicions. He could see both merits and complications in a companion whose mere presence set one at ease: In a weaker mind, and over time, something like that would probably cause a false sense of affection. On the other hand, as long as she kept her mouth shut, the girl's calming effect might be something he'd come to appreciate. Last night's sleep had already been the best he'd had in weeks. 

"Gorat didn't mention that effect, but I thought I noticed it too. Would you call that a deliberate consequence of her design or an accidental side effect?"

"I couldn't guess, Sir. But she's not unintelligent for a non-human," the officer allowed. "Perhaps she knows?"

Perhaps she did, Hux thought. But would it be worth the trouble to ask her?

"Is it reasonable to assume the effect of those pheromones increases with proximity, Major?"

"Yes, absolutely. While airborne, pheromones produced by vertebrae seldom travel further than a few feet." 

"Understood," Hux nodded pensively. "Dismissed."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do First Order officers have ready rooms? I have no idea. There're none specified in the Cross-section book. The book does, however, show that the sickbay and the bridge of the _Finalizer_ are ridiculously far apart from each other. o_O
> 
> And please note that what Hux is thinking about Ren is *his* point of view, not mine.


	13. Sleep (E)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux orders Lamees into his bed, expecting a good night's rest. (Rated for non-consensual intercourse)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the first true E-rated chapter and it’s what the dub-con and non-con warnings of this fic are about. So, if you’re only here to read about sex (and I appreciate that, because I do it, too) you might want to skip on to Chapter 15. I doubt this is what you’re looking for. ^_^ 
> 
> Editing done by both [Cari](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CariSilver/profile) and Lisa. ❤︎

I had woken up several times during the night. My unfamiliar surroundings and not being able to tell what time it was had been disorienting. The room had been cold, and despite Hux’s physical closeness, I had felt lonely. And the metal around my neck pinched, even more, when I was lying down. So, in the end, I think I spent more time awake tossing on the hard couch than I did asleep. 

In what must have been the early morning, I was pulled back into consciousness by a grating, buzzing sound, and seconds later, the light turned on in the bedroom. Then there was a rustling of fabric and the hiss of a door. 

I figured I had as much time as Hux would spend in the fresher to decide what I wanted to do. Should I get up and prepare something for the General? Breakfast? Caf? After the night I'd had, I wasn't exactly in the mood to deal with him, though. Nor had he given me any hint as to what he expected of me—other than to stay out of his way. This was why, in the end, I decided I would pretend to be asleep: If he wanted me to do something for him, he could wake me and say so. 

He didn't. He did turn on the overhead light when he emerged, but I had wisely turned around to hide my face against the back of the couch. I heard him rummage around in the kitchenette and cross the room a few times, leaving the smell of caf in his wake. And once he stepped into the sitting area, making me tense. But all he did was put something down on the low table before he left the apartment for good. 

Still wary, I listen for a few moments, yet, despite having left the lights on, the General did not return. I peaked over the back of the couch to make sure he was gone, then checked what Hux had left on the table. It was a datapad. At least now I'd have something to occupy my mind with while I was alone. 

I sat up and stretched. My muscles were stiff, but just when I had made up my mind to take a hot shower to help with that, the main door hissed open, and two droids entered. The first was a very sinister-looking sphere with a black finish and several arms, which hovered about three feet off the floor. The second was basically a box, white and shiny, and followed the first like a pet. 

I wasn't very familiar with droids—Taka preferred slaves, always saying they were less expensive—and watched with apprehension as the duo moved further into the room. But, to my relief, they turned and headed toward the bedroom. Craning my neck to see what they were doing, I realized the sphere was using its many arms to rid the bed of its sheets. The white box then opened up, presenting fresh ones, which the sphere proceeded to put on the bed. 

Just as I was feeling foolish for being afraid of droids sent to change linens, the pair emerged from the bedroom and headed straight for me. I hastily vacated the couch, thinking that was where they were headed to tidy up. But the black sphere floated right past, following me instead. It freaked me out a little, but in the end, all it did was lie out a few sets of clothing, taken from the white droid's compartment. After that, they both left. 

I had a look and, to my delight, discovered that, next to another set of shirt and pants like the ones I was wearing and some underwear, there was also a dark grey dress. It had short arms, a loose cut, and would fall down to my ankles. I had never been a fan of wearing pants, and the ones I had been given were so snug and soft, I was sure the dress would be less revealing. 

Feeling carefully optimistic, I headed into the fresher to shower. 

——— 

It was even later when the General arrived this time. When the dispenser had chimed, for the fourth time that day and well into the fifth shift, I wasn't sure if he'd expect me to wait for him. But since only one meal was offered by the machine, I went ahead, assuming Hux would either eat later or eat elsewhere. 

And since the table and benches in the kitchenette were horribly uncomfortable, I ate sitting cross-legged on the sofa. Then I continued reading on the datapad the General had provided. There wasn't really that much interesting stuff on there, but it was something. 

When he did finally drive, he purposefully came toward the sitting area and then froze. I followed his eyes to the couch table and saw my plate from earlier, realizing I had simply left it there. 

_Oh shit_ , I thought and jumped up to grab it. Quickly, I disposed of it in the dispenser, then turned to face a very annoyed Hux. 

"I'm sorry," I muttered, "it won't happen again."

"No, it won't," he said, sounding eerily certain. For a moment, I thought he'd punish me somehow, but then something else caught his attention. 

"Why are you not dressed?"

"I am dressed."

"Yes," he said, a note of forced patience in his voice. "In a nightgown…"

Oh, so that was what the dress was meant for?

"I just like this better than the other things." I didn't want to explain that I felt more exposed in the tight pants and shirt than in this loose shift. For a moment Hux looked at me, and I think he was trying to make up his mind if reprimanding me was worth the trouble. But luck was with me because, after taking a calming breath, he slightly shook his head and headed to the fresher. 

I was a little astonished at how often the General seemed to bathe. I was pretty sure he had taken a shower this morning before he left, after the one he had taken last night. And now again? Wasn't water in short supply on a space ship? I had always thought so. 

When he returned, Hux was again out of his uniform, wearing a pair of dark grey slacks and a long-sleeved shirt. Getting himself a hot drink from the dispenser, he then found a place on the couch facing the one I had sat back down on. I thought about trying to start a conversation, but to be honest, I was still relieved that he had dropped the topic of my dress and didn't want to give him an opening to bring it back up. Instead, I stared at the datapad, pretending to read. The General, too, had picked up a pad and was reading, apparently having decided to ignore me for now. I stole a few glimpses at him through my lashes, but soon the same comfortable silence from yesterday began to settle between us. 

Well, not quite. I was still getting used to Hux, his emotions were strangely guarded and sometimes hard to put my finger on. But tonight, I did feel like there was a bit of tension in him that hadn't been there yesterday. A sort of anticipation, like he was waiting for something to happen, or an opportunity to mention something. 

And I, curse it, started to feel something new, too. My thoughts drifted back to last night when he had removed the bacta patch from my back, to the goosebumps-raising sensation of his fingers dragging over my skin. It wasn't _just_ the sexual side of it: While I had reacted spitefully aggressive when Hux asked about it the day before, being deprived of physical contact for a few days and then feeling it again had made me realize how important it was to me. How comforting. 

Which was, of course, fucked up and completely insane. This man had torn me from my life, planned to keep me in isolation for weeks, caused me to nearly starve myself to death, and then put a shock collar around my neck, which he used at so little a provocation as swearing or interrupting him. And so far, I hadn’t even had the guts to ask him why he had taken me away from Taka. It didn't seem like he was interested in using me for, well, what pleasure slaves were usually used for. So why? 

I noticed the collar’s remote was again attached to his shirt, which meant he hadn't given up on using it. Or did he expect me to do something crazy, like attacking him? Perhaps the feeling of anticipation I picked up from him meant he was planning to fuck me after all, and he thought he'd have to use the threat of the collar to get me to play along. 

I thought about that for a moment. If he wanted to take me to bed, would I object? He was clean and—I stole another look at him—not bad looking, actually. He was a bit taller than Taka, his frame leaner but still pleasantly build. Taka had a graceful fluidity to his movements, while Hux's had a military efficiency, which made him look a little stiff at times but was well suited to his environment. 

I had sensed his initial disgust at the thought of touching me, back in the cell. But he wouldn’t be the first man to convince himself he was too good for a certain kind of interaction with a certain kind of individual, only to throw these convictions overboard, once the opportunity for a good fuck arrived. 

I suddenly noticed that the General hadn’t taken a single sip from his tea, the mug seemingly forgotten on the table. And just at that moment, as if he had read my thoughts, he put down his datapad and picked up his drink. Then he regarded me silently for a moment, and his gaze felt so invasive, I pulled my legs up and hugged them against my chest. I couldn’t even bring myself to meet his eyes. 

“Tell me,” he said, “do you know anything about your presence affecting how well someone sleeps?” 

"Yeah, a bit." I said cautiously, putting my chin down on my knees. "Taka is a nervous sleeper. He used to only manage a few hours a night, when he was lucky. But since I’ve been around…well. I’m not completely sure why, but when I’m there, he sleeps fine." I shrugged. 

"You’re not sure? So, it’s not something you do consciously?" he asked. I wasn’t sure where he was going or why he was interested in this particular detail. 

"It’s not a conscious effort, no. More like something in my body chemistry," I tried. “Just like the rest of those fu—erm.” I had caught myself just in time, sort of. But the General’s hand still twitched, leaving the mug for a second as if he were itching to reach for the remote and shock me. 

_That’s still a thing then. Duly noted,_ I thought. 

Apparently, him knowing that I had realized the threat was there was enough for him, for now. But when I didn’t continue, because I thought it might be safer not to, he made an impatient gesture. “Go on.” 

“Well, it’s the pheromone thing, I guess. You heard what Taka said…normal Zeltrons have some control over them and use them consciously to set people at ease, make them happy. But I can’t do that. In me, they’re always there, but when I’m relaxed, they’re harmless. Most people barely even notice, they just feel comfortable around me. But when I’m scared or hurt…well, you heard him.” 

“And did he? Hurt you, simply so he could enjoy the effect?” 

I really wanted to tell the General that that was none of his fucking business. Shifting uncomfortably, I stalled as long as I dared. But as I felt impatience mount in Hux, I didn’t really have a choice but to answer. 

"Sometimes,” my voice was low, but somehow I couldn’t bring myself to speak up. “Not very often. And he didn’t have to hurt me that bad, it was enough for him to scare me.” But Taka knew me better than anyone, so that wasn’t too hard for him. A soft shiver ran through me and I tried to cover it up by hugging my legs tighter. 

The General looked at me for a moment, then nodded. And to my surprise, he put his mug down, picked up his datapad, and went back to reading. Feeling a bit awkward, but mostly relieved, I pulled up the blanket I had slept under and retrieved my own pad and did the same. 

Only this time I couldn’t quite get back to losing myself in the frivolous story I’d been reading. I felt too aware of my heart, the beating rate slightly above average, just like my breathing. And just when I was distractedly thinking that I wasn’t really looking forward to spending another night cycle on this couch, Hux put down his datapad and got up. I wouldn’t even have looked up, had I not felt so wired, and when I saw him stop and half turn back to me my heart rate seemed to double. _Oh, no._

"Come." The General didn't even look at me when he said it, just stood there, between the couch and the bedroom, waiting. I should have said something intelligent, like 'That's a bad idea' or 'Maybe better not' or even 'Please, don't'. But all I managed was "Uhm…"

I didn't really want to have sex with Hux, especially after what he’d just made me admit to him. Had that turned him on? Had I stupidly just convinced him to take me to bed, purely by talking about the occasional abuse I had suffered? _What the fuck?_

The General had started toward the bedroom again and stopped when I didn't follow. He heaved a small sigh—which I found a little dramatic—and his hand strayed to where the remote was attached to his shirt. That made my mind up for me real quick, because whatever he might be planning to do to me, I doubted it would be more painful than being zapped. And less painful than being locked up alone somewhere again. Yeah, as fucked up as that was, I preferred being used to being alone. 

And I wouldn't be able to stop him in the end, anyway…I just felt angry, thinking about how pretentious he'd been. 

I almost commented on that out loud when I reached him. But when I saw that he looked almost as tense as I felt, I decided it would be better not to test my luck. Resigning myself, I pushed past him into the bedroom, mouth dry and skin hot, and stood by the bed waiting to see what the General would do. I felt him move, but instead of coming up behind or touching me, I was sidestepped, and he sat down on one side of the bed, the side with the control panel on it. 

"You'll sleep here tonight," he informed me curtly, as he removed his comlink and placed it on the small bystand. But not the remote, I noticed. For a moment, I considered trying to explain more about my body chemistry, maybe give him a clue as to why men didn't just kick me out of bed after a fuck. 

But then I thought of the couch and of how much I hated sleeping alone, of how cold space could be, and how this was obviously about him wondering if I could help him sleep more restfully. Of how the bed was big enough that we wouldn't even touch… and stupidly, stupidly I got under the covers next to him. He doused the lights immediately, and I tried to relax, to minimize the outpouring of pheromones. 

I was grateful for the softness of the mattress and thought that, if I really wanted to, I could just wait until he was asleep and then go back to the couch. The cold hard couch. And of course, I didn't, and shortly after his breath evened out into a slow, steady rhythm, I allowed it to lull me to sleep as well. 

——— 

As I woke up, the first thing I felt was a tickling in the back of my neck. Then, as I became more aware, I realized I wasn't lying on my stomach like normally, but on my side, leaning against something. 

The General had apparently woken up and pulled me to him, his hand now resting on my stomach, and the tickling was him breathing into my hair. The room was dark apart from the soft console light on his side of the bed…but Hux wasn't asleep. And I couldn't blame him. Even half-awake as I was, my skin felt as if each hair was being raised by electricity. 

_Damn pheromones_ , I thought. This wasn't fair, not to me, not even to the General. I had made a tremendous mistake when I had decided to slide into bed next to him. 

For a moment, I wasn't sure what I wanted more: For him to remain in control of himself…or not. 

I tried to keep my breath even, but I could feel it deepen, heat rising from my chest into my cheeks. And what was affecting me was affecting the General, too, as I could feel clearly against my backside when he pulled me against him tighter. 

Then he pushed me onto my back and rolled on top of me. 

I was tense enough to snap, but I let him. Maybe I wanted him to. Most likely I had already reverted into that weird state of mind, where sex was just comfort or stress release, and sex with someone who meant nothing to me was easier than sex with someone who did. 

Before I was even fully awake—maybe he preferred to pretend I was asleep—Hux had pushed my dress up. I felt slightly claustrophobic under his weight and a bit surprised by how fast he was going. But after being constantly wired throughout the last few days and now still groggily relaxed from sleep, I was also growing wet. 

Which was good, because just a few seconds later the General had freed his cock, shoved my underwear aside and pushed into me. His face was pressed into the crook of my neck, and he didn't say anything, barely even made a sound. So neither did I. All I did was lift my hips to make it easier. Because, I might have been wet in anticipation, but the few moments I'd had between waking up and him practically ramming into me had hardly been enough for me to be fully ready. Nor did he find it necessary to give me a moment to adjust to him, instead continuing with the same, almost frantic pace he had begun. 

Not that it hurt… it didn't really. Just burned a little. Pain, I was somewhat used to, as much as I tried to avoid it. What I wasn't used to was this hurried, almost frenzied fucking. A few more thrusts and he was done. And he had scarcely made a sound, nor looked at me. His face had remained pressed into my neck, and his hands had barely touched me, aside from gripping my hips to hold them steady. 

I counted three breaths before he pulled out, pulled his slacks back up and rolled off of me. Still following his lead—and feeling slightly surreal, as if I might be dreaming—I said nothing, didn't even move, as he turned his back to me and fell still. After a few moments I, too, turned onto my side, my back to him again, awkwardly rearranging my underwear to avoid it pinching me. I started to feel his cum leaking out of me, but I stayed still a while longer, hoping he would go back to sleep. I'm not sure how long I managed to fight the urge to rise and clean up, or if he was asleep by the time I snuck into the fresher. If he wasn't, we both pretended he was. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I pitched the idea for this chapter to [Molly](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Molly__Tortoiseshell__1980/works), her reaction was “Yeah, what is it about Hux that makes us all believe he would just fuck whoever he wakes up next to at night?” and that still makes me laugh every time I think about it. xD


	14. Dark (E)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lamees learns new details about the First Order, leaving her even more scared of what the General might do, should she find the courage to confront him. (Rated for non-consensual sex)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's another non-con/dub-con warning due for this chapter (last one, I promise) Some past sexual violence is also mentioned.  
> And for those of you who're here for the smut, you'll have to wait for one more chapter. In the meantime have a look at [You're So Cold](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22551850/chapters/53890705) a dark companion OneShot featuring Lamees and Hux.
> 
> Huge thanks to Cari and Lisa for both input and beta! ❤︎

The next morning, I woke up to the buzzing sound of an alarm but pretended to sleep through it. Even as the lights came on and the General got up, I more or less kept pretending, pulling the sheets over my head as he went to take a shower. With a little luck, he'd just leave and allow me to get some more rest. 

It wasn't like there would be a sun to keep me awake, after all. What had been so disorientating when I had first come aboard—the absence of a consistent day and night cycle—was starting to grow on me. And indeed, after the General had come out of the fresher and was done dressing, he doused the lights as he left. 

How strangely considerate of him, I thought, once I was alone. Just one of many unsettling thoughts swirling through my head as I tried fruitlessly to go back to sleep. Only three days ago, I had been so desperate for sentient interaction that I had been willing to die rather than endure the torture of isolation. And now I felt upset that the General had fucked me as an exchange for a comfortable bed and a little company? Eventually, I got up and, since I had cleaned up rather swiftly last night, decided to take a shower. 

I felt puzzled. And more than a bit _denied_ , which brought on more confusion. On the one hand, Hux had made his distaste of what I was and what I had been designed for—used for—quite clear. On the other, what did he think it was that he had done last night? And why the _fuck_ did I feel so utterly frustrated? What was wrong with me? 

For a moment, standing under the hot water, I considered masturbating just to get some of the frustration out of my system…but then I was too stubborn to. And, anyway, I didn't really expect it would help. Much. 

_Gods._

As I came out of the fresher, I was startled by something moving in the bedroom. But it was just the cleaning droid changing the sheets, its many arms humming and clicking softly as it deftly tucked everything into place. Those things still weirded me out. I couldn't even tell if it knew I was there. But perhaps it did, cause it left me another set of clothes, including three fresh shifts this time. So, I changed into one of those and sent the old one down the laundry chute I had found in the fresher. 

I spent my day trying to distract myself by reading about the ship I was on. After my musing about the water supply, I had hoped my datapad would yield some information, and it did. And fuck was I surprised: This thing was _huge_. It did not only dwarf the base I had spent the bigger part of my life in by more than two klicks…its population nearly reached all of Iridan's! 

Somehow, this gave me a whole new perspective on who I'd been dealing with: There weren't that many technical specifications on my pad, but several cannons were mentioned, both turbolaser and ion. Judging by that, the First Order could have eliminated our entire base from orbit without much effort. 

This made me think back to the stories I had heard about the First Order before they arrived. Things I had dismissed as rumors and exaggerations, as war propaganda. But what if it was true? What if this Order really had destroyed several planets at once? Killed billions of people at once? 

I felt cold, and not just from the low temperature of the room. What had I been pulled into? After all that, I had trouble forcing down the food the dispenser delivered, but I gave it my best.

Part of me had considered confronting the General, once he'd come back from his work, but now? Maybe I'd be wiser to just keep my mouth shut, at least for a few more days. What he'd done had been horribly frustrating, true. But I wasn't hurt, and I was still breathing. Perhaps not a given, I realized now that I was more aware of what he represented. And who knew? Maybe now that the General had experienced the power of my body chemistry, he'd decide to exile me back to the couch? That I could live with. As long as he didn't send me back to that cell. 

That thought truly scared me. I had no idea what I would do if he did. Begging wouldn't work with someone like him, I was pretty sure. Maybe I could seduce him? It might be something we could both profit from since it would ensure that the General would have no reason to hurt me, and it would take care of the sexual frustration he'd left me with last night. Sex was something I was good at when given the chance. 

On the other hand, thinking back at what he'd said in that cell and how he'd so far looked down on anything to do with my function and design—at least as far as sex was concerned—I wasn't sure if a plan like that wouldn't backfire on me. Could a simple lack of experience be the reason for his erratic behavior? I didn't know much about how the First Order viewed sexuality, but the Rules of Conduct and the dress-code I had come across on my datapad were all rather stiff and asexual in their wording. 

Musings like that kept me too preoccupied to read anymore, and by the time the General returned, I was so on edge, I had to fight the urge to jump off the couch when the door hissed open. 

_Well, that won't help with the fucking pheromones_ , I thought angrily. 

This time he headed straight for the fresher without even looking at me. It was late again, and I wondered if maybe he'd stayed away to avoid me. The few seconds he'd been in the room with me hadn't really been enough for me to get a good read on him…but what if he did regret what had happened last night? 

Perhaps that would give me the chance to discourage him from bringing me into his bed again? But was that really what I'd want? Not to be touched for who knew how long? The pilot had spoken about three weeks, but I wasn't sure what would happen when that time was up, what it would mean for me. One of a hundred things I really wanted to ask him, but by the time the General remerged, once again in dark grey thermo-wear, it was too preoccupied trying to get my racing heart under control to speak up. 

"You can put your clothes in the compartment that blanket was in," he said as he sat down on the other couch, "I don't want them lying around." His voice was cold, and, now that he was closer, I could feel he was...tense, somehow. Guarded. 

Which was why I decided to keep my mouth shut, at least for a bit.

"The blanket, too," he added, just as I had gotten up to do as he had said. "Since you won't be needing it anymore."

My heart sank. Not only did that bash any hopes I had had that he might send me back to sleeping on the couch. I also spent most of my day reading, huddled under that throw to keep the cold of space at bay. I turned back to him, considering to argue, but my eyes fell on the remote attached to his shirt. And as he looked up, annoyance mounting in him, I realized I didn't have the guts. So, I picked up the blanket, then the clothes the droid had left on the bed, and stored it all in the bedroom. 

I jumped at a noise, but it was just the General activating the dispenser. And, having little choice, I rejoined him in the sitting area. 

In the hour or so that followed, I made up my mind to say something for about a million times. And yet, somehow, no words ever made it out of my mouth. By the time the General was done with his tea and got up, I had to admit to myself that I just wasn't willing to risk angering him. That I was too scared of the collar and all the other threats he had made—the cell, the barracks, even having me tortured to death—to fight him. 

And that was why, when he stopped between the sitting area and the bedroom, just like he had done yesterday, and said "come" without even looking at me, I got up and followed him meekly. 

———

The next time I woke up in the dark was much like the night before. It had been harder to fall asleep and I was awake faster—which was good because the General seemed in even more of a hurry than yesterday. 

I was already on my back, his body pressing me into the mattress uncomfortably. It felt close and hot, and while warmth wasn't something that bothered me, I was wondering if he didn't feel too hot. Maybe he thought he'd prevent me from fighting him if he kept me pinned down with his body. But all it really did was make it awkward when he tried to pull up my nightgown. My slight hopes of maybe him touching me this time, even just a little, to help me get ready, were bashed as I felt him push down his pants and pull himself free. His head was buried in the crook of my neck again, his breath fast but deep, and I panicked slightly as I felt him push my underwear to the side and position his cock to drive home. 

"Wait—"I almost begged. 

I really wasn't ready yet, and my hands flew up to grab his arms. But in the end, all I could do was press my feet into the mattress to get some leverage and push up my hips. The General didn't have Taka's muscular frame, but as he put most of his weight behind the thrust, the rest pressing down on my chest, I had no way of stopping him. So what, if he interpreted my pushing up against him as encouragement? It couldn't be helped…I needed to get my pelvic bone angled right, or I'd be in some serious pain.

Still, it wasn't exactly comfortable having him force himself into me so quickly. And perhaps he felt it, too, or maybe heard my noise of discomfort, because this time, after bottoming out, he stilled. Not for long, really. Just long enough to reposition his hands and pull his knee up a bit to get better leverage. But it took pressure away from my chest and gave my body a chance to get wetter, easing the burning, awkward pressure his sudden intrusion had caused. 

His legs were spreading my thighs wider apart, so I gave up pushing against him and draped my legs over his instead. With this new angle, his pelvic bone gave me some of the friction my clit had started to ache for, as the General began to move. I moaned softly in appreciation, daring to hope I might finally find the release I had been craving since the night before. 

My hands wandered from his arms to his back, one fisting in his shirt, the other going up to the back of his neck. I could feel his body heat. He was sweating and so was I. Only, I suspected, I felt a whole lot warmer to the General than he did to me. Perhaps that was why he pushed himself up a little more, I thought, wishing he'd freed at least one of us from our clothes completely.

His head remained pressed into the crook of my neck, and his speed increased, just as I had started to really enjoy his deep, steady thrusts. I barely had time to think _no, not yet, please…_ before he gave a short grunt and a final shove. His orgasm rushed through me, but it wasn't quite enough to take me over the edge with him before he tensed and I could feel a new warmth spill inside me. 

_Fuck._

He barely allowed himself two deep breaths before he pulled out and pushed off. I had to force my hands to let go of his shirt and grit my teeth to keep in my moan of frustration. What the fuck did he think he was doing?

I felt hot and sweaty in my shift. Cum was leaking out of me in an infuriatingly tickling sensation, no matter how hard I pressed my thighs together. The General was somewhere next to me, but I didn't much care. This time I didn't give him the courtesy of enough time to pretend to be asleep: I swung my legs out of bed and rushed into the fresher right away. Once in there, I pulled the nightshift off, my heart still racing and heavy breaths sucking in the heady scent of sex.

I stepped into the shower. On Iridan, water was precious, and even one full shower per day a luxury. But I was longing for a chance to cool down as well as a chance to stall before having to go back. So, at first, I set the shower to cold, but then I thought fuck it, changed it to scolding hot, and frantically rubbed myself to an empty orgasm as steaming water cascaded down my body.

It wasn't much, but it was something.

After the short high was over, though, I realized I now felt ashamed as well as frustrated. Why did what the General had done make me feel even more used than what Taka used to do to me? Was it because with Taka fucking had felt more like…sex? Like two people actually participating? Or was it simply the chemical release of a satisfying orgasm, which the General had denied me?

I mean, I had no illusions: I knew that when Taka had made me come, it had only been for his own enjoyment. Pleasing me had had nothing to do with it. Consideration wasn't something an owner had for a slave.

Hell, he had even forced it out of me, using his knowledge of my body accumulated over nearly a decade. And then, albeit very rarely, and only in one of his most violent moods, he had sometimes fucked me so painfully that coming was as far from my mind as it could possibly be and the only release I had prayed for, was for him to finally stop.

Was that why my body craved to get _more_ from Hux? Had I been so thoroughly conditioned to act the whore? Or was it a misguided need for autonomy? The small comfort of getting my own pleasure out of an act I basically had no choice but to participate in? A refusal of letting me feel ashamed of my sexuality, even if it wasn't actually real?

A single, strangled sob escaped my lips before I was able to pull myself together. Ignoring the tears that had joined the water streaming down my face, I shut off the shower and wrapped myself in a towel. My nightshift went down the laundry chute, and I stepped out of the fresher.

The door hissed shut behind me automatically, of course, throwing the bedroom into almost complete darkness, and I stood still for a moment while my eyes adjusted enough for the small console light on the General's bedside to make it possible for me to see.

I knew it wouldn't be enough light for his human eyes to see more than the ghost of my silhouette, even if he were looking. So I had no qualms about dropping the towel as I fished a fresh nightdress from the closet and pulled it over my head. I climbed back into bed next to him somewhat stiffly and could tell he wasn't asleep—his breathing wasn't quite deep enough—but with me back here, that would probably soon change, I thought. 

And only a couple of minutes later, I noticed I had been right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Zeltrons have a slightly higher body temperature than humans (about 40°C/105°F) and I was supposed to mention that in the Interlude, but I forgot. <_>


	15. Symoxin (E)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A slight complication leads to an unexpected evening. Rated (E) for explicit sex and some non-consensual drug use.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm a day early, but I didn't want to wait anymore. Smut-readers, this is where your fun starts ^_^ A thousand thanks to Lisa and Molly who both had a look at this chapter back in December and gave it a thumbs up. And thanks to Cari for helping with the recent adjustments.
> 
> And thanks **so much** to all the people who've left Kudos and comments, bookmarked and/or subscribed to this story! ❤︎ Y'all are rocking my world. ^_^

It was the second time I woke up next to the General as his alarm went off and my desire to acknowledge his presents in the morning was at an all-time low. Luckily, his routine didn't change, and, once he had showered and dressed, he extinguished the lights and left me to my thoughts. 

When the cleaning droid appeared to change the sheets, I grudgingly vacated the bed and retreated to the living area, trying to distract myself with my datapad. The burning between my legs had somewhat subsided during the night, but my confused thoughts had kept me from getting any real rest. This was probably why, sometime after my third meal, I unwisely fell asleep on the couch. 

By the time I woke up, there was a familiar throbbing in my head. Groaning, I got up and went over to the food dispenser for some water. While forcing down my drink, I tried to figure out if there was a way to make the dispenser spit out meds. Back on Iridan, I had normally used a dose of Ryll to fight these headaches. Ryll was derived from Spice, though, and I didn't even know if the First Order considered it legal or not. 

I had survived these attacks without help a few times before when Taka had withheld meds as punishment. And since I didn't manage to convince the dispenser to produce anything but the preprogrammed choices of food and drink, it looked like I would have to do so again. 

As the throbbing got worse, I dragged myself back to the couch, pulling my legs up. Normally, I would have retreated to bed in the hopes of sleeping through the worst of it - but the thought of the General coming back and finding me there left me feeling strangely uncomfortable. 

So, I stayed put. 

The headache wasn't the worst I had ever had. And since I wasn't sure how the General would react, I decided not to bring it up when he came back. At first, this took no effort, as he followed his routine of disappearing into the fresher without so much as acknowledging my presence. Even as he took his accustomed place on the other couch, freshly showered and dressed in thermo shirt and slacks, and I pretended to be reading on my datapad, my ruse seemed to work. 

Only when he got up some time later, to get a cup of that tea he usually drank before bed, something caught his eye. Perhaps it was the clamminess of my face or the unhealthy pallor of my skin. I could feel him studying me and looked up. 

"What is wrong with you?" he asked, obviously annoyed by this new complication. 

"Nothing," I said, hoping he hadn't noticed me cringe at his impatience. "It's just a headache. I get them sometimes. It's nothing." I hadn't been able to look him in the eye as I said it, but to my relief, he moved away, and I could hear him activating the dispenser. He rummaged around a little longer than usual. But the surge of adrenaline caused by his inquiry had stroked the pounding in my head to new highs, and I was too distracted trying not to let that show to notice. 

Which was why, when the General sat down a steaming cup on the table next to me and moved to stroke my hair way from my neck, I flinched violently. His hand simply clammed down on my shoulder, though, holding me in place as he pressed a defuser gun against my neck and pulled the trigger. 

I edged away as soon as he let go, pressing my hand against a spot on my neck from which a cool sensation was now spreading. At first, I was too scared to speak up, as the General returned to the counter. I heard a compartment close, and when he came back to pick up his tea, the defuser gun had disappeared. Just when I had gathered the courage to ask what he had injected me with, Hux beat me to it. 

"Symoxin," he said, sitting down on the other couch, tea in hand. As if I had any idea what the fuck that was. Perhaps my worries showed on my face because he continued. "It's a common pain killer. It will take a few moments to take effect. And I doubled the dose to account for your heightened metabolism, so there might be some side effects. Nothing you need worry about." 

_Uh-huh._ I thought, not at all not worried. 

"Thank you?" I said—asked, really—and then, "side effects?" 

The General smirked. 

"In high dosages, Symoxin can cause sleepiness, euphoria, memory loss. I'm sure it's nothing more than what you would have experienced at one of Gorat's…revels," he said. There was something eerily sardonic in his voice. 

But he wasn't wrong. 

I wasn't inexperienced when it came to drugs like Kryll or other forms of Spice. Not even to having no say in taking them. And, yes, the sensations spreading through my body, the slight tingle in my limbs, it all felt familiar. This was why, when the pain in my head started to ease back to a bearable level, I decided to simply surrender. 

For a while I just sat there, my head leaning against the back of the couch and my legs pulled up under me. While I enjoyed the feeling of my body being relaxed by the drugs, I thought back to the times Taka had drugged me. And I wondered… 

Then Hux got up and, as he leaned over me, his hand brushed my hair away from my face in a purposeful gesture. He was clearly checking to see if my skin color had returned to a more healthy shade. But I managed to convince myself he was being tender. 

Okay, so I was definitely high. 

"Come," he said, announcing in his usual, firm tone that it was time for bed. As he turned, I boldly reached out and caught his hand, stopping him in his tracks. I smiled up at him drunkenly as he looked down. His look was inquisitive, rather than annoyed, and I found more courage. 

"I'm not going to carry you," he said, matter-of-factly, but in my state, it only made me smile wider. 

"No, I know…" I said and used his hand to pull myself up. The General allowed it, but only until I was on my feet, then he freed his hand from mine—not roughly, but firmly—and turned toward the bedroom. I felt slightly discouraged, yet was far from ready to give up on my idea. I followed him in and, instead of retreating to my side of the bed, I slunk up next to him, watching as he sat down and then removed his comlink, placing it neatly on the bystand. 

Hux tensed slightly, as my hand found his shoulder, and more when I used it for support as I lowered myself onto my knees in front of him. Carefully, I took hold of his calf to slip his foot out of its slipper. 

"What are you doing?" he asked. He didn't exactly sound indulging…but neither did his voice have that sharp edge that warned me when I was going to far—perhaps he felt my drugged state earned me a bit more leniency. I thought it was rather obvious what I was doing, so I simply hummed as I slid the second foot out of its slipper. So far, the General had allowed me my way. 

I worried I might lose my resolve if I had to meet his icy stare, so I kept my eyes downcast under heavy lids, as I slowly pushed myself up again, my hands on his knees. I heard him take a sharp breath. Felt it, too, as my hands were now traveling up his chest. I positioned myself to straddle his lap, pulling my loose shift up to give my legs enough freedom to move. 

"Lamees, stop." Hux sounded sterner now, and I could feel his growing discomfort. But something else, also, and so I decided to push my luck. 

"Why?" I asked against his ear, as I nuzzled his neck, my breath hot against his throat. 

His hand came up toward the remote of my collar, still attached to his shirt. The gesture was probably meant as a warning, but my hand reached it first, and I placed my palm flat against it. When his fingers couldn't reach the little piece of metal, they closed around my arm instead, angrily pressing into a pressure point at my wrist. The pain felt weird to my fogged brain. As if it were radiating from my arm, echoing through my chest. It made me squirm a little, and a hum turned into a soft moan in my throat. But my hand didn't give up the remote. 

"I said stop." His voice was cold, but also slightly breathless. 

"Please, Hux," I whispered. I refused to move my hand, sliding myself against him instead. His other hand closed on my hip, and, for a moment, I was worried he'd push me off…but I could feel his indecision and pressed on. 

"Just touch me," I begged softly as I ran my free hand up the back of his neck and into his hair. "Please." The pressure on my wrist loosened into something bearable. 

"You're out of your mind," he said softly.

"Hmm," I hummed in answer. "But, if I won't remember, what does it matter?" I asked. For a few heartbeats, I waited, nuzzling his neck. Then, rather suddenly, I felt his desire win over his reserve, and his hand slid from my arm to my breast. 

Still weary of the possibility of Hux shoving me off, I carefully took his face in my hands and tilted my head to kiss him. The irony that he had fucked me twice already, and yet this was our first kiss wasn't lost on me as our lips met. I went slow, unconsciously wetting my lips before letting them ghost over his. He was still tense, while I, in my inebriated state, felt relaxed, and ready to melt. 

Finally, when my tongue darted out to press against his lips, I felt him release a breath I hadn't realized he was holding and, as he pulled me closer, his mouth opened for me. Wasting no time, I pushed deeper, seeking his taste, which was slightly bitter from his tea and intoxicating to my heightened senses. 

Feeling him tuck on my shift, I lifted my arms over my head and broke away from his mouth, just long enough for him to pull the fabric off of me before taking his head into my hands and going back to kissing him. _This is what I was made for_ , I thought, as his hands stroked over my heated skin, pressing against the firmness of my body. 

I grabbed fists full of his shirt and felt his hunger growing in my mind, just like I felt his erection growing against my thigh. As I had hoped, whatever inhibitions had held him back the previous nights were forgotten, as Hux allowed me to pull off his shirt. Then his hands took hold of my hips, and he easily positioned me on the bed. 

His skin was pale in the still fully lit room, as he hovered over me for a moment, before languidly tracing his lips down from my collarbone to my breast. My own skin must have been flushed a deeper shade of pink from the blood racing through my veins. But I didn't care, moaning and aching my back wantonly instead, as his mouth closed over my nipple. 

He took hold of my other breast, rolling the little bud he found between his fingers and I ran my hand through his hair and down his neck, moaning in appreciation of finally, _finally_ being touched again. But, of course, I wanted more…wanted to feel his nimble fingers rubbing and squeezing against my aching clit. So, I unceremoniously pushed down my panties, using my hands as far as I could reach and my feet to brush them off the rest of the way. Then, when after a second or two Hux still hadn't gotten the hint, I took hold of his hand to guide it down where I really wanted it, need it. 

Maybe, if it hadn't been for the drugs, I would not have been so bold. But after several frustrating days—and nights—I just couldn't be bothered to wait any longer. Lucky for me, the General didn't seem to mind, instead applying the same ruthless efficiency to this task as everything else he did. His tongue and fingers moved in unison, one flicking over my nipple, the other rubbing over my clit. I made my contentment known with a loud moan and by carefully skimming my nails down his back. I tried to press into him even more, seeking firmer stimulation. But instead, I felt his mouth leave my breast, just as he slid two fingers into me. 

It felt so good that, for a moment, all I could do was close my eyes, throw my head back and lift my hips into his touch. His fingers weren't gentle, but I didn't want them to be. I wanted them to spread me open, to push and curl inside me, wanted the heel of his hand to rub against that small knot of nerves _just_ so. 

After a few blissful moments of chasing my own pleasure, I managed to take a look at Hux and was startled to find his gaze fixed on my face, drinking in my expression. The stare of his ice colored eyes was so intense, I couldn't help but squirm, heat spreading across my cheeks. Whatever had held him back the last few nights, I was now willing to bet that it hadn't been inexperience. And his hand continued to drive me insane, proving my point. 

Gasping short breaths, I tried to pull his head down for a kiss—anything to get this penetrating focus off my face—but it was a moot point. With his arm braced against the bed, I could probably have put my entire body weight into pulling him down, and he needn't have budged. Which was why, when my orgasm finally hit a few moments later, I was still thoroughly trapped underneath a pair of burning eyes, my hands laced through his hair, and my hips shamelessly riding out the wave of pleasure. To my endorphin flooded mind, this wave seemed to build forever, before it crashed through my body, making me tense and taking all coherent thought with it. 

For a whole five seconds, I experienced the luxury of thoughtless relaxation, the hand between my thighs at rest, yet applying pressure just so, causing a delicious sensation to spread up my spine. _Oh, he definitely knows what he is doing,_ was the first thought in my head, once thought became possible again. 

The second was dominated by his erection, which was pressing against my thigh. And then his eyes, which were still focused on my face. _Damn._ I didn't think I had ever seen eyes quite this color before—like chips of dirty ice. Or durasteel. 

Thankfully, this time when I tried to pull him down, he relented, his kiss deep and hungry. Hux pulled his hand free and wiped his fingers on the sheets, which I didn't take personally. Especially as his hand then curled into my hair, pulling me closer into the kiss. 

Feeling bold, I pushed off the bed and straddled his hips, a practiced motion to me, my mouth never leaving his lips. The change in position came with a rush of feeling in control, and I was glad he allowed it. I ground my soaking folds into the bulge of his slacks, probably making a mess, but I didn't mind. And neither seemed he to, as his hands gripped my hips, pressing me onto him. 

"Wait," he said, as his hands left me to push down his slacks. There was a moment of confused struggle, as Hux worked to rid himself of the offending garment, and I tried to get out of the way. I might have giggled and he might have huffed, but I honestly don't remember. 

What I do remember is the delicious feeling of sinking down on his cock. The sweet stretch and the way he went in easily this time, pushing past my swollen lips until his tip kissed my cervix. Hux settled against the mattress, and I straightened up, letting my weight rest on him before I started moving my hips in slow circles, just enough to enjoy the feeling of being full. I let my head fall back, and my walls grip him tightly. His hands were back on my hips, and I heard him groan as I bore down on him. 

"Damn it, woman. Move!" He bit out, and I did. I braced my hands against his chest as I slid up and down on his length, and despite his tight grip on my hips, the General allowed me to set the pace. I could feel he was getting close, which filled me with a sense of pride and mirrored lust. 

I don't know if it was that, or the buzz of the drugs, or simply the satisfaction of finally getting the gratification I had yearned for, but I was getting close again as well. My hand sneaked down to where we were joined to rub over my clit. But, to my surprise, Hux gently nudged it aside, his thumb replacing my fingers on that oh so sensitive spot. 

My head fell back, and my eyes fluttered closed as I moaned. Small shocks were racing through me like sparks, and it only took a few seconds before my body went rigid. I felt a wave of power-drunken triumph wash through the General as I came, followed by the pleasure of his own climax. He strained, tensed, and groaned and I could feel the familiar warmth erupting inside me. 

Too tired to think straight, I let myself fall forward and stretched out, feeling his softening cock slip out of me as I settled against his chest. I just wanted to curl up and rest, the comfortable haze the dugs and two orgasms had left me in demanding sleep. But we were still on top of the covers, with the room brightly lit and, as sweat started to dry on my skin, I was reminded of how cold space could be. 

Hux seemed to be thinking along the same lines because a few moments after his breath had evened out, I could feel him shift underneath me. With surprising gentleness, he maneuvered me off of him so he could get up, and I felt him tuck on the covers. I knew I'd have to move if I wanted to get into bed properly, of course, and an impatient exhale from the General told me I was pushing my luck by stalling. 

Gracefully, I rolled over to the other side and plonked off the bed. There was a snort of derision at my misestimation of available space—probably the most amused noise I had heard Hux make, yet—as he drew back the covers and climbed back in. Stifling a groan, I followed, eager to get back to the warmth of his body. 

I was too tired, or maybe too drugged, to be surprised when he allowed me to snuggle up against him, even, after a moment, sneaking an arm around me to pull me closer. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Liked it? Do me a huge favor: Go read at least one more fanfic today (form anyone, I'm not fishing for myself here) and, if you like it even a little bit, make sure you leave Kudos, maybe even a review if you can think of something nice or at least something productive to say.  
> Just a simple 'Wow, I really liked this' can mean so much to the writers. ❤︎


	16. Power

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lamees ponders a possibly fatal mistake, wondering if she'll be punished.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This fucking chapter, guys. I'm not kidding. I almost gave up on the whole thing.   
> Thanks to Cari and Lisa for pulling me through the 'I want to write sex! Any other form of character interaction is too fucking hard!!' phase I went through over the last two weeks. <_>

I awoke slowly to a buzzing and someone steering next to me on the bed. Feeling way too content to care, I turned away from the sound and hid my face in the pillow as the lights came on. Only then did I slowly become aware of why it felt like this had been my first good night's rest in forever…and I froze. Suddenly wide awake, I didn't dare move, but Hux had already gone off into the fresher.

Last night came back to me in bits and pieces, and I sheepishly peeked under the covers. Yep, naked. So, what I remembered wasn't just some sexed-up dream my frustrated libido had cooked up. I desperately began to try and fish more memory fragments out of my brain. I remembered having a headache and the General injecting me with something that had made me feel, hm, high.

And after?

I groaned softly, pressing my blushing face deeper into the pillow. It wasn't that I was embarrassed about the sex—why would I be?

But, given Hux's open disdain for what had so far been my one purpose in life and how he had chosen to ignore everything he'd been doing to me during the night? Maybe climbing on top of him, as satisfying as it had been in the short term, hadn't been such a healthy idea. Fuck me if it hadn't been worth it, though, just a tiny bit.

I ran the memories through my head, and as they became more distinct, a little detail suddenly struck me so unexpectedly that I sat up in shock. The remote! My palm on the small metal square, blocking it from his hand.

My heart was racing as I remembered his threat: _If you ever so much as reach for it, it will be the end of you._

The fresher door hissed open and, in a panic, I threw myself back down on the mattress, pulling the covers with me, and silently praying to whoever might be listening that the General would just _go_. Maybe, just maybe, he'd keep on pretending that what happened between us at night…didn't happen. And hadn't he said that the stuff he'd drugged me with could cause memory loss? Perhaps, if I pretended I didn't remember what I'd done, he wouldn't punish me for it?

Hux had come out of the fresher, but for a moment, there was silence. Was he looking at me? Contemplating what to do with me? There was a rustling of fabric before the door hissed again. I didn't dare look to see what was going on, just squeezed my eyes shut and waited. When the door closed a second time, I could hear the General purposely stride through the room, then the lights were turned off, and the louder, pressurized door to his chambers opened and closed. He was gone.

For a while, I lay there in the dark, and as the minutes passed and it seemed more and more likely that I was safe, at least for now, my fear and tension melted into heavy, gut-wrenching sobs.

———

I wasn't sure how long it took me to cry myself out, but it was some time before I found the strength to pull myself out of bed and padded, naked, into the shower. Once I was dressed and wandered into the living area, I realized that I had missed breakfast and cursed. It wasn't that I was hungry—my stomach felt like it was filled with rocks. It was that the last thing I needed was to draw unwanted attention by not keeping up my side of the deal with Hux.

But since there was nothing I could do about it now, I tried to sit down and read. Only, I was too tense to find a comfortable position on the couch, so I got up and stretched, grateful for the distraction when the dispenser chimed. I gave it my best to have a go at the meal, managed to force maybe half of it into my roiling stomach, cleared everything away, and, since I was already standing there, browsed through the dispenser's menu. Most of the dishes there didn't mean anything to me, though. And some didn't even have proper names but seemed to go by some form of number code.

I spent some time picking out meals, trying hard not to think about how this might be fruitless. The whole point was to try and distract myself from the fact that after last night, the General might decide to get rid of me. And planing for the future, even in as pathetic and meager a way as was available to me right now, was comforting.

Just as I had put together a few meals, there was a deep rumble that seemed to travel through the whole ship, then the lights flickered and went out. I was left in that complete darkness of space I so hated, but luckily only for a moment. Then, one by one, the lights came back to life. Not sure what was going on, I froze and waited for something else to happen. But nothing did.

When I turned my attention back to the dispenser menu, I saw that all my efforts had been erased during what had evidently been a momentary power failure. _Great._

But at least that way, I could start anew, which kept me busy for a few more minutes. Then I tried to go back to reading. Only, after I was able to distract myself for a bit, thoughts of what might happen to me once the General came back became even more unbearable. I got up and started pacing while I mulled things over in my head. It wasn't just the thing about the remote…there was the possibility, especially considering what I knew about Hux so far, that he might be so disgusted by my boldness that he'd have to get rid of me. Perhaps my wanton behavior would be just the excuse he'd need to send me to the barracks.

This was how I spent the rest of the day: pacing and going through all the reasons the General might now have to throw me out; thinking about what would happen to me if he did; trying to come up with different ways I might avoid punishment. Once or twice, I might have curled up on the couch and cried for a bit.

The dispenser chimed two more times, and two more times, I tried to force down as much food as I could, thankful for the little diversion it offered. It was getting very late now, and the General still hadn't returned. Worrying all day had taken its toll, and I was feeling bone-tired. But the thought of Hux coming back and finding me in his bed felt wronger than ever.

———

You'd think after yesterday, I had learned my lesson, but I fell asleep on the couch anyway.

Luckily there was no headache when I woke up. But I was still a little confused because one, I was now surrounded by darkness and, two, as I stretched, I realized I was also covered by a blanket. Still on the hard couch, though, as my back grudgingly informed me.

For a moment I pondered what had happened, but it wasn't that hard to figure out: Since, in four days, no-one besides the cleaning droids had entered Hux's chambers, the General must simply have returned, late, and gone straight to bed, turning off the lights as any sane person would. After taking the time to 'tug me in,' so to speak. _Huh_.

And there was another problem: I had to use the fresher. I tried to ignore the urge out of pure spite. But it got more and more insistent, and after a few minutes, I had to admit defeat to the fact that I'd have to get up and feel my way through the dark—turning on the lights would be a sure way to wake Hux and therefore not an option.

Carefully, I got up and tiptoed over to the bedroom, following the soft glow of the console light from Hux's bystand. Unfortunately, while the fresher doors closed automatically, they had to be activated to open—imagine the possibility for embarrassment otherwise—and as soon as I had fumbled around and found the corresponding switch, their hiss was followed by the lights coming on in the small space beyond. I quickly darted inside, hoping neither the noise, nor the sudden brightness had woken the General.

But once I was done and, after washing up, stepped out of the fresher, I saw that I had had no such luck: Hux was sitting upright against the headboard, reading a datapad. Above him on the wall, a light panel was lit, bathing the room in a glow much softer than the overhead lights usually did. I felt a bit foolish for not having figured out that was what the white, milky glass was for until now.

"I'm sorry I woke you," I said timidly, lingering in the doorway.

"We can't all sleep like the dead," was his dry response, and then, just as I dared hope I might be allowed to slink back to my couch in peace, he looked up from the pad and indicated the space next to him. "Come."

 _Gods_ , I was starting to hate that word.

Rounding the bed, I reluctantly sat down, slipped off my shoes and slid along until I, too, was leaning with my back against the headboard. Except that I was still sitting atop the covers and as far away from Hux as the width of the bed would allow.

The General made a soft, scoffing sound. "Careful you don't slide off again."

If I had been a little less terrified, I would probably have snorted in amusement. Instead, it occurred to me that this might be a good moment to pretend I didn't have a clue about what had happened the night before.

"Please don't put me in that chair," I blurted out, instead. _So much for faking memory-loss_ , I thought, and instant regret set in as the General's emotions were flooded with annoyance.

"What chair? What are talking abou—Ah, I see." His gaze had followed my eyes to the remote on his shirt, and understanding had flitted across his face. "So much for 'if I won't remember, what does it matter'"

I flinched a little, shook my head, and meekly said, "I'm sorry."

"You should be." His tone was firm but not menacing. "But at least you're not lying. I was half expecting you would try and sell me the idea that the Symoxin wiped the whole thing from your mind."

"You were the one who said it had memory-loss as a side effect," I defended myself sullenly.

"It can, sometimes. In humans. But not in all lesser species, apparently."

"Did you look that up today?" I asked, but he shot me a warning look that shut me up.

Pulling my legs against my chest, I wiggled my bare feet under the covers to keep them warm. But nothing else, and I noticed Hux noticing.

"Was that what kept you pacing all day? The thought that I might have you dragged off and tortured to death?" The almost indifferent way he spoke about it made me shiver. It wasn't like I didn't remember his threat; there was no need to repeat it. Then I realized something.

"How do you know—" but that was as far as I got before I was impatiently interrupted.

"Answer my question, Lamees."

"Yes," I admitted.

"Good," he said, and for a moment I thought he'd gone back to reading, but then he continued. "I decided to waive punishment, just this once."

"On account of me fucking your brains out?" It had been an innocent attempt at being funny, but anger instantly flared through Hux. I started, hastily trying to apologize. Only, his hand was quicker, and before I got so much as a 'sorry' through my teeth, a shock bit into my neck.

I winced, sucked in a breath, and since I could feel the General glaring at me still, I glumly kept my eyes on the covers and my mouth shut. His stare lasted a few more seconds, and I began to fear he'd do worse. But then his anger ebbed, and a moment later, he turned his attention back to his datapad.

I wasn't sure how long I had slept for on the couch, but judging from how my eyelids soon began to drop, it hadn't been long. And I could feel that the General was tired, too, even noticed him rubbing his eyes a few times. Dreading what would happen once he shut off the lights, I gathered my courage and spoke.

"May I ask a question?" My plan was mostly to stall. But I also hoped that by talking, I'd manage to form more of a connection with Hux. Other than in worded threats, the General hadn't really been cruel to me, not outright. And he seemed to have at least some interest in keeping me alive. Gently reminding him that I was a sentient, emotional being might be my best chance of keeping it that way.

Ignoring my own nervousness, I tried to get a feel for his emotions. There was…something. I wasn't sure if it was annoyance or something else. Maybe it was annoyance _mixed_ with something else. Apprehension perhaps?

"What happened today? Around midday?" I tried, timidly.

There was the risk that whatever it had been, had caused him trouble—I was sure it was the reason he'd come in so late—and darkening his mood wasn't my goal. But it was also the only thing I could think about to ask. Especially after his reaction to my quip just now had made it clear fucking was not a safe topic. Luckily, while the annoyance remained at the from of his emotions, that other nagging thing retreated from Hux's mind. Perhaps he had worried I would be foolish enough to bring the sex up again, after all.

"There was a minor explosion in the reactor unit, caused by a leaking isotope well. Nothing you need to worry about."

I couldn't even have put into words how very much the state of this gigantic ship had _not_ been on the list of things I had worried about today.

"There was a power failure."

"Yes, there was a power failure. Which, I'm sure, was a lot less inconvenient for you in here than it was for the warrant officers who had to spent eight hours rebooting systems on both bridges."

Now, that emotion was clear: exasperation. As if I had just made the most obvious, useless observation in the galaxy…when that power failure had been the only thing out of the ordinary to happen to me in four days. Well, the only thing I had hoped it'd be safe to talk about anyway.

"Are you going to perch there like a clawbird all night?" the General asked testily as he put down his datapad on the bystand.

I shrugged, hoping against hope that he wouldn't order me under the covers.

But he just scoffed, said, "Fine, suit yourself," and turned off the lights. The mattress shifted under me as Hux settled down to sleep. His back was to me, I judged, but given how previous nights had gone, that didn't mean much. In the darkness, it became even harder not to let my eyes fall closed, though. And since I doubted 'suit yourself' included the option to return to the couch, I reluctantly slid between the sheets. But only once I was sure Hux was asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My description of what a shock from the collar feels like is based on my experience with the [Tazapper](https://www.amazon.com/The-Kink-Shop-Original-Tazapper/dp/B07RH99HTQ) in BDSM play, by the way. It's a nice gadget, and while it doesn't actually hurt, (kinda depending on what body part it's used on,) the sheer size and the loud noise the Tazapper makes make it a super effective scene toy. -_^
> 
> [There might not be an update on Friday, sorry. A very good friend of mine passed away on Saturday and because Mi_ner_va and Cari have motivated me to insert another Interlude and give you an idea about what Hux has been thinking, and because that chapter isn't done yet, I'm not sure I'll be able to post in time.]  
> 


	17. Interlude 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux is thinking about what he might gain from Lamees when he's rudely interrupted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is for [Mi_ner_va](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Mi_ner_va) who kept asking for another Interlude and for [Cari](http://archiveofourown.org/users/CariSilver/), who kicked my self-conscious ass into actually writing one.

General Hux was overseeing the last of the telemetry realignments made necessary by the short power-outage from yesterday. The whole thing had been a horrible mess. While several redundancies were placed inside the power grid, explicitly designed to prevent ship-wide power-surges and failures, the maintenance work on the _Finalizer_ 's generator had forced the engineers to bypass most of those. Only due to this circumstance and some very unfortunate timing, had it been possible for one, relatively small explosion on the engineering deck to take out power to both bridges at once. And to keep the backup generators from coming online fast enough to prevent several vital systems from resetting. Or so the team of engineers responsible had sworn to him, after.

Hux would have gladly thrown them all into a termination chamber. But, seeing as they were, to a man, officers who had served on his ship for years, he had found it more prudent to stay his hand. Executing them would only bring him new ones, transferred from one of the destroyers lost at Crait, or perhaps the _Supremacy_ itself. And right now, new personnel in critical positions, even if it was just the corps of engineers, was something he sought to avoid.

And so, he had soldiered through the two dreadful days it had cost to repair the damage done without the satisfying diversion of dealing out capital punishment. At least there had been little time left to ponder how to deal with the other complication fate had gifted him with: the girl in his chambers. But now that nearly all the necessary reboots and realignments were dealt with, he'd have to decide what to do about her.

True, he had complicated things when he had failed to resist the pull of her pheromones. It had not been quite like that when he had told her that she would spend the night at his side, or else he would not have risked it. Sex with her had not been his goal, only finding better rest. But something in her body chemistry must have changed during the night, perhaps brought on by sleep. And when he woke up with several hours of possible rest yet to be had but knowing he would be unable to go back to sleep until he had scratched the itch she had caused in him, he had, well, scratched. Not that he was proud of it, but, in the end, wasn't that what she had been created for?

If he had hurt her, doing so should not even be his concern. Surely she had endured worse from others. Nor had she fought him or ever asked him to stop, he knew that for a certainty. In fact, Hux remembered clearly how her hands had fisted in his clothes, how she had pressed up against him. The soft noises she had made…and how they had changed in pitch as things had progressed. Back then, he had not sought to drag matters out, considering it a courtesy to her, and a practical matter of not wasting too much time on satisfying baser urges. His goal had not been to feign affection, after all, so why bother with niceties? There had simply been something that had kept him from getting the rest he required, and he had dealt with it swiftly and efficiently. She was a slave, for Edge's sake, he should not feel obliged to take her thoughts on the matter into consideration.

Nevertheless, he did. Because he could not wholly deny the rush he had felt at her soft moans, at her legs draped over his, urging him on. And then there had been the sting he had felt when, right after, she ran off into the fresher. Clearly, she could not wait to wash herself of him. So, she had played the whore; but only for as long as it was strictly necessary. Or so he had thought, and made his peace with it.

Until the thing with the Symoxin. How easily a small dose of drugs had changed her demeanor from timid and passive, into daring, almost demanding. Or, perhaps 'demanding' was not the right word, Hux thought wistfully, since she had literally _begged_ him to touch her: Desperate, more like.

Yet, maybe it had not been that the drugs had pulled down her inhibitions, so much as she had hoped the prospect of her not remembering would pull down his. And, curse it, she might have had a point. Those words she had whispered— _'if I won't remember, what does it matter'_ —they had been exactly the thing it had needed to break his resolve. Hux did not credit her with enough intelligence to have figured that out in advance; thought it had most likely happened by chance, instead. But if he was wrong, he better be more careful around her.

He had, just as she had so impertinently guessed, looked up the common side-effects of Symoxin in lesser species yesterday, and found that Zeltrons did indeed rarely suffer so much as a memory lapse from it. There were other substances at hand he had found, which could cause complete memory loss, or the breakdown of inhibitions, or both if he so desired. Hux had considered all those and quickly realized it was not what he really wanted. But what did he want?

In the past, his sexual encounters had, for the most part, been meaningless dalliances. In his youth, he had had a few of those, in an attempt to spite his father. But all it had left him with was a deep self-loathing at the realization that, instead of the desired sense of rebellion, they had left him with a sense of repeating the man's mistakes. They had all left a foul after taste.

Except for _her_. But he refused to think about that, right now. Thinks between Jocasta and him had been brought to an end. And, as much as he had hope that one day, he'd been in a position to rekindle their relationship—or fate would for once gift instead of torment him and her father would meet a sudden, _unfortunate_ end—after Snoke's death and Ren's rise as new Supreme Leader, this seemed less likely than ever. No use dwelling on it.

So, why not use the girl for a meaningless diversion, the way he had used other women?

He'd had that thought yesterday, during the morning, as well. But then the power failure had happened, and after he had received report of what was going on and a preliminary damage assessment had been done, it had been necessary to check on the girl. All officer's quarters had fail-safes build into their doors, which caused them to unlock during a loss of power, as a safety measure. Had the girl realized this, she might have tried to flee his chambers, even if she had nowhere to go.

Instead, when he had activated the camera feed, he had found her pacing. He had concluded, wrongly, as it turned out, that it was regret over their sexual activities which kept her on her feet with anxiety. And once more, there had been that sting at being rejected, by a non-human whore of all people, just as there had been when she had fled into the fresher in such haste.

Paired with the anger and frustration that day had brought, Hux had been in an exceptionally foul mood by the time he managed to return to his chambers, late at the end of the last shift. Her dread, in turn, had left his chambers filled with her pheromones and, startled, he had taken a deep breath. That did not help his physical reaction, of course. Looking around, it had taken him a moment to find her, cuddled up and hidden by the back of the couch as she was. It spoke to her naive nature that she always chose the sofa which had its back to the door.

She looked even younger when she was asleep. Her purchase records listed her birth year as 12 ABY, so she was only a little over a decade younger than himself. But with her petit frame curled into itself, and her hands tugged under her chin, he might have mistaken her for a teenager, maybe even a child. This somewhat dampened the urge to pull her up and into his bed—roughly if he had to—which her pheromones had steered up. And it had been a long day that had left him bone-tired, so better not waste the few hours of rest he could afford.

Just as he had entered his bedroom, discarding his belt and undoing his uniform jacket, he had heard the girl shift. He looked back to see if she had woken, but all she had done was curl up even tighter, pulling her knees up against her chest. Somehow that had reminded him of her naturally elevated body temperature and the heat of Iridan in which she had spent most of her life. So, in an onset of sentimental weakness, he had retrieved her blanket from its compartment and covered her with it, telling himself he was only trying to prevent her from getting sick—when it was more likely that a part of him had hoped the procedure would wake her after all. Then he had taken a quick shower and retired to bed.

By the time the fresher doors had woken him a few hours later, both his anger and his lust for her had fortunately receded to a controllable level, replaced mainly by weariness. He had taken the chance to check on a few status reports, and, once the girl had reemerged, made it clear he expected her to rejoin him in his bed. And her apparent reluctance at that had been more irritating than he was comfortable to admit. Especially since his intention was not to touch her, but to ensure he'd go back to sleep more easily.

Only, he had not yet realized that it was fear of punishment that had kept her anxious and made her keep her distance, not disgust at what they had done the night before. And then, just as her unexpected confession had left him appeased enough to show leniency, her insolent quip had brought home the fact that she still needed reminding of her place.

Hux _almost_ smiled to himself. It had annoyed him last night, even angered him, but in retrospect? He had to admit the girl's resistance to being cowed completely was not entirely displeasing. He could not allow it to get out of hand, of course. But the fact that she was not just an empty shell, broken down to the point of absolute compliance, made her more interesting. No wonder Gorat had chosen to preserve her spirit, like he had ensured the flawlessness of her skin. Mind and body, both occasionally abused, Hux suspected, but neither ever damaged beyond repair.

So far, she had shied away from him mostly after he had had to punish her for something. Reasonable to assume a little leniency and a bit of patience would persuade her to come to him willingly again. Honey caught more flies than vinegar, after all.

"Sir?"

Realizing that he had been standing there, staring blankly at the same screen for several minutes, musing, Hux first started at being addressed and then berated himself angrily. This was no time to show weakness.

"What?" he snapped back irritably, covering up the fact that he had been caught off-guard.

"Supreme Leader Ren is making contact from the _Steadfast_ , sir."

"Don't you dare open that call here!" he hissed, after taking two steps toward the communications officer, to ensure as few people as possible would hear. "Put him through to my—" _blast it, the girl!_ "—ready-room! Put him through to the ready-room."

As much as Hux loathed having to talk to Ren, this call was not unexpected: After it became clear that the incident from yesterday would add another two or three days to the maintenance work on the _Finalizer_ , he had been able to convince General Engell to take a shuttle and expedite her meeting with the Supreme Leader. Consequently, he had anticipated that Ren would contact him soon, perhaps to discuss the terms he had reached with Gorat, but definitely to whine about the delay caused by circumstances wholly out of Hux's control.

Striding across the bridge as quickly as dignity would allow, Hux reached the ready-room with a touch of relief since he was sure whatever Ren had to say to him was not going to be something he'd enjoy other bridge officers overhearing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if this chapter ended a bit abruptly, I know some of you were expecting a convo between Hux and Ren. But there's a reason (and it's not just that I was super busy this week, nor that I checked out of writing Ren—well, maybe a little more of the latter than I'd like to admit. ^_^')
> 
> _If_ you're interested enough to run the name Jocasta through Wookieepedia, you will find [Jocasta Nu](https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Jocasta_Nu), a Jedi Master from around the Clone Wars and after. She was the Jedi Archives' chief librarian, and she is _not_ who Hux is thinking about here. -_^


	18. Purpose (E)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Hux returns to his chambers in a very foul mood, Lamees tries her best not to become an outlet for his frustrations. (Rated E for sexual content.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Huge thank you to [ CariSilver](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CariSilver) for editing and to all the people who've subscribed, left kudos, and reviews! Nothing keeps me more motivated ❤︎

I had woken that morning to the buzzing of Hux's alarm and realized that, for the first time, I had spent an entire night in the General's bed without him touching me.

Following his usual routine, Hux had gotten up and gone into the fresher, leaving me alone to pull the covers over my head and go back to sleep. The next time I woke up was because the dispenser had chimed, and I hurried out of bed to make sure I wouldn't miss breakfast again. After that, I spent the day reading and, while I began to feel a little bored at times and maybe a touch claustrophobic, at least my anxiety from the day before had eased.

By the end of the fourth shift, a few minutes before I expected the dispenser to deliver my last meal of the day, the main door suddenly hissed open. I was a bit startled by the noise since Hux had come in much later the past two days. But that was little compared to the disquiet that gripped me as the General stepped into the room. I didn't know what was going on, but something had made him very, very angry. It wasn't just on his pinched face: I could literally feel it come off of him in waves.

I had considered greeting him, but now I thought it might be better to just let him disappear into the fresher to shower and hope he'd calm down a bit. Only, he didn't go to the fresher. All he did was peel off his gloves and step toward where I was sitting in my usual spot on the couch.

"Come," he said to me as he threw his gloves down on the low table, and for a second, my heartbeat doubled because I thought he was talking about going into the bedroom. But he moved into the kitchenette instead, where he pushed a few buttons on the dispenser and produced two meals. Warily, I approached the table with the benches where Hux and I had eaten before, and where he was now laying out the food. I had to hand it to him: besides that pinched expression on his face, there was barely any indication that he was angered. But my empathy told a very different story, and tension tied my stomach into knots.

"You're back earlier today," I said as I slid onto the bench facing him. He looked up at me for a second but didn't respond, so I tried again. "Does that mean things are back to normal after what happened yesterday?"

"I don't see how that is any of your concern," he snapped. I decided it might be better to stay quiet for a while, but after a moment of eating in silence, Hux took a breath and answered my question after all. "The damage has been repaired. A few systems needed readjusting—nothing you'd understand, I suppose. A day and a half added to two weeks of maintenance work shouldn't make that much difference. But Supreme Leader Ren disagrees, of course."

"Supreme Leader?" I asked, a little confused at the venom in Hux's voice when he had said the title, and the look Hux gave me made me lower my eyes and mutter, "I'm sorry. I don't know much about the First Order…"

"No, you don't. Suffice it to say that Ren taking over the position is a recent development and not one I'm particularly pleased with."

 _No kidding_ , I thought, still impressed by the difference of outward calmness and inner turmoil I could see and sense in Hux.

"We heard stories about something…" Maybe it wasn't the best moment to ask, but this question had been on my mind ever since I had grasped the size of the ship we were on, and with it, the scope of power wielded by the First Order. "Taka said the First Order destroyed several planets, just a few months ago?" I half expected Hux to scoff at me for voicing such a ridiculous idea as several planets being blown up at the same time. But I was wrong.

"The Hosnian Cataclysm." He nodded, almost casually, as if it were the most normal thing in the world. "Yes, that system was wiped out. One swift strike to obliterate both the political leadership and the military fleet of the Republic. It marked the day the First Order finally stepped out of the shadows. But seeing as, up to that point, great efforts were taken to mask our true power, you can hardly be blamed for your ignorance."

I felt the blood drain from my face. A whole system? Those stories had been true? How many lives had that cost? Trying not to shudder too visibly, I looked back down on my plate, already knowing that I wouldn't be able to force down another bite. Luckily I had been almost done anyway. Hux seemed to sense my loss of appetite, and there was an eery look of satisfaction on his face when, a moment after I had put down my fork, he motioned for me to clear the table.

"Put these away. And get me a Train tea," he ordered and I did. When I put down the mug in front of him, I hoped I'd be able to slip away into the sitting area, but something in the look the General gave me made me slide back into my seat on the bench. I sat there awkwardly while he kept staring at me, and, after what must have been a full minute, I finally broke under his gaze.

"Please stop," I said, surprised at how hoarse my voice sounded.

"Stop what?"

"Staring at me."

"Why?"

 _Because you're freaking me the fuck out._ I softly cleared my throat.

"It feels…" I was searching for the right word, "invasive."

"Invasive?" he repeated with a note of derision in his voice and a hint of disbelief in his mood. "You meekly roll over at night, but feel I'm being _invasive_ when I'm looking at you during the day?"

Now it was my turn to stare. Glare, actually. And while meeting his cold eyes, I suddenly felt the urge to scratch them out.

"Fuck you," I hissed, and the only thing about the shock which followed that surprised me was how fast it happened. Well, and how much it hurt. Flinching, I pressed my hand against my neck, where my muscles felt like they'd been hit with a cane. The General had definitely upped the voltage.

But what pissed me off even more, was the fact that he'd been baiting me. And he hadn't bothered to be subtle about it, either: First the staring, then the condescending remark. And the fact that the remote must have been in his hand the entire time.

Frustrated, I slipped off the bench and started to head—I wasn't exactly sure where. All I knew was that I was so fed up with the General's piercing eyes and his demeaning provocations, that I was just about ready to climb down the laundry chute to get some space between Hux and me.

Unfortunately, I didn't even make it past the sitting area before the General barked a command.

"Lamees, stop!"

Out of fear of the collar, I obeyed, albeit with gritted teeth and my hands balled into fists.

"What?" I snapped, whipping back around. All that did was earn me another shock anyway, and flinching, I took hold of the back of a couch for support. Lucky for me, there were so many swearwords trying to find their way out of my mouth at once that, somehow, they all got stuck.

Hux approached me, and I wasn't sure if I felt more like prey being stalked or an unruly child about to be chastised. My heart was pounding, and my breath came in short gasps, and suddenly I was a little afraid of what that might mean for my pheromone production. I had experienced what men could do when they were this angry and got turned on at the same time, and they weren't my fondest memories. Hux hadn't touched me last night, and I had been grateful for it this morning. But that had mostly been because I didn't want to keep 'rolling over meekly' as he had put it. Not because I didn't want to have sex. In fact, when we had had sex the night before had been the most I had felt like myself since he had taken me away from Iridan, away from everything I had ever known. That thought surprised me a bit, but it was true.

And yet, the way Hux was coming at me now and with that fucking remote palmed in his hand? I could still feel his frustration. That outright fury which he had somehow managed to reign in while we were eating was back, too, and that was especially unfair because Hux himself had all but admitted that his foul mood wasn't my fault. If I could just channel all this into something else, find a way to redirect it, so I wouldn't end up withering on the floor from continued electroshocks…

Just as Hux reached me, I took two steps back and—quickly because I could see fury flare up in his eyes—I pulled my dress over my head and let it drop to the floor. That stopped him dead in his tracks.

"What are you doing?" he asked, and pure surprise dampened his rage. Taking heart in that, I closed the distance between us until our bodies were almost touching, carefully watching his reaction. For once, his eyes weren't focused on my face, his gaze lingering on my breasts instead, and I could see his chest rise and fall as he drew a few deep breaths. Reaching out, I traced my fingers over the silky fabric of his uniform, counting the seconds and waiting to see if Hux would use the collar to shock me or not. My heart was still racing, and I was hoping that this time, the pheromones would work in my favor. The cold of the room and the intensity of his gaze had caused my nipples to tighten and rise, and as I leaned into him, the sensation of the smooth fabric brushing against them made me sigh softly.

"This is what I am," I said lowly, "what I was created for. My purpose. You don't need to hurt me…"

"I wasn't—" but he stopped himself, and I could feel a bit more of his anger ebb away. Perhaps it had only now occurred to him that electrocuting someone with a shock collar counted as hurting, too?

"Please," I whispered, not exactly sure what I was begging him for, but shivering in delight as his hands skimmed against my sides.

"In the holding cell you said—" he started, but I interjected.

"I lied."

"Three nights ago, you couldn't wait to wash me off."

"Is that what you think?" I thought back a moment and shook my head. "That wasn't it. I just had to make myself come because you wouldn't." I couldn't help feeling a bit amused at the effect my candidness had on Hux: I could feel that he wanted to be disgusted, but it was also turning him on. "Please…don't do that to me again?"

To emphasize my point, I pushed myself into him even more, coming up on tiptoe so I could nuzzle against his neck, feel his breath in my hair, his chest pressing against my breasts…and I could feel his cock, too, stirring against my belly. But just as I was hopefully wondering how I'd get him out of his uniform, meaning the mechanics of it, I could feel that strange restrained of his flare up again. He took hold of my hands before they could do so much as figure out how to undo his belt, and I had to fight the urge to huff in frustration.

"Not here," he said, and I barely had enough time to think _What?_ before he pressed on. "Into the bedroom. And pick up your clothes, I'm sick of you leaving your things everywhere."

I was too confused—and too horny—to argue, so I let him turn me around, picked up my dress, and went into the bedroom.

"Put that away," he said, indicating the dress, so I quickly went into the fresher to dumb it down the laundry chute. And while I was at it, my panties came off and went down the chute, too.

When I came out, I was glad to see that Hux had gotten rid of his uniform jacket and boots, neither of them in sight. He turned to look at me, at my body, and for a moment, I let him, before I closed the distance between us and pressed against him again. I could hear his sharp intake of breath, his hands on my hips, pulling me closer as I stood on tiptoe to brush my lips against his.

A hand found its way into my hair, the other stroking firmly up my back, making me shiver and arch against him. I was waiting for his lips to open, for Hux to kiss me properly. But his grip in my hair tightened instead, pulling me away from him.

"Get on the bed," he said, and with satisfaction, I noticed the urgency in his voice.

Remembering how he'd enjoyed watching me come the other night, I lay back against the covers, and his gaze traveled over my body with such intensity, I could practically feel it prickling on my skin. His hands opened my legs, so his eyes could wander between my thighs, and I blushed a little, then moaned softly as he dragged his knuckles over my folds. I heard him sigh as he discovered what I already knew: I was soaking wet.

As he moved further up my body, I reached out to pull on his shirt, but his hands took hold of mine, pressing them firmly against the mattress.

"Stay," he said, and even though I squirmed a little, I tried my best to obey. Fisting my fingers into the covers and squeezing my eyes shut, I managed to hold on as he traced his lips along my neck, as his hands stroked along my sides, and even as his mouth ghosted over my breasts. But when his lips closed over one nipple, bathing it in heat, my fingers were suddenly buried in his silky hair, and my legs draped over his hips, urging him closer.

Strong hands took hold of my wrists, directing them back against the bed and holding them there. Then his mouth left my breast, cold air hitting my nipple, and caused me to whine softly in protest at the loss. I could feel his amusement as Hux shifted on top of me and opened my eyes to look at him. The expression on his face was so smug, I wanted to growl at him.

"Control yourself, will you," he said sternly. He felt more amused than cross to me, though, so I just closed my eyes again, squirming slightly to intensify the sensations of his body pressing me into the mattress, his hips between my legs, and the fabric of his clothes against my skin. 

"Why would I?" I asked, simply because it was the first thing that came into my head. My reward was a sharp nip of teeth against my shoulder, and I groaned as goosebumps erupted all over me.

"Because I'm telling you to," he said with absolute certainty, then let go of one of my wrists to grip my thigh. Reluctantly, I let my legs drop from his hips. Hux pulled away, but before I could voice my protest, I saw that it was only so he could rid himself of his remaining clothes. Then he moved back above me. I had only caught a glimpse at his cock, but I could feel the need in him pressing into my mind. And my heart threatened to hammer its way out of my chest.

While one of his hands kept my wrist caught against the bed, he used the other to guide his cock. I inhaled sharply as the head pressed against me, parting my lips, and groaned as it sank in deeper, my toes curling against the bed and my eyes fluttering shut. I was too focused on the sensation of being filled up to even notice that my free hand was holding on to Hux's shoulder until he was fully sunk in. With a soft growl, he took hold of it, this time pulling my arms over my head, before he started to move, thrusting slow and deep.

Being this passive during sex wasn't something I was used to. And, although I had to admit there was something enticing about feeling Hux holding me down, I wanted more. So, pressing my feet into the mattress for leverage, I arched my back, which caused my pelvic bone to press against his shaft and his against my clit.

He groaned and pressed his face into the crook of my neck, but _Gods_ , did the extra pressure fell good. Only, it looked like Hux wasn't going to allow me the initiative: pulling my wrists together, so he could hold them with one hand, he used the other to grab my thigh and pull my leg over his hips, taking away my leverage, so I could no longer press down on him. I huffed out in mock disappointment and then moaned as the new angle brought him in deeper. Not deep enough to hurt this time, but close.

And he didn't stop there, instead hocking his hand into the back of my knee and pulling my leg up further, far enough for my other leg to follow the pull automatically and drape over his waist. I felt the bones in my wrists grinding together as he pushed himself up so he could use his body weight to drive into me with more force. The way one of his hands held my arms above my head and the other pressed my leg up until my knee brushed against my chest had me pinned and unable to do anything but surrender. And surrender I did.

He hadn't said a word, but I started to whisper mindless pleas as he sped up, and that delicious pressure started to build inside me. I was so close, I begged him not to stop and didn't care if I sounded desperate, because I was. For a moment, I even managed to open my eyes to meet his gaze. But the intensity there drove me over the edge almost instantly, and my lids fluttered shut again as a wave of pleasure thundered through me. As my body went rigid and I unconsciously strained against his hold on me, I felt his cock push through my clenching muscles. Then his head was in the crook of my neck again, and he groaned. He drove in deep a few more times before he tensed and released, and I felt, more than heard him whisper something into my hair, which might have been a curse. But I was too busy with the pleasure of his orgasm racing through me to pay attention.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have a great week, guys! ❤︎


	19. Mothers (E)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux shares a few things about his past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tiny trigger warning for referenced sex between an adult and a minor, and mentioned rape.  
> Huge thank-yous to Cari and Lisa for the beta. ❤︎
> 
> My longest (and frankly, favorite) chapter, yet. I almost cut it in two, (one part plot and one part sex) just to keep you from getting spoiled. ~_^

I managed five whole days without getting myself into trouble.

Hux and I began to settle into a routine, where he would get up early, shower, and leave me to while away the day until his return. I quickly learned to let him shower and change in peace when he came in and not to climb on top of him without permission—a first for me, but I got used to it—and in turn, Hux made sure to return early enough to have dinner with me. Then we'd retreat to the sitting area, where he'd go over reports while I sat contentedly enjoying his company. There was something incredibly calming about Hux when his mind was focused on reading, so it usually didn't take long before I'd let my eyes fall shut and doze.

At some point, Hux would decide it was time for bed and take me to the bedroom, and it was then that I'd come alive. For years, Taka had taught me how to please him, be seductive and admiring, and actively meet his needs. But Hux was different. Authoritative and commanding, yet never cruel or vicious, and I quickly learned to trust him during sex, even when he used his physical superiority to hold me in place and his talented fingers to make me wither and squirm. I had begged him never to leave me sexually frustrated again and _fuck_ had he taken that to heart.

Outside the bedroom, however, there remained a bit of tension. Left alone all day, I felt bored and starved for conversation, a need the General wasn't quite as ready to meet as my physical ones. Four days I settled for short bits of small talk because getting Hux to converse could be like pulling teeth. Which was why, when he told me to get him a glass of Tevraki whiskey instead of his usual, bitter tea one night, I did so gladly, hoping the alcohol would loosen his tongue. I waited till his glass was half empty before I tried my luck at some idle chitchat, but with little success. Backing off, I decided to give it a bit of time and let him read. After about an hour, he sent me to get him a refill and after sitting down his glass, I tried my luck again. All that got me was an exasperated remark at my lack of conversational skills.

"Perhaps I'm expecting too much from someone grown in a tank," he said acidly, and stung, I answered without thinking.

"I have a birth mother, you know." Talking about this wasn't something I enjoyed, but now it was too late because Hux gave me an inquisitive look. "Implanting a slave with a designed embryo was cheaper for Taka than to procure an incubator tank." I couldn't quite meet Hux's eyes as I explained this. I had never fully learned to keep my emotions in check when it came to my past, to the painful memory of the woman I had thought to be my mother—until I had learned enough of biology to know better. Uncomfortable, I tried to redirect the conversation. "Guess your deal with him will remedy that."

Hux scoffed. "Catering to scum like Gorat," he said and I felt a strange pang at his condescending tone, "making _deals_. All, so Ren can question my methods, humiliate me in front of his council and show everyone how far I've fallen."

I was glad I had succeeded in distracting him away from the painful topic of my birth mother. Except that now his tone had become cold and his frustration so palpable, I suddenly wasn't sure if that had gone about it the right way. I cleared my throat.

"So…" I started tentatively, trying to steer the conversation back into safer waters without being sure where that might be. "If you hate Taka so much—what he does, I mean—why did you demand he give up…what he considered his favorite masterpiece?"

It felt weird to put it that way; we both knew I was talking about myself. But I was curious and, at the same time, hoped to remind Hux that he had gotten his way in the end, would lighten his mood. In a certain way, I was right: The memory did fill him with triumph. But there was something else, too, something akin to derision.

"It was you," he said. His eyes remained cold and his face impassive, but I could feel the irony of it amusing him. "You were so inappropriately sure of your position. And yet, when I mentioned to Gorat that you had been caught snooping and told him that I saved you from being shot—" I snorted at that, but Hux paid me no mind, "—I could see you had a point. You weren't some run of the mill slave to him. So, I gave him a choice: Give you up or lose the deal. It didn't take him very long to decide."

I couldn't hold the General's eyes any longer, and my gaze dropped to the floor. All my adult life, I had tried to ignore the fact that I wasn't free in the conventual sense. And compared to the lot of some of the other slaves I had seen, I even counted myself lucky. I knew Taka had treated me kinder than most owners did their sentient property, had truly convinced myself that he cared about me. But now Hux made it sound as if it had not been a hard decision for Taka to trade me off to make his deal with the First Order. Perhaps, I hadn't been that special to him, after all.

"Just don't flatter yourself," he continued, and that was so far off the mark of what I had been thinking, I almost laughed. "The plan was to keep you locked up and out of sight until the rendezvous, then sell you off to the highest bidder. Maybe hand you over to Ren, with a condescending remark about his preference for genetically manipulated…creatures."

"That still the plan, then?" I asked. "To sell me? Or give me away?" For some reason, his words had hurt. And I knew the maintenance work on his ship was two-thirds complete, so the question of what was to become of me had been on my mind.

"If I give you to Ren, you'll be dead within a day," he said casually, and I went cold at his words. "You share a certain lack of impulse control."

_Impuls control?!_

"You're fucking kidding me, right?" Hux's words had struck me as so unfair I had completely forgotten to watch my language. _Oh, shit!_ I thought and flinched, convinced he would zap me at any moment. The remote to my collar might not be openly attached to his shirt any longer, but I strongly suspected he carried it in easy reach for just such a slip-up.

Yet no shock came, and when I finally dared to look up, I saw he'd been watching me, enjoying to see me squirm without having to lift a finger to cause it.

"Tell me about your mother," he said, showing that he had chosen a different form of torture to punish me. So much for hoping my pain had gone unnoticed.

"Her name was Rylani Dellos," I said softly. I had learned early on that lying under such circumstances was not a risk worth taking. "She was from Gatalenta, originally. She was kind and patient. Never talked much about being a slave—none of us do—and I didn't really understand what it meant, anyway. She used to tell me stories about knights who could do magic. And she called me Lala."

I sat there waiting for Hux to say something condescending, maybe even cruel. But he didn't.

"She was human?" he asked instead, not unkindly, but clearly surprised. I nodded.

"How old were you when Gorat took you away from her?"

"Ten." I didn't even ask how Hux had figured that Taka had decided to remove me from her influence at some point.

"Ten?" he repeated, so dumbfounded it made me smile.

"Yeah," I said. "Someone once told me that's the age at which students are admitted to the Royal Academy on Naboo."

"Do you know what that is?"

I shrugged. "No, but it sounds nice." There was still a lot of surprise on Hux's face, and I knew what he was curious about, so I answered his question before he could ask.

"He didn't—er—have sex with me that early." I had only just in time remembered not to say 'fuck'. "He waited until I was almost fifteen."

"How generous of him." His sarcasm annoyed me a little. There certainly were slave girls who had been less lucky in that regard. But I didn't say anything.

Then, all he did for a moment was to take a sip from his drink. In the end, I was the one who spoke again next. Not that sitting in silence wasn't now strangely comfortable between us, but Hux had already let me refill his glass once. And now that it was almost empty again, I smelled an opportunity for more information.

"So, going to him for genetic designs, that wasn't the idea of that other General? Engell?" I asked.

I was a little disappointed to find out it might not have been the female who came up with the plan to use manipulated clones after all. Also, Hux had mentioned this Ren before and, then, as now, his emotions were stormy where that guy was concerned. So, I avoided asking about him openly…even though I was dying to know more about someone whose mere mention could rouse such emotion in the usually reserved General.

"Ren was the one unsatisfied with my methods of finding recruits. Engell found your master for him," he admitted.

"It's obvious you hate her," I said and then, "is it because she's a female?"

"No," he answered, sounding cold. "The claim that women are weaker than men was one of the first lies my father ever told me. And one of the easiest to figure out."

Now, that was intriguing. I wanted to hear more, of course, but I wasn't sure it be safe for me to press my luck. So I waited and hoped.

"He married a meek woman because it was all he was fit to manage. And then resented her for her inability to stand up for herself," he continued. I suddenly realized I had been staring at him and quickly lowered my eyes. His expression had remained even, and his voice was almost bored as he spoke, but I could sense a…tightness underneath.

"So, your mother—" I had planned to carefully feel my way toward more of this tantalizing information, but Hux interrupted me at once.

"She wasn't my mother."

_Oh. Oooh._

I was still processing that information when he put down his drink and rose. His eyes and his mood had both turned equally dark, and I could feel my mouth go dry and my heart speed up in the few seconds it took him to round the table and lean over me.

"My mother caught my father's eye working in one of the kitchens of the Officers Academy on Arkanis," he said. He bent down and his gaze focused on my lips. His hand moved to my neck and into my hair, making me shiver. "And when she refused his advances, he took her by force."

Hux sat down on the low table, moving a few inches away, his hand gently tugging me along to follow. Shifting, I could feel his other hand gliding up my leg, taking the fabric of my dress with it. But only as high as my knee, where he stilled, his thumb stroking my thigh. It didn't feel sexual. More like he was grounding himself by touching my skin.

"She survived what he did to her," he continued. "Survived giving birth to me. Even had the strength to love me, I suppose. Because when it became clear my father's wife was barren and he decided to take me from her, she fought for me. Fought him so hard, he had her executed."

I shuddered, both at the coldness in his voice and at the coldness in his heart.

"But, bastard that I was, I was never truly good enough for my father. And he let me feel it, violently, for years. It was a woman who put a stop to that. And, just a few years ago, it was a woman who helped me finally get rid of him."

I was momentarily struck dumb by the gravity of his words. And also by the intimacy of him sharing such details about his life with me. But when words fail me, I have other ways of expressing myself, so I leaned forward, took his face into my hands, and kissed him. I went slow, testing the waters, but his mouth opened for me easily, and soon what had started as a gesture of comfort and appreciation, of closeness, turned into something more passionate.

I could feel his unease at having revealed so much to me so suddenly; could sense in Hux the fear of having relinquished too much control too quickly. He started to rise, and I knew what he had in mind to shift the balance of power back in his favor…but I had a slightly different idea.

"Wait," I said, softly, as he took my hand and tried to pull me with him. I knew what I was planing would do a better job at both, allowing him to feel comfortable in his dominance again while also further strengthening the intimacy which had started to bud between us. But I needed him to submit just a tiny bit more before I could put that plan into action. "Will you sit?"

He stared down at me for a moment and I did my best to meet his gaze openly, trying to make him understand that I was asking, not telling. And then he sat back down on the couch, and an almost girly happiness swept through me. Moving swiftly to reward him for his compliance, I scooted over and placed a sweet peck on his cheek. It caused his tension to mix with a trace of amusement, and I could feel a smile tug on my lips as I slid down and settled between his legs. But as my hands stroked firmly up his thighs, ready to go for the waistband of his slacks, he suddenly took hold of my wrists.

"What are you doing?" he asked in that way he sometimes did when I thought it was perfectly obvious what I was doing. Instead of an answer, I gave him a raised eyebrow and a hint of a smile. Yet, since his grip on my wrists was strong and since I didn't want to struggle, I decided he needed a bit more persuasion—for whatever reason—and moved back up for a kiss.

He hesitated a little there, too, and I actually found it sweet. Since I knew now that it wasn't inexperience, I wasn't quite sure what was holding him back. But it was a nice change from men who usually couldn't wait to get their pants off and their dick into my mouth. I kissed him slowly, teasingly, and finally, his grip loosened, allowing my fingers to hook into his pants and pull. He even lifted his hips, so I could pull the slacks further down, which I took as a sign that he'd now made up his mind to let me continue.

I fought to keep my amusement from showing on my face: he was already half hard…and hadn't we just been talking about his mother?

I took hold of him with practiced hands, stroking, while settling back between his feet. Between the couch, Hux's legs and the table in my back, there wasn't a whole lot of room, but I managed.

When I looked up, I found Hux staring down at me intently. I could feel myself blush, but did not break eye contact as I slowly licked along the bottom of his shaft, before tenderly suckling the tip. Hux took a deep breath.

Since he wasn't fully hard, yet, I could take him in completely without straining. And, while losing sight of his face, I could feel his reactions shoot through him: pleasure and need and a strange pang of guilt. His cock was quickly swelling in my mouth, and I sucked him in deep, pressing my tongue against his length and being mindful of my teeth.

Hands found their way into my hair, and I half expected him to take over the pace now—it was what most men did. But Hux didn't press or pull, nor did he shove his hips up. Instead, he allowed me to set my own rhythm, which I greatly appreciated.

Once he was fully hard, I pulled back a little, taking hold of his cock by the root and suckled its tip. His fingers curled and precum coated my tongue, salty, and not at all unpleasant. My thumb pressed into the underside of his shaft, and my tongue danced across the slit on its top, lapping up more liquid. That earned me the first jerk of Hux's hips and a hiss of breath, pressed through tight lips.

I had to fight a little smile. It would have ruined the vacuum my mouth was building around him, as I took him in deeper again, my hand stroking up as my lips moved down and then in reverse in sure, steady strokes. Without him pushing, it was easy for me to manage my breathing, and despite a slight soreness in my jaw, I was genuinely enjoying myself. The strained, soft noises I was able to get out of him over the next few minutes were just too delicious.

Just as I could feel him nearing his climax, he surprised me again: instead of fisting in my hair, his hands moved to my shoulders, gently pressing as if he was trying to push me away.

"Wait," he said hoarsely. And while I couldn't exactly read his mind, I realized he was warning me that he was about to come, giving me a chance to pull back if I wished to. My free hand found his and gave it a reassuring squeeze before I did the exact opposite, taking him in as deeply as I comfortably could. Then I hummed.

The effect was instantaneous and exactly as I had expected. Hot, salty liquid filled my throat, and I took my time swallowing each spurt, not caring about the slight excess that found it's way out of my mouth and dripped down my chin.

Hux's hips jerked, and I held him in my mouth while he rode out his orgasm. And longer, allowing him to slowly soften surrounded by my warmth. My jaw began to twinge in protest, but I knew it would be worth holding out just a little bit longer. Eventually, I felt Hux's breath even out but didn't quite give him enough time to regain his full composure before I gave another, firm suck.

"Stars, woman," he groaned, clearly caught off guard. Finally allowing myself a smile, I slowly let him slip from my mouth and let go of his hand. His hands, in turn, let go off my shoulders, as he straightened up, and I pulled back further, discreetly wiping my chin and mouth.

Moving out of the way to give Hux a chance to righten his cloths in dignity, I twisted, reached over the table to pick up his abandoned glass and drained it. It had been almost empty, with just enough of the whiskey left to cause that sweet, fiery sensation Tevraki was known for to spread through my body. Hux made a scoffing noise behind me, and as I turned back to him, he leaned forward with a glint in his eyes, his hands gliding into my hair.

"What did I tell you about alcohol?" he scolded, but before I could respond, he pulled me up and kissed me. A pleasant surprise, given where my mouth had just been, and I sighed against his lips, then moaned as his tongue pressed against mine. I keenly felt the burn the whiskey had left and wondered if Hux could tase it, too.

As he settled back on the couch, he pulled me with him until I was straddling his lap, his hands holding my face a few inches away, so he could study me. I knew he was neither angry nor annoyed, but there was something…a kind of mischievousness, perhaps? Not a word I'd thought Hux would ever bring to mind, and I bit my lip to keep from smiling.

"What am I going to do with you, if you don't listen?" His voice was stern, but a tiny quirk of his eyebrows gave away his amusement. Which didn't mean I wasn't wary of that glint still lingering in his eyes.

"Uhm, sorry?" I offered and Hux let out a deep breath, then pulled me in for another, short kiss.

"Off to bed," he ordered then, but something made me pause.

"You're not coming?" I gave him my best pleading look.

"Now, Lamees." The warning was back in his tone, so I disentangled myself from him and slunk off, figuring he probably had a report to finish reading. I was already drifting off to sleep when I felt Hux join me under the covers and then pull me to him, my back against his chest, so he could nuzzle his face into my hair.

"Go to sleep," he whispered, so softly I could barely hear him. It made me feel strangely warm inside. There was something in Hux's torrent of emotions that made my throat tighten up. I could tell that he was starting to get somewhat attached to me. And that he felt…well, maybe not _afraid_ of that, but definitely a little worried. And guilty, perhaps?

Given my situation, I should have been relieved: Pride of ownership in a master could keep a slave safe from all number of things, an emotional connection even more so. So why, instead of feeling an ease of the uncertainty of my situation, did I have this tightness settling in my chest?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The name Rylani Dellos is a Farscape reference (full name 'Rylani Jeema Dellos') and her homeworld, Gatalenta, is also the home of Resistance Admiral Amilyn Holdo. The planet is known for its tranquility, its tea, and a strong Jedi tradition.
> 
> The woman who intervened when she found out about Brendol abusing his son was Grand Admiral Rae Sloane, and the woman who helped Hux rid himself of his father (by poison) was Phasma. (But most of you know that.)
> 
> Aaand, last but not least, here is a fun fact: The dialog in this chapter was the very first non-sexual interaction between Hux and Lala I ever wrote xD (Must have been November 2019 or even earlier o_O)


	20. Contiguity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things between Hux and Lamees grow more comfortable, and she finally finds the courage to ask an important question.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> An even bigger thank you than usual goes to Cari. Since I was clumsy enough to douse my right hand in near-boiling fat last Saturday morning, and voice-to-text was being horribly uncooperative—probably due to my accent—she came over, helped me with my laundry and then typed and edited this chapter together from the few incoherent pieces I had managed to write.

I woke with a start, feeling cold and tense. I wasn't sure which of the two sensations had pulled me from sleep, but as my body became more aware, my heart began to race. I sat up, trying to fight the rising panic in my chest, and only once my mind was fully awake did I realized the anxiety causing all this wasn't my own.

The room was dark, but thanks to the consul light on the other side of the bed, not pitch black. Through the dim, I could just make out that I had moved away from Hux in my sleep, while the General had held on to the covers. Hence my being cold. The anxiety, though, came from Hux himself, and even though he lay perfectly still and his breath was steady and deep, I knew he was having a nightmare.

Planing to turn on the lights and pull him back into reality, I leaned over to reach for the console controls of his bystand. But Hux was not a heavy sleeper, and before I could reach the switch, he woke with a hiss and grabbed me. I froze as his fingers dug into my arms tightly enough to hurt. Any more pressure and I'd definitely end up with bruises.

Luckily, after only a second or two, Hux took a deep breath, and while his emotions remained fearfully dire, his hands relaxed enough for me to carefully pull out of his grip. Stretching, I pressed the length of my body against his, not knowing exactly how awake he was and hoping he'd just go back to sleep. It was one of those moments which reminded me that I didn't actually know Hux enough to judge how best to handle a situation like this…would he accept comfort in the form of closeness? I wasn't sure, because I knew Hux didn't tolerate weakness well, not in others nor in himself.

I could try and distract him with sex, of course, since I knew that he enjoyed fucking when waking up during the night. But I didn't know what he'd been dreaming about, so there was a risk of pissing him off by trying. And perhaps an even greater one of inviting him to let out his frustration on my body. I could still feel a twinge where his hands had held me in place, and while I thought I'd be able to take a bit of pain while he fucked me, there was always the danger of him getting carried away. Taka had done that sometimes, making me ache for days.

Experimentally, I let my hand glide over his chest, paying close attention to his emotions. His skin was cool and a bit clammy, and underneath, he was tense, his heart beating rapidly under my fingertips. I nuzzled into his neck as my hand wandered further south…but as soon as it passed his belly button, Hux put his hand on mine to hold its progress. His grip wasn't hard like before, but I still got the message. Not sex then.

After a moment, I turned on my side, sort of tugging Hux along by his hand, and just as I had hoped, he allowed me to settle with my back against this chest, then pulled me against him. I felt his breath in my hair, and for once, my pheromones did precisely what they were supposed to: soon, he went back to sleep.

I stayed awake a while longer, ideally playing with his fingers entwined with mine.

———

Two nights later, I was curled up in my usual spot on one couch, while Hux was sitting in his usual place on the other. He seemed completely absorbed in his reading, with his legs crossed and one arm thrown over the back of the sofa. I was musing about how much I wanted to snuggle against his chest, just to feel his warmth, when his voice pulled me out of my thoughts.

"Is there something you want, Lamees?"

Startled, I shook my head. Hux released a breath, and although his eyes never left the screen, I could tell something had annoyed him. I just wasn't sure what.

"Remember how I told you to speak in full sentences?"

_Oh._

"There is nothing I want, General," I said, feeling stupid.

He blinked, and for a second, I wondered if I had somehow used the term incorrectly. I knew it was a military rank, and I knew it was a high one, but that was it.

"You may call my Hux when we're alone." His voice was even, and I wasn't sure if he expected an answer. But I thought I detected a hint of softness on his face, so, after a moment's hesitation, I spoke.

"If you want, you can call me Lala. 'Lamees' always makes me feel like I'm in trouble," I explained sheepishly and then blushed as Hux lowered his datapad to look at me. I quickly dropped my gaze, wondering if I had gone too far…after all, the General could call me whatever the fuck he wanted, and suggesting a familiarity that wasn't there might piss him off. Just because I had, a moment ago, been musing about how I'd like to be close to him for something other than sex, did not mean Hux felt the same way. But when he spoke, his voice was calm, and I couldn't detect any anger in him.

"Is there something you want then, Lala?"

"I, uhm…" Feeling my blush deepen, I cleared my throat to steady my voice. "Would you mind if I join you?" A few seconds ticked by and, carefully, I looked up to better judge his reaction.

"And does this unusual display of bashfulness mean it's not sexual gratification you're after?" he asked, one eyebrow slightly raised. "Because we did establish what happens when you approach me unbid, did we not?"

I huffed out a snort, unconsciously tugging on the metal ring around my neck and nodded. Hux's eyebrow quirked even higher as he watched me, waiting, and I realized my mistake.

"Yes, we did," I conceded. I could tell he enjoyed watching me squirm, so part of me wanted to clam up and stop giving Hux the satisfaction. But in the end, my longing for closeness won over my pride. "I'll behave, I promise?"

He let me wonder a moment longer before, with a slight nod and a tiny gesture of his hand, he permitted me to move closer.

From that night on, we would always end up on the same couch after dinner, with Hux catching up on reports and me lazing about with my head on his shoulder. Then on his chest. Until he gave in to my perseverance and allowed me to rest my head in his lap. I had no idea how he could stand sitting in basically the same, stiff position all night, every night. But, no matter how often I hinted that we might be more comfortable elsewhere, I was always rebuffed.

As time passed, conversations between us became more comfortable, and I discovered that Hux was not as impatient in explaining the workings of his Order or the rest of the galaxy as I had expected. Yet, one question remained unaddressed, until one evening, I couldn't stand the uncertainty any longer. Hux had been in an amicable mood all night, so the opportunity was there, I just needed to find a way to bring it up.

"A kiss for your thoughts?" I tried, but all I got was a snort.

"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard." Clearly, Hux didn't consider my affections worthy compensation for sharing the workings of his mind. I gave it a few moments before I tried again, more direct this time.

"Can I ask you something?"

"I'm trying to read, Lamees." There was a hint of a warning in his voice, and normally, I would have backed off, but…

"I know, and I'm sorry." I sat up to look at him, hoping it would appease his mounting annoyance. "It's just that I know maintenance work on this ship is almost done, and, well, you never actually said what will happen with me after."

Our eyes met, and I could feel his emotions shift from irritation into something gentler before they became guarded.

"There have been reports of the Resistance recruiting new members along the rim. Once our mechanics have finished, that's most likely where we'll head," he said thoughtfully.

That didn't really answer my question, but I knew by now pushing him would get me nowhere. So I waited.

"A few generous offers were made for you," he admitted after a moment. My heart sped up, yet before I could ask for details, he continued, "but I went through too much trouble to save you from our foolish antics. So, as long as you behave yourself, you'll stay here with me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this will potentially incite a shit storm, but: why do people (including Wookieepedia, apparently) think Hux has green eyes? Is that ever mentioned anywhere? Cause I know there's this thing where filters and lighting make blue eyes appear darker, even green on film (just look at footage of Tom Hiddleston) but if you look at his eyes during the Starkiller speech, (where the lighting is by far the best in the series for judging this) they're clearly blue. Now, I have never actually seen Domhnall Gleeson's eyes, but I've seen Lauren German's and they're blue, maybe blue-grey, too. And now that the new season of _Lucifer_ is out, it strikes me how often they look darker, even green on screen. Is that it?


	21. Interlude 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a disastrous defeat at Batuu, Ren threatens Hux with consequences. Matters only get worse when Lamees draws the Supreme Leader's attention.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do I need to give a spoiler warning for a theme park ride? Because—while I'm aware that Disney is still working on plots taking place in Black Spire, Batuu, and that there's a chance the fate of the Finalizer will be explained in there—I can't see into the future. So, I'll use the Rise of The Resistance ride plot as an explanation as to how the Finalizer got damaged…
> 
> [And in case you don't remember Captain Opan click here to find his Wookieepedia Page. ](https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Tritt_Opan) ^_^
> 
> Unfortunately, since I wanted to get this out as soon as possible, Cari did not (yet) have the chance to edit this chapter, so for once, all mistakes are my own (and in case you ever wondered what my writing looks like before it goes through her filter, here's your chance.)   
> _Edit: Cari was incredibly fast, once again, so if you didn't see the first version posted, you've now missed your chance. Hehe._

**The _Finalizer_ , in orbit over Batuu**

Stone-faced, General Hux surveyed the early damage reports coming in. What had started as a routine mission to intercept a few measly transports had quickly turned into a disaster, when Resistance ships dropped out of hyperspace in what must have been a planned ambush. Three Resurgent Class destroyers had been present, but the _Finalizer_ had taken the most damage. Probably because here was where the intercepted transports—and therefore the prisoners the Resistance had come to liberate—had been kept. Or maybe it was that Kylo Ren had been on board. That man attracted bad fortune like bantha dropping did flies.

Hull breaches were reported from several decks, and rumors claimed one of those had been what had kept Ren from recapturing the fleeing Resistance recruits, nearly sucking him out into space. _If only,_ Hux thought grimly.

"Sir?" Captain Opan approached looking dour, which was not unusual but seemed particularly fitting today. "Engineering reports several issues with life support on the officers' deck. Until systems can be checked, they recommend that all quarters there be evacuated." There was a second's hesitation before the man added, "Including yours, sir."

"Yes, I know what 'all' means, Captain," Hux snapped irritably. This was just what he didn't need: his ship in disarray, Supreme Leader Ren on board, and now he would have to figure out where to store Lamees, so she wouldn't get herself in trouble. And preferably not run into Ren either, if the fates could be so kind. "Have the girl picked up and brought to my ready-room," Hux ordered, then changed his mind. "In fact, do it personally, Captain. And make sure she's decently dressed…"

There was no surprise visible on Opan's face as he nodded and went on his way, and Hux was duly grateful. Appropriate clothes had been delivered to his chambers weeks ago, but Lamees still tended to while away the days in the loose shifts she preferred. This was not something he objected to as such, just not something he had the patience to explain to anyone right now. Thankfully, Captain Opan excelled at following orders discreetly and without question.

Deciding that there was not much left for him to do on the bridge, Hux threw one last, dark look at the dusty planet Batuu before retreating to the ready-room for some quiet. But, to his annoyance, Supreme Leader Ren was already there, waiting for him.

"Impressive mess this, Hux," the Knight mocked, causing Hux to bristle in indignity. Just like Ren to lay the blame on someone else, when it had been _his_ faulty intelligence that had let to this disaster.

"'Just a few green Resistance recruits. Easy for the picking'—Those were your words, Ren!" Hux countered.

"Careful, _General_ " Ren warned, and Hux could feel a wave of dread sweep through him, undoubtedly caused by the Knights sinister powers of warping perception. Clenching his teeth to fight the forced emotion, Hux gathered himself. He was not going to allow himself to be cowed this easily.

"If you had been diligent in gathering reconnaissance before sending us here, this wouldn't have happened!"

"And if you had raised shields when I gave the order, a lot of damage could have been avoided," was the younger man's calm reply. "Damage which to repair will now be a costly endeavor." The pronounced indifference in Ren's voice didn't bode well, Hux knew. The two men stared at each other in open hatred for a moment, light eyes meeting dark, unwavering.

Until the door hissed open and Captain Opan entered, accompanied by Lamees. The girl seemed subdued by the Captain's presence, which might be owed to his grim disposition—or simply the fact that, no matter how crafty her powers of seduction might be, Opan was unlikely to be swayed by womanly charms. Ever. The man's preferences weren't something Hux usually paid any mind to, but they could be advantageous in certain situations.

To his relief, Hux saw that Lamees was for once adequately attired. _Small mercies_ , he thought darkly, as the dark grey wool of the dress made him notice how pale her skin had become. On Iridan, a dark-pink complexion had plainly shown her Zeltron heritage. But now, after weeks without exposure to UV rays, her skin had lightened so much that her blue hair was the only thing left to identify her as non-human. Unfortunately, the girl's face remained as open as ever, and despite the dark look Hux gave her, a relieved smile spread over her face as she caught sight of him. Not something Ren would miss, he knew, and sure enough, the other man's attention was immediately drawn to the slave.

"The girl, as requested, General," Captain Opan proclaimed unnecessarily.

"Yes, Captain, thank you." What was it with that man stating the obvious today? "Dismissed," _or even better,_ "Perhaps, since the Supreme Leader was just leaving, you should escort him to his shuttle. To make sure he gets off this ship safely." The Captain managed to keep his face neutral, looking back and forth between his superiors, but Hux knew pitching Opan against someone like Ren was far from fair.

"If you would, sir," Opan tried in his usual impassive tone but was ignored. Instead, Ren took a step toward Lamees, and Hux—against this better judgment—felt himself tense.

The girl had started to approach him, but then stopped as she noticed the unfamiliar man studying her, and her expression had turned guarded—the way it did when Hux returned to his chambers in a particularly foul mood. On those nights, she wisely kept her distance for a while, until he had collected himself enough to allow her close again. But Ren was a different animal entirely, much more volatile, and for a second, Hux wished there was a way from him to intercede before this could turn ugly. Unfortunately, his instincts told him that drawing attention now would severely lessen his chances of surviving until Ren got off his ship. And as convenient as the girl had proven these last few weeks, that was not a risk worth taking. For her, or anybody.

So he said nothing as the two studied each other.

"Perhaps selling your little plaything would cover the costs…" Ren mused, but this time Hux was ready.

"It would not." It was no lie: since it was always best to know one's options, Hux had already rechecked the offers which had been made for Lamees. Some had increased, and all were substantial, but not one near big enough to cover the repairs needed to make the _Finalizer_ operational again.

"She might not be worth enough to others, but I wonder…" Ren said, turning his gaze from the girl to the general, to give him one of those calculating looks Hux so hated but had learned to stoically suffer.

"Why is this even a debate?" Hux exclaimed when his endurance reached its limit, immediately berating himself for the outburst. "The First Order is well on its way of becoming the strongest power in this galaxy. Dozens of wealthy planets have joined our cause. Repairing one ship should not cause such a hue and cry!"

"It wouldn't…if this ship's commander were reliable and I'd deem it a worthwhile expense," Ren said dryly. "But you seem to have a talent for accumulating losses, Hux. Perhaps it would be wiser to deny you command of a ship and have you stationed elsewhere. Somewhere, where a wiser officer might temper your inadequacies and prevent further casualties."

"You're insane if you think I'll submit to someone else's command," Hux replied, again not quite managing to keep his voice as even as he would have liked. "I _build_ this army. There is not a single foot soldier here who has not been conditioned by programs I designed. Supreme Leader Snoke—"

"Snoke is dead," Ren interrupted with dangerous calm, "and you would do well to remember that. Unless you want to join him."

Hux held his tongue, reduced to staring daggers at the younger man, as Ren turned back to Lamees. She stared at him wide-eyed before Ren reached out his hand, and Hux saw the girl stiffen, her face taking on a familiar, blank expression. Several seconds ticked by before Hux's resolve to remain silent finally cracked.

"If you break her, you pay for her," he pressed out, and immediate regret followed. What a stupid thing to say to someone who could claim ownership of every ship in the First Order fleet and, by extension, everything and everyone on them. But Ren only huffed in amusement.

"Hardly worth the trouble," he said dismissively, and Hux saw Lamees shudder and sway as she was released from Ren's power before the Knight casually strode out of the room. With a last nod to his general, Opan followed him out, obviously remembering the earlier order to escort Ren off the ship and leaving Hux alone with a visibly trembling Lamees.

He took a step toward the girl. But she flinched away from him violently, almost as if a shock from his collard had struck her. Then she shook her head and tearfully whispered, "I'm sorry." Hux wasn't exactly sure what she meant, but he had seen grown men crack under Ren's interrogations. And while this certainly hadn't been that, he didn't expect the girl to have much of a fighting chance against whatever mind-tricks Ren hid up his sleeve. So, part of Hux whispered that he should focus on keeping his emotions in check, give her a chance to calm down.

Unfortunately, after the failure of containing the Resistance recruits, the humiliation of being surprised by an ambush, and Ren now openly threatening to take the _Finalizer_ —Hux's last bastion of power—way from him, malice won over compassion. He closed the distance between him and the girl with three quick steps, grabbing her roughly by the shoulders. She gave an annoying whimper, and Hux could see tears spilling down her cheeks. So he shook her, none too gently, to make her regain her focus. When all that got him was another pathetic whine, Hux let her go, disgusted, and turned away. He would have loved nothing more than to tell her to get out of his sight…but where would she be able to go?

"For Edge's sake, get a hold of yourself," he hissed, refusing to look at her, turning to a status console instead, to try and find something to distract himself. After a moment, the aggravating sniveling stopped, and out of the corner of his eye, Hux saw how Lamees gingerly moved to one of the rigid chairs situated in a corner, where she sat, pulled up her legs, and curled into a tight ball of misery. Out of all the things that had gone wrong for him today, none had been the girl's fault, Hux knew. Yet part of him still felt the urge to let her suffer for it, and it took several calming breaths before he trusted himself to speak in an even voice. Then, just when he thought himself ready, she beat him to it.

"I'm sorry," she whispered—again in that broken tone—and somehow that made his anger flare up once more.

"Oh, shut up!" he barked. Hux didn't even need to look…he could practically _feel_ her wince. The fact that she seemed to think any of this had anything to do with her struck him as impossibly arrogant. "Just stay there and be quiet. For once." And she did, perhaps weeping, perhaps not—Hux never knew, because he refused to pay her any more attention.

About an hour later, the engineers declared the environmental issues on the officers' deck fixed, and he summoned Opan to escort Lamees back to his chambers. Twenty minutes after that, orders from Supreme Leader Ren came in: The _Finalizer_ was to be decommissioned "due to irreparable damage"…to which Hux added his part as he slammed his fist into the holo projector so hard, the screen flickered and died.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm _terribly_ late, I know, not just with posting, but with answering comments and emails as well. And I'm so sorry. I went in for a routine brain MRI last week, and some irregularities were noticed, so I was admitted to hospital for an angiography. **Which I fucking hate!** (They stick a tube into your femoral artery and shove it all the way up to your brain. It doesn't hurt one bit, and I'm being a baby, but I cannot stress enough how much I **hate** the thought of almost two feet of tube traveling through my blood vessels. >_< Oh, and 24 hours of _absolute_ bedrest to prevent bleeding is a pain in the arse, too.) But the good news is that they were able to take care of what needed fixing, so I was released back into the wild late Friday. Then Saturday was my Mom's 75th birthday, so that took priority over fan service. ~_^ Hopefully, bar any more health issues, I should be back to posting in the usual Monday/Friday rhythm from here on out. ❤︎ And, if you like this story, you can always subscribe to make sure you won't miss any updates… *winkwink*  
> 


	22. Indenture

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux makes a decision about Lala's future and reveals what he thinks about Ren. (And somehow, there's more talk about mothers.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel bad for calling [Patrick O'Kane](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0641433/) 'ugly'. o_O Let's just agree that Lala can be a superficial bitch and move on. <_>

I was proud of myself for keeping it together until the strange officer with the ugly face had dropped me off in Hux's chambers. As soon the door had hissed shut, though, I broke down into sobs. Finally able to allow my tears to flow freely, I let then wash away some of the confusion and fear, and once I had cried myself out, I felt better. Still miserable, but more focused and able to think clearly again.

A few things I had been able to figure out while sitting in Hux's office. Like who the strange man had been: Hux had called him 'Supreme Leader'. That title, along with the name Ren or Kylo Ren, had appeared in all conduct and regulation files I had found on my datapad. So that had been the man Hux had talked about before, and whom he hated so much.

But what had Ren done to me? A small gesture from him, and suddenly, every nasty thing that had ever passed between the General and me was dragged back to the surface of my thoughts. And even worse: as these things were pulled from my memory, I felt sure they were also examined, studied, exposed, to the point it felt as if another consciousness had forced its way into mine. Feeling the emotions of others was something I was used to, something that had been part of me for as long as I could remember. But conscious thought was another matter: I couldn't read minds. Most of the time, I couldn't even tell when people were lying to me. And I hadn't believed such a thing possible, either, but—well, now I knew better.

Suppressing abuse had become a survival mechanism to me years ago, a defense to my sanity. And there were undoubtedly more sinister things lurking in my subconscious than a slap, a few shocks, or a harsh word here and there. But having these things forced to the front of my thoughts to be exposed to someone else felt like a horrible betrayal to Hux. Particularly those first two nights, which I also had not been able to conceal. So, it had been shame and guilt, which had made me try to apologize to the General. But obviously, it had not been what he had wanted to hear.

Longing for comfort, I retreated into the bedroom and slipped into bed without bothering to remove my dress. The wool was soft and warm, and without Hux around, I was grateful for the extra layer. Somehow, his rooms always seemed colder during the night cycle than they did during the day.

I must have been asleep by the time Hux joined me because I didn't feel him come in. In fact, it wasn't until his alarm buzzed the next morning that I returned to awareness at all. Hux shut off the noise, and I could feel him shift, but not leave. When I turned to look, I saw that he was sitting on the edge of the bed, as if to get up, but not quite sure it'd be worth the trouble. And, for the first morning ever, I sat up to announce my wakefulness. Hux looked lost in thought, staring ahead blankly, but his mood, while dark, didn't feel hostile. So, after a moment, I timidly reached out to place my hand on his shoulder. He stiffened, as if I had startled him, then relaxed and placed his hand over mine. Just as I felt encouraged to move closer, Hux let his hand drop and got up to disappear into the fresher.

Since there was no way I was going back to sleep, I sat up against the headboard and waited. As usual, it didn't take lone before Hux reemerged, freshly showered and dressed impeccably in his uniform, his expression stiff and his hair in that strict backcomb of his.

"I'm not angry at you," he said, and I felt grateful that he bothered to say it out loud, "but I need to figure a few things out. When I come back, we'll talk." Knowing he did not expect an answer as such, I just nodded and watched him leave.

A bit later, after I had showered and taken my usual place on the couch, I realized that my datapad had been disconnected. It wasn't broken or out of power: the screen had come to life as usual, but all it did was inform me that all access was now denied. Normally, that would have left me miffed. After yesterday, though, even I wasn't self-centered enough to let a blocked datapad distract me from the fact that something very, very big was amiss.

———

It wasn't even the fourth shift, yet, when Hux returned, looking somber and feeling worse. I had to quickly righten myself because I was hanging off the back of one couch, upside down, stretching my back—any other day, the look of surprise on Hux's face would have been comical—and then waited to see if he would head into the fresher or come talk to me. It was the latter.

"I want you to sign something," he said, so out of the blue, it took a moment to sink it.

And when it did, I looked up at him in surprise. I might not have been too versed in the ways of the universe, but even I knew that a slave's signature wasn't worth anything.

"Why? My signature has no legal meaning. I have no autocracy," I said, as he sat down. In the armchair, I noticed, effectively blocking any attempt to join him. At least not without climbing into his lap, and even on a better day, that's not something I would have simply risked again.

"I'm planning to change that," Hux said as he absentmindedly unhooked the collar of his uniform. "Only, it would be too dangerous to release you completely. Which is why, after I free you in front of a witness, you will sign an indenture contract. With me as the obligee."

I must have stared at him as I tried to keep my thoughts focused enough to make sense of what he was saying. My mind had begun to race as soon as he had mentioned freeing me, a dream which had existed—silently and buried somewhere deep within—but which I had known would never become a reality as long as Taka owned me.

"You will have better protection than you do as a slave. No one would be allowed to injure you as punishment, for example. Killing you would be murder. But most importantly, indentured servants can't be seized as collateral. Legally, at least, that will mean that no one can simply force me to give you up or send you away. The Empire used these contracts quite often, especially among non-humans with exceptional skills—" I could not suppress a grin, but Hux just looked at me sternly as he carried on without missing a beat, "—like engineering or mechanics. The indentured retains several rights not afforded to slaves. Some legal emancipation. And most importantly, once the contract runs out, is fulfilled or revoked, they are free. Our contract will automatically expire in the event of my death."

"So, if you die, I'll be free?" I thought for a moment. "What'll that be worth, though, really, if you won't be here to enforce it?"

"Not much," he allowed. "Which is why we'll find an impartial witness and file it all here, on Batuu. This way, your release from slavery, as well as our indenture contract, will make it through their system into the core—hopefully, without raising any flags in the First Order surveillance. Once that's done, it will be much harder, even for an Officer of the First Order, to ever claim ownership over you again. Should something happen to me, they might not let you go willingly, true. But, should you manage to get away, it will make it much more difficult for them to get you back. As an escaped slave, you would not find succor, anywhere. But as a free woman, you might have a chance."

"Then why not just set me free now?" I said, trying to make it sound like a joke. It wasn't to me, but I didn't want to push my luck.

"Yes?" he asked, mildly amused, just as I had hoped. "And where would you go? The galaxy is at war. Human supremacy ideas are on the rise. The First Order is joined by more and more systems every day, and those who refuse to accede willingly will soon be subdued."

"That's it, huh?" I pushed myself up and, carefully, approached. Hux leaned back in his chair and made no move to stop me, so I sat down on his lap, facing him. "No…personal reason for you to want to keep me?"

"Is that what you want to hear? That I've grown so used to having you around, I'm not willing to let you go?" He smirked up at me, but his hands took hold of my hips and pulled me a bit closer. "Don't flatter yourself."

His voice was perfectly stern, but there was that twitch around his mouth, that quirk of his brows, which betrayed his amusement. And when I took his face into my hands and bent down to kiss him, I felt his hand sneak into my hair. I hadn't expected he'd let me kiss him for long—it still felt like there was more he wanted to discuss. Or, if anything, I would have thought his mood would change entirely, and he'd tow me off to the bedroom. Instead, he just sat there, stopping me every time I tried to give him room, never allowing me to pull back completely, yet not letting our kissing progress into anything more passionate, either. It was surprising and very, very pleasant. But it couldn't last forever.

"Can I ask you something?" I eventually managed to interject in-between kisses. And despite the reluctance I felt in him, he allowed me to righten up enough to look at his face.

"You say you're doing this, so no-one can simply take me away from you…" I asked, carefully watching his reactions. "But, your leader? Ren? He could still take me if he wanted to, couldn't he?"

"Soon, the First Order will rule the galaxy. And as long as Kylo Ren rules the First Order, there won't be anything, nor anyone, he can't take, or maim, or kill, as he desires." His emotions were dark, and his eyes had grown very serious, but he wasn't angry. I nodded at what he'd said, then suddenly realized that it included Hux, too. Thinking back to their heated exchange, the open hatred between them, I had to suppress a shudder.

"What is it between the two of you?" I asked carefully. "He hates you almost as much as you hate him…" Hux looked at me pensively a moment before he answered, the way he sometimes did right before he told me something personal about himself.

"Someone like Ren doesn't suffer defeat lightly. And I was there to witness his foolishness as he allowed a single man to distract him from our goal to wipe out the Resistance." There was no gloating in his voice, only a deeply felt disdain. "We had them all cornered in an old mining base on a planet called Crait. But before we could get to them, Ren got distracted by a mirage, and we lost our chance. And who knows what his orders would have been, had he known his mother was still alive in there."

"Wait—his mother?" I blinked. Somehow it was strange to think that this angerball of a man had a mother. Hux snorted. Where I was shocked, he seemed darkly amused.

"Leia Organa Solo. Princess of Alderaan, Hero of the Galactic Civil War, General of the Resistance and de facto leader of their ragtag gang of smugglers, thieves and saboteurs. An obstacle in the path of order for over forty years." There was so much sarcasm and hate in Hux's voice when he spoke about this person, I wondered if it wouldn't be safer to change the subject. But I was so curious…the leader of the Resistance was a woman? Kylo Ren's mother was a _princess_?

"What do you mean, 'had he known his mother was alive'?" I asked.

Hux scoffed. "Before they went to ground on Crait there was an altercation between the Resistance and the First Order in space. Just a skirmish, really. The bridge of their flagship was destroyed, and our intel at the time indicated that that had been the end of their precious princess. The records now show that Ren was the one who fired on the bridge. He had already taken out their main hangar, so our officers have little reason to doubt him. But I was there, and I watched the holoscreens. He was on approach, he must have had a lock, and then? Nothing… It was his escort who landed the hit."

"So, you think he didn't fire because he knew his mother was likely to be on that bridge?"

"It's a logical conclusion. Ren has always been temperamental, and never more so than when his family is involved. He even used to wear a helmet to try and hide how much he resembles his mother. And hesitating to take his shot was the least catastrophic mistake he made that day." Hux looked lost in thought, and I guessed that he'd tell me more if I kept my mouth shut. I was right.

"We lost the most powerful weapon this galaxy had ever seen, we lost the chance to wipe out the Resistance, and we lost our true leader. All within two standard days. And it can all be traced back to Ren."

"All this because he failed to kill his mother?"

"No.," Hux allowed, "at least, not directly. Although his father did play a pivotal role in destroying Starkiller Base, the weapon we used to destroy the Hosnian System. That day was supposed to be our greatest triumph. Our emergence into the light. But thanks to Ren's failure, it became a dark day indeed."

"His dad, huh? Interesting family…" I remembered what Hux had told me about his parents and wondered if I had offended him. But Hux just snorted again. I could get used to hearing that noise more often. It was cute.

"Ren claims he killed him, shortly before the base was destroyed. And there are witnesses who corroborate his story. Plus, Solo never reappeared among the Resistance ranks, so Ren might be telling the truth, for once. But I still had to mop him up off the forest floor, unconscious and in pieces, cut down by a traitor and a girl. If only I had left him there. The losses that could have been avoided…"

"Why didn't you?"

"Snoke," he said, and I recognized the name from my reading: the man who'd led the First Order before Ren. "He had told me to bring Ren to him. Had I failed, I would have been punished. But had I defied a direct order? I would have been executed. And Snoke would have known the truth. He always knew. He was a Supreme Leader who deserved the title."

"So, what Ren…what he can do to someone's mind?" I tried not to shudder when I remembered how Ren had broken into my thoughts. "Snoke could do that, too?"

"In a way. Ren tries to aspire to Snoke's greatness, but he'll never possess the man's power, his foresight, or his control. And I'm not blaming him for his actions, so much as for the crudeness with which he carries them out. His impulsiveness and the way he lets his temper run away with him."

That had not really been an answer to my question, though, so I tried a different approach.

"My mother told me stories about people who could read thoughts, influence feelings, and make things move with their minds. I always thought those were fantasies, but after yesterday…"

"She was from Gatalenta?" Hux asked and I nodded. "That planet had strong ties to the Jedi Order, once. Perhaps that was what she spoke of."

My eyes widened in surprise. "Yes, 'Jedi' was a word she used! Are you saying you know stories about these knights, too?" The amusement on Hux's face deepened, and while I really like that look on him, causing such mirth with my ignorance also made me feel like a foolish child.

"Did I say something funny?" I said, pouting. Which _almost_ got me a smile.

"Maybe," he said, "but storytime will have to wait either way. We'll be leaving for Black Spire in less than an hour, and I still need to make a few arrangements. Be ready for Opan to pick you up."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Someone *coughlisacough* pointed out that a 'ready-room' was "sooo Star Trek". ^_^' _So what?_ I say to that. Because there are easily half a dozen references in this story, from Star Trek, Firefly, Stargate, Farscape, Dr. Who, and more… Some obvious, some not, some yet to come, but many already past. So, as long as we don't hear the tell-tale purr of Lorca's tribble, you nerds please keep your hats on. ^.^ Savvy? 
> 
> (I'm only half-serious, of course. ~_^ Please don't stop correcting any canon mistakes! I'd be more than willing to change 'ready-room' to something more Star-Wars-y if any of you can come up with something. But, truth is, I don't think the Empire—and by extension, the First Order—was that big into privacy and Star Destroyers don't actually _have_ private offices for officers.) 
> 
> Oh, wow. Ren's a crowd-pleaser, hu? I got five new subscriptions in four days. ^_^' I hadn't planned to have him in this story a lot, since he's devilishly difficult to write. (And, well, distracting. I have a similar [reaction to Adam Driver as John Oliver.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VVHD7YIAmmI)) But I guess I'll have to plan him in more.  
> Message received. ~_^


	23. Interlude 5 (E)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux and Lamees visit Black Spire to take care of legal matters. (I never thought I'd write an E rated Interlude chapter. o_O But a request is a request.)   
> This chapter also inspired another (very) dark one shot, called _Crush_ which can be found [here.](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26337760)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know anything about the _Star Wars: Galactic Starcruiser/Halcyon_ Hotel plot—other than, if I ever win the lottery, that's what I'll spend the money on—so don't worry about spoilers (and forgive any canon deviations, should you be reading this after September 2020)  
> 

**Black Spire Outpost, Batuu**

General Hux stepped out of the small clothes shop into the buzzing street-life of Black Spire and blinked in the sudden light. The female Twi'lek who ran the store had been vexingly cheery, but at least she had delivered what he'd been looking for, just as she had promised in their previous communication. And she had neither been overly inquisitive nor commented on his civilian clothes, both things that Hux appreciated.

Heading west through the outpost's meager market, he reached Docking Bay 9 just as Lamees and Opan emerged from the dark hangar. The Captain was in plain clothes as well, so the pair of them attracted little attention, especially among the armored Stormtroopers milling about. Hux watched the girl looking around as if confused before she visibly pulled herself together and her gaze cleared. Interesting.

True, she hadn't been off the Finalizer in a few weeks, and he had little idea about how many other places she had seen before he took her from Gorat. But Black Spire was a small outpost: One cantina, a few food stalls, docking bays, some shops. Not very impressive, even for someone like her, which made him suspect that it was the mass of people crowding the street, more than the unfamiliar surroundings that overwhelmed her.

Opan had spotted him already, of course. The man never missed much. And when the Captain pointed him out to Lamees, the girl came over looking relieved.

"I'm sorry," she said sheepishly. "There's so many people. Took a moment to get used to." Then she smiled at him with bright eyes, and suddenly Hux wondered if it hadn't been cruel of him to keep a creature like her so isolated. Or foolish, to bring her here and remind her that there were, in fact, other sentient people in the galaxy to interact with beside himself.

"No matter," Hux said as he looked her over. He had chosen an earth-colored tunic and a slim pair of pants for her, to match his own civilian clothes. They were made from light material to fit the warm climate, but long, also, to prevent her from catching too much sun. He rather liked how pale her skin had become.

For now, she was still wearing his collar, which made him able to locate her anywhere on this planet. Or off, if push came to shove, as long as she wasn't in hyperspace. He didn't relish the thought of giving that up, same with the convenience of being able to discipline her at the bush of a button. He would have to find another way of putting a tracker on her, he mused. A piece of jewelry, say; nothing too flashy, yet clearly marking her as his, once the slave collar was removed.

"You're not wearing your uniform," Lamees stated, pulling him out of his thoughts.

"In a place like Black Spire, it would be unwise to go out in uniform without an escort," he explained. "And an escort would attract exactly the kind of attention we don't need."

"So, I'll have you all to myself?" she replied cheekily and took a step closer. Torn between amusement and annoyance, Hux caught her hands as they began to sneak around his waist and saw her eyes take on a guarded expression.

"Later," he promised, "and there's no need to flaunt our familiarity out in the open." She nodded but looked disappointed and maybe a little hurt, which only increased his amusement. She really was a perfect child, wearing her emotions on her sleeve the way she did. To lessen the sting of his words, he brushed his thumb over her cheek, then took hold of her jaw to make her look up at him. "There is a rather important appointment we have to keep," he reminded her. "Not something you'd be willing to miss, I assume?"

At that, her eyes lightened again, and she smiled as she shook her head. Satisfied, Hux let go of her and began to steer them toward the noisy cantina. Opan trailed behind, blending in with the crowd so seamlessly, he practically disappeared.

The round building was filled with patrons having a late lunch, a snack, or an early drink, and while the smells, the noise, and the mass of people graded on his nerves, Hux knew he could not have asked for better cover. Keeping this transaction hidden from the First Order, or more specifically from Ren, for as long as possible was essential: Only if their indenture contract made it into the core without being challenged would it become legally binding—by First Order law and the law of the dying Republic, both. It was what had made this cloak and dagger nonsense a regrettable necessity.

But Hux hated being out of uniform, especially among crowds: Normally, people would scatter at his approach or be made to do so by his escort. Now he had to weasel through the press of them, just like anyone else. He had expected Lala to shrink at the masses, secretly hoping she'd be intimidated and subdued by it all. Instead, once he had pointed out the short, fat man they had come to meet where he was sitting in his booth, she had confidently started to make her way toward him. So swiftly did she move, past the bar and a DJ droid installed in a music station, that Hux took hold of her arm to prevent her from getting away from him.

He was annoyed, and his grip wasn't gentle, but Lamees just smiled back at him, barely slowing down and pulling him along in her wake instead. Grudgingly, Hux allowed her the lead for now, yet it reawakened his doubts about bringing her here. It had been his only choice, but he would definitely have to remind her of her proper place again later.

Once they reached the table, short introductions were made. Their contact, Jedd Karz, was a henchman of Oga Garra—her, in turn, being the woman in charge when it came to any local business of questionable legality—and it had taken Opan less than a standard hour to confirm Karz would handle the matter with the required discretion. Unfortunately, that did not prevent Karz from trying to rope them into meaningless small talk. And while Hux did his best to impede the man's efforts before they properly began, Lamees seemed inclined to indulge him. To be expected, Hux thought, since this was the first civilian she was allowed words with in over three weeks. But a nudge and a warning glance quickly made the girl hold her tongue.

Hux had agreed to pay extra in order to speed things up, but only as long as everything would be prepared to his satisfaction. And Karz had taken that to heart because it took less than five minutes for the first part of their transaction to be completed: Both Hux and Karz signed the order which released Lamees into freedom with a scan of their thumbprints, while a small blood sample was required from the girl to confirm her DNA. For this, Karz used a small device that pricked Lala's finger with a needle, and Hux noticed with satisfaction that, despite her sensitive skin, the girl did not flinch.

After that, the second part took even less time. No witness was required, just a print from both contractors, and the thing was done. For a moment, Hux marveled at the careless ease with which Lamees surrendered her newly found emancipation to him. As he had hoped, she had little to no comprehension of the gravity of what she had just signed, meekly accepting his explanations as to how and why he wanted it done.

"That was so simple," she said, astonished, and Karz gave her a sleazy grin.

"It is when your solicitor knows what he's doing. And don't you worry, miss, we're used to making transactions of this kind out here…"

Hux smirked. The man didn't know it yet, but if things went according to Hux's plan—and they usually did—this would be the last transaction Karz ever made; of this kind or any other.

"One more thing," Hux said and pulled a small, silver square from his pocket. It took some effort to keep his face straight when Lamees tensed in alarm: He had not electrocuted her in days, yet the way she flinched whenever she felt guilty was darkly appealing. As was the way she looked at him now, her eyes wide, openly torn between hope and apprehension.

Hux unlocked the remote with his fingerprint, then pushed the sliding switch on its side, and with a soft click, the magnetic lock of the collar disengaged. Lala sat perfectly still as he reached up and carefully removed the thin, metal ring. Then, rather suddenly, she threw her arms around his neck. Karz chuckled, and Hux threw him a dark look but suffered the girl's hug for a moment before taking hold of her shoulders. However, there was no need to push her away as she was quick in interpreting the gesture and pulled back with a shy smile and a whispered apology.

"A drink to celebrate! You!" Karz called out, loud enough for the bartender to hear. "Jet Juice for me and my two friends, eh?" And Opan, from his convenient place at the bar, heard him too. A single look from Hux and the Captain nodded in understanding.

Hux did not need to watch to know what happened next: The bartend would prepare three drinks, and somewhere between that and these drinks finding their way to their table, Opan would slip something into one of the glasses, moving it discreetly away from the others. How or when Hux could not always be sure—but in over a decade, the Captain had never disappointed him. A few hours from now, half a standout day at the most, Karz would then fall ill with symptoms mimicking a common cold. And by this time tomorrow, he would be dead.

Not always his method of choice, this. When it was personal, Hux much preferred a blaster, the freedom to take his time, and the chance to see the light fade from his opponent's eyes. But for less significant targets—or when suspicions of foul play needed to be avoided—poison did suffice.

Sure enough, as the waiter set down a tray with three small, orange-colored drinks, Hux could clearly make out the glass set apart and reached for one of the others. He'd been prepared to physically stop Lala from taking one for herself, but Gorat had trained her well, evidently, because she gave him a questioning look, and when he shook his head, she accepted his decision without complaint.

"Not for her," he said to Katz, who threw him a knowing smile.

"Of course." Katz winked before he took both leftover glasses and drained them, one after the other. The man had clumsily hinted, during their earlier communication, that he supposed Lamees to be pregnant, and Hux had not bothered to correct him. Changing a pregnant slave's status into indenture was apparently a common thing done by sentimental owners, since, while a child born to a slave was considered equally in bondage, one born to an indentured servant was free. How convenient when people came up with their own false explanations, so he didn't have to.

Knowing he had little choice, Hux forced down half of his drink—the sharp liquor was much too crude for his taste, but not drinking at all would have been suspicious—then placed both the collar and its remote in the bag already holding his purchases from earlier. After that, he saw no need to linger, so he gave Katz a last nod before taking Lala's hand and pulling her out of the booth along with him.

"May the spires keep you!" Katz called affably, and while Lamees gave him a smile, Hux ignored him, already having set his sights on something else. Guiding his charge back past the music stand, he found an unmarked door down a side corridor. It wasn't ideal, but he didn't want to wait any longer, so he pushed Lamees into the small storage room.

She made a startled noise.

"What are you do—" but that was as far as she got before he grabbed a handful of her hair and silenced her with a hungry kiss. Knowing he could rely on Opan to make sure they wouldn't be interrupted, Hux took his time to claim Lala's mouth until she let out a girlish giggle, which caused him to huff out in mock annoyance. But she had obviously guessed his intentions because she unceremoniously pushed down her pants and underclothes and kicked them off before she pulled him into another kiss. There was something to be said about her enthusiasm, he had to admit, even if it spoke of her total lack of self-control.

Despite the warm climate of Batuu and the stuffy air in the closet, Lala's skin felt hot to the touch as he took hold of her hips and lifted her up, placing her on one of the many boxes crowding the small room. Her nimble hands were already working on the fastening of his pants, and soon her talented fingers were pulling his cock free, lovingly stroking along its length before gripping the tip and giving it a sure squeeze.

Hux rewarded her by biting the soft skin where her shoulder met her neck, sucking the flesh between his teeth, just where his collar had rested less than ten minutes ago. Lamees moaned and arched into him, then the tug on his cock increased as she urgently pulled him toward her center. She guided him inside, and Hux braced himself—as he always had to—for the slick tightness of her, her _unbelievable_ warmth.

With his face still buried in Lala's neck, he drew in a deep breath. The pheromones she excreted in her aroused state were so powerful, they made him feel lightheaded. But as usual, the girl knew no restraint and urged him on, first by clenching her internal muscles and moaning, then by wrapping her legs over his hips to pull him closer, silently begging him to move. But he waited until she also added whispered words to her pleas before he finally obliged.

It would be so easy just to lose himself in her heat, in the friction of her walls gripping him, or the biochemical cocktail that threatened to pull him into mindless bliss. But Hux was nothing if not able to adapt and had relied on his iron will to survive many times. Holding back during sex was little in comparison. And it was worth it, every time, to last long enough to see Lamees unravel underneath him at least once. To see her shamelessly surrender to her pleasure, with her head thrown back, her eyes glassy, and her mouth slightly open. The way Lala always scrunched up her nose when she came was possibly the most sexually satisfying expression he had ever seen on a woman's face.

And Hux could see it now, as her head dropped back and she groaned out a curse, her muscles gripping him impossibly tight. He kept moving for as long as he felt her tense around him, then stilled to give her a moment to recover. She sighed and nuzzled his neck like an affectionate jungle cat before he buried his hand in her hair and pulled her back, so he could look at her as he began to move again. Her gaze was unfocused, and a blissful smile played along her lips, and he knew he wouldn't have to hold back now, so he thrust into her so forcefully, the box she was perched on shuddered precariously.

It was only moments before he felt his balls tighten and his cock twitch. But, impossibly, the girl was shuddering underneath him again, her fingers digging into his shoulders as if she was holding on for dear life, and the last thing he heard before rational thought washed away, was her urgently whispering 'yesyesyesyes'.

A few moments later, as he rightened his clothes with one hand, Hux leaned on the box underneath Lamees with the other, and his fingers brushed against an unseen button. A telltale noise filled the closet, and the 'box' rose about ten inches in height as its feet extended, causing Lala to yelped in surprise. Then she dissolved into childish giggles and muttered something that—an hour ago—would have earned her a zap from the collar.

Despite his annoyance, Hux had to smile.

 _Fucking gonk droids_ , indeed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case you don't know what a gonk droid is, [click here](https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/GNK_power_droid). I invented the storage space (I claim poetic license), and please don't have sex in a Disney Park! o_O From what I know about the laws in the US, I imagine you could get into terrible trouble.  
> 


	24. Teasing (E)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lamees and Hux leave Batuu to travel to Arkanis.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some of you might remember this chapter as the teaser once posted before the Prologue. I modified the beginning a bit to fit with the rest, but the smut's the same.

**Arkanis**

It was quite disappointing when Hux insisted that we leave Batuu right after our little adventure in the storage room. I would have loved to celebrate a bit and enjoy being out among people. I had missed this terribly: the background noise of sentient beings, lively and, for the most part, happy. Although I had noticed a bit of anxiety weaving through the otherwise mostly positive emotions...particularly around the dock we had landed and taken off from.

When I mentioned this to Hux during our shuttle ride, he shrugged and said that, until recently, the First Order hadn't bothered with this rock. But since intelligence had suggested that the Resistance—that small group of outlaws which he had mentioned before—had been recruiting in these parts, they had come here in the hopes of picking up members who might be persuaded to share the locations of bigger bases. Perhaps even the whereabouts of one or two of the Resistance's more prominent leaders.

My thoughts went back to Ren's mother, that princess Hux hated so much, and who I imagined to be quite a vile woman to have raised a man as filled with hate and fury as Ren was. Ren, who seemed to be at the root of everything that was bothering Hux lately, and who I had no desire to meet _ever_ again. But my musing was interrupted when our shuttle suddenly jumped into hyperspace. 

"Where are we going?" I asked Hux, who had allowed me to join him in the cockpit this time and sat opposite me in the small craft. Both he and Opan had changed back into their uniforms before we boarded, and I had just assumed we would return to the _Finalizer_ , until Hux had handed me a soft, woolen dress and told me to change, mentioning that we would be heading somewhere colder.

"Arkanis," he said, without looking up from his datapad. I stared at him for a while, hoping he'd elaborate or at least put the damn d-pad down, so I might ask a question or two of the many on my mind. He ignored me, though, as he sometimes did when he was in a mood. And eventually, I gave up, knowing it wouldn't be worth to end such an important, eventful day on a sour note for the sake of curiosity.

Since I had never traveled through hyperspace on a craft this small before, let alone with a window to look out of, I was mesmerized by the bright display of lights visible over the pilot seats. For a while, I forgot my questions and what a long day it had been, simply letting my thoughts drift among the pale, swirling clouds that streaked past. At some point, Opan left the co-pilot chair to offer nutrient packs first to Hux, who declined, then to me. I gratefully accepted as I had skipped two of my meals already, and my stomach had begun to rumble. 

When we dropped out of hyperspace a little time later, I looked out over the pilot's shoulder at the planet we were approaching. It seemed almost completely covered by clouds, and the bits of surface I could make out was all grey ocean and green forest, interspaced here and there with the twinkling lights of cities. So very different than Iridan must look like from space.

Glancing at Hux, I could see that he was staring blankly at the datapad in his hands. Then a jolt shook the shuttle as we entered the atmosphere, and my heartbeat doubled. I doubted I would ever get used to being in a steel box out in the nothingness of space, yet alone hurling toward a planet's surface in one, moving at a speed I could scarcely comprehend. And Arkanis' turbulent atmosphere didn't exactly smooth our decent.

"Entry into atmosphere successful, Sir. Should be about ten minutes to landing." One of the pilots informed Hux calmly, as I was staring out through the cockpit window, at the swirling, grey tempest through which we were descending.

The whine of the engine changed in tune, and the vibrations of the shuttle became worse as it braved the winds outside. But neither the pilots nor the General seemed worried. I, on the other hand, could feel a knot form in my stomach. When I looked back at Hux, I found him looking at me. And apparently, my growing disquiet was written all over my face. Because, after a second, he motioned for me to join him.

The breadth of the shuttle was only a few feet. But the prospect of getting up, of relinquishing the death grip I now realized I had on my seat, filled me with more unease. I almost, _almost_ shook my head at Hux… but then I felt the amusement that had replaced his brooding mood, saw the smug look on his face; and my stubborn streak won over my fear.

Taking a calming breath, I told myself not to be a baby. The few steps that took me from one side of the shuttle to the other weren't as bad as I had imagined, but I still breathed a huff of relief as I sunk down next to the General. Another jolt shuddered through the ship and gave me a convenient excuse to take hold of his arm. The wool of his greatcoat felt thick and smooth as my fingers curled into it, and since the pilots' backs were turned, I risked leaning my head against Hux's shoulder and nestled into him.

I heard him inhale and realized that my agitation was probably bad enough to send my pheromone production into overdrive—which explained why I could feel his smug amusement change into lust. I almost smiled as his hand shifted and came to rest on my thigh, a touch more intimate than anything he had ever allowed in the presence of others before. _What a lovely little moment,_ I thought as I listened to his breath deepening before he shifted and whispered, "I have never, in my life, wanted to fuck someone more than I want to fuck you, right now."

Now, that _did_ make me smile. It also did a great job of chasing away my fear of the rough descent and awakening a whole other kind of excitement. But as I lifted my head to press my lips against the skin of his neck, Hux tightened his grip on my thigh, cutting off my advances.

"Sit up," he said, not as sternly as he might have. _Huh. Moment over._ I straightened, and a few minutes later, we touched down in the safety of a hangar.

In standard time it was early evening. But here it was dark, and despite the hangar being brightly lit, I guessed from the lack of activity that it was, in fact, deep into the night in local time. Which suited me fine, because, after all the travel and the excitement, I felt exhausted.

Luckily, neither Hux nor anybody else seemed to expect me to pay attention to the short exchange between the General and the small party that had come to greet us as we stepped off the shuttle. I was so tired, I almost missed Hux dismissing the other officers and starting toward where the hangar merged into the rest of the building. Determent not be left behind in an unfamiliar place full of strange people, I hurried to catch up.

As we walked through several corridors to the apartments prepared for the General, we did not encounter anyone else, which affirmed me in my estimate of the late hour. And no way would I be able to find my way around this place easily, anytime soon. After spending my entire life in the same complex and with these corridors all looking the fucking same, it would probably take me weeks to master the layout of this place, if ever.

Then again, I mused as we reached a door which Hux used an access cylinder to unlock, I hadn't really been allowed to leave Hux's quarters on the _Finalizer_ either, so it would probably be the same here. And once I had followed him into the apartments, it occurred to me that I wouldn't mind that one bit: The sheer spaciousness of the room we had entered put any other living space I had ever been in to shame. Of course, I knew that space on a planetary base wasn't as precious as it was on a ship. But… Wow.

While Hux removed his hat and gloves, carelessly throwing them on the table of a sitting area dominating one side of the room, I tried to take it all in at once. The opposite wall seemed entirely made out of glass. Hidden lights flooded the rainforest outside in an artificial glow, pulling it from the darkness. Stepping closer, I looked out among the dripping trees. The lush, green color of their leaves was slightly muted, and deep shadows presided where the light couldn't reach.

I sensed Hux coming up behind me and leaned into him, his warmth reassuring against my back. The long shuttle ride and all the other impressions of the day had left me beat. There was no such fatigue in Hux, however: switching from ship to planet, and all the atmospheric changes that came with it, were mere routine to him. I heard the click of a button and the outside lights shut off, turning the glass in front of me into a shadowy mirror.

 _Crafty_ , I thought, as my reflection graced me with a ghostly smile. Then it struck me that this was the first time I saw us together: Hux towered over me. A few more inches and he could have comfortably rested his chin on my head. Contrasted against my blue hair and rose complexion, his skin looked almost white. His black gaberwool greatcoat framed me ominously, and his blue-grey eyes looked dark in the low lighting.

I was caught by the reflection on the mirroring glass, watching him watch me watch him. His hands were pale against my dark grey dress as one found my breast and the other my hip, pulling me flush against him.

Then his hands started to pull on the fabric.

"Raiser your arms," Hux said, softly, and I did, stretching like a loth cat. He pulled the dress off of me, and I clasped my hands behind his neck, locking them there.

Even in the darkened reflection, I could see amusement glinting in Hux's eyes. His hand was back on my breast, and I watched long fingers part and pull together, trapping my nipple. As he squeezed, I sighed contentedly, arching my back and pressing my ass against his thighs. His cock against my lower back felt hard enough to hurt, but contrary to how it had been on Batuu, Hux didn't seem in a hurry.

He bent down, inhaling my scent, his breath hot against my neck. A very pleasing noise of arousal rose from his chest, as his other hand disappeared into my panties. Short nails scratched against my mons before he pushed lower, slipping between my folds.

"Stars, you're so wet," he whispered against my neck, and I could see his eyes close as he was relishing the velvet sensation. "When did you get so wet?"

"Back on the shuttle. When you told me you wanted to fuck me," I confessed and smiled. Then two long, cool fingers slipped past my lips and inside me. As my head fell back against his shoulder, I was glad I was still holding on to his neck: between his fingers stroking inside me, the heel of his palm pressing against my clit, and my breast being squeezed, it was suddenly hard to keep standing.

"Watch yourself come," Hux growled, "then I'm going to fuck you." His lips pressed against my neck then parted, and teeth grazed against my skin. I could hardly keep my eyes open, as jolts of warm pleasure surged through my body.

"Do it," he whispered and raised his head to watch as I fucked myself on his hand.

I held onto him as my body went rigid, my fingers fisting in his coat's collar, his scissoring inside me. His palm kept moving over my clit, pressing down almost violently, drawing out my orgasm until the sensation became too much.

"Stop…please," I whimpered. "I can't take any more."

I could feel his smile against my skin, more than I could see it on his reflection. "You can take a lot more."

But, thankfully, the pressure on my clit eased and his fingers stilled, pulling out and away from me a moment later. Moaning, I finally let go of his coat and turned around in his arms. I was tired and wanted to nuzzle against the wool of his coat. But his hands took hold of my head and angled it up, so I would look at him—or so he could look down at me.

The fingers which had been inside me felt slick and warm against my face, and I could smell myself. But I didn't mind. If anything, I found the evidence of my pleasure excitingly arousing. Hux gave me a smug look before he bent down to kiss me. He was surprisingly tender, considering his erection, which I could feel straining against my stomach, mouth leisurely ghosting over mine and teeth gently nipping at my skin.

"The bedroom is to the left," he said when his mouth finally left mine. "Go. I'll join you shortly."

_Huh._

"I thought you were going to fuck me?" I whispered against his lips. His grip tightened on my head as he pulled back, and there was a dark warning in his eyes. "Oh, so you're allowed to say it, but I'm not?"

"There are a lot of things I'm allowed to do and you are not," he said, brushing his hands through my hair and I snorted.

"Fine," I conceded and turned away from him.

Now almost naked, except for my panties and boots, I slunk along, shaking out my hair and stretching as I went. A huffed out breath told me that Hux had been watching me go. Just as I had thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You got this one early, and there'll be another (very short smut) chapter over the weekend. Those of you here for the plot, hang in there. ~_^


	25. Witch (E)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux delivers on his promise from Tease. Totally plotless smut-chapter.

My thoughts were a confused torrent of darkness. I knew I was running through the streets of Black Spire, trying to get away from something I couldn't see or name, yet something I knew with a certainty only found in dreams, would be my end if it caught me. Tears were stinging my eyes, my throat felt raw, and through it all I was horribly, helplessly aroused. I had to stop and whimpered in fear—waking myself up with my own cry.

"Shhh. You're alright." Hux's voice filled me with relief. His body was pressed against my back, his hand buried in my crouch and his cool, long fingers were stroking between my lips, flooding my pussy with arousal. His cock was neatly nestled in the valley of my buttocks.

I vaguely remembered peeling off my boots and underwear before slipping underneath the covers of the huge bed. It hadn't been my intention to fall asleep, but the cool embrace of the silky sheets and the soft mattress must have pulled me under. And after such an exhausting, eventful day, who could blame me?

Gathering the slickness from between my lips, Hux's fingers moved up to cycle over my clit and I moaned, arching into him. Just as I could feel my orgasm approach, heralded by sweet jolts traveling through my thighs and up my spine, his hand pulled away to lift my leg and drape it over his. Then he guided his cock into me from behind, impaling me in one, fluid motion. His tip dragged along my front wall in such a delicious way, I moaned out a curse and pushed down around him.

He pulled back sightly and with his next thrust pushed me over onto my stomach, his hands lifting my hips so he could sink in deeper. My hands fisted into the sheets as I moved back against him, ass up and face pressed down against the mattress.

As he began to fuck me with deep, controlled strokes, I could feel Hux hold back against the urgency inside him and smiled. I knew it wasn't for my benefit he was holding back: Oh, no, he had to prove something to himself. And I wasn't going to make that easy for him.

I reached between my legs, searching, and as my hand found his balls, I gave them a soft squeeze. Groaning, Hux all but collapsed on top of me, one hand fisting into my hair and the other grabbing for my mischievous hand. Once he had it caught, he pushed his thumb into my wrist until I relented. Pulling himself up, he took my arm with him and twisted it harshly behind my back.

I gasped, then moaned, triumphant at having shattered his resolve, which he proved as he began to drive into me, finally without restraint. I gasped again as the tip of his cock kissed my cervix, causing an enticing twinge to shoot up my spine, and his balls slapped against my clit with every hard rut. 

_Now, this is more like it,_ I thought as I surrendered to each forceful thrust anew. I wasn't long before he had me hissing out curses again. And when I came, shortly after, he kept moving, pushing through the resistance of my inner spasms and gripping my wrist so tightly, it was deliciously painful. Then he groaned and I felt the warmth of his release spill inside me. 

He lowered himself on top of me again, this time with more control, and released my wrist. There was a sweet ache in my shoulder as I stretched out underneath him, humming in contentment.

"You witch," he whispered into my hair, but there was no malice in his voice. "You should be careful. Or I might really hurt you, one day."

"I won't break, you know," I huffed.

"That's what you say now…" It sounded like a dark promise and before I knew what I was doing I purred, actually _purred,_ at his words. For a moment we stayed like this, Hux's body pressing me into the mattress like a heavy blanket. But as sweat began to dry on our skin, the cold of the room began to get to me and I started to squirm.

"I thought planetside was supposed to be warmer than space," I complained weakly.

"Not this planet," Hux countered with derision. "Arkanis is about as warm and welcoming as its inhabitants. Especially in winter."

But I kept squirming and finally Hux slipped out of me with a sigh and moved to pull up the heavy covers, which our activities had pushed down to the edge of the bed. Turning, I cozied up against him and murmured my thanks against his chest.

"Go back to sleep, witch," he ordered. It didn't take me long to comply.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Notes: If you have read _You're So Cold_ and wondered what Hux is referring to when he says "Not too long ago, you told me I wouldn't be able to break you," this is it. ^_^ (Since _You're So Cold_ was never meant as more than a gift for [Molly](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Molly__Tortoiseshell__1980), and she had read this chapter already, I had no qualms about putting in a reference no one else would understand 0_0')


	26. Morning (E)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lamees, for the first time, wakes up before Hux. She knows just what to do to get the morning off to a good start. (There's plot, or at least dialog, in-between all the smut this time, I promise.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cari had an awesome idea for the next chapter, so I made some last minutes changes to this one.  
> Sorry, [Mi_ner_va](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mi_ner_va). You're going to be really mad at Hux. 0_0'

I woke up slowly to the pale light of dawn filtering into the room. The windows in here were just as spectacular as in the rest of the apartment, and watching drops form on lush leaves from the drizzle, I mused if whoever had designed this place had taken its inhabitants' privacy into consideration. The forest looked peaceful and empty, true. But it would be easy for anyone to hide among the thick foliage…

 _Oh, well_ , I thought. _If there was anyone out there last night, there sure isn't much of me they haven't seen._ I smiled at the pleasant memory, stretched, and suddenly realized that Hux was lying next to me, still asleep.

_How intriguing._

Very carefully, so as not to wake him, I turned around and raised myself on my elbow to get a better look. Hux's face was relaxed, which made him seem younger, somewhat closer to my age than I had judged him to be before. In the dull morning light, the fiery color of his hair was muted, and against the dark sheets, his skin looked almost white. I had honestly never seen anyone with skin this pale before…or a man with this little body hair. Perhaps this form of neatness was something the First Order expected from its officers, I thought, and wondered if the same methods used to rid my body permanently of unwanted hair had been used on him.

A mischievous grin spread across my face as I pulled the heavy covers back to reveal more of his chest. But the room was cold, and I didn't want that to be the sensation which woke him, so I bend over, took his nipple into my mouth, and sucked. Carefully running my nails long his thigh, I waited for him to stir, as my touch slowly pulled him out of his slumber. Then I slipped in between his legs and disappeared underneath the covers.

The air here was warm and smelled of sex. I felt right at home.

I stroked my hands up his thighs to encourage him to spread them wider, which he did with a sigh. Then I pressed my thumbs into the junctures at his hip, which earned me a little jerk and brought his cock to life. Grinning, I nuzzled into his soft hair, taking in his by now familiar scent and making sure my hot breath was ghosting over his balls.

As I took his half-hard cock into my mouth, his hands found their way into my hair. I sucked and was rewarded with a groan, or maybe a mumbled word I couldn't make out. Pressing my tongue against his shaft, I rose slightly, bracing myself against his hips, to achieve an angle at which I could keep Hux in deep, even as his cock swelled to its full size.

Then I began to move, and his grip tightened in my hair, helping me set a rhythm that was pleasing to him. Perhaps he was still too sleepy to care, but he wasn't holding back this time, and soon I could tell he was close from the urgency with which he moved my head. So, the next time he pushed me down on his cock, I moaned to open my throat and allowed the tip to sink in. Then I swallowed around him.

There was a grunt and then another, sharper jerk of his hips. I swallowed again, much to the same reaction. I couldn't breathe this way, but I trusted Hux to give me the chance to pull back, should I need to. For now, I was too delighted by his mounting urgency, and as I swallowed a third time, my throat closing around his tip, I could feel his cock twitch before a welcome warmth erupted down my throat.

Hux's hands were fisted tightly in my hair, but as I had expected, he allowed me to pull back, just enough so I could swallow his cum more easily, as a second and then a weaker third spurt filled my mouth. Some of it escaped my lips, and mixing with my saliva, ran down his shaft. But I didn't care: he'd have the sheets changed as soon as we were up, anyway.

Once I felt his grip on my scalp ease, I let him slip out of my mouth, and I started to crawl up his body, quickly wiping my wet chin on my arm. His fingers brushed through my hair and down my back. When I appeared from under the covers, I found a pair of slate grey eyes gazing at me.

"Good morning," Hux said and I grinned.

"It's been so far," I said, lazily stretching out on top of him.

Hux huffed out his amusement, and sure hands repositioned me a bit, distributing my weight to his comfort as I nestled against him. Then, for a few luxurious moments, we just lay there.

"Is there a cleaning droid waiting to come in and change the sheets, or can we stay a bit longer?" I finally asked. "The sun must be up soon." I had judged the time by the dim light falling through the windows. But Hux knew better.

"Sunrise was over an hour ago," he corrected me. "Don't be fooled: its cloudy atmosphere shields Arkanis from the sun almost always. Sunny days are few and far between. The working class tends to celebrate them like holidays."

"I have never been on a planted populated enough to have classes before," I mused. "So, how come you're still here? You're usually up so early. Not that I'm complaining…" It was rather nice, lying there, skin on skin, with Hux relaxed and in a good mood.

"No need to appear desperate," was his reply, which meant nothing to me.

"Desperate for what?"

"Support," he said, sounding lost in thought, his fingers brushing along my skin, raising goosebumps. "Surely even you have figured out by now that Supreme Leader Ren and I don't exactly see eye to eye on some matters…"

"Yes, even I have figured that out," I said, trying not to sound too amused, then turned serious. "Is that why he took the _Finalizer_ away from you. Your ship? That was him, wasn't it?"

"How do you know about that?" Hux asked, and a hand under my chin prompted me to look up at him.

"Opan." I shifted so that I could meet Hux's gaze more comfortably. "Or, well, some other officer, actually. Someone wearing a uniform, not armor? They approached us as Opan was taking me to the shuttle and asked if the Finalizer was truly deemed too heavily damaged to be repaired. Open's face didn't move a muscle. But suddenly, he was so angry, I thought he might kill the guy. He's seriously scary."

"He's the best assassin I've ever had." Hux's voice was perfectly casual, but I blinked in surprise.

"Assassin?"

"Among other things…" A smile played along his lips, and then his hands brushed up my back, short nails dragging along my spine. I moaned and shuddered in response, burying my face in the crook of his neck. 

"It's convenient to be able to rely on him around you. Someone you won't quickly be able to beguile, or seduce."

I huffed—as if I had been around anyone other than Hux long enough to even try—but I smiled, too.

"No, you're right about that," I said, thinking about what it had taken me two encounters with the man to realize. "Taka always looked down on men like him. But you don't mind, do you?"

Hux shrugged. "Why would I? He's good at what I need him for, and he stays in line. That's all that matters to me."

"I need to pee." I could feel both amusement and annoyance at my candidness in Hux, and I suspected that was a combination of emotions he'd very much come to associate with me.

"Fresher is through there," he pointed at one of three doors leading from the room, and I slipped out from under the covers.

———

"What is that?" I asked a few minutes later, looking at a square, titled hole in the refresher floor. It was several feet wide, with stairs leading down on one side, a drain in the middle, and a sort of ledge, maybe a bench, along each wall, that made it look a bit like a booth in a cantina.

"The bathtub," Hux answered casually, and I stared. He must have seen the shocked look on my face because I could feel his amusement.

"Of course," he said, leisurely. "Am I right to assume that, on Iridan, not even Gorat could afford to fill such a space with clean water?"

I shook my head.

"Do you want to see?"

I nodded, then reconsidered.

"Will it be cold?" I was intrigued by the thought of enough water to float in…Taka had a tub that fit us both, and I had fucked him in it many times. But this space was wide enough to fit five people easily and deep enough for me to stand in the middle with water up to my collarbone.

"No," Hux assured me, and I felt his arms sneak around my waist, his chin resting on my shoulder. "It'll be warm. Hot even, if you like. Although I'd prefer a temperature at which I might join you."

"Me, too. How long will it take to fill up?" That only got me a snort, then Hux moved away and bent down to press a few buttons. Water began to run from thin slits on each wall, and I watched in amazement as the space started to fill up so fast, I could watch the waterline climb an inch every few seconds. Despite the massive amount of liquid pouring from the walls, the flow was whisper-quiet, and I could see steam rising from the surface.

"Come," Hux said, holding out a hand, and I took it, carefully following him down into the tub, now almost full. The water was heavenly: clear and warm and soft against my skin. I marveled at the luxury of it all.

"Is this what you grew up with? This huge apartment, silk sheets, a 'bath' big enough to drown in?" Smiling, I had meant it as a teasing comment. But Hux's face darkened, and suddenly I was worried I had said the wrong thing. But, after a moment, he regained control of his emotions before he simply said, "No."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean—" But he interrupted me immediately.

"I know," he said, as he sat down on the ledge I had rightly guessed to be a bench, then reached out to pull me onto his lap. "These were my father's quarters when he was Commandant here. He ran the officers' academy, until the death of the Emperor changed everything." I was surprised: Of course, I remembered what Hux had told me about his parents. But somehow, I had assumed his father had been a student at this academy, a young man carried away by his lust for a pretty servant. But a commandant taking whomever he wished made sense, too, I supposed.

"After that, it only took a few years before the newly formed Republic laid siege to Arkanis, and my father and I had to evacuate. I grew up on ships, and the occasional base, hidden in the Unknown Regions from then on."

"Was that when your mother…" I wasn't sure if I had the curate to put into words, but Hux had no such qualms.

"When she was executed? Yes," he said and reached over to shut off the water, before rearranging me on his lap, so I was facing him. "If she had conformed then, she'd still be alive today. In a way, what happened to her was her own fault."

Yeah, I could see that. I knew it was part of my genetic design that I wasn't able to get pregnant, and I was always glad of it—one less thing to worry about—but never more so than when Hux talked about his mother and how getting fucked that one time had ultimately cost her her life.

"How old were you?"

"About five."

I tried not to stare. Half the age I was, when Taka had taken me away from my mother. Well, the woman I thought of as my mother, anyway. I wanted to tell Hux that I was sorry. Almost did, too, but I knew him better by now.

"So, why are we here?" I asked, instead. "Why come to Arkanis? Do you have friends here? Allies?"

His lip twitched, and I could tell he was pleased.

"I do indeed," he said. "Ren is an arrogant fool, unable to bind people to him in any other way than keeping them too scared to oppose him. But when we destroyed the Hosnian System and the Republic with it, we knew a few systems were open to joining us willingly. Just too proud to do so without at least the pretense of negotiations. Many less advanced planets needed a more forceful hand…and I will grand you, Ren shined at unleashing his wrath and bringing them into the fold. But centrist planets, like Arkanis or Coruscant? All they wanted was to save face, the illusion of choice. And since Ren is all brute force, but hopelessly inept at diplomacy, the task of bringing them into the fold was given to others. With my father's name still well remembered here, securing Arkanian allegiance fell to me. And, while the crew members of the _Finalizer_ were those most loyal to me among the First Order, politically I'm not without friends. With a bit of luck, I'll be able to rally enough support to show Ren that I won't be pushed aside this easily."

"Can I help?" I asked and was met with confusion.

"I…how would you help?"

I shrugged. "The pheromones set people at ease. It makes them suggestible, sometimes, definitely more relaxed. And if that fails, I can fu—erm…have sex with them? To make them happy. I did it all the time for Taka—" then I stopped. 

There was a look on Hux's face, calculating, as if he were contemplating something that hadn't occurred to him before. And I knew what that meant.

"You already have someone in mind, don't you?" I asked, and his expression told me I was right.

"There is someone, yes. He bid a rather substantial sum for you, once. Since I ignored his offer then, I did not count him a likely candidate to support me. But, perhaps together, we can change that." His thumb stroked along my lip, so I opened and, holding his gaze, sucked its tip into my mouth, teasing it with my tongue. A deep breath and a very pleased look in his eyes was my reward. Then he pulled back and brushed a lock of hair from my face in a surprisingly tender gesture.

"Can you swim?" Hux asked, totally surprising me with the change of subject.

"I…no. How? I doubt there is enough water to fill this tub on all of Iridan." It was an exaggeration, of course, and we both knew it. Hux just smirked.

"Do you trust me?"

"Of course," I said. It was true, even if I had little choice in the matter.

Hux stood up, taking me with him, guiding my legs to rest around his waist, and then took us out into the pool's deepest part. I'd still be able to stand here, I knew, but I liked this game enough to play along. Tightening my legs around his waist and grabbing onto his shoulders, I feigned nervousness.

"You won't let me go?" I asked demurely, and the tug on Hux's lips told me I had hit a bullseye.

"Never… as long as you please me." His hand fisted in my hair, and I moaned as he pulled to tilt my head and scrape his teeth against my shoulder, causing goosebumps to spread over my skin. I could feel his erection grow too, gently nudging up between my legs. But I had never been this deep in water, ever, let alone while fucking, so I wasn't sure what to do.

"Guide me?" I asked softly and watched a satisfied expression spread over Hux's face before he freed his hand from my hair and grabbed my ass instead.

"Gladly," he said, lifting me with one hand while using the other to place his cock against my pussy. Then he let me sink down on him, and I moaned at the sensation of being filled—impaled, really—my weight resting mostly on his cock, but supported enough by the water for it to not hurt at all.

"Can you move?" he asked, and although I wasn't sure, I tensed my legs and tried. Thanks to the water, it was surprisingly easy, and _fuck_ was it nice to be surrounded by liquid warmth while sliding up and down on Hux's cock, feeling it press against all the right spots. I moaned, dropping my head against Hux's shoulder.

His hand was back in my hair, pulling just enough to make my scalp tingle as I moved, and I was torn between the strain in my legs, the sweet pain it caused, and the felling of Hux sinking in and out, which was just too damn good to stop. I slowed slightly in the up and down, shifting my hips instead, to press my clit against his pelvis—and while it felt like heaven to me, it was not enough for Hux.

With one hand on my hip and the other on my waist, he turned us around, water sloshing about, till I felt the ledge underneath me. Positioning me there, Hux began to drive into me with more force, and I cursed in pleasure as I came. I had just enough brainpower left to notice that Hux enjoyed fucking in water as much as I did because where he usually held out, this time, his release followed only a few seconds after mine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cari suggested 'Morgasm' as a name for this chapter. xD I loved it but thought it gave too much away. ~_^
> 
>  **About Arkanis:** I was going to send Hux and Lala off to some other planet because I find Arkanis a little overused in Hux-fiction. I mean, he was only about five canonically when Arkanis fell to the New Republic, and he and his father had to leave, so I'd argue the planet does not hold as much significance to him as some fanfiction writers seem to think.  
> But in the end, it's a planet most of you know, it's the location of the academy that Brandol Hux was famous for running, it's a centrist, First Order friendly planet and—most importantly—I really, really liked the idea of throwing Lala into an environment that was as different from Iridan as it could get (short of a planet covered in ocean, like Ahch-To or Mon Cala… and why the heck would they go there?)  
> So I kept it.


	27. Bargain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux sees the chance to gain an important ally and has no qualms about using Lamees to do it. (Tiny trigger warning for references to, hm, let's call it "forced prostitution")

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to add two more chapters to the overall number to incorporate this storyline. I hope that's ok with y'all. ^_^ Also, I know I'm not exactly brilliant at writing plot chapters…but this idea really tickled my fancy, so I gave it my best. 
> 
> And fyi, if I had to cast an actor for Allegiant Vice General Thanis Sindian, Jason Isaacs would be my first choice. ~_^
> 
> (This chapter happened so suddenly, it has not yet been edited)

Instead of going about his day and leaving me to my own devices, Hux surprised me with an offer to show me around the academy. Needless to say, I was thrilled. As usual, fresh clothes had been left for me: soft boots this time, and a blue-grey, gaberwool dress, both sparingly embroiled with white and blue pearls. This was certainly more elegant than anything I had ever owned, and probably worth more than everything I had ever worn combined. So I was not surprised when Hux, once he was dressed in his uniform, took his time to appraise me.

I was rather flattered by how much interest he showed in my appearance, especially when he remarked on the face paint I had worn the first time we met. I explained that the fine, silver lines were a specific pigment Taka had bought for me and which I had been taught to draw patterns on myself. Hux promised to see if he could find something similar for me here.

As we began our tour, Hux explained about the fortress around which the academy had been build, and which had been raised by an alien species long since extinct. Atop and around those old stones rested the modern buildings, three of them, surrounding a wide, open space Hux told me was used mainly for training exercises. But all I saw there at present was a herd of about a dozen nerfs, contentedly grazing on the lawn and utterly unperturbed by the slight drizzle.

Behind the lawn was a sheer drop, and beyond that lay a sea as grey as Hux's eyes, with waves frothing over sharp rocks. I knew what an ocean was, of course, but I had never seen one, so I asked if we might go down to the beach. Hux shook his head.

"The Arkanian seas are full of dangerous predators. Refuse from the academy and the tower attracts them, and they lie in wait for anything stupid enough to venture down to the shore," he explained. "Sometimes, a nerf calf will wander down there, to lick the salt off the rocks, but they never return."

"That tower?" I pointed toward a massive, old-looking structure a few dozen meters out on the sea. "What is it?"

"It was part of the ancient fortress and now houses some of the more intense cadets' programs. They're dealing with delicate material there, so we won't visit."

 _Pity,_ I thought. I would have loved to set foot on an actual island, even if the winds churning up the waves around the old stones seemed frightfully strong.

"And you say the weather here is always this stormy?" I asked, and Hux smiled with derision.

"This? Some drizzle, light winds? A mild day," he said, stepping up behind me to point over my shoulder. "Do you see those gullies and furrows carved along the walls, the gutters along the roofs? They are all needed to deal with the heavy downpours we have here several times a week. Without them, the place would flood, and the lawn would turn into a marsh." His hand was resting on my waist, and I leaned against him, grateful for his warmth.

"It's hard for me to imagine enough rain coming down for the water to become a problem," I admitted.

"Preferable to two scorching suns, I think," he stated, in that voice of his which left no room for argument.

Part of me wanted to agree: between the thick, green forests and the nerfs grazing peacefully on the lush grass, it was obvious how much life was made possible by all this water. "If only it was a bit warmer," I said, blowing into my cold hands and rubbing them together.

"We'll get you some better outwear. Gloves, if you'd like. I just didn't think…" he trailed off as he leaned over me, taking my hands into his and massaging gently to stimulate the blood flow.

But I could guess what he'd been about to say: "You didn't think you'd let me out of that apartment any time soon, did you?" I could feel his smile as his lips brushed against my neck, his breath warm on my skin.

"I thought it wiser not to call any attention to you," Hux confirmed, "but since you've so graciously offered to help me find support, I've reconsidered. I'm not someone to let assets go to waste."

I didn't quite know how to answer. I had not forgotten what I had said this morning in the bath, just managed to push it to the back of my mind. But, while the thought of fucking strangers made a knot form in my belly, I comforted myself with the certainty that Hux would not send me to someone who might seriously hurt me. Still, a shiver raced up my back, and while I hoped it might be blamed on the cold, with Hux standing this close, he immediately knew better.

"Don't be scared," he whispered into my hair.

"I'm not." His touchingly soothing tone made me feel ashamed of my weakness, and I turned in his arms to look up into his eyes. "I'm really not. You show me who you need to help you, and I will make sure they do. Whatever it takes. I promise."

"Good girl." The smile on his face was calculating but pleased, and it made my stomach flutter. "Come," he said and stepped back to offer me his arm.

Hux led me through the academy's many hallways, guiding me from one building into the next over a skybridge, until we reached a hall, big as a hangar, its high walls ringed by walkways. It was one of these balcony-like structures we emerged onto, so we had a good view of the entire place. Groups of young adults were occupying different spaces, and I quickly realized that this was an indoor training area and all the young people cadets. They were all dressed neatly in light-grey training suits, which set them apart from the occasional officer watching their progress.

Hux directed my attention toward a climbing wall on the opposite end, where a handful of cadets were trying to reach the highest point, their efforts hindered by small, hovering droids shooting stunrays. Then he pointed out the officer observing them.

"That's Thanis Sindian," Hux explained, "Engell charged him with overseeing the academy's transition from the destroyed Republic into the hands of the First Order. I expect he hopes to become its Commandant, once the process is complete."

While Hux spoke, I studied the man below: he was noticeably older than Hux, perhaps about Taka's age, definitely old enough to have served in the old Empire. He was of Hux's height, I judged, more compact in his build but still fit. When he turned, I could see a hooked nose dominating his face, the rest of his features angular and even. He had blue eyes, too, like the General. But while Hux's were often influenced in coloring by their surroundings, these were pale and bright—and piercing, even from up here.

"He wouldn't be the worst choice," Hux went on. "He's ambitious, flexible, and a soldier through and through. Started his career in the Empire, then went on to serve in both the Arkanian and the Birren fleets. He is not of the Elder Houses by birth, but married a younger daughter of the Sindian family and took her name for the prestige that came with it. The girl was about your age then but died shortly after. I'm not sure of what. He's never remarried, so he was allowed to keep the name. But he has had mistresses and has never been shy about it. That should play in our favor."

That confirmed what I had already strongly suspected: This was the man whose allegiance Hux was hoping for, and which I would have to give my best to secure.

"How should I address him? Is he a Lord?" I knew titles like Lord, Lady, or even Prince and Princess were not uncommon among the Elder Houses. But Hux told me otherwise.

"His proper rank is Allegiant Vice General. But if you call him General or Allegiant General, you'll please him more."

"So, his rank is lower than yours? But you're younger than him," I said, and Hux gave me a dry smile.

"I'm so glad you noticed," he said, and I tried hard not to roll my eyes at him. "There was a time not too long ago when my station was unquestionably above that of a General. But with Snoke dead and Ren in power, that is no longer the case. Which is why we're here, and why this will be very important. I trust you to do your part, no matter…" He trailed off, and I sensed there was perhaps more he wanted to say. But it was important to me that he knew he could rely on me, so I spoke before he could.

"No matter what. I know. I'll make him happy for you, I promise. I can handle him." I said it with more bravado than I felt. But Hux seemed pleased, smiled at me, said, "I know you will," and my heart beat a little faster.

"Sindian will likely not be pleased to see me, so don't let his pettiness be a distraction," he advised.

"You mean because you rejected his offer for me?" I asked, curious.

"Among other things. But I'm sure, once he realizes that I'm not unwilling to accommodate him in certain ways—"

"You mean, _I_ won't be unwilling to accommodate him." There was a dark flash in Hux's eyes, and it occurred to me that interrupting when I could feel this underlining tension in him was not a smart move. "I'm sorry," I whispered quickly and tried to disarm him with a smile. It worked.

"Once I have—with your help—convinced him that there are things to be gained by supporting me," Hux allowed, "he should be pleasant enough."

Offering me his arm again, Hux led us down a steep set of stairs to join the officer beneath. I wasn't troubled by heights, usually. But the slim, open steps had no railing, and I was grateful for being able to hold on to Hux as vertigo threatened my balance.

When we reached our destination, Sindian turned to us and feigned surprise, a fake smile on his face, which utterly failed to reach his eyes.

"General Hux! I heard rumors about you gracing us with a surprise visit," he said. His voice was deep, slightly raspy, and not at all unpleasant.

"Vice General," Hux answered—cooly, I noticed. But perhaps Sindian did not, for his eyes had been drawn immediately to me.

"Allow me to make introductions." Hux didn't miss a beat. "This is Lamees Rylani Dellos," he said, and I let go of Hux's arm's comfort to step toward the other man.

"Lamees, meet Allegiant Vice General Sindian."

"An unexpected pleasure," Sindian said, taking hold of my hand and bowed down as if to kiss my hand, stopping just short of touching my skin with his lips.

"The pleasure is all mine, Allegiant General." I just so managed a smile. Hux had said something—obviously without meaning to—that had thrown me so much that it was hard to control my face. But now was not the time to dwell on it.

Instead, I was glad that the descent down the stairs had frightened me because, combined with the nervousness I felt at wanting to please Hux, I knew my pheromone production had kicked in. It was clearly written on Sindian's face as he refused to let go of my hand and used this as an excuse to stand unnaturally close to me, and perhaps it was also the reason he did not notice my sudden spell of confusion.

"You're surprised to see her?" Hux asked, and the Vice General nodded.

"Yes, I have to admit: After everything, I expected you would try and hide her charms away," Sindian confirmed, not taking his piercing eyes off me.

"Oh, I'm not parsimonious with her charms, Vice General. It would be a shame to let such talent go unappreciated. And 'assets not utilized, are assets wasted,' as my father used to say."

"Hm," Sindian nodded. "The man did have a certain wisdom." He turned fully to Hux before he spoke again, but did not take a step away from me. "I'm sorry I did not meet you at your arrival, General. But I had already left for the night. You did not give us much warning."

"True," Hux acknowledged. "I hear you reside at your late wife's family estate, outside Scaparus Port, these days?"

"That is so. I thought it presumptuous to occupy the Commandant's quarters without having earned the position. And what a lucky coincidence, now that you're here." Even I could tell it was meant as a jab at Hux.

But the General only nodded graciously, "It has proved convenient for us, to be sure."

The two men were so stiff around each other, I thought I might suffocate. "Tell me, Allegiant General," I said lightly, to break the tension, "all these youngsters. They're under your care?"

"They are, for now," Sindian said in his melodic voice. "And I have hopes, should my efforts here please the Supreme Leader, that it might remain so."

"Oh, yes," I said. "Having had the pleasure of meeting Supreme Leader Ren in person, I am sure he'd appreciate an honest commitment to strengthen his ranks with reliable officers."

"Yes, exactly," the Vice General said, "unlike those who might question his decisions."

 _Uh-oh_ , I thought, as I noticed Hux's aggravation spike.

"And yet," I tried to salvage what I could, "following a leader blindly would not be in anyone's interest. Every leader has their strengths. But also their faults. And only the truly foolish would reject tempered, honest counsel?"

"That is an innocent assumption," Sindian said, a wicked gleam in his eyes, "which could get you in a lot of trouble, young lady."

"From the mouth of babes…" Hux interjected. Sindian turned to him.

"You have a grievance with the Supreme Leader's recent decisions?" he asked, and it was plain he had already guessed why Hux was here on Arkanis.

"The Supreme Leader can be—hasty when it comes to certain things," my General explained. "He does not have the patience to deal with numbers. But after our recent losses, I would, humbly, suggest he reconsider decommissioning the _Finalizer_. And not just for sentimental reasons on my part."

Hux stepped closer before he continued, and I instinctively moved out of Sindian's reach—for now. "It would mean so much if you were to join your voice to mine in this, Vice General. As a friend, eager to utilize assets to their full potential. A beneficial arrangement, I think, where friends offer support to each other."

"Support, yes," Sindian agreed. "And in turn, assets might be shared, also."

"'Sampled' might be the better word," Hux cautioned.

"Sampled?" Sindian mused.

"Yes, sampled," Hux said sternly. "For now. To give friendship time to prove its perseverance." 

Sindian gave a calculating look, which Hux met evenly, the ghost of a smile playing around his lips. The accordance passing between the two men was obvious, and I was not at all surprised—but very relieved—when Sindian's expression lightened. I could see wrinkles deepen on his face as, for the first time, his smile reached his eyes.

"Why don't you both join me, later tonight, at my family's estate? A more comfortable setting for friends to discuss mutually beneficial arrangements…"

"What a wonderful suggestion," Hux said, a satisfied look on his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cliffhanger. 0_0' But you'll see why. I wrote both chapters parallel, so the next one should be on time come Monday. (Or even on the weekend. Comments do motivate writers to post more often, you know… ~_^)


	28. Interlude 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Despite knowing of certain dangers, Hux delivers Lala to Sindian, trading some time with her for the Vice General's support. (Trigger warning for a bit of rough stuff)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> While I have no qualms about writing non-con or dub-con, I want to keep this story from getting too dark. So, while there will be viciousness and non-con elements, I chose to make this chapter an Interlude and keep things less ~~traumatizing~~ explicit.
> 
> Huge thanks to CariSilver, who not only edited this chapter, but also had the idea for this plot. ❤︎

Hux watched while the tailor droid performed a few last-minute adjustments on Lamees' Onderon silk dress. He had considered Shimmersilk, as it had once been popular among rich Imperials, and the light purple would surely suit Lamees' skin tone. But the deep purple of Onderon silk would have to serve instead: There was simply no sense in spending several thousand credits on a dress which—knowing Sindian's tastes—would soon be ripped to shreds.

Despite her fear of droids, the girl made an effort to stay calm as the machine operated its needles mere inches from her skin. And it was worth it because, once the droid retreated, Hux could see that the silk now hugged Lala's figure in all the desired places, presenting her breasts without being too obvious, clinching at her waist and flaring at her hips, leaving the wide, slit skirts to flow about her legs.

The First Order found beauty in symmetry, not extravagance. But the same was not true for Sindian, who had picked a wife purely for the wealth and glamor that came with her bloodline. And who had bid an outrageous sum for Lamees, Hux was sure, because she was exotic and expensive, not because he was looking for a companion to sweeten the lonely nights of a widower.

This was why Hux had decided on an eye-catching look for Lamees tonight: a revealing dress, red lips, and dark make-up to emphasize her eyes. He had also instructed her hair to be curled, the dry ends softened with fragrant oils, and then pinned atop her head, leaving a few locks free to frame her face. It was all more flamboyant than he himself would have preferred, but the girl certainly wore it well.

"May I ask you something?" Her voice pulled Hux out of his musing unexpectedly, but he nodded.

"You introduced me as Lamees Rylani Dellos…"

"Yes? That _is_ the name listed in your papers?"

"It…is?"

"Yes?" Hux didn't bother to hide the impatience he felt.

"I'm sorry. I just didn't realize I had a last name. Let alone…" She trailed off, but her meekness had utterly taken the wind out of the sails of his annoyance.

"Did you not see the name when you signed the documents on Batuu?" he asked, trying to sound patient and not as dumbfounded as he felt.

"I…I guess I was too excited to notice?" How could she have overlooked something like this? "You said it was the name on my papers. So, Taka…?" She seemed unsure of how to phrase her question, but Hux understood.

"Gave you your mother's name? Yes, he did," he answered, watching her closely.

"Oh," was all she said to that. But Hux could see something in her eyes, a spark of tenderness. And that was not at all a sentiment he wanted thoughts of Gorat to inspire in her.

"It was most likely a convenience, Lala," he said firmly and saw with satisfaction how the spark was, if not extinguished, then at least dampened. "Even salves are supposed to have family names. To make it easier to trace their lineage." He stepped over to her, gently lifting her chin so she would look up at him. "But you are not a slave anymore. So carry her name proudly."

At that, her eyes lit up again, and Hux smiled, brushing a lock of hair away from her face. Early on, he had recognized Lamees' mother as a topic the girl commonly sought to avoid, since it brought up memories both painful and cherished. Something he himself could relate to. And something he had noted as useful, should he ever need to manipulate her.

But such thoughts were quickly pushed aside by the pull of her pheromones, strengthened by her fear of the droid, or maybe her nervousness about serving Sindian. With time, Hux had become more used to the effect, but that had not made it any less enjoyable. Letting his hand drop from her face, he caressed the top of her breasts, nicely pushed up by the tight bodice of the dress and rising and falling with every deep breath Lamees took. The girl shivered under his touch, her skin as sensitive as ever.

Pity that there was no time to take her before delivering her to Sindian. After, he expected, she would need at least a night, perhaps a night and a day, to recover. The curve of her neck, beautifully presented by her pinned-up hair, caught his eye. And the longer he looked, the more pensive Hux became.

"Is something wrong?" Lamees asked, sounding nervous. He had stared at her for so long the girl had begun to fidget.

"No," he said, "I was just wondering if it would be safer for you to wear the collar again. It's a clear mark of a slave, and…we don't want anyone to guess you're no longer that."

A look of apprehension came over her face.

"Taka never made me wear one," she tried, "nor did he my mother. And I've seen many slaves without it—maybe more than I have with."

"Alright," Hux sighed, feeling like a tenacious child had just persuaded him to surrender a treat. "You have convinced me. As long as you behave, the collar can stay off."

Lala beamed at him, then took his face into her hands and stood on tiptoe to kiss him. Hux could not suppress a smile, but he only allowed her a second or two before gently pushing her back.

"We can't be late," he explained, then slipped into his greatcoat and offered her his arm. As they left, he could feel her take a deep breath, stealing herself against what lay ahead.

———

The speeder ride to the Sindian estate outside Scaparus Port took less than half an hour. A storm was expected later tonight, and the wind had started to pick up, but in their heavily armored vehicle, it was barely noticeable. Opan, whom Hux had ordered to accompany them, in case complications arose, and to escort Lamees back once her work was done, was sitting in front with the driver.

The girl attempted to engage him in conversation a few times, but Hux wasn't in the mood. When she didn't get the hint after two tries, he sharply told her to keep her mouth shut and concentrate on the task before her. Perhaps that had been a bit too harsh, for when they arrived, Lamees remained quiet and subdued, to the point that Hux began to wonder that he had needlessly complicated their endeavor. But he needn't have worried: As soon as Sindian received them in what looked to Hux like a large parlor, Lala broke into a smile, and just as she had yesterday, drew the Vice General into meaningless small talk while she let her pheromones do their work on him.

Hux allowed them a few minutes while he took in the parlor, which was just as ostentatious as Hux had expected from this place. The walls were paneled with silvery, grey wood, the floor covered in thick rugs, and the doors so ancient they needed to be operated by hand. The furnishings were just as outdated, made of black wood and inelegant in their heaviness. When he turned back to the pair, Sindian offered his guests drinks, which Hux declined for them both, then invited them to take a seat in the sitting area.

Hux sat down in one of the heavy armchairs, but Lamees surprised him when, instead of choosing one of her own, she sunk onto his chair's armrest. As he glanced over at her, he saw that she had positioned herself in a way that made the slit in her dress expose a good part of her leg to Sindian, who, in turn, was blatantly admiring the view. With a slight smile, the General leaned back and placed his hand on her hip, to show that she had pleased him.

There was some more tedious small talk Hux had to endure before they finally got to the point, but once the real conversation began, Sindian proved himself blunt. The Vice General would do his utmost in convincing the Supreme Council members he had access to that it would be a waste of a good ship to allow the Finalizer to be decommissioned. He would also see if officials of Arkanis could be persuaded to contribute funds toward her repairs, as a gesture of appreciation for all Commandant Brendol Hux had done for the academy in his days.

In return, Hux would give his support to Sindian when the time came to select a new Commandant for the Arkanis Academy, once its transfers into First Order hands was complete. But for now…

All it took was a meaningful look and a nod, and Lamees slid from her place at Hux's side to approach the Vice General.

"Since it might be a while before your generous support can be met with the gratitude it deserves, Allegiant General," she said, her voice low and deep, "maybe you'll allow me to show you the appreciation you deserve in the meantime?"

"You can have her for an hour," Hux added without further preamble.

"An hour? Seems like a very short time to have with such a lovely creature," Sindian argued, and Hux saw Lamees give the older man a smile that managed to look shy and coquettish at the same time. "I had hoped you'd leaver her with me for—"

"Three hours, then," Hux interrupted before the man could demand Lala stay the night. "You can have her for three hours because I'm feeling generous." Sindian gave him a sharp look, which Hux countered with a calculated smile. "I could surely be persuaded to trust you with her for a night or two. Once our friendship's had time to prove itself."

Hux did not truly expect Sindian to give in this easily, and he was right.

"I would hate for you to just sit around and wait here, General. Surely, you'd be more comfortable back at the academy, and I'll have her delivered back to you in the morning," the older man tried. But Hux had no patience for it.

"Oh, I won't stay," he clarified. "Captain Opan will, and he'll be expecting her back, Vice General, in three hours."

Sindian grunted in reply, then reached out to take Lala's hand and pull her toward him.

"And she'll do what is asked of her? Whatever is asked of her?" His words were directed at Hux, but his eyes were studying Lamees as she sunk down on his lap with a smile, her hands smoothing over his uniform jacket. There was open hunger on Sindian's face now, and Hux knew they had him.

"She will," he said, the same moment Lamees said, "Gladly, Sir."

"She knows what's good for her," Hux added cooly and could see both Lamees and Sindian glance at him. She managed to keep her expression neutral, but a sinister smile spread over the Vice General's face. Then the man caught both of Lala's wrists in his hands, and Hux could see his knuckles turn white as he squeezed. The girl's eyes grew wide with fear, and she gave a soft whimper.

"Did I do something wrong, Sir?" she asked timidly, but Sindian's smile only grew darker.

"No, pet," the man assured her, then leaned in to whisper something in her ear that made her breath hitch and her face grow pale.

For a moment, Hux hesitated. There was a knot in his stomach, suddenly, and the fake smile on his face had frozen into a grimace. But Sindian was too busy inhaling Lamees' pheromones to notice, the girl leaning into him as he mouthed her neck. Hux's view was somewhat obscured, but he still saw how Lamees flinched, heard her suck in a breath. The older man chuckled and growled something too low for Hux to make out, and when he pulled back, Hux could see a bright red mark on Lala's skin, just where her neck met her shoulder.

Hux thought back to the moment he had considered putting a collar back on Lamees. He had told her it would cover up the fact that she was no longer a slave. What he had actually thought was how it would serve well as a reminder to Sindian that she was Hux's property and as such not to be damaged. He had also thought about the locator embattled in the collar, and how he had not yet found the time to come up with another way to place one on the girl. He had not thought Sindian daring, or foolish, enough to try and steal the girl away. Or make her disappear. But watching him with her now, how his hands clammed down on her wrists, causing her to whimper and squirm, the thought was suddenly gnawing at him.

"I do not want her damaged, Vice General," Hux said sharply, but the other man just chuckled.

"I have a medical droid here, on stand-by," he drawled lazily. "There won't be a mark on her. You have my word."

 _No visibly ones, you mean,_ Hux thought, torn between achieving his goal and the urge to protect what was rightfully his. Lamees had assured him that she would be able to handle Sindian. But perhaps Hux should have been more diligent in warning her about the man's reputation, the mistresses he was said to have used up, the sudden death of his young wife, rumored to have been a suicide. Lamees had made that quip about being 'willing to accommodate' him—and that should have been the moment to warn her about how little her willingness would matter to Sindian.

Balling his hands into fists until his nails cut into his palms, Hux rose. He had set his conditions, so there was no reason to stay. The faster this began, the faster it would be over with, and he could soothe Lamees once she was safely back with him at the academy. It might take some time to win the girl's trust back after. But if Sindian, with his connection to the Elder Houses and to Generals Engell and Quinn, were to support him, there was a good chance to save the _Finalizer_ —and with her his dignity—from Ren. Surely that was worth a few bruises.

The General had almost made it to the door when a strangled cry from Lamees made him freeze, then, against his better judgment, he turned to look. Sindian had twisted the girl's wrist so curly she had slipped off his lap onto the floor.

"My Lord, please…" Hux heard her plead, then the sound of a vicious hit. And it was not the loud slap of an open hand, but the dull thud of a closed fist.

"Don't 'my Lord' me," Sindian growled. "I'm an officer, and you will address me as 'Sir'."

"Yes, Sir. I'm sorry, Sir…" Hux could hear the tremble in her voice.

"Well, you're not sorry yet, pet." The Vice General said wickedly. "But you will be. In three hours, if you're not the sorriest piece of ass in this sector, then you'll certainly be the sorest."

Hux forced himself to turn away from them both and take another step toward the door, out of this situation, away from her pleading whimpers and Sindian's growled threats. But when he squeezed his eyes shut to block out the ghastly scene, the image of Lala's face appeared seared into his eyelids. And not the last, terrified look he had seen on it, but the light in her eyes when she had thought about her mother.

"Stop." The word sounded choked and raw, and for a moment, Hux wondered if he was not simply telling himself to stop this foolish mawkishness.

Then there was another pained yelp from Lamees, and Hux knew.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I might have to come with something different to call these chapters. 'Interlude' doesn't sound right when the chapter is nearly 3.000 words long. ^_^'


	29. Blame

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux makes a decision that could have dire consequences.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope this makes up for the cliffhanger from last time. All the love to [CariSilver](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CariSilver) who gave me the idea and did the editing this chapter.

"I said, stop!" Hux's voice reached me through a fog of pain, and I felt confused since I hadn't actually heard him say anything in a while. In fact, I had thought he had left by now. And it seemed so had Sindian because there was a flash of annoyance on his face. All I could really think of was how I wished the Vice General would let go of my hand…not only had he bent my wrist so far backward, a human joint would probably have snapped by now; he also had a crushing grip on my fingers. I had already felt one sickening pop, so when he straightened in his chair, pulling my hand with him, I couldn't help but whimper. As I looked up, I saw Hux coming toward us, his face pale with rage.

"Let go of her," he ordered, his voice deceptively calm, and I still didn't quite understand what was going on. Had he changed his mind?

"Come again?" Sindian said but released his hold on me.

I cradled my hand against my chest as pain stabbed through my fingers. Then Hux pulled me up so quickly, I struggled to get my feet under me. There was a sharp ripping sound as I stepped on my dress and tore the skirt. And just when I found my footing, the hand on my arm suddenly disappeared.

With surprising speed for a man of his bulk, Sindian had risen from his seat and reached for Hux. I stumbled a bit as the General let go of me to turn toward his attacker and so only heard the scuffle that followed. If you could call it that, since it only took a few seconds. Then the two men stood perfectly still, facing each other. I couldn't really see what was going on, but it looked like Hux was holding something at Sindian's throat which had caused the older man to freeze.

"When the Supreme Leader hears about this—" the Vice General hissed, but Hux interrupted.

"Yes, I'm sure he'll be delighted to hear how you were willing to side with me over him—all for a few hours with a pleasure toy."

Taking a step back, Hux waited to see if the other man would make a move to stop him. When all he did was stare in hatred, Hux turned, took hold of my arm again, and dragged me with him to the door. Luckily, he knew how to open the ancient thing, because even with my full wits about me, that mechanism would probably have given me trouble. Outside in the corridor, Opan snapped to attention.

"We're leaving," Hux announced, never breaking his stride, and if Opan was surprised, he managed not to show it as he fell into step behind us.

When we reached the front door, I caught a glimpse through the large windows and saw that the wind had picked up even more, and thick raindrops had begun to fall. Hux turned back to the Captain.

"Get rid of him," was all Hux said.

Opan seemed to hesitate, and, once I realized what Hux was ordering him to do, I wondered if he would refuse. After all, Hux and Sindian were of near equal rank, and Sindian at least a decade Hux's senior in service.

"Are you sure? Sir?" There was a question in his tone that made Hux's anger flare.

"Yes, I'm bloody sure," he snapped. "Now go, get rid of him, and any surveillance footage that shows we were here tonight. And hurry, before your tardiness causes me even more trouble."

I wasn't sure why time was so important to Hux, but I wasn't stupid enough to ask. Unceremoniously, the General pushed me out into the dark, guiding me through the rain with his hand on the small of my back. Cold water hit my face and neck, and the silk of my dress whipped about in the gale, so I was glad when we reached the shelter of the vehicle we had arrived in. It was the first speeder of its kind I had ever seen, heavily armored instead of open and topless, but perfectly suited for turbulent weather like this.

Careful not to use my hand or hit it on anything, I climbed inside. Then I spent twenty minutes wondering what had gone wrong, what I had done wrong, for the evening to turn out like this. Had it been my noises of distress which caused Hux to change his mind? I knew why I had not held back, but maybe Hux didn't understand. Remembering what Sindian had said, how he had whispered to me that he had read about my pheromones and knew ways to bring them out 'even a miscreant like Gorat would never dare imagine' made my stomach turn. But I had promised that I would get him to support Hux, and I always gave my best to keep my promises.

After a while, I began to shiver, and even though I thought that was more nerves than cold, I was grateful when Hux pressed a few buttons, and warm air started to blow from an unseen vent. I mumbled my thanks, but Hux did not acknowledge me, making it clear that he was even less in the mood for talk now than he had been on our ride here.

Stony silence followed us from the speeder all the way into the apartment. Once there, Hux tore off his gloves and unhooked the collar of his uniform jacket. Then he went over to a cabinet, poured some amber liquid into a tumbler, and drank it down. Not sure what to do with myself, I just stood there, feeling lost. If Hux blamed me for what had gone wrong, he'd surely let me feel it.

"This was a mistake," he began, confirming my dreadful suspicions. "I should never have let you talk me into this."

I thought it wisest not to answer for now. There was a dull throb in my wrist and in my cheek, which I was sure would soon show a lovely bruise. But the worst was still the fingers of my non-dominant hand, which I carefully hid from sight.

"You said you'd be able to handle him. Growing up with Gorat, I thought you'd be able to endure a little pain, not that you would break so easily!"

 _Now, wait a minute,_ I thought, stung by how unfair that was.

"It's not like I asked you to come back for me," I defended myself. "I didn't even realize you were still there—" The last part was mumbled more to myself. I didn't want to risk hurting Hux's ego by admitting that I lost track of his whereabouts while my wrist was being all but broken.

"Not in words, perhaps but…the noises you were making." He sounded almost as if he were in pain himself.

"What? No! I was just…showing that man what he wanted to see," I tried to explain. "If men want to hurt you, and you don't let them see that you're in pain, all they do is keep making it worse until you—"

"Shut up!" Hux had never really raised his voice to me before, and when he did it now, I couldn't help but flinch. He was so angry, I automatically lowered my head and braced myself for a slap. Instead, he turned his back to me. I realized that I had hit a nerve with my words and remembered the cold hate Hux had felt when he talked about his violent father. Had my words dragged up some buried memory of abuse?

While his back was turned, I could hear him taking a deep breath and felt how he tried to calm himself. He was really making an effort not to take his anger out on me, which was very different from what I had expected. This, combined with the fact that I had unwittingly provoked his anger even more, and that the night had gone so horribly wrong, made my eyes burn with the guilt and shame I felt at it all. But, knowing how much Hux hated it, I tried my best not to cry.

"Lamees," he began, turning back to look at me. And naturally, just as he stepped toward me, a tear escaped anyway. Hux saw and froze. Anger rose in him again, and again I could feel him pushing it down for my sake. "Lala," he tried, sounding even more gentle this time, and I frantically wiped my cheek.

Hux pressed out a breath, then his hand was on my chin, gently lifting my face. He didn't say anything at first but bared his teeth in anger as he examined the marks on my cheek and on my neck.

"We'll put bacta on that," he said.

"I don't think I need bacta. Just some ice—" Bacta was expensive, and Taka would never have used it on a simple bruise. But at my words, Hux's mood had darkened again, so I lowered my eyes and shut my mouth. Then he reached for my hand, but I flinched away.

"Lamees," he said warningly, as I tried to hide my injury behind my back. "Show me."

"It's fine, really. A bit swollen, that's all." It was maybe the first outright lie I had ever told to Hux. And he knew.

He didn't repeat himself, he didn't threaten me, he didn't try to grab my arm by force. He just stood there, looking at me, until I broke under his penetrating gaze. When I finally placed my hand in his, he was surprisingly gentle. It didn't even look that bad: Both my wrist and last two fingers were red and swollen, and there was a visible lump around the second joint of my pinky finger. I might have been able to pass it off as a strain, but…

"Bend your fingers," Hux instructed. I gave it my best, biting the inside of my cheek to keep from making a noise. But I already knew that my pinky wouldn't bend, nor straighten all the way.

" _Why_ would you try and hide this from me?" Hux asked through clenched teeth.

"I just…" I had to gather my courage to admit what I was afraid of because I knew Hux would think it silly. "I didn't want you to summon a medical droid."

For a moment, Hux stared at me. "What is it with you and droids?" he finally asked, sounding exasperated.

"I can't feel them…" I whispered. But apparently, Hux hadn't understood me.

"What? Speak up!"

"I can't feel them," I repeated, louder this time. "They don't have emotions, so I can't feel them. I can never tell if they're going to help me or hurt me!" I might have gotten a little more intense there than I had meant to. But Hux allowed me my outburst.

"Calm down," he said, "no medical droid, then. I think we can handle this on our own for tonight."

Before I had a chance to ask what he meant by that, he had firmly taken hold of my hand with one of his, then pulled on my pinky while pressing down on my joint with the other. There was a tiny pop and blinding pain.

"Fuck!" I screeched, and my good hand pushed against his shoulder in reflex, then fisted into his uniform jacket.

"You're alright," Hux soothed. "It wasn't broken, just dislocated."

It didn't feel to me as if the word 'just' belonged in that sentence. But once the searing stab was over, the rest of the pain lessened into a dull throb.

"Thanks," I mumbled with tears stinging my eyes, and Hux gave a humorless snort. Maybe that had come out sounding more sarcastic than I had intended. "No, I mean it. Thank you."

Hux nodded. "Try to hold the joint still for now. I'll find a brace and get you something for the pain. Cadets here train in basic first-aid, so there should be plenty of supplies." He studied me for a moment. "You should go wash your face and run some cold water over that finger. Do you think you can handle that on your own?" he asked, not unkindly.

"Yeah, I'll be alright," I said, then remembered something. "Actually, could you help with my dress?" The gown was closed by several hooks in the back, and while it was easy for me to reach those, I wasn't sure if my injured hand would able to undo them.

"Of course." He turned me around and, with sure hands, undid the fastenings, then brushed his palms over the exposed skin. Only it wasn't sexual. Instead, there was a tenderness in him that made my heart swell.

"Go," he ordered softly and, fighting the urge to turn and throw my arms around him, I did.

———

By the time I emerged from the fresher, my face washed, and dressed in one of my usual night shifts, Hux was back. He handed me a small glass and said, "Drink."

"What is it?" I asked, sniffing the clear liquid.

"Something to help you sleep. And with the pain."

I wasn't sure if I wanted to be drugged… I felt like I had only just gotten my emotions under control a bit, and an intoxicating substance might mess that up. But when I looked back at Hux to see if I might get out of drinking this, he gave me a stern look, so I tossed it back. It was so bitter, I shuddered.

Sitting me down on the bed, Hux then set to encasing my fingers in a cast with his usual brisk efficiency, snuggly securing my pinky to my ring finger. He also had a look at both my wrists, but there was no swelling, and although they felt a little tender, the redness had receded under the cold water.

Next, he produced some kind of numbing agent for my bruises. While focused on applying the gel to my cheek, I snug a look at him. He seemed absorbed in what he was doing, but the drugs had started affecting me, and when his gaze flicked from my cheek to my eyes, I wasn't quick enough to look away. Then I grinned.

"What?" he asked, and my grin widened.

"You drugged me. Again."

He stopped what he was doing, lowered his hands, and gave me a sharp look. "After what happened today, how can you joke about that?"

"I don't know," I said honestly, my brain a little foggy.

Hux shook his head, snorted, and then gently guided me to my feet so he could pull back the covers. "Get in," he said, and I gladly slipped under the heavy comforter and snuggled into the sheets. Instead of getting undressed and joining me, Hux lay down next to me on top of covers, facing me. I could have looked into his eyes like this forever. But the drugs made me ever more drowsy, and soon my eyelids began to drop.

"You'll kill him, won't you? Sindian? Or, I mean, you'll have Opan kill him...for what he did to me?" I asked Hux because I had been wondering about that, but also in an effort to stay awake a bit longer.

"No, not for what he did to you," he said softly. "We need him dead before he lets Ren know where I am and especially what I'm doing. The Supreme Leader probably thinks I've run somewhere to hide, with my tail between my legs. The longer it takes for him to realize that's not the case, the more support I will have found against him."

"Will we have to leave here?"

"Not if Opan does his job quickly enough."

"And if he doesn't?"

"If he doesn't, we need to make sure no-one realizes you're not a slave anymore. Right now, Opan, you and I are the only people alive who know about the new contract. So, I need you to keep your mouth shut."

"Sure," I said and noticed my speech had begun to slur. "What about the solicitor from Batuu?"

Hux gave me a calculating look. "He's dead." That took a moment to sink in.

"Accident?" I finally asked, my voice strangely high in my ears.

"Sudden illness, I hear." There was cold derision in Hux's words and a slight smile on his lips as he brushed a lock of hair away from my face.

A chill raced up my spine.

 _Fuck me,_ I thought, then whatever Hux had given me really kicked in, and I fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Will Hux be nice from now on? Hmmm, probably not. ~_^


	30. Storm (E)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lamees wakes up, scared and alone. When Hux returns, something isn't quite right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After her first read-through, Cari told me that the middle part of this chapter reminded her of the song "Glow" by Okkervil River, from their album _Black Sheep Box_. And now that I have listened to it a few times, I have to admit that she's right. ^_^ It fits pretty well. So, if you like music with your fiction, you can find the song [here.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9UznsyVnHbU)

I woke with a start, my heart hammering. It was one of those moments when you _think_ you were woken by a loud noise, but can't be sure, because you don't remember what the noise sounded like. Blinking, I tried to get my bearings.

Outside, sheets of rain were coming down so hard I could barely make out the tree line. And inside, it was so cold I shivered despite the heavy comforter. When I looked around in the dim light, I realized with a start that I was alone and Hux nowhere to be seen. Then there was a flash, illuminating the room for less than a second, and I recognized lightning the very moment a tremendous thunderclap followed. I knew thunder and lighting: Iridan's sandy atmosphere was often plagued by electrical-storms, due to tiny particles building up a charge as the hot winds blew them high and rubbed them together. But I had never seen such a torrent of rain before.

Normally, I would have found watching something like this exhilarating. But I still felt sore from earlier, groggy from the drugs, and, most importantly, without Hux there, I suddenly felt more scared than excited by the tempest raging outside. Shuddering, I sat up against the headboard, pulling the covers up to my chin, and decided to wait until Hux returned. Since I didn't know how much time had passed, I expected he had gone into the fresher to shower and change. But the longer I waited, the less I was convinced he was even in the apartment. Plus, I felt relatively clear-headed—tired but not drugged. So, whatever Hux had given me seemed to have worn off. Surely, even in a Zeltron, that would have taken at least an hour…

Trying to calm my racing heart and shivering both, I sat there and waited. I had counted five thunderclaps so far, and right after the sixth, the door to the bedroom opened. It was almost silent, compared to the pneumatic doors on the _Finalizer_ , but I still made me jump. In the doorway, backlit by the overhead lights in the living area, stood Hux. Since the cone of light fell directly on the bed, he could probably see me better than I could him, and when he spoke, he sounded surprised.

"You're awake?"

"Mhm," I mumbled. "The storm woke me up."

Hux stepped into the room, and I could hear him take a breath. "It's just a rainstorm, Lala. Nothing to be scared of."

 _Urgh_ , I thought, _fucking pheromones._ How they always gave away when something scared me, simply wasn't fair.

Hux turned on the bedside light, and I could see that he was still dressed in his uniform, even his greatcoat. And that he looked soaking wet. His hair had come undone from its usual severe backcomb, too, a few strands falling into his face. And they were begging me to reach out and brush them back into place.

"Were you outside? In that?" I asked as Hux shrugged out of his coat, carelessly throwing it onto a nearby chair. His gloves and belt followed. All this was so unlike the usually uber-correct General it gave me pause.

"I think I got in before the worst of it hit," he said, sitting down on the bed to take off his boots.

"What were you doing out there?" I was so glad he was back, I didn't really care where Hux had been. Yet, he must have had a good reason to brave a weather like this, and I was a little curious, too. And, while I had expected to feel lust in him, stirred up by my body-chemistry, his arousal was overshadowed by something else. Something that must have weighed heavily on his mind, for me to feel it block out almost every other emotion. But instead of explaining what had happened, or where he'd been, Hux just undid the collar of his uniform.

"Nothing you need to worry about," he said, and I could hear from his tone that I would be wise to let the subject rest. "How are you feeling?"

"Better. Thanks," I said, honestly. _Now that you're here._ But I didn't say that part out loud.

He nodded, and I suddenly realized how tired he appeared. No surprise, maybe, since it was the middle of the night, and from the looks of it, Hux hadn't gotten any rest yet. So, I pushed back the comforter and moved over to him, to help him out of his uniform. Despite the heavy coat he'd worn, his jacket felt damp to the touch as I reached over his shoulders to open the hooks that ran down the front.

The tiniest of groans rose from his chest as I leaned over him. "I didn't realize you'd be this scared by a little weather," he said lowly, and I gave a humorless laugh.

"It's been a long day," I explained, just as another thunderclap made me flinch.

Once his uniform was undone, Hux turned and pulled me into a kiss. I couldn't help but smile against his mouth as my hands snuck into his jacket. They were so cold, I trembled, and pushing them into the warmth under Hux's clothes felt really good. To me, anyway.

Not so much to Hux, who drew in a sharp breath.

"Stars, woman, your hands are like ice," he complained, even though his thermoshirt was still separating my skin from his.

I shrugged.

"It's really cold in here…" I protested. "That's hardly my fault!"

"No," Hux allowed with a slight smile, "it's mine. I set the environmental controls to cool down five degrees during the night."

"Why?" I asked, surprised, and I could see a flash of amusement on his face.

"I did the same on the _Finalizer_ ," he admitted, "only there I raised the temperature during the day cycle, to be a little closer to the climate you were used to, and let it drop back to standard during the night."

"But, _why_?" I asked again, smiling now, infected by his mischievousness. And glad, too, that the overbearing shadow I had felt lying over his emotions had been somewhat lifted.

"Because," he began to explain, "sleeping next to you is like sleeping next to an overheating generator." His voice was soft as he leaned in to kiss along my neck. "And it has the added benefit of ensuring you stay close to me during the night."

What I had meant to be an exasperated sigh turned into a moan as Hux carefully sucked on my skin. I also noted that, despite his complaints, Hux had not bothered to remove my hands from under his jacket. Smiling, I hummed in contentment as his fingers stroked along my sides, then over my breasts, and I felt arousal rise in him, now at the forefront of his mind. But, as his hand came up to cradle my face, something caught my eye: there were stains on his skin and clothes, dark in the low light.

"Is that…blood? Are you hurt?" I asked, suddenly unnerved, but Hux shook his head as he pulled back.

"No, I'm fine—careful!" His warning came right as I attempted to push back the sleeve of his jacket to check his arm. And a second later, I saw why: There was something long and sharp cleverly hidden between the lining and the outer fabric.

"What is that?" I asked, intrigued. I could tell it was some sort of knife as I pulled it free, but I had never seen its kind before. The blade was elegantly slim, black, and gleamed wickedly in the soft light.

"Insurance," Hux said, taking the knife with sure hands and putting it aside.

"You had that at Sindian's throat, didn't you?" I asked, remembering. "I hadn't realized you cut him…"

"It was just a nick," Hux said, dismissively.

The amount of blood I could make out looked like more than a nick to me, and I didn't remember seeing Sindian bleed at all. But then, I had been pretty out of it, so there was a good chance I simply didn't remember correctly.

"How is your hand?" he asked, and I couldn't help but feel like he was trying to distract me.

"Uhm, the finger hurts a bit, but it's alright," I said and watched as Hux shrugged out of his jacket and then threw that aside carelessly, too, before he reached for me again. But instead of pulling me closer, he took hold of my chin and tilted my head to inspect the bruise on my cheek. It made a dark anger rise in him that scared me a little. So, I decided that it was now my turn to distract him. Carefully, I took his face into my hands and kissed him, and just as I had expected, his arousal quickly overwhelmed the fury that had threatened to rise.

Only then he hesitated.

"This will be the one time," he said, "you are allowed to say no to me, and I'll understand."

His words sent a thrill through me. Since I had always been enthusiastic about having sex with Hux—as long as is was actual sex, not frantic humping—it had never occurred to me to deny him. Or what he might do if I tried. The idea that he might force me should have terrified me, or at least turned me off. But somehow, it did the opposite.

"No, I want you…but," I hesitated, not sure if I had a right to ask this because he regularly did it when we had sex, and I knew how much he enjoyed it; but my wrists still felt sore, "could you not hold me down this time? I don't mind you doing it, normally, but—"

"Shhh," he interrupted me gently, "of course," and I drew him into another kiss. After a moment, his hands tugged on my shift, and we broke apart long enough for him to pull it over my head, and me to rid him of his shirt. I also opened his pants, my mouth back on his, but Hux stopped me as I tried to reach inside. His grip was very gentle, though, and high on my arm—almost at my elbow—to avoid my wrists. Then he rose to push off his pants and, just in his basics, properly climbed onto the bed.

"Lie back," he directed me, obviously avoiding to push me as I had asked, and I did. His eyes remained fixed on my face, like they so often were during sex, as he took hold of my panties and began to drag them down. I lifted my hips to make it easier, and once they were off, they joined the rest of our clothes on the floor.

As he climbed back over me, I realized that Hux didn't need his hands to pin me down: his eyes did that quite efficiently enough on their own. Even as his gaze left my face and wandered between my thighs, following his hands, which gently spread my legs apart, I didn't dare move. Only once his knuckled brushed along my lower lips did I squirm a little. He did it so softly, it tickled.

"If you don't want me to hold you down, you'll have to hold still on your own," Hux said, warningly, but I could feel it was an empty threat. I groaned as he dragged his knuckles up the inside of my thigh, leaving a trail of moisture in its wake that instantly began to cool on my skin. It was in stark contrast to the heat of his mouth on my other leg, as Hux slowly began kissing his way from my knee downward. I fisted my hands into the sheets to keep them from grabbing his head and pushing it down to where I really wanted him, and once he got close to the spot on his own—it felt like it took forever—I squeezed my eyes shut and focused purely on the physical sensation.

Despite the difference in our body temperature, his breath felt warm on my core. Then cool as he blew on me, making it plain how wet I was already. And then there was heat as his tongue slid along my entrance. As he reached my clit, the sensation was so intense that I let out a high pitched noise in surprise and pleasure.

"So responsive," Hux mused, and I could feel the airflow of his words on my very sensitive skin. "Always so responsive."

Then his tongue was back on my clit, flicking against it once, before he sucked the little nub into his mouth. My hips, desperately seeking more of his heat, lifted so high that my ass left the mattress. Hux made an amused noise, but I whined at the loss as his mouth left me.

"Hold still, or I'll stop," he threatened, and even though I moaned, I tired to relax enough to do as he bid me. My reward was his hot mouth back on my clit, and two prodding fingers in my cunt.

And his fingers had plenty of experience down there by now. But combined with the heat of his mouth, the sucking on my clit, it felt like all it took was a few seconds before unstoppable pressure started to build inside me. Spasms racing up my spine and through my legs heralded the coming orgasm, and I began to mutter curses and pleas as my toes curled in pleasure. In his usual way, Hux dragged out my orgasm as long as I could stand. And longer, relenting only when I lifted my head and started begging him for mercy.

As I fell back against the mattress, sweetly exhausted, he was gone from me for a moment. Then I felt him crawling up my body, nestling in between my legs. When I opened my eyes, I saw a predatory smile on his face just before he kissed me. Moaning, I opened my lips and greedily sucked on his tongue, tasting myself.

"Still cold?" he asked when he broke away and somehow managed to make it sound like a completely innocent question. Covered in sweat and still panting slightly as I was, I couldn't help but smile up at him.

"No," I admitted. "You?"

He sighed, absentmindedly stroking my breast, the pads of his fingers circling my nipple and making it tightened and rise. "It's hard to be cold in your presence, Lala."

"The thunder has stopped," I realized suddenly.

"Yes, a while ago." I could hear and feel his amusement at the fact that I hadn't noticed this sooner. Then he bent his head and sucked my nipple into his mouth. I moaned, but just as I felt him position his cock at my entrance, I remembered something I had been burning to get off my chest.

"Wait," I said softly, and to my surprise, even though the effort it took made him groan, he did. "I just wanted to say thank you…"

At that, he looked up, breathing deeply, as he struggled not to drive into me, and I felt like I had to explain what I meant more clearly. "I just mean, for not selling me. To someone like Sindian. I would rather be with you on a ship than end up with someone like him. So, thank you."

I heard him press out a breath before he growled, "And don't you forget it," but his harsh tone was strangely at odds with his emotions, which were full of tenderness. There was little of that tenderness in his actions, though, as Hux finally drove into me with one, strong thrust. The intrusion was so complete it was almost painful—just not the bad kind of pain. Moaning into his mouth as he kissed me, I arched my back to press down on him, making him groan again.

My swollen clit screeched with joy as it was squished between us, and I happily let myself go as Hux took his pleasure form me with hard strokes. By the time his pumping got more erratic, I was pretty close again myself. But it was late, and it had been a long day, so I didn't blame him when he didn't hold back, just moaned and did my best to press down on him as he came. He groaned and thrust a few more times, riding out his orgasm, before he stilled, his weight resting heavily on my chest.

"Am I crushing you?" he asked after a moment, already pushing himself up on his elbow, but I just smiled.

"Yes, but I don't mind."

Hux huffed out his amusement, but repositioned himself anyway, pulling me close and nuzzling his nose against my neck, before he fell into an exhausted sleep. Fascinated by how quickly he had blacked out, I wiggled around a bit to free the comforter from under me, then pulled it up to cover us both as well as I could. It was still fucking cold in here, after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The 'knife' hidden in Hux's sleeve is the monomolecular dagger mentioned in _Star Wars: The Last Jedi: The Visual Dictionary._ Kudos to everyone who figured that out last chapter. ^_^
> 
> Btw, since Celsius is based on the temperature at which water changes its state of aggregation and Fahrenheit is based on "That's the body temperature of a healthy cow", I chose to make Hux talk in Celsius. ^_^


	31. Knights

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lala makes a discovery, which Hux refuses to talk about. While the General goes off to make preparations, Lamees is confronted by a surprise visitor.   
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Knights of Ren, y'all. Turns out, they're kinda fun to write. ^_^  
> 

I woke the next morning just as Hux got up and disappeared into the refresher. Burrowing into the sheets against the cold, I closed my eyes and tried to go back to sleep. The grey light still showed unfriendly weather outside, and I could have used some more rest: Hux had been tossing and turning all night, another thing unusual for him, and had pulled me out of my dreams quite a few times. Unfortunately, whatever Hux had given me the evening before must, at last, have worn off completely because my wrists and hand ached even more than they had yesterday. And my stomach had started to grumble, too, reminding me that my last meal had been quite a while ago. So, after a bit of turning this way and that, I gave up and decided to rise.

Only, when I leaned over the side of the bed to retrieve my shift, I noticed that it, as well as all of Hux's clothes, had disappeared. I had to smile. Hux never left things lying around, ever. And what he didn't fold and put away, send down the laundry chute, or placed in the laundry collector in the 'fresher here, a cleaning droid would soon righten, stow, or replace. And for someone who _looked_ like he was wearing the same every day, Hux certainly went through an amazing amount of clothes in a week.

I looked around and, spotting a throw on the foot of the bed, I wrapped myself in that. Normally I wouldn't have minded going about naked—only the other day I had—but somehow I felt extra chilly this morning. Perhaps it was a bit of leftover unease from yesterday, or maybe the unfriendly weather, with winds still whipping about the leaves outside and a steady rain coming down.

Wrapped up and on my way to the 'fresher to join Hux, my eyes fell on his greatcoat. It felt so out of place draped over a chair, that I ran my hand over the wool as I went by, and I noticed the luxurious material was still damp. Knowing the gabberwool would wrinkle if it dried in this position, I picked the heavy coat up and, retrieving a hanger from the closet, hung it up on the closet door. It was so heavy, lifting it sent a twinge through my injured wrists and hand, and as I smoothed out the fabric I noticed something curious. When I pulled my hand back, it was tinted a reddish-brown, especially the brace on my fingers. Puzzled, I looked at it for a moment, rubbing at the stain until I realized what had happened. There was so much blood on the right side of Hux's coat, the sleeve and shoulder especially, that it had not dried during the night and had rubbed off as I smoothed out the fabric.

I was still processing this as Hux came out of the 'fresher. I looked over to him, already dressed in his uniform, with his hair back in its usual, severe backcomb. And I guess the uncertainty I felt at my discovery was showing on my face because his eyes flicked quickly from me to the coat and back before he drew a breath and approached.

"The cleaning droids will take it way, and the laundry will clean or replace it," he said, matter-of-factly. As if a soiled coat was the issue here.

"Will you tell me what happened?" I asked, since by now it was clear, even to me, that this much blood could not have come from his altercation with Sindian, even if he had nicked him worse than I remembered.

"No," was Hux's curt answer, and I wasn't stupid enough to ask again, just lowered my gaze, swallowed any further questions I had, and nodded. "But I have something else to discuss with you. Come," he went on and then moved into the living area, gesturing me to follow. When I did, I spotted the collar he had made me wear and only recently taken off on Batuu lying on the table he was heading toward. And I froze.

"It's just a precaution," Hux began as he picked the damn thing up. Then, as he turned and noticed that I had lingered at the door instead of following him all the way, his expression softened somewhat. "Lala, listen," he continued, his voice noticeably gentler, "I know you don't like wearing this, and I know why. But there is a chance—a good chance even—that Sindian let Ren know where I am, where we are, before Opan got to him. And if he did, if the Supreme Leader arrives here unexpectedly, then you wearing a slave collar will deter any suspicions that you were set free."

Hux had closed the distance between us as he spoke, and even though I didn't quite have the strength to meet his gaze, I could feel that he didn't mean me any harm. Which didn't prevent me from breaking out in goosebumps when his fingers brushed against my skin as he carefully placed the metal ring around my neck and let it click shut. It still fit as if it were made to measure, which perhaps it was: just wide enough for me to move without being hindered, but snug enough for the contacts of the electrodes to rest against my skin.

"It will protect you until our contract has reached the core, and no-one can challenge it," Hux said, and for a moment, I wondered: Surely, even from a small, outer-rim planet like Batuu, that should have happened by now? Then again, Hux knew more about these things than I did, and I trusted his word. And when he bent down to kiss the top of my head, I felt guilty for doubting him, no matter how briefly.

"There's more," he said, and I smiled up at him as he pulled away to show that I trusted him; but his face remained serious, "we might have to leave at a moment's notice. So, I need you to get ready and decently dressed without tallying. And then stay that way. No more prancing around in nightgowns. Clothes for you are in the wardrobe on the left."

I almost rolled my eyes at his words. _I don't prance_ , I thought but held my tongue.

"And stay inside these chambers. I'll have meals brought in. And I can try and find a medic to have a look at your hand, but I can't promise I'll have time to sort something out. Unless you want me to send you a droid?"

I looked up at him with wide eyes and shook my head. Dealing with a droid I didn't know, without him there? _No fucking way._

"Alright," Hux said. He was standing very close, and I fought the urge to press myself against him. It wasn't a sex thing—I simply would have liked to feel him as reassurance. Especially as the collar was lying uncomfortably against the spot where Sindian had bitten me, and where his teeth, although they hadn't broken the skin, had left a sizable bruise. "I have to go. Get dressed and stay ready. I might send someone to pick you up at any time."

I nodded and, after lifting my chin and kissing me one more time, Hux left.

I when into the refresher and did as he'd asked me to. I would have liked to fill the enormous tub once more and take a bath all on my own, only Hux had said not to tally, so I didn't. But, as it turned out, I might as well have, because it was late into the afternoon, three meals later, when the main door to the chambers opened, and someone other than a service droid stepped in.

Four soldiers in white, shiny armor arrived, and even though Hux had told me that he might send someone to pick me up, I felt a shiver travel up my spine as I looked at their hidden faces. Then another man stepped into the room, all dressed in black, with an oilcloth cloak over his armor and a skull-like mask obscuring his face, and I knew something was very wrong.

"Who are you?" I asked, taking a cautious step backward. There would be nowhere for me to run, of course, but perhaps I'd be able to buy some time.

"I was sent to collect you," was all the man said, ignoring my question, his voice sounding strangely hollow through his mask.

"I…" I was no great shakes at thinking on the fly, but I gave it my best. Quickly lowering my gaze in submission, I demurely said, "I was told by my master to stay in these chambers and wait for his return."

The black figure took a step toward me, and this time I didn't dare back away. There was something off about this guy, and it filled me with dread. He wasn't quite as tall as Hux but still towered over me as he came to a hold a mere hairbreadth from my face. And there was a strange smell, too, like burning leather and damp wool.

"You do not want to provoke me, slave," he said. I shook my head.

"No, Sir, I don't. I'm sorry," I answered, trying to sound as meek as possible, "but my master…"

Suddenly, there was a hand in my hair, and I was thrown toward the door so quickly, I could barely press out a startled yelp before I hit the floor. I hissed in pain as I had automatically reached out to break my fall, and the impact sent a stab through my finger and up my arms. The soft, woolen dress I wore made me slide across the polished ground a few inches until I came to a stop in-between the white armored soldiers. Two of them were filled with sadistic amusement, while the other two felt slightly disgusted. If that was because of the rough treatment I was subjected to or because of my weak response to it, I couldn't tell.

"Please," I begged, trying to push myself up on aching arms, but before I even made it to my knees, a boot appeared between my shoulders, pressing me down. "My master…"

"I was sent to bring you to _my_ Master," the man said coldly and put so much of his weight on me, it became hard to breathe. "And you will follow. Or I will break your legs and have you carried."

"No, please," I pleaded, "I'll come."

The boot between my shoulder blades disappeared as quickly as it had materialized and, my heart hammering, I started to rise. Halfway up, I was roughly grabbed and pulled the rest of the way so forcefully, I almost lost my footing all over again.

"Move!" The man shoved me roughly toward the door and, knowing there would be nothing but pain waiting for me if I fought, I tried my best to calm my shaking and move. Once we were out in the corridor, the man took the lead and I, flanked by the four soldiers, did my best to keep up with his purposeful strides. A few minutes later, we arrived at a door where two more men dressed all in black were waiting, and I realized that their choice of clothes probably indicated some sort of station or belonging.

"That her?" one of them asked. I tried to keep my gaze on the floor to avoid provoking any of them, but I guessed that the man who had brought me nodded as the man who had asked stepped toward me. "She's pretty alright," he said, and I forced myself not to move as his hand brushed through my hair. Staring blankly at his chest, I noticed a few differences between his attire and that of the man who had fetched me: he didn't wear an oilcloth cloak, a huge, wicked-looking knife was sheathed in easy reach on his chest, and there were several orbs attached to an ammunition belt slung over his shoulder.

The hand traveled forward from the nape of my neck to the metal ring of the collar, a single gloved finger stroking along my skin just below, coming to rest against the bruise between my neck and my shoulder. As the touch lingered, I gathered my courage and looked up. My eyes were met with the unreadable, frozen exterior of a helmet that featured several tubes, which might have been decoration or, possibly, designed to help him breathe.

"Tell me, do you beg them to stop when you're abused like this?" he asked, and I could feel in him the same dark, sadistic pleasure I had felt in Sindian and others before them.

"I do as I'm asked to by my master, or whomever he sends me to, my Lord." I had not forgotten Sindian's violent reaction to me calling him 'my Lord' and it took some effort to force the words out remembering that. But I had judged these men to be different—they were too untidy, their getup too individual, to be part of the military side of the First Order. Luckily, it turned out I was right, as I could feel a wave of pleasure and lust sweep through the man in front of me. But just as he reached out for me again, the man who had taken me from Hux's chambers spoke.

"Let her be, Ushar," he said, harshly, then turned to the third man waiting, "Ren in there?"

The man addressed gave a nod. "Yeah," he said, "Hux not in his quarters with her?"

"No. Maybe Vicrul will turn him up. Unless he turned tail and ran."

"Hm. Let her in."

At that, the man who had approached me turned with an access cylinder in his hand and unlocked the door. I wasn't sure what to do, but the man with a skull as his mask stepped up behind me and pushed me forward.

"Go on," he said, "the Supreme Leader is waiting for you."

Shuddering, I stepped inside.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I pictured the Knight sent to fetch Lala as [Ap'lek](https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Ap'lek), the one approaching her as [Ushar](https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Ushar) and the third as [Kuruk](https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Kuruk). But you can substitute any knight(s) you want. ~_^
> 
> Sorry about the short chapter and cliffhanger. It's only half of what I was planning to post today, but it was either this or nothing until Monday. σ‸σ


	32. Ren

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lamees has to face Ren and the possibility that Hux may have abandoned her to save himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm gonna be extra careful and warn you that Lamees gets roughed up a bit more in this chapter…and, if you have read ['You're So Cold'](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22551850), you'll recognize a few things, but keep reading! The plot is not the same, I promise!

The room I found myself in was bare and dark. It had similar floor-to-ceiling windows as the rooms I had come from, only angled inward, and with the weather outside still stormy and the afternoon wearing on, the light being let in was dim at best. Warily, I took a few steps forward, then stopped to scan the room. I could _feel_ he was in here, but it took me a moment to make out the figure crouching on the floor, looking out through the slanted glass. Even turned away from me, his raven hair and smothering presence made Supreme Leader Ren unmistakable. Not sure what to do, I stood with my head bowed, waiting for the man to acknowledge my existence.

"So," he said after a while, his voice as deep and melodious as I remembered…but Sindian's voice had been pleasantly deep, too, and the man behind it as vile as I could imagine. "Abandoned by your master to suffer in his stead?"

I wasn't sure what he meant. The men outside had spoken of the possibility that Hux had moved on and left me here too. But I hadn't believed them. Surely, after everything, not even someone as calculating and opportunistic as the General would do that? I thought it best to feign ignorance.

"My Lord?" I asked, since the title had worked well on the men who had brought me here. "I'm not sure I understand what you mean."

"Yes, you do," he said. "You just don't want to admit that he might have left you behind." Ren still did not bother to look at me, his gaze fixed instead on the gloomy weather outside.

And, at his words, filled as they were with an almost sadistic amusement, doubt finally began to grow in me. What _if_ Hux had decided to leave without me? What if he hadn't had a choice, once things with Sindian had gone wrong, but to flee here at once? Had he put the collar back around my neck to convince Ren that I was a slave, to be sold or used as he wished, so that, one day, I might have a chance to escape?

Finally, Ren rose and turned, and with a start, I realized that he might have been sensing my reactions with his powers, waiting for me to doubt Hux—maybe even waiting for me to reveal something critical in my anxious state of mind.

"Tell me, do you know anything about Hux ordering Sindian to be killed?" he asked.

"No, my Lord," I said softly. From what I had experienced last time, Ren's powers worked almost in an opposite way to mine: focusing on thoughts instead of emotions. So, I tried to keep my mind blank and concentrate on my racing heart, the sensation of its frantic beating, while lowering my gaze to the floor in submission, to avoid provoking him.

But as Ren stepped closer, and I felt the satisfaction in him, I knew I had misjudged. He knew I had lied.

"You know, don't you?" he asked, and I shuddered. "That I know you just tried to lie to me? Do it again, and I'll feed you to Ushar out there. My knights have no mercy, and I think you have guessed his tastes by now."

The one who had approached me, brushed his hand through my hair? Yeah, I guessed what his tastes were, alright. But Knights? What a curious thing to call men like them. As far removed from the knights my mother once told me stories about as I could picture. Ren didn't seem to need an answer.

"One more chance, then," he said. "The last one. Did you hear Hux order Sindian to be killed?"

"I…" I knew what I should do: The most sensible thing would be to affirm what Ren already seemed to know. That I had heard Hux order Opan to 'get rid' of Sindian. But what if he was trying to lead me into a trap?

"I couldn't rightly say, my lord." In a way that was as honest as it could be. Not everything about that night was clear in my memory, what with the pain of my injuries, and the surprise of Hux all of a sudden changing his mind and whisking me away. And, against all odds, Ren seemed to accept it as such.

"Captain Opan, do you know who he is?" he asked. Had he picked Opan out of my thoughts?

"Yes," I answered, trying hard not to make it sound like the question I felt it should be. Didn't Ren already know? He had seen us on the _Finalizer_ together…

"When did you last see him?"

"Last night?" Yeah, this time, it definitely sounded like a question. Like someone guilty being caught and not knowing exactly how to deflect attention away from what they were trying to conceal.

"He seems to have disappeared. Do you know anything about that?"

"I…no?" Now I was stumped. Disappeared? Had the General told Opan to leave after he was done with Sindian? To cover his tracks? To make sure the Captain wouldn't be there, couldn't be forced to give testimony against Hux?

"Why did Hux change his mind about giving you to Sindian?" Under Ren's gaze and his crushing presence it was a struggle to keep my thoughts straight.

"I don't know—" I tried helplessly.

"Did you ask him to?"

"No! No, I just—maybe Hux didn't know what Sindian was like before he agreed to leave me with him?"

"Doubtful. The man's tastes are notorious," Ren said with absolute certainty. "No, Hux knew what he was, and still, he sent you to him. So, what changed his mind?"

"I don't know," it was hard to process all this. Had Hux truly known in advance?

"Why were you suddenly important enough to him to risk everything for?" Ren pressed on.

"I don't know… I'm not important. I'm nobody. I—" I stopped.

There had been a weird reaction at my words. Nothing one would have seen, but definitely there. And as he looked at me, I knew that he knew that I had felt it in him. Quickly lowering my gaze so as not to provoke him, I felt, more than saw, him stepping toward me. And when he did nothing but stare at me for a bit, I finally couldn't stand it anymore.

"Please, don't hurt me," I whispered, genuinely afraid.

There was a knuckle under my chin lifting my face, so I looked up and saw that Ren was studying the mark on my cheek. As he ran his thumb along the bruise, the leather of his glove cool against my skin, a shiver raced up my spine. Then his gaze shifted and our eyes met.

"Don't fight me," he said, his voice low, almost seductive. "Don't try to lie to me. Just tell me what I want to know."

I nodded.

His eyes were strangely captivating…Deep and withdrawn, but also soft and somehow pulling me in. They made me want to trust him when he said he wouldn't hurt me, as long as I was open and honest with him. That feeling suddenly vanished as, instead of asking me another question, Ren broke eye contact and lifted my hand to study the brace on my fingers. I had to fight the urge to pull away because I wasn't at all sure he wouldn't press down on the tender joint and awake the pain all over again. But he didn't.

With my heart still hammering in my chest, I was also worried my fear would affect Ren the way it usually did men. Yet, even with him standing close enough that I could smell the leather of his gloves, the slightly burned smell of his clothing, lust was not something I was able to detect.

"I won't hurt you," he said, as he stepped back, then lifted his hand as if here was about to touch me again. But I recognized the gesture. And just like last time, memories were suddenly dragged to the front of my mind, of the night before, of Sindian whispering to me, and of Hux pulling me up and away from him. As Ren had promised, it didn't hurt, not really, but it still felt so uncomfortable, so intrusive, my eyes began to fill with tears.

"Stop, please," I begged in a whisper. I didn't want to see any of this again, and I didn't want to show Ren whatever it was he was looking for, didn't want to betray Hux that way.

"It's alright," he said softly, "I have seen everything I needed to know." Then his hand was back on my face, again carefully stroking over the bruise on my cheek, before it dipped lower and ran down my neck, coming to rest just above the collar. "All of this, and you still feel guilty about betraying him." His voice carried a hint of mocking contempt, but underneath I could feel something else, too. If I hadn't known better, I would have said it was envy.

But why would a man who was master over an army envy the General a single slave?

At that moment, the door hissed open, and when I looked up, scared it might be one of those knights, I saw Hux step into the room. His face was cold and unreadable, but I was flooded with relief: Ren and his men had been wrong. Hux had not left me behind after all.

"General Hux," Ren said, his gaze never leaving my face and his hand resting heavily on my shoulder, warning me not to move. "How good of you to join us."

"Supreme Leader," Hux said stiffly.

"Tell me, what am I to think, General?" Ren asked with an ironic undertone. "Several hours of surveillance footage from your personal quarters on the _Finalizer_ deleted. A member of the Elder Houses dead. And now a rouge captain, who has suddenly disappeared. Quite the accumulation of suspicious circumstances, don't you think?" Only at his last words had Ren finally turned his gaze from me to Hux, dropping his hand away from my shoulder, and I felt like a heavy weight had been lifted from my chest. But I didn't dare move.

"I have only just been notified about Captain Opan's disappearance," Hux answered. "And as far as the Vice General's tragic accident is concerned—"

There was a change in Ren, and I tried to throw Hux a warning look, but the Supreme Leader was already interrupting him. "There's no need to play coy with me, Hux. Sindian contacted me a few hours ago. He had…interesting things to say."

The lack of surprise I sensed in Hux made me think that, even if he hadn't known for certain that the Vice General had contacted the Supreme Leader, he had at least suspected.

"About me trying to find support against your decision to decommission the _Finalizer_? That was no secret. You know it's a mistake. I was only trying to find someone you'd be more willing to listen to."

"Inconsequential," Ren said, turning back to me. "I have made my decision and found you a new post. Loaning out your plaything wouldn't have changed that. Even if you had carried through."

"She is not…" Hux trailed off, but Ren seemed to have an answer.

"Not what?" he asked, with mock curiosity. "Not a plaything? Or just not for general use? Sindian seemed to assume otherwise. When we spoke, he was rather upset by your rude possessiveness of her. Bickering over toys is not what I expect from my officers, Hux. Maybe you need a lesson in sharing. Or perhaps things would improve if I removed her from the equation entirely. Let's see."

Ren took a step back, stretched out his hand toward me, and, suddenly, I couldn't breathe. And I don't mean 'his stare took my breath away'. I mean, I literally could. Not. Breathe. At first, it was the oddest sensation. I knew what my body was supposed to do, but it wouldn't. Something that had been an automatic reflex my whole life suddenly wasn't working.

My heart was still hammering frantically, and the rush of blood in my ears kept getting louder. But my chest felt tight and immobile. When I tried to consciously suck air into my lungs, all I managed was a pitiful hiccup. Fear turned into panic as pain began to throb through my head, my chest, my entire body. I probably tried to move with the unbearable urge to do something, _anything._ But Ren's eyes had me pinned, even as my vision began to turn dark. He was killing me, and he didn't even give me the chance to beg.

A dull ache in my legs told me I had fallen to my knees. Darkness and cold began to cancel out the agony in my body and my mind.

And all I could think about was how Hux hadn't done a damn thing to stop this.

———

I could breathe! It hurt—everything fucking hurt—but I could breathe, and I was alive; lying on the black metal floor, every muscle cold and stiff and tingling painfully, but alive. I sobbed once in relief.

"Get up." Hux's voice sounded far away, yet when my eyes opened, I could see his shiny boots were only inches from my face. I tried to comply, but my body felt stiff and unresponsive. And the more I moved, the more my head began to throb in painful protest.

I had barely managed to push myself up halfway before Hux lost patience, grabbed me roughly by the arm and pulled me up. My legs and hands were shaking, but I resisted the urge to hold on to him. Partly, because I could feel the rage coming off him, like dark waves, unlike anything I had ever felt from him before. And partly because he had just, a moment ago, stood by as Ren used his sinister powers to force the life out of me without uttering one fucking word in protest.

"Move," Hux ordered unnecessarily. He wanted to get out of here? _Fine, so do I_ , I thought as I began moving toward the door on shaking legs. The corridor outside was deserted. Apparently, I had been unconscious long enough for Ren and all his 'Knights' to have moved on.

The walk back to the apartment seemed to take forever, but at least, gradually, the pain in my head and the tension in my muscles began to ease. Hux was still radiating anger and frustration, which kept me a step in front of him until we reached his chambers. Since I didn't have an access cylinder, I stood to the side while he opened the door before, roughly, and unnecessarily, he took hold of me and pushed me through.

I had expected him to let go of me once we were inside, but instead, his grip tightened painfully on my arm, and he spun me around, his other hand closing around my throat. I had never felt fury like this in him before, and suddenly, I was scared. I didn't quite understand what I had done to deserve this, so I wasn't sure how to soothe him.

"Hux…" I whispered hoarsely, but his hand tightened around my throat and cut me off.

"Be quiet," he pressed out, and I whimpered, my hands clutching uselessly at his uniform jacket.

I was still reeling from almost having been suffocated and had little fight left in me. Especially against someone who, I had been foolish enough to think, was on my side.

Hux stood close, his lips almost touching my forehead, and took a deep breath. _Oh, fuck,_ I thought, very aware of my thundering heart, as his breath traveled along my hairline until he was nuzzling into my neck, his hand holding me in place like a vice. _No. No no no no no. Please. No…_ I was trying to get a grip on my fear, but I could tell it was too late. Everything I had feared my body chemistry would waken in Ren and hadn't, it now did in Hux.

"Please…" I tried again, but it was the wrong thing to do. Hux exhaled in annoyance.

"I said. Be. Quiet." His words hissed into my ear, full of malice.

Then, faster than I would ever have been able to react, his foot hooked around my ankles, and I was shoved to the ground. My back and head hit the floor hard, pain shooting up my spine and through my skull, and before I even had my breath back, Hux was somehow on top of me, straddling my thighs, my legs trapped between his. He was leaning over me, his hand back at my throat, breathing deeply. Then he started tearing at my clothes. I didn't try to fight him—I knew there was no point, and it would only stroke his anger. My eyes stung until there was something hot on my face, and I realized I had begun to cry.

"You have no idea," he said, as he was pulling up my dress, "what you've cost me."

Well, whatever it was, I thought numbly, it looked like he was going to take what he wanted from me to make up his losses. When he had my dress bunched up around my hips, Hux shifted, forcing his legs between mine. While doing so, he put so much pressure on my neck, my hands flew up to grasp his wrist out of instinct. I whimpered, from the pain and from fear, and from the sheer injustice of everything this cursed day had brought me.

Between my legs, Hux's free hand was fumbling with his clothes. I had felt his arousal against my thigh, fueled by his anger and my fear, and I resigned myself to what was about to happen. But I was unable to hold back a cry of pain as he put too much weight on my neck, the collar pressing painfully down against my collarbones. It felt like he was crushing my throat.

On top of me, Hux stilled. Then, all of a sudden, his hand was gone, and he had pushed himself up. My mind tried to catch up with what was going on as he stormed off into the bedroom, the door hissing shut behind him.

I pressed my hand against my mouth to muffle the sobs which had started to wreck my body and, not having the strength to get up, I rolled onto my side, pushing down my dress and curling into a tight ball of pain and misery. I don't know how long I lay there, cold slowly seeping into me. My sobbing had ebbed into soft, uncontrollable shivers and my head ached. But the worst was my neck, as every attempt to swallow sent a sharp twinge through my throat.

Eventually, I forced myself up, wiping at my face. Outside it was now fully dark, the bright lights of the room once again turning the floor to ceiling windows into one ghostly mirror. Avoiding my wretched reflection, I stood there, my hands shaking and feeling numb with cold, undecided as to what to do next. Slowly, I approached the bedroom door.

It probably didn't make much sense to seek out Hux after what had just happened, after what he'd almost done. But he was the only one who, I could hope, gave a fuck about me on this planet, in this whole damn sector. I realized with a start that, during the past few months, he had literally become the center of my universe.

The door was locked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once upon a time, this chapter was identical to the beginning of ['You're So Cold'](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22551850). But, obviously, I had to change quite a few things around. ^_^
> 
> Also—and I know this is not the nicest way to leave y'all, but—I might not manage to post on time next Friday. October is always a super busy time for me. And since so many of you wanted an Interlude to see how Hux feels about all of this (and because it will make a few things people might have already guessed at a lot clearer), the chapter needs to be written from scratch, unlike the two chapters that come after, which are already done. <_<


	33. Interlude 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux and Lamees are faced with the aftermath of the last two days, while stress and sleeplessness take a tole on their tempers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is a lot of exposition in this chapter, and I mean a lot. Sorry to those of you who find that boring. 0_0 Next chapter will be E-rated, I promise.

General Armitage Hux was sitting up against the headboard of his father's old bed, fruitlessly trying to concentrate on the report he had meant to read. But, after the second night in a row with very little sleep, the words kept blurring before his eyes, and his thoughts, annoyingly, tended to wander.

It was early morning, the forest outside still shrouded in darkness. If Lamees had any sense, she would be curled up on one of the couches outside, fast asleep—a thought that filled Hux with envy. That woman seemed able to sleep anywhere and through anything, the occasional nightmare that shook her notwithstanding. Yet, while dawn was still at least an hour away, he doubted that he would be able to get any more rest. Too many things were crowding his mind once again, and, as much as he hated to admit it, without the girl's soothing presence, sleep had eluded him for most of the night.

Eventually, Hux had given up and tried to distract himself with work instead. Ren's Supreme Council had issued several new decree in his absence, thirty more systems had seen sense and joined the First Order, and a number of smaller Resistance cells had been targeted, with varying success. There was a progress report from Taka Gorat as well, but Hux was in no mood to be reminded of that man and skipped it.

It would have been more convenient to do all this reading at a work terminal in the apartment's office, but Hux was not quite ready to face Lala and all the mess she'd caused. Especially, as one of the first things to catch his attention this very early morning had been the official order of his transfer to the _Steadfast_.

That was what he got for letting the girl talk him into anything. He should have just accepted Sindian as a loss and moved on. Arkanis, while not a central planet, was not without its prominent, influential residents after all, and he could have taken his pick from among them. Instead, he had allowed Lala to fill his head with ideas of how easy it would be to make Ren listen, once he had the support of a member of the Elder Houses, an Allegiant Vice General, and a possible candidate to take over the post of Commandant of the Arkanis Academy. And so Hux's own weakness had caused him to lose Sindian, having his plans revealed to Ren, and even forced him to terminate Opan.

An unfortunate necessity, and rather regrettable. For over a decade, the Captain had been among the most reliable of Hux's staff, with a sharp mind, a sure hand, and, perhaps most importantly, a predictable temperament. Not even learning that Opan had allowed Sindian enough time to contact Ren, something Hux had suspected but not known for a fact, had alleviated the foul aftertaste disposing of the Captain had left him with. But, since there had been little hope of Opan being able to withstand Ren's interrogation, the Captain had become a liability Hux could not afford.

So, he had asked the Captain to meet him for a debrief at the edge fo the training grounds, using the cliff's exposure during the storm and the subsequent difficulties it would pose to anyone who might try to spy on them, as a pretext. And, loyal as he was, Opan had appeared and given a short account of Sindian's constructed death while the gale raged all around them. Then, as the blade of Hux's monomolecular dagger slid in between the Captain's ribs, slicing through the man's lung and making it impossible for him to scream, Hux watched the expression in Opan's eyes shift from surprise to betrayal, to hateful resignation before they dimmed, pupils dilating in eternal surrender. After that, all that was left for Hux to do was tip the Captain over the cliff and watch as one of the creatures lying in wait for careless nerfs dragged the lifeless body into the sea.

When he returned to his father's old chambers, Hux had been surprised to find Lamees awake—he would take care in future not to underestimate her Zeltron metabolism when he drugged her—and even more so when she had willingly let him satisfy the urges her pheromones had woken in him, Opan's blood still on his hand. He had even managed to fall into an exhausted sleep right after, free, for a few hours, of the haunting image of Opan's eyes in that very last moment of the man's conscious existence.

Considering Sindian's rough handling of her, Hux had to admit a certain admiration for how quickly Lala had managed to move on. Not a word of accusation against Hux had passed her lips. Quite the opposite, it had seemed as if she felt the need to assure him that she would have suffered whatever Sindian had in store for her, as long as it would've helped Hux in his plan to secure than man's allegiance. And that it had been Hux, not Lamees, who in the end had failed to go through with it all bothered the General more than he cared to admit to himself.

Then again, Lamees clearly saw herself as nothing but a pleasure slave, still, accepting the fulfillment of baser urges as her purpose in life. But Hux had freed her from that, and—while his motivations were his own and had little do with consideration for her—as her obligee, her welfare was his responsibly. The very fact that she had thought she'd be able to handle Sindian was proof of how unfit she was to take care of herself. Sound judgment and self-preservation obviously were not qualities Gorat had put much stock in when raising her.

But what could be expected of an old pervert who had designed Lamees in a way that made her fear and pain cause the most sinister urges, even in men who usually felt no desire at all to force themselves on women? Just like last night, when Hux had almost—

The General blew out a breath and dropped his datapad on the bystand, finally giving up all hope of reading reports when his thoughts were this jumbled. What he'd _almost_ done last night, the way he had gotten carried away? It filled him with a shame so deep Hux had spent most of the night trying to push the entire thing from his memory. Yet, the pleading look in Lala's eyes, her face wet with tears, and, most of all, the tutored noise she had made. All of it had kept coming back to him whenever he had tried to close his eyes and fall asleep. It haunted him more than the expression of betrayal and cold resignation on Opan's face as the man died.

And that sharp, agonized cry of pain…

The same noise she had made when Sindian had crushed her fingers; when she had sunk on the floor, breathless after ripping apart perfectly good bedding in her cell, the prospect of facing weeks without sentient contact enough to make her try and starve herself to death. So animalistic, so desperate, so weak. So much like the noise he remembered as the last sound he had ever heard from his mother, as she was restrained by two stormtroopers and the butt of a rifle hit her in the stomach, while his father led him away.

Armitage had not yet been five and too scared to oppose the stern man who had come to collect him. The Commandant, who had let him see his mother one more time, the day she was placed against a wall and shot. The day Brendol Hux taught his only son that defiance was not an option and that the weak had no place in this galaxy, expect under his boot. A day it had taken Armitage close to thirty years to avenge.

But vengeance was patient, and the moment Armitage Hux was informed that his father had died, turned into pink sludge in a bacta tank, without anyone being able to figure out what had caused his skin, muscles, and, finally, his internal organs to dissolve, had been among the most exhilarating, most satisfying moments of his life. As good as feeling the pressure wave of Starkiller firing its first devastating salve of energy, knowing it would find its target within minutes and annihilate an entire system. All at his order, an authority granted to him by Supreme Leader Snoke himself.

Turning the ice planet Illum into Starkiller Base—mining its cyber crystal depots, borrowing into its core, webbing its interior with the necessary installations—all of it had taken over a decade. Gaining Snoke's trust and rising to the rank of General had taken most of his life.

And, of all of that, what did he have left?

Phasma, who had played a pivotal role in arranging his father's death, was dead, and Starkiller was destroyed. Both casualties owed to the Resistance, a score Hux meant to settle one day. And Snoke? Cut in two by a lightsaber, that much had been obvious, but still seated in on his throne, with the evidence of a devastating battle all around him.

Not even Ren could think Hux so dull as to accept that a mere girl, Jedi or not, had been able to take out not only Snoke, but his entire Elite Praetorian Guard, as well as Ren himself. And why would she have left Ren alive, unconscious as he had been, after killing everyone else? No, this carried all the signs of the new Supreme Leader's manipulation. The same way he had manipulated reports to make it look as if Ren had taken out the bridge of that Resistance cruiser. And the same way Ren shifted the blame for the damage the _Finalizer_ had suffered in orbit over Batuu on to Hux, when it had been Ren's faulty intel which had led them into a trap.

Hux had known, from the day they failed to eliminate what was left of the resistance on Crait, it would only be a matter of time until Ren's erratic temper and lack of finesse would cost the First Order its chance to truly rule the galaxy. Because while, to all appearances, the First Order was successfully filling the power vacuum left behind by the destruction of the Republic, it was evident to Hux that Ren utterly lacked the foresight and patience necessary to control this many systems at once.

The creation of the Supreme Council might have improved things, had Ren been wiser in choosing its members. Yet, in the current ones Hux saw only opportunists who were eager to carve themselves out a piece of power wherever their leader was too weak or too distracted to notice. The dream of a New Empire, the one thing Rae Sloane and Brandol Hux had ever had in common, was about to be ripped apart by clawbrids, while Ren was off casing after childish stories.

With a start, Hux realized that, whilst his thoughts had gotten darker and darker, the room had begun to glow with the cold light of dawn. A grim day lay ahead, he knew. And finding a way to settle things with Lamees after the last two days' unrest was just one of many unpleasant things that needed taking care of.

Rubbing his burning eyes, Hux got up, showered, and dressed. As he put on his belt, his eyes fell on the small, sliver remote to the collar Lamees was still wearing and, picking it up, he gazed at it for a moment before he let it slip into his pocket.

When he stepped through the bedroom door, he almost tripped over Lamees sleeping on the floor. For a moment, Hux paused. The room was cold, much colder than would be comfortable for the girl, and while he had thought a night spent on a couch without cover would serve her right, a night spent on the metal floor was another matter. What was wrong with this woman, this eternal child, to have such a poor sense of self-preservation?

At first, Hux felt tempted to wake her harshly, with a boot to her side. Then he thought better of it and crouched down next to her, shaking her by the shoulder instead. She groaned, causing Hux to pull back his hand. Then her eyes opened, and she blinked a few times, getting her bearings. As her gaze fell on him, there was, for a moment, hope and relief, not unlike what he had seen yesterday, when he had found her with Ren. She pushed herself into a sitting position, and perhaps it was the memory of last night coming back to her, or perhaps it was Hux's own stormy emotions, which he made no effort to hide, but the hope in her eyes flickered and died within seconds before she lowered her gaze.

Pulling himself up, so he towered over her, Hux stared at her for a moment, and, when she showed no reaction but sitting there passively with her head bowed, he sneered and turned away. Snoke had once called Hux a rabid cur, not bothering to wait until the General was out of earshot. But at least Hux wasn't a whipped dog, like Lamees, who, despite everything, still seemed to crave his approval.

"I…" she started timidly, and Hux would have liked to slap the meekness out of her. "I'm not sure what to say."

"Then keep quiet and go, clean yourself up," Hux said, perhaps a little sharper than she deserved. He was just so annoyed by her spinelessness. It looked like she was going to do what he had told her as she pushed herself up and turned to go. Only, then she hesitated.

"Fuck you." She spoke so softly, at first, Hux wasn't sure he had heard her correctly.

"Excuse me?" he said with as much warning as he could put into two words.

"Fuck. You." She repeated, more brazenly this time, turning to face him. "After everything I was ready to do for you…everything I _have_ done for you! You took me away from everything I knew. From everyone I cared about, everyone who cared about me—"

"Lala, stop." Again, Hux's tone was laden with warning, but the girl had started to ramble and seemed unable to stop.

"—for some stupid power-play, you ripped me away from my life. And I've done everything I could think of, let you do whatever you wanted—"

"Lamees!" Hux said, now reaching into his pocket for the remote. Obviously, the girl had lost control of her senses and was getting hysterical. And he wouldn't stand for it.

"If you care so little, you should have let Ren kill me," she spat, and it was the last star on his map. With the push of a button, he made her flinch. Then, when she looked up at him, still with that defiant look on her face, Hux swiped along the remote and activated the button again.

This time the shock was bad enough to make Lamees stagger and hiss in pain.

"Yes," Hux agreed, his voice cold, "maybe I should have. But then there would have been nothing left for him to hold over my head. And soon, I would have been dead, too. Now, he's under the impression he has power over someone I care about. When all he can do is threaten a toy which I'm willing to sacrifice in a heartbeat." To emphasize his words, Hux delivered another shock, this one causing Lamees to sink to the floor with a whimper. "And don't you dare whine about this to me. It was _your_ head Ren picked this out of—this delusion that I care about what happens to you—not mine."

Hux stepped up to her cowering from, and the girl shrank away from him, hiding her head in her hands. Only, Hux wasn't sure if it was the shocks or his words that had hurt her more. And he really didn't care.

"You know, my father was notorious for his dalliances during his time here and never quite managed to rid himself of the reputation, ever again," Hux said, and just as he'd expected, she took the bait.

"Is that what I am to you, then?" she asked, unshed tears shining in her eyes. "A 'dalliance'?"

"No." He put as much acid into his words as he could muster. "You're so much less. But simple minds will come to simple conclusions."

He wasn't even sure she understood what he was talking about. What would a wretched thing like her know about the risk keeping her around posed to his reputation? The rumors which might spread? His darkest fears suddenly bared their teeth as he imagined officers throughout the fleet bad-mouthing him over keeping a bed-slave, and a non-human one at that. Even the mockery his father had had to endure, over siring a bastard as his only child, would pale in comparison.

And what would _she_ think of it, the woman Hux had once loved? Surely, her father would waste no time in letting her know, in the worst possible light, of how he had disgraced himself for a non-human slut.

Lost in thought, Hux failed to notice as the girl pulled her legs under her, tensing like a coil. When she sprang at him, it was only years of physical training that saved him from being thrown off his feet, honed reflexes allowing him to grab her wrists instead. Her attack was clumsy, and Hux wasn't sure if she'd been trying to reach for his throat or to scratch at his eyes, but, twisting, he used her own momentum against her. Her angry shriek turned into a gasp as her back hit the floor and air was pressed from her lungs. Then Hux's weight came to rest on top of her, pinning her to the ground. But she was far from done.

Writhing and thrashing with the force of her desperate anger, Lamees struggled so fiercely that Hux didn't even manage to pin her wrists in place; too busy was he avoiding her legs as she was trying to knee him in the stomach, or perhaps the groin. And with the collar's remote knocked from his hand, he had little choice but to press his face into her neck to escape her scratching nails, while flattening his body against hers and so weather her fit of rage.

It took quite a while for the girl's fury to blow itself out, considering how much strength she put into her blows and squirming, and while he waited for her to calm, Hux suddenly realized that, contrary to yesterday and despite their close proximity, he did not feel the sinister effect of her pheromones. Perhaps it was because she was enraged, rather than scared or hurt.

Even the impatience and resentment he had felt for Lamees a moment ago had disappeared, washed away by the surprise of her attack and the desperation behind it. Instead, there was annoyance at her childishness, and a nagging sense of guilt, which Hux gave his best to deny, but which grew in insistency as Lala's fighting grew weaker, and her shrieks of rage dissolved into wrenching sobs. Once her struggles had seized completely and Hux judged it safe to pull back, the girl surprised him again as her hands fisted into his uniform, and she clung to him like a frightened child.

Sighing softly, Hux tried to push himself up enough to look at her face, but Lamees pulled him back with a whimper as if she were afraid to let him go. Not sure how to proceed, Hux shifted to at least free her of his weight. And Lala went with him, until they were lying on their sides, her small, strong hands wrinkling his uniform and her face hidden against his shoulder, his hands awkwardly stroking her back, hoping to quiet her shaking.

Perhaps he owed her this closeness, Hux thought, but it made him feel desperately uncomfortable, and, when it finally became too much for him to bear, he began to disentangle himself, gently but firmly. To his relief, Lamees now let him go without complaint.

By the time he had found his feet, the girl had sat up, hugging her knees to her chest and staring blankly at nothing. For a moment, Hux offered her his hand to help her up, but Lala seemed so lost in her own misery that he doubted she even noticed. Deciding to give her some space instead, he stepped away, and as his gaze fell on the small, silver square of the remote, he bent to pick it up. There was a sharp intake of breath, proving that Lamees had not been as lost to herself as Hux had thought, and when he looked over to her, he found her staring at him with wide, frightened eyes. Of course.

Perhaps he should punish her: for a slave to attack a master probably meant death in most cases, and even an indentured servant could face harsh punishment for such a thing. Hux could not imagine Gorat going easy on her if she had ever dared to attack him the way she had just done Hux. Then again, Gorat had been willing to trade Lamees off for a chance to revive his failing trade, while Hux had just accepted a humiliating post to save her from Ren. But Lamees didn't know about that.

Neither of them spoke during the few seconds Hux gazed at the remote in his hand, considering his options, before he let it slip into his pocket, unused. Then he went back into the refresher to fix his disheveled hair and change into a decent, unwrinkled jacket.

By the time he reemerged, Lamees had retreated into the sitting area, curled up in one of the armchairs, and looking miserable. Awkwardly, Hux approached her, making sure to keep a good distance between them, before he spoke.

"Get some more rest, if you want," he said, "then go clean up and get dressed. I'll likely be away all day, but I'll make sure you get fed." He had tried to keep his voice even, too weary to be angry.

Then he left, the collar's remote once more securely tugged away in the pocket of his jacket.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will be out Friday, as usual. Enjoy your week! ❤︎


	34. Care

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lala is left alone to contemplate the stupid, stupid thing she did and the dire consequences she might face. But instead of punishing her, Hux makes an effort to win back her trust.

After Hux had left, I sat there for a while, trying not to think about anything. My back was tight, maybe from sleeping on the ground, maybe from hitting the hard floor with force, twice in half a day. But I didn't feel like getting up to stretch. My throat, too, felt sore whenever I swallowed, and the collar lay painfully against an irritated patch of skin, which I suspected was a small electric burn. But the worst was my finger, throbbing so painfully that, eventually, I couldn't ignore it any longer and took off the constricting brace to check on it.

It didn't even look that bad, just red and a little swollen with the first, bright purple outlines of a bruise forming along the joint. But it felt so uncomfortable that I got up to run some cold water over it. While in the 'fresher, my eyes fell on the pool-like bathtub, but, once again, I didn't dare to use it. Instead, I allowed myself a luxuriously long shower, almost ten minutes, the hot water soothing my stiff muscles, and I stretched before padding back into the bedroom to get dressed.

When I returned into the living area, I found a meal had already been laid out for me. A very welcome surprise, since I hadn't eaten in quite a while and felt nauseated with hunger. Only after I had devoured the food, the sting in my throat disappearing after the first few bites, and curled up in an armchair, looking out into the dripping rainforest, did I finally allow myself to think.

There had been a viciousness in Hux today like I had never felt before, at least not aimed at me. And it had perhaps been that emotion bleeding from his mind into mine, which had caused me to act so utterly reckless. The way the General had looked down at me had made me doubt he even still saw me as a sentient, feeling being. It hadn't been the shocks. It hadn't even been the vile words. Purely the condescension in his emotions had driven me to do something so desperate and stupid as attacking him.

And it could have cost me my life.

I had been beaten, starved, raped, and locked away for days without company a few times in my life, each punishment worse for me than the last. And always dealt out for offenses much less severe than lifting a hand against my owner. What would Taka have done had I ever attacked him the way I had Hux? I didn't think he would have killed me—too much work had gone into my design and my training. But maybe someone else? Maybe Ada? Of all the painful things Taka had ever subjected me to, none had been as horrible as the time I accidentally burned myself in the kitchen as a child, and Taka had hurt Ada for it. And when he had threatened her, the day he sent me away with the First Order, I had known the moment he said the words that his was not an empty threat.

Hux, on the other hand, had once ordered his soldiers to execute me over something…something smaller, I couldn't even clearly remember what it had been. Talking back, maybe? Being somewhere where I wasn't supposed to be? It seemed a lifetime ago. He hadn't gone through with it in the end, but that didn't mean I believed his threat had been any less real than Taka's threat to kill Ada. The General had simply thought of another, more long-term form of punishment for me, that was all.

Would he do the same thing again? Give me a reprieve now, only to administer some other, harsher form of punishment later?

Somehow, I didn't think so. And not because I didn't think Hux vindictive. I remembered him telling me bits and pieces about his life, about how much he had hated his father, and the joy and satisfaction he'd felt when he mentioned the man's death, hinting that he had been involved in causing it.

What made me think he would forgo punishing me were the emotions I had sensed in him when I had attacked him, when he had held me, and then when he had left. Not once, since the moment I had flown at him, had he felt a desire to hurt me. Instead, he had stayed with me, lying on the cold floor, while I cried, despite the awkwardness it had awoken in him.

And yesterday?

Yesterday had marked the first time in my life, a man had resisted the grip of my pheromones and held himself back instead of just raping me. Contrary to what most people thought, Taka had seldom really hurt me during sex, but he hadn't always been gentle either. In a situation like last night, he would have fucked me, hard and ruthlessly, and seen it as his right as my owner. And I would have lain there, not begging or fighting, just waiting for it to be over. Then I would have moved on, ignoring the shame and the soreness, knowing they would both fade in a few days. They always did.

I was pulled out of my dark thoughts by another surprise as the door hissed open and a young officer in a light uniform entered. He explained that he was a medical officer sent by the General to have a look at my finger and any other discomforts I might feel. And even though his uniform looked nothing like the one worn by the medics I had met on the _Finalizer_ , I could sense he was sincere.

Doing my best to get over my surprise at his unexpected appearance and to shake off my somber thoughts, I gave him a thankful smile as I greeted him. We sat down at the table, where he unpacked the white bag he'd brought and took a look at my finger. He even apologized for taking so long to get to me, mentioning that the academy's interim command had met with a sudden accident. Luckily, I was best at keeping my face blank when I was tired, so I just expressed my condolences and assured him that I was grateful he was here now.

The medic's movements were sure but gentle and his demeanor calm, and I soon relaxed, despite the bit of pain he caused as he moved my finger joint to test its flexibility. He chided me mildly for taking off the brace too early, then fitted me with a curious, slightly bulkier brace that I only realized was a bacta container as warmth began to spread through my finger.

Next, he took a close look at my cheeck, softly shaking his head. He explained that the bleeding had long since stopped, and bacta wouldn't help with bruising so old. So, he instead applied some sort of gel, saying it would hasten the process of breaking down the spilled blood and make the discoloring fade more quickly. Then he did the same to the bruise Sindian's teeth had left on my shoulder.

When all that was done, and the medic asked me if there was anything else, I, for a moment, agonized over whether or not to tell him about the burn on my neck…somehow, the collar and everything to do with it still filled me with shame. But he'd been so kind and gentle that, in the end, I got over myself and lifted the slim, black ring out of the way to show him the irritated patch of skin underneath. Just like with all my other injuries, the medic examined the spot without comment, concentrating purely on his work, and soon a small amount of bacta had been sprayed on the irritation, instantly soothing its sting.

He asked me again if there was anything else he might have a look at, but I smiled and shook my head, thanking him sincerely for everything he'd done. As he left, the medic instructed me not to wash off the bacta and gel for at least an hour and not remove the brace for at least four. I mused about how much warmer he'd been than the medical officer from the _Finalizer_ before I remembered that Arkanis had joined the First Order only recently and that he had probably worked here long before that had happened.

———

Two more meals arrived as the day went by, all delivered by human servers instead of droids or coming out of a dispenser, and I began to wonder if Hux had arranged it that way or if it was due to the fact that we were on a planet, in a well-run facility, instead of a warship. I even managed to make a little small talk with the two men, different ones each meal. But, while always being polite, neither one lingered for longer than it took him to lay out the food and then, half an hour later, clear the empty plates away.

When night came, and the lights went on outside, bathing the dripping trees in a soft glow, another server arrived, and this time, it was a woman. I had just fumbled the bacta brace off my finger as she entered, pushing a tray cart in front of her, and gave her a curious look. She looked about Taka's age and was dressed in a similar uniform as the males had been. Only, instead of loose slacks, she was wearing a pencil skirt, her hair tied back in a neat bun. And she was the first female I had seen in weeks, not counting the women on Batuu, whose faces had all melted into the crowd.

Just as the men had done, she gave me a polite smile but no greeting as she began to set the table. And my attention was swiftly pulled away from her gender when I realized that she was laying out two place settings instead of one.

"Excuse me?" I said, pushing up from the couch I'd been sitting on. "Do you know if General Hux will be joining me?" Perhaps it was a stupid question, but I was too surprised—and suddenly too nervous—to think straight.

The woman gave me a warm smile and said, "Yes, dear, I think so," and her motherly tone made me feel strangely warm inside.

"Oh," I said sheepishly, and, as she went back to her task of setting the table, I looked down at the wrinkled shift I was wearing and remembered that I had never actually washed the healing gel and the bacta off my face and neck. Whispering a short apology, I hastily retreated into the refresher.

Once I had scrubbed off its sticky residue, I saw that the gel had done its job rather well: only a faint shadow of yellow remained on my cheek and nothing on my neck. I fished out some of the make-up Hux had provided me for my night with Sindian, and as I dabbed a bit of cover-up over the spot, the discoloration disappeared completely. After brushing my hair and cleaning my teeth, I hurried into the bedroom, where I picked out a nicer dress to wear. Only then did I reemerge into the living area.

It looked like the server had just finished setting the table. There were no bells and whistles, no candles or the like, of course, just two settings, the plates covered by heatshields, and a bottle resting a cooler. The cart was pushed neatly to the side, and I was just getting ready to try and pull the woman into some small talk before she left as the door hissed open, and General Hux came into the room.

The server adopted a stiff pose, but her face was open and friendly as she nodded to Hux. Nevertheless, for a moment, the General stopped short and, although there was hardly any reaction on his face, I could tell that something had thrown him. And with a jolt, I remembered that he had once told me that his mother had worked here, on Arkanis, in this very academy, in the kitchens. I could feel myself blush as I made the connection, but luckily no one was paying me any mind. Instead, after her short, wordless greeting, the server simply went on her way, Hux stepping aside smartly to let her pass. And, once she was gone, he seemed like himself again, all reserved control and formal pose.

But I still felt nervous as he simply said, "Come," and motioned to me to sit down at the table.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, guys. I cut this chapter in half to make sure I'd have something to post on Monday. But now I need your help: Please tell me if, in future, you'd prefer shorter chapters (maybe with cliff hangers) and updates on Friday and Monday, or longer chapters once a week. I just fear that, once the semester starts and I'll try to juggle helping out with two kids, a full-time job, and uni all simultaneously, I won't manage to feed you 3.000+ words chapters twice a week. 0_0  
> Or I might, but the writing will be utter crap. ^_^' Like, even worse than usual.
> 
> So, please let me know what you'd prefer in the comments.


	35. Tea (E)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux continues his efforts to win back Lala's trust. But is he being nice, or just his calculating self?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm posting this early because I have a full day on Monday and an early bedtime tonight. ^_^' Plus, it really is just the second half of the previous chapter anyway.

Once seated, Hux pulled off his gloves before deactivating his heatshield. While I followed his example, I thought about how much I'd preferred it if he had taken the time to change out of his uniform. He always felt so much more like 'my' Hux when he was dressed in the simple, black thermowear I was familiar with. Come to think of it, in all my positive memories of him—at least the ones from outside the bedroom—he'd worn casual clothes, while every time something horrible had happened between us, he'd been dressed the way he was now. And that didn't exactly help with the nervousness I just couldn't seem to shake. But at least the remote to my collar wasn't openly attached to his jacket, which I guessed was something.

"Since your face and finger both seem better, I take it the medic I sent did his job?" Hux asked as he pulled the peculiar-looking bottle from its cooler and filled his glass.

"Yes, thank you for that," I said, eyeing the teal-colored liquid he had poured. I had never seen its like as far as I could remember.

"It's Toniray Wine." Hux had apparently noticed my curiosity and, instead of putting the bottle back in its cooler, asked, "Did the medic give you anything? For the pain, maybe?"

I shook my head, thinking he was asking out of mere interest, then looked at him in wide-eyed surprise as he leaned over the table to fill my glass with wine as well.

"Toniray was produced on Alderaan," he explained, "a planet destroyed shortly before the Empire fell. It's highly sought after today, but my father squirreled away a few bottles. This one was the last one left." He lifted his glass to study. As the smooth, light-blue colored liquid inside caught the light and seemed to glow on its own, a slight smile played around his lips. "This wine is older than I am," he continued. "And it can have a strong effect, so don't drink it all down at once." There was amusement coloring his voice, and I, not for the first time, thought that he might be underestimating how quickly Zeltrons could break down intoxicants like alcohol.

But I could feel that he enjoyed making a bit of a show of things, which wasn't something I had seen much in Hux, and finally, I managed to relax a little. Carefully, I took a small sip from the wine. It was fruity, slightly sweet, and left a pleasant tingle on my tongue. Yeah, I could see how this might be something in high demand, even before its source had dried up, driving up its price.

"It's very nice," I said, but Hux only nodded without looking up, busy with his food, and I wondered if I had fooled myself a moment ago, seeing what I had wanted to see instead of what was there. He really was fucking hard to read sometimes, and while I started to eat, I wondered if that had something to do with working for someone like Ren.

Then, thinking back to last night, I realized I should really thank the stars for Hux's level of control…and wondered if there was something I could say to let him know how grateful I was. _Thanks for not raping me yesterday_ , although expressing exactly how I felt, somehow didn't seem appropriate. But, since I couldn't find a better wording, and no safe topic for small talk occurred to me, I kept mum.

We sat there eating in silence for quite a while, and it didn't feel like our usual, peaceful silence, either. Maybe that was just me, though, still feeling rattled after everything that had happened during the last two days, because Hux seemed his normal, calm self. I made an effort to try and enjoy the food and the wine and not think too much. Just when I had started to feel content again, Hux startled me when he spoke.

"You're very quiet tonight," he remarked casually, and I tried to smile as I met his level gaze.

"I…I'm not sure what to talk about, to be honest."

Hux nodded, took a sip of wine, and turned his attention back to his food. "Better not to talk at all then," he said, and I felt stung. It wasn't like he ever made much of an effort to start a conversation...why did he expect me to? Or, did he really mean it the way he said it and preferred for me to stay silent? It bothered me so much that I lost interest in my only half-eaten plate, and then, out of spite, I picked up my glass and drained the remaining wine in a single swig. It was a shame for such a treat to be thrown back like that, but it was the easiest, most convenient way of rebelling that I could think of. Only, when I chanced a glance at Hux, he seemed not to have noticed.

"So," I started, thinking of a topic I had been wondering about but hadn't mentioned earlier because I hadn't wanted to spoil the mood. "Now that Ren has found out about everything, what will happen to us?"

"Nothing you need worry about," he said, his expression and his tone telling me that the topic was just as unwelcome as I had judged. I wasn't happy to be left in the dark like this, but just when I was ready to dare and ask for more details, Hux gave me such a stern look, I thought better of it. And with that, we lapsed back into silence.

My appetite had disappeared, replaced with a knot in my stomach, and I spent the next few minutes pushing my food around, forcing down a few more bites, and waiting for Hux to finish. When he did, I put down my knife and fork as well, and I saw him glance at my plate then at my face. But he didn't say anything, nor could I read a particular reaction in him, as if his mind was already somewhere else.

Hux rose and, just as I got ready to follow suit, motioned for me to remain seated.

"No, stay," he said firmly, and feeling slightly apprehensive, I did, while he moved about, picking up our plates and putting them away in the cart. It was probably meant as a nice gesture, to let me stay in my seat, but it was so out of character for Hux that I felt incredibly awkward as he cleaned up around me.

When everything was cleared away, Hux put down a small cup in front of me, about the size the wineglasses had been, and sat back down in his chair, looking at me expectantly. The cup was warm to the touch, held what I guess to be some kind of tea, and smelled faintly sour. Carefully, since it was somehow still quite hot, I tried a sip and, although there was a slight bitterness, I was surprised by its pleasant, earthy notes and the citrusy aftertaste.

Hux, meanwhile, was still studying me so intently I found it a little hard to focus. Was he drugging me again?

"Do you like it?" he asked, and I was absurdly grateful that he had broken his silence.

"Yes, it's nice," I said honestly. "What is it?"

"Gatalantan Tea."

That took a second to sink in. Tea from my mother's home planet. The tea she had sometimes told me about when I was a child and pestered her for stories about knights and magic and things from her home. I swallowed thickly, suddenly overcome by confusing emotions.

And before I could put my thoughts in order enough to even just say 'thank you', Hux had gotten up. But instead of approaching me, he was heading toward the bedroom. I sat up and got ready to follow him because—as much I would have like to finish the tea—I thought that was what he expected of me: to show gratitude.

Instead, he stopped me with a gesture. "No, stay. You may take your time and come to me when you're ready."

I nodded, although I could hear the door swish only a few seconds after and realized, he hadn't waited for a reaction from me, giving me my space instead.

———

He was still awake when I came into the bedroom, nearly an hour later, sitting up against the headboard and reading from a datapad. His chest was bare and pale in the soft light of the bedside lamp. I padded up to the food of the bed but stopped there and leaned on the bedpost. I had had a bit of an emotional moment thinking about my mother once Hux had gone, and it had left me feeling drained. But also relaxed and, as Hux put the datapad on the bystander to focus on me, I wondered if he could see that I had been crying.

The dim light of the room made his pupils look strangely dark, and there were shadows under his eyes, making me realized I hadn't seen him look this drawn since before the time we had started sleeping together. One part of me longed to go to Hux and be close again…the other hadn't forgotten his viciousness from the other day and his cold words from earlier. Which was why I could feel my heart flutter in my chest as he beckoned for me to approach.

"Come." His voice was low, but sure—no room for arguing.

Feeling strangely shy, I stepped up to him and, as he pushed the covers further down to let me in, gathered up the hem of my dress, took off my underwear and slippers, and climbed onto the bed to straddle his lap. I could feel that he was studying my face, but I couldn't quite bring myself to meet his eyes. I also felt, more than saw, that he was naked.

"Did you like the tea?" Hux said in a conversational tone as he bunched up my dress, pushed it up, off my body, and let it drop to the floor.

"Yes. Thank you…" I whispered.

"Good." He took hold of my hand and guided it down between us. "Show me."

Felling a little surer of myself, I gripped his cock and started stroking the shaft with the familiar up and down motion, quickly feeling it swell under my fingers. As my body easily responded to his arousal, and his hand brushed over my breast, his nail carefully scraping over my nipple, I felt heat pooling between my legs. Finally feeling brave enough, I looked up and saw that he was focused on my face, his gaze traveling up from my lips to meet my eyes. Just as I palmed his head and felt a smudge of precum under my hand, Hux exhaled and took hold of my waist.

"Enough," he said, and I supported myself on his shoulders as he urged my hips up with one hand and guided his cock inside me with the other. I sunk down on him easily, holding his gaze all the way.

"Good. Slowly, now." His words were but a whisper against my mouth as I leaned in and brushed my tongue against his lips. I felt him inhale and began to move, rocking my hips slowly, fluidly, trying to please. This leisurely pace was almost tender, compared to our usual sex, and curiously comforting.

Hux's hands firmly brushed up my back, drawing me closer, and there was a sharp twinge inside me from how deeply our position allowed him in. But I didn't mind, focusing instead on the sensations of his hands stroking me, his scent in my nose, and his taste on my tongue as I buried my face in the crook of his neck and pressed open-mouthed kisses against his skin.

There wasn't much friction for me to enjoy, but this wasn't about me. And Hux certainly seemed pleased by my slow rocking because soon his breath in my hair sped up, and his hands on my body became more insistent in guiding me, making me pick up the pace. Bathing in his lust, I tensed and bore down on him, extracting a satisfying groan, then felt the waves of his climax. I rocked against him a few more times, letting him ride out his pleasure before I stilled.

While he caught his breath, I idly brushed my fingers over his shoulder, absentmindedly tracing a thin, white scar and waiting to see if he'd tell me to move off of him. I was content where I was, actually, but it was late, and I could feel a deep weariness in him. Instead, Hux pulled me closer, his hands stroking up my back, and buried his face in the nape of my neck.

"Are you alright?" he asked into my hair, and, musing that he had never, ever, asked me that before, I nodded and smiled against his shoulder.

"Hmm, yeah. I'm alright."

He drew one last, deep breath before his hand in my hair gently pulled me back, so he could look at my face.

"This will have to stay on for a while," he said, stroking a thumb along the metal ring around my neck, and I tried not to let my disappointment show too much. "It will protect you, at least a little. And I'll know where you are."

For a moment, I was confused, but his meaning became clearer as he continued, his voice grave.

"We will leave Arkanis on a troop transport tomorrow and meet up with the _Steadfast_. Things there will be different. Dangerous. I won't be the commanding officer and…" he hesitated. I could tell there was more on his mind, but he pressed out a breath and started a new thought. "I will need you to stay out of sight and out of mind as much as possible. Do you hear me, Lamees?"

I nodded, a little scared and a little puzzled. It wasn't like I had been prancing about on the _Finalizer_ or even here, on Arkanis, after all. And what had happened to me being a toy, he was willing to sacrifice? I almost smiled at the thought that he seemed to care after all…but he might misinterpret that as me not taking his words seriously, and that idea was rather sobering.

So, I simply said, "I promise."

"Good. Now, move over. It's late, and even I need to sleep sometime."

I smiled, but before I let him guide me off him, I leaned in one more time, took his face in my hands, and kissed him. There was a sigh he tried to pass off as exasperation—but I could tell was something more tender—before his mouth opened for me, and he allowed my tongue a moment to explore. I could have sworn his cock inside me gave a twitch, too. But Hux stayed adamant and pulled away.

"Alright, enough," he said firmly, and I relented, letting his cock slide out of me as I slid further into the sheets and repositioned myself at his side. After shutting off the bedside lamp, Hux followed me deeper under the covers and stretched out against my back, brushing my hair out of the way so he could nestle his nose into the nape of my neck, breathing deeply.

I was half asleep when something in my thoughts suddenly clicked into place.

"That's what Ren wanted from you, wasn't it?" I whispered into the darkness. "You, giving up the _Finalizer_ for good and transferring to another ship? That's why he…why he threatened to kill me. And why he didn't." I had to swallow against a tightness in my throat, the terror of not being able to breathe and not being given a chance to fight—or beg—still raw on my mind.

His hand, which had found mine, tightened on our interlaced fingers almost painfully, and I warily wondered if I had gone too far. Then Hux sighed, and his grip relaxed somewhat.

"For once, do as you're told and go to sleep, Lala."

And I did, although it took me a while. And Hux, too, I thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I almost called this 'Tea? Yes, please, and thank you'  
> But a) that would have been super long and b) just too silly, especially for this chapter.
> 
> The songs I was listening to while I wrote the second half of this (several weeks ago) were [_9 Crimes_ and ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EDn7-xC2A8E&list=PLPaztBWnatch_6JOc14JZGNKMFD5G5pH6&index=1)[_9 Crimes (Demo)_](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4655F-U2tbw&list=PLPaztBWnatch_6JOc14JZGNKMFD5G5pH6&index=12) by Damien Rice. If you know these songs, it'll give you more of an idea of the melancholy mood I was in and the truly tender, fluid, and slow sex I imagined happening here between Lala and Hux.
> 
> Also: I was horrified over the weekend when I reread some older chapters and realized that Lala is wearing pants and a shift on Batuu, and then, right after when they arrive on Arkanis, she's wearing a dress. <_< That happened because I took out a scene in between, and because I had written the Arkanis stuff so much earlier than the Batuu plot. After laughing at myself for half an hour, I went back and fixed it. xD


	36. Choice (E)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While Lala and Hux make the best out of their last morning together on Arkanis, Hux offers Lala a critical choice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry for the long wait, guys. I have no real excuse except for writer's block and stress with University ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

I woke up to a hand firmly stroking up my back.

Hux did that sometimes during the night when he wanted to have sex. And the combination of his by now familiar presence paired with the tranquility of a dark room was such a pleasant one that many of my fondest memories with him started that way. He just _felt_ different when he was relaxed from sleep: slightly mischievous and uncharacteristically tender, almost playful, gently pulling me into reality by teasing my nipples or burying his hand between my legs, strong fingers often sneaking inside me before I was fully awake.

He wasn't quite as much in a hurry now, though. My sleep-addled mind hardly registered his whispers of "You're alright," focusing instead on his hands, which continued to stroke my body as I stretched and sighed. And another emotion awoke, kindled by the warmth his touch spread over my skin and multiplied by the fact that I hadn't had an orgasm in over two days now. It wasn't like I had minded making our earlier sex all about him. He'd done something nice for me, and I'd shown him that I was thankful in return. But my body was also wired a certain way…

And so I eagerly turned from my stomach onto my side, pressing my back against Hux's heated body, hoping his hand would soon find its way between my legs and into my core. Instead, he carefully repositioned us so that my head was resting on his biceps, guiding my arms so he could trap one under the other and keep them both pinned against my chest by holding just one wrist.

This wasn't new…Hux greatly enjoyed trapping me in ways that left me unable to move while he played with my body. And I never objected. There was something incredibly erotic about giving in, about brushing all rational thought aside and just feeling held by his strength, unable to escape. In the beginning, this dominant side of Hux had been scary. But I had quickly understood that there was no desire to hurt me behind it. He simply felt most at ease when he was in control, and I had no problem with letting him have it.

At least as long as I got a few good orgasms out of it.

To archive just that, I squirmed, pressing my ass against him and moaning in encouragement as he drew my leg over his before his hand finally traveled down where I wanted it. I could tell he was planning on taking his time—again, not a surprise—as his fingers brushed along my outer lips so gently it tickled, causing me to squirm a little more, chasing his hand.

"So eager," Hux breathed into my hair and then made that snorting sound of amusement I so adored when I softly moaned, "Always," in response.

If only that had caused him to abandon his teasing and move things along. Instead, Hux continued with his torturously soft touches, brushing up and down along my entrance until my pussy began to tighten and release in involuntary spasms, and I could feel sweat forming all over my body. I was about ready to start begging when his fingers finally dipped a little deeper, just an inch or so into my heat. I tried to arch my back with a desperate noise. His grip on me was too strong, though, so all I could do to encourage a firmer touch was move my hips. An effort Hux quickly put an end to by pulling back his hand and taking hold of my leg.

"Hold still, Lala," he warned, "or I'll stop."

I mewled in distress.

"No, please…" I whined and felt it fill him with smug satisfaction.

Before his hand returned to its work, Hux took the opportunity to throw back the covers. Cold air hit me everywhere. But especially at that very wet spot between my legs, which was exposed even more as Hux pulled my leg further back. Through a fog of lust, I remembered how he had said that sleeping next to me felt like sleeping next to an overheating generator to him and smiled. Then his fingers dipped into my pussy and, after gathering the slick there, finally, _finally_ , reached my clit, driving all coherent thought from my brain.

Slowly increasing in speed and pressure, his teasing of that sensitive nub of nerves soon had me feeling flushed and hot again, as I strained against his grip in the throws of my pleasure, dimly aware of how my struggling turned him on.

"Fuck," I pressed out when a particularly delicious shudder ran through me.

In retaliation, Hux's hand left my clit and, none too gently, pinched me on the inside of my thigh. I jerked, more in surprise than pain, then moaned, feeling Hux's amusement in my mind and his smile against my skin.

"Don't cuss, Lala," he scolded, sounding perfectly calm and in control, while his fingers, now back where they belonged, continued to turn me into an incoherent, sweaty mess.

"Please, Hux…please," I begged, and his grip tightened, the pressure on my clit increasing.

"Please, what?" he asked, still sounding infuriatingly calm.

"Please, fuck me," I moaned back, knowing no shame when it came to expressing what I wanted.

Instead of obliging, Hux chuckled slightly before his fingers sunk into me, deeply now, and the heel of his hand pressed down on my clit.

"Maybe later," he mused while I squirmed, whimpered, and moaned. "Come for me first."

And I did.

With his usual relentlessness, Hux drove me over the edge and beyond, the heel of his hand rubbing against my clit so hard that it was almost painful. Thankfully, this time, as my orgasm ebbed, he eased up immediately.

The grip on my wrist loosened a little while I caught my breath, but despite his erection pressing against the small of my back, Hux did not move. For now, he seemed content to hold me against him and breathe into my hair, waiting for my heartbeat to return to normal. After a bit, I sighed and stretched, and when I tried to turn around to face him, Hux let go of me.

Only, he also got out of bed, and at first, I was too surprised to react. Then I looked outside, saw the first dim signs of dawn filtering through the trees, and realized that it must be very early morning.

I moaned softly and buried my face in Hux's pillow—I had never been an early riser, and the last few nights hadn't exactly been restful. Plus, the pillow smelled enticingly of Hux. I hoped I might be able to catch a few more minutes of sleep, but the General seemed to have other ideas.

"Lala," he said to get my attention from where he stood at the bathroom door. "Come, join me."

 _Huh._ Well, his cock was still standing at attention, so maybe I shouldn't have been surprised. Sighing, I rolled out of bed and followed him.

Hux moved confidently through the room, and I padded after him, shivering in the cold. Glancing at the huge tub, I hoped he would fill it up again for the both of us, but he moved straight past. And since things between us still didn't feel quite right, despite what had just happened, I didn't feel comfortable asking if I was allowed to use it by myself.

As Hux stepped into the shower, I stood there, not exactly sure what he expected me to do. But it was nice to watch him, with the water running down his body, and the steam that rose all around him spoke of warmth, so I slowly edged closer. After a moment, Hux brushed the wet hair out of his eyes, and when he saw me standing close, reached out to take my hand and gently pull me toward him. I went gladly, smiling up at him, then sighed as the hot spray hit me.

Closing my eyes, I felt his hands join the stream running over my body before he brushed back my hair and kissed me. I had to fight the urge to giggle at the strange sensation of water hitting my skin and Hux kissing me at the same time as I reached out to draw him closer. And, as I had expected, he didn't waste any time before pressing me back against the wall and lifting my leg. I held onto his shoulders for balance, slightly nervous about our difference in height as he positioned his cock at my entrance. But Hux was careful as he moved forward, pushing into me slowly, and the last thing I saw before my eyes dropped shut with pleasure was his intense expression as he studied my face.

My body was still humming from my recent orgasm and combined with Hux's lust pressing into my mind, I soon shuddered and moaned again as he picked up his pace. I was forced up on tiptoe but pressed against the wall as tightly as I was, my leg securely held in Hux's elbow, there was no danger of me losing my balance. Not even as his orgasm washed through me, taking me over the edge as well.

And then, after, Hux remained surprisingly thoughtful, gently letting my leg down and kissing me deeply before telling me to turn around and reaching for the gel-like soap to wash my hair. Somehow this mundane act felt incredibly intimate, and, after a brief moment of nervousness, my eyes fluttered closed as strong fingers worked the soap into my hair and over my scalp. After Hux had guided me under the shower spray for a rinse, I turned around and reached up to do the same for him. And just as it had been for me, I could feel a moment of awkwardness in him before he pushed the feeling away.

We stayed under the hot shower for quite a while, washing, touching, and kissing each other, and eventually, I had to voice my surprise. "I didn't think the water would stay warm for this long," I admitted, but Hux just scoffed in amusement, not bothering to reward my naiveté with an answer.

After he had turned off the shower and reached for a towel, I gave the bathtub another wistful look, and this time, Hux noticed. Stepping up behind me, not unlike the first time I had wondered about the deep hole in the floor, he draped the towel over my shoulders before he asked, "Would you like me to fill it up again?"

"Yes!" I said and looked up at him with shining eyes. "I mean, only if it's not too much to ask…"

Lacing his hand into my hair, Hux guided my head back so he could kiss me, deeply, before he let go, bent down, and activated the controls. "It's not," he said, stepping into the square space and holding out his hand to me. "Come."

I let the towel glide of my shoulders, then took his offered hand and let him guide me down the steps. The taps had been opened for less than a minute, but the whisper-quiet streams running down from all four sides were so wide that the water already reached up to my ankles. By the time Hux had chosen a place for us to sit on the benches ringing the pool and pulled me down next to him, liquid warmth rose around us and tickled my back as it ran from a slit in the wall.

Closing my eyes, I leaned my head on Hux's shoulder, and his arm snuck around me and held me close. As I relaxed against him, I wondered if it was possible to fall asleep while being surrounded by water, and over the next twenty minutes or so, I slowly began to drift off.

"Lala, there's something I need to talk to you about." Hux's voice pulled me back from the edge of dreams. "And I think it's best we do it now. I'm facing an uncertain future, and... it might be better if you didn't stay with me."

I sat up, making small waves splash, and stared at him in wide-eyed horror, all traces of sleepiness driven from my mind.

"No, Hux, please—" but that was as far as I got before he shushed me with a gesture.

"Lamees, listen," he said firmly but patiently, "there's no reason for you to be scared. I have looked through the list of officers who have made offers for you and picked someone who I think will keep you safe and treat you well. His name is Domaric Quinn. He's a General of rank—like me—a strategist, a member of the Supreme Council. And, most importantly, he's a level headed man with a position which is much more secure than my own. He also has two children, a little younger than you, born of his late wife and away in our officer cadet program."

My heart felt like it was trying to hammer its way out of my chest, and that made it hard to think.

"How old is he?" I asked because of the children Hux had mentioned and because it was the first clear thought in my head.

"Does it matter?" Hux asked in turn. I took a moment to mull it over. I thought it did, but perhaps not in the way Hux seemed to expect: Taka had been fifty-five, and the age difference between us had never bothered me. But I had also never considered what would happen if he ever grew tired of having me around.

"What if this Quinn gets bored of me in a few years?" I asked, hoping Hux would understand what scared me. "Will he want to get rid of me? The way you do?" I barely got those last words past my lips, and they came out as a whisper. But of course Hux had heard, and when I dropped my gaze, he gently took hold of my chin to make me look back up at him.

"This is not about me wanting to get rid of you, Lala," he said gravely. "This is simply the best way I can think of to keep you safe."

I wanted to believe him, but…

"Yesterday, after what Ren did, you said—" I started, but he interjected.

"I lied."

I think my heart skipped a beat as Hux leaned in to brush his lips against mine, kissing me in that slow, tender way he sometimes had, and which always made me wish he would never stop. But of course, eventually, he did.

"And it is because of what Ren did that I want you to consider this," he said. "He doesn't hate Quinn the way he does me. You'd be safer."

"Would I be a slave again?"

Hux just nodded, not bothering to explain how that would happen. And I realized the how didn't matter.

Then I said nothing for quite a while, just tried to make sense of all this, while Hux waited patiently.

"You said you want _me_ to consider this," I asked cautiously, "does that mean you'll let me decide?"

Hux took a deep breath, as if he, too, thought trusting me with such a big decision wasn't a wise choice.

Then he nodded and said, "Yes, I'll leave it up to you. But I want you to think very carefully. If you choose to stay with me on the _Steadfast_ , I might not be able to protect you from Ren. He might hurt you again, just to get to me. And if I die, they will simply sell you off to the highest bidder, no matter who that will be."

"But…you said an indentured servant can't be sold off the way a slave can. That the new contract would protect me?"

"In theory, yes," Hux allowed. "But in reality? In this galaxy, the truly powerful can do what they want with the vulnerable, Lamees. The First Order is no exception. Selling you to Quinn will put you back into bondage, but I wouldn't suggest it if it wasn't the safest choice for you."

What Hux was saying seemed to make sense. I wasn't the kind of person who'd risk survival over the chance of maybe, one day, being free. Or, at least, I had never thought I was. So, why was I hesitating?

"What if I said I wanted to stay with you?"

"You would, once again, proof that your sense of self-preservation is utterly lacking," Hux said mockingly. But I had felt, the moment I had posed my question, a reaction in Hux that was very contrary to his derisive tone. Shifting, I straddled his lap, the water softly lapping around us, and he drew a deep breath as his hands took hold of my hips and pulled me closer. I could feel a new erection growing against me and almost smiled.

"Tell me you want me to stay, and I'll stay," I whispered, taking his face into my hands like I often did before kissing him.

He pressed out a breath, then said softly, "I've done a lot of selfish things in my life, Lala, but I don't think I can do this…"

"Sure, you can."

I reached down between us to grip his shaft, making him groan. Hux's grip on my hips grew tighter, but he didn't stop me as I lifted myself up, guided his cock into me, and sank down on him slowly. I knew what I was doing wasn't exactly fair. But I didn't want him to send me away, and I didn't want to have to ask him to keep me.

I wanted to hear that it was what he wanted, too.

"Just say you want me to stay with you."

When he still wouldn't, I leaned in to lick at his lips, teasing his mouth open, and as I pressed my tongue in, I could feel him begin to move up into me.

"Alright, yes," he all but growled, but it wasn't enough for me. So I stilled, tightening my thighs and resisting his hands as they urged me to keep moving.

"Yes, what?"

Temper flared in his eyes, and suddenly his hand gripped the back of my neck a little too hard. But I didn't make a sound, just stared down at him while my heart hammered in my chest, and after a few seconds had ticked by, his grip suddenly relaxed, and his eyes softened.

"Yes, I want you to stay with me," he admitted, making my racing heart miss a beat.

"Then I will," I whispered thickly before I started fucking him in earnest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have a wonderful Halloween, ya all! (It's my favorite holiday! ^_^)


	37. Interlude 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux and Lala arrive on the Steadfast to an unfriendly welcome. Humiliated and agitated, Hux struggles not to let his dark mood get out of hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cari, being American, is *not* in the right headspace to beta right now, so all mistakes and inconstancies in this chapter are entirely my own.

It was mid afternoon local time on Arkanis, and General Hux tensely watched two droids collect what uniforms of his and clothes for Lamees had accumulated in their closet over the past few days. The same would be done with his few personal belongings remaining on the _Finalizer_ , all to be transported to and stored in their new quarters on the _Steadfast_.

A door hissed, and Lamees stepped out of the 'fresher, her hair pulled back in a neat bun, just as Hux had instructed, and wearing a demure grey dress and a coat of thick, black wool, accented with a fur collar and cuffs. The coat suited the girl well, but the severe hairstyle was utterly unfamiliar on her, and Hux noticed how it brought out her high forehead, bright eyes, and full lips. Gorat truly had fashioned himself a living doll, making sure her facial features would be dominated by childlike characteristics while forming her body to be that of a woman: with shapely breasts, a narrow waist, and soft hips. 

"Ready?" he asked, and the girl nodded. "Good. Lala, wait…" Lamees had begun to move past him, but he held her back with a hand on her arm, nervously thinking of a few last-minute instructions. 

"Call me 'Sir' when we're not alone, " he said, his voice urgent, but low, as if he were worried they might be overheard. "Try not to look people in the eye, and don't speak unless absolutely unavoidable. If someone asks you a question, let me answer for you. Or wait until I tell you to say something. The more cowed and disheartened you appear, the safer you'll be. Understood?"

The girl nodded, then said, "Yes, I understand," and Hux felt a tiny smudge less anxious. 

"Good," he said again. "If we're lucky, we won't run into anyone important enough to dare approach us until I've brought you safely to our new quarters."

Smiling, Lala looked up at him and, with a familiarity that bordered on insolence, brushed her hands over the lapels of his greatcoat. "I'm sure we'll be all right," she said. And, as much as Hux had trouble admitting it, even to himself, her words helped to calm his nerves further.

———

Their luck only lasted until shortly after their arrival on the _Steadfast_. The departure from Arkanis on the assigned troop transport had gone smoothly, with everyone showing them the respect Hux was due. When a small detail of six stormtroopers leat by a sergeant greeted them as they disembarked in the ship's main hangar, the General had hope that his plan would work. Unfortunately, they didn't even make it to the turbo lift before they were intercepted by Allegiant General Pryde himself, who was accompanied by his chief of staff, Admiral Frantis Griss.

With no way to avoid the confrontation, Hux threw Lamees a warning look, meant to remind her of his instructions from earlier, and the girl gave a small but reassuring little nod, then lowered her gaze to the floor submissively. When the two groups met and came to a halt, she positioned herself somewhat behind Hux, perhaps trying to fade into the background, as Pryde threw her an arrogant, disproving look.

"Allegiant General," Hux greeted the older man stiffly, hoping against hope to get this over with quickly.

"Quarters are prepared for you," Pryde informed him, and his directness made Hux suspect that he shared his wish to get this done as soon as possible. "I expect you on the bride an hour before third shift tomorrow, General. There is catching up for you to do after your little _excursion_." At this, Pryde's gaze again came to rest on Lamees, as if he thought her the main reason Hux had defied orders and headed to Arkanis instead of following orders and overseeing the decommissioning of the _Finalizer_ before reporting for his transfer. Maybe he was under the delusion that Hux had taken Lala on some sort of joyride to avoid his duties.

"And this one," the Allegiant General asked, looking at Lamees but clearly speaking to Hux. "Is she at least healthy? No diseases? You never know with these non-humans, and the last thing I need is her spreading some backplanet plague through my ship."

Behind Hux, the girl shifted but remain quiet. From long years of acquaintance with Pryde, the General was well aware of the older man's support of Human High Culture ideas and had expected nothing less than complete disdain for the fact that Lamees was a Zeltron. And he refused to be rattled by the Allegiant General's open racism.

"She was thoroughly examined when she arrived on the _Finalizer_ , and no concerns were raised." It wasn't the complete truth. Back then, Hux had not spared a single thought for Lala or her well-being, locked away in her cabin, and so it hadn't been until circumstances forced to allow her into his own quarters that he had ordered tests to determine her health status. But Pryde didn't need to know that.

"I expect you to keep her locked up and out of the way regardless," the Allegiant General informed him. "No decent officer should be exposed to something like her." For a moment, it seemed that this was their dismissal. But the Pryde turned, and in a low, arrogant voice added, "Jocasta would be embarrassed. I always tried to warn her about you, but this…not even your father would have sunk so low." 

Hux's throat filled with bile, the effort of containing his fury too strenuous for him to come up with a proper reply. And it was at this instant that, in defiance of what he had told her, Hux saw Lamees raise her gaze, catching Pryde's. His was still full of disdain, but her's completely neutral, as the two silently stared at each other for several long seconds, neither willing to back down. And to Hux's vast surprise, it was Pryde who seemed to balk first, shifting uncomfortably, then snapping, "Get her out of my sight!" before turning on his heels and walking away. Both Admiral Griss and Lala's glare followed him down the corridor.

Part of Hux wanted to congratulate Lamees for successfully staring down an officer who routinely made soldiers with years of battle experience quake in their boots. But a more insistent part of him was angry that she had not only ignored his direct order, but put herself at even greater risk by doing so, and that part won out. 

"Move," he barked, just as the girl turned to him, perhaps looking for approval or reassurance, neither of which she would get from him. Her eyes now became wide and fearful, and she made a soft noise as Hux roughly took hold of her arm to drag her along. Their escort followed them until they reached the turbo lift, where Hux turned and dismissed them with a sharp command. Once the doors closed and they were alone, he let go of Lamees but refused to look at her, punishing her with disapproving silence instead. Clearly, this did have the desired effect because he could see, from the corner of his eyes, how the girl repeatedly threw him imploring looks before she gave up and lowered her head, meekly waiting out the end of their journey.

It wasn't even that he was truly angry at her. But why did she refuse to grasp the consequences such rash actions might have, for both of them? His hope had been that he'd be able to swiftly store her away, where she'd remain under Pryde's radar and that, in time, the Allegiant General would forget she even existed. Hux was prepared to swallow his pride and be a good toady, buying their safety with his dignity while he waited for the wheel to turn and new opportunities to arise. Only, Lamees' display of open defiance had now destroyed any chance of Pryde forgetting about her anytime soon. 

The thought of what that might mean weighed heavily on his mind as he led their way from the lift to their new quarters. And once he had unlocked the door and pushed Lamees inside, his breath caught for a second, and a new wave of fury made bile rise in his throat. These accommodations were not the apartment befitting an officer of his rank. Instead, they consisted of a single, relatively small room, housing a table with unmovable benches, a dispenser, and a door, which Hux expected led to a wet-cell unit barely passing as a refresher. The worst insult of it all, however, was the single, narrow bed situated against one wall, barely two feet wide and utterly insufficient for two people to sleep in. 

At his side, Lala made a noise which he at first thought was a gasp, then realized was a quickly suppressed snort of laughter. 

"I'm sorry," she said, softly clearing her throat. Hux could tell that she picked up on his agitation and tried her best to suppress her mirth, but there was still a hint of unbelieving laughter in her voice as she continued. "It's just, do they expect us to sleep in turns?" 

The General shot her a dark look, which made her shut her mouth and bite her lip. Then he went over to a control panel and, without bothering to explain what he was doing, ordered a mattress be brought in for Lamees to sleep on.

The girl in question had begun to slink up to him, wrapping her arms around his waist from behind and cooed, "Or we could simply sleep on top of each other…" 

"Stop!" He barked and, perhaps more roughly than was necessary, Hux pushed her hands off of him. 

Her shoulders slumped, and as Lamees moved away to sit on one of the benches, an expression of defeat in her eyes, Hux silently cursed himself for letting his temper get the better of him. His bad mood wasn't her fault. She had only tried to cheer him, in the best way, she knew how, and despite the fact that she was in just as much of a pickle as he was. Maybe more, since, at least in name, he was still a general, while Lala was believed by everyone around her to be a slave. 

Pulling off his gloves and coat, throwing both carelessly on the table between them, Hux pretended to busy himself with the console. Behind him, Lamees picked up his coat and shed her own before storing them both in the compartment closet lining one wall. Then she sat back down without a word. For a few minutes, Hux brooded, torn between his anger, for which Lamees offered a convenient but undeserving target, and the urge to comfort her, to let her know that she was the only ally he had left and that he hadn't meant to push her away, not truly. Just when the silence between them had stretched on so long that be felt it necessary to pick one option or the other, he was saved from having to make a choice when the door hissed open. A service droid entered, which caused Lamees to jump up from her seat, startled, and move over to him.

"It's here to deliver the mattress I commissioned for you," Hux explained softly. He had noticed how she made an effort to keep him between herself and the robot, how they were so close they were almost touching, and felt relieved that she still sought his proximity as reassurance.

"Oh," she said sheepishly. "I'm sorry. I just wasn't expecting…it."

Instead of answering her in words, Hux deliberately brushed his hand against hers, knowing the skin on skin contact would make it easier for Lala to sense that he wasn't annoyed with her. It worked, he saw, because, despite the loud hissing noise coming from the droid as it pressed out air, turning a vacuum-compressed little package into a narrow mattress, the girl visibly relaxed. And when he told her to go to the dispenser and pick something out for their dinner, she gave him a shy smile and did. 

By the time their food was delivered, and Lamees had placed the trays on the narrow table, the droid had finished its work of making up a modest place for Lala to sleep on the floor next to the actual bed and disappeared out the door. They ate in silence, Hux still agonizing over all the indignities Ren and Pryde had managed to inflict upon him already, and which he was certain would only worsen in the coming days. Lala, too, seemed too drained for smalltalk—or, just as likely, she sensed that Hux had little to no patience left and was wise enough to keep quiet. That was until their meal was done, and their trays cleared away, because then, stepping up to the bed, she held out her hand to him.

"It's not big enough for both of us, Lala," Hux pointed out the obvious, trying to keep his voice soft to take the sting out of his words.

"To sleep in, yes," she said, with a sly smile on her lips. And, right as he was about to tell her that he wasn't in the mood for sex, she went on, "I'll move to the mattress later, I promise. But for now, come and sit with me? Hold me?" 

She said it so sweetly, so innocently, that when Hux pressed out a breath, he could feel some of his anger being expelled with it. And more when he took a step toward Lamees, and her smile grew wider, happier. As he reached her, she put a hand on his chest, letting it glide over the fabric of his uniform, then looked up at him with questioning eyes.

"Erm, would you mind taking that off?" she asked, and Hux had to suppress a smile. He knew why she asked, of course, had long since noticed that his uniform had a disquieting effect on her for some reason. And, deep down, he even enjoyed knowing that there was still a part of her kept on her toes by such a simple, symbolic thing. Being dressed as an officer made him feel the most confident, so perhaps that was also what the girl reacted to. Whatever her reasons, Lamees had always found a way to get him out of uniform before they had sex. 

And one day, he meant to change that. But not tonight.

"No," he said, barely above a whisper. They were standing so close to each other now, Hux could feel her warmth, even through their clothes. "You do it."

When Lala looked up, the slightly mischievous glint in her eyes made him realize that, when it wasn't about sex, he enjoyed seeing her content, confident in her actions, and calm in his presence. And as sure hands made short work of his belt, which was dropped carelessly aside, before starting on the hooks of his uniform jacket, Hux leaned in and let her work, enjoying the closeness between them that had become more than physical. 

Once his jacket was neatly stored away and their shoes discarded, Hux sat on the bed, pushing back until he leaned against the headboard, then pulled Lamees to him. Smiling, she knelt between his legs, took his face into her hands, and kissed him. He half expected her to ignore her request from earlier to only be held, but the kiss was sweet, almost innocent, and soon Lala pulled back and settled into his arms, not unlike she had often snuggled against him during their quiet evenings back on the _Finalizer_.

Sighing, he buried his face in her hair and allowed his eyes to fall closed as he deeply inhaled her scent. Even the understanding of how her pheromones worked, the awareness of how it was all down to chemicals tricking his body to relax, didn't lessen the pleasantness of the effect her closeness had on his ragged nerves. Like bacta spread over a laser burn. 

It was also quite intriguing, and Hux wasn't sure Lamees was aware of this, but what influence her body chemistry had on him varied with her own mental state: when she was calm, the effect was soothing. When something made her happy, the effect was strangely uplifting. And when she was aroused, he, too, could feel lust grow in him with every breath he took. The research he had done about Zeltrons had made it clear that this was a mirror of how his emotions, in turn, influenced her. 

Naturally born members of her species were famous for their eagerness to surround themselves with happy, content people, and, considering their empathic ability, this was not surprising. Only, they were able to consciously use their pheromones to manipulate the emotional state of others to their liking. An ability Gorat had denied Lamees, turning her species' strength into a weakness—but also bestowing a certain innocence on her, since her pheromones always spoke the truth about her frame of mind.

How she could now be so calm that Hux felt the tension in him ease with every inhale, in defiance of everything that had happened today, was beyond him. But he was grateful. 

And he could tell that he wasn't the only one the day had taken a toll on because it didn't take long for her breathing to deepen and slow, the perfect steadiness of its rhythm announcing that Lala had fallen asleep in his arms. Hux smiled, despite himself, enjoying the warmth of her weight against his chest. Eventually, he would have to wake her so she could move to the mattress beside his bed. But not yet. 

Then a thought gave him pause.

What if she had one of her nightmares? They were a curious thing, these night terrors of hers. Sometimes they caused her to thrash about violently and cry out, "No! No!" As if in sleep, her mind was finally allowed to voice the objections she so rarely dared utter during her waking hours. But more often, the only sign of her terror was a whimper or a whine and, of course, the heavy effect of the pheromones her body produced. 

With a nagging sense of guilt, Hux thought of all the occasions he had woken with his cock rock hard and an unbearable urge to bury himself in her heat. Each time a considerable amount of self-control had been needed to rein in this mad lust and pull Lamees out of whatever horror was holding her consciousness captive first, to touch and whisper to her, instead of simply rolling her over and taking her. 

But it was rewarding, too, because once she was awake, and her body responded to his desire for her, the pheromones changed, and the urgency of his need became bearable. Then it was easy again to touch and tease her until she was wet and ready for him, pulling him close if he allowed her to, or writhe when he was holding her down, begging him with sweet words and the fluid motion of her hips to _please_ fuck her. And then he could finally oblige, without feeling like complete scum. 

Yet, the most astonishing thing about these episodes was that, as soon as she was awake, Lamees seemed completely oblivious to how they had started. More than once, Hux had asked her, after their lust had been satisfied, what she had been dreaming about. The first time she had grinned and said, in that beautifully unapologetic way she had, that his fingers on her clit had been too distracting for her to remember anything from before. Back then, Hux had suspiciously assumed that she was lying to avoid sharing what had terrorized her so—and against his instinct to not let her get away with being dishonest, he had let it rest, affording her leniency on account of his own experiences with nightmares and how vulnerable they could make one feel. 

Only, it kept happening. Five times in the not quite four weeks they had been sleeping in the same bed, Lamees had woken him, either by fighting some invisible force or, worse, by puling as if her fear was weighing too heavily on her chest to let more than the weakest sound escape. Twice more, after waking her, then having sex with her, had Hux inquired about what Lala remembered of her dreams. And both times, she had seemed surprised and puzzled by his interest. Being more familiar with her by then, with her inability to hide her feelings, he had realized that Lamees really did have no recollection, no memory of her nightmares. Or even that she had suffered them. So he had stopped asking.

The worst about this was that, thinking back, he wasn't completely sure that it hadn't also happened in the beginning. That he had just not known Lala well enough to realize what she was going through. That he—despite being aware that her pheromones were mostly provoked by fear—had been too overwhelmed by what they had woken in him to spare a thought about why. He had simply assumed that it had been the uncertainty of her situation, the stress from nearly starving herself to death, maybe even fear of him. And perhaps it had been, because he didn't remember her whimpering like she did when she was trapped in her terrors. 

Stars, he hoped so. What he had done to Lamees those first two nights was bad enough. He didn't want to consider that it might all have started with nightmares he'd been too cock-driven to notice.

In his arms, Lala had not moved for quite a while, and Hux was sure she was now fast asleep. Part of him wanted nothing more than to sit here all night cycle and let the young woman rest, enjoying the soft weight of her petit form against his chest. But he would need his wits about him, come morning, for both their sakes. And so he gently freed himself from under her. Lala barely stirred. She really was a heavy sleeper this one, and not for the first time, Hux felt a pang of envy as he, not without some effort, lifted her off the bed and carefully placed her on the mattress next to it before covering her with a blanket. Then the girl sighed, turning onto her stomach and nestling into her pillow, and Hux allowed himself a few more moments to watch her, telling himself he was only making sure she had not truly woken up. 

Against the standard-issue, charcoal-colored sheets and accented by her vividly blue hair, her complexion looked truly pale. Not ashen and dull like his own, but with just enough of its pink hue left to give it a healthy glow. Perhaps, if he told her to color her hair black, she would pass as human after all? Then again, by now, it was probably well known that he had brought a non-human woman on board with him. Any attempt to hide it would only make it look as if he were embarrassed. And, he suddenly realized he was not. Not anymore. Whether it made her inferior or not, Lamees' species was nothing she had chosen, nothing she was responsible for, and so, he felt, nothing she—or he—should feel obligated to obscure. 

As if Pryde's words had driven home how little such petty distinctions really mattered. 

Tearing himself away from the sleeping woman, Hux straightened, then went into the small refresher to shower and change. After he had gone to bed, he checked on the small form lying on the mattress one more time before turning off the lights to try and sleep. 

But without Lala's body pressed against his, he was already feeling cold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, yeah, I know Hux is a bit too fluffy there at the end, and I promise he won't stay that way. Truth be told, this whole chapter feels like a mess to me and is first in line for a rewrite as soon as I get my head back on straight. >_< But I didn't want to keep you guys waiting any longer. 
> 
> The idea of the twin-sized bed comes from _Star Wars: The Last Jedi™: The Visual Dictionary_ by Pablo Hidalgo, where Kylo Ren's bed is shown to be rather narrow. When I showed the pic below to Molly, her reaction ("And Jesus wept, who could possibly get a good night sleep in that bed?!") stuck in my mind. Also, when I asked myself if Pryde would be petty enough to do that to Hux (and Lala), I realized, even if he wouldn't be, Ren definitely would. So ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
>   
> Images taken from _Star Wars: The Last Jedi™: The Visual Dictionary_ and protected by 'fair use'.


	38. Unknown (E)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux is utterly frustrated and lets it out on Lamees. (Skippable BDSM chapter)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rated for dubious-consent to light BDSM play (and sex, obviously). There's very little plot in this chapter, so if a bit of belting isn't your thing, (or if you're an emotional, pregnant person ^_^ ❤︎) feel free to skip. Fallout will be dealt with in the next chapter. ~_^
> 
> Thanks to CariSilver for being my encouragement and my beta ❤︎

I had known things would be different on the _Steadfast_. But how different didn't dawn on me until three days later.

Some small things had changed from the start, of course: Hux rose as early as ever, but he came home much later. The fact that we weren't sleeping in the same bed meant we both had to get used to not feeling each other's warmth, and Hux couldn't control the environmentals the way he'd been able to on the _Finalizer_. At least, that was what I suspected because, when I timidly asked him one night if he could set the temperature a little higher, he curtly advised me to put on warmer clothes. Which I did, meaning I now spent my days wearing a thermo-shirt and -pants, the same as Hux wore at night. Like the ones which had made me feel so exposed around the General right in the beginning. They were warmer… but their tight fit did not have the effect I had feared back then: for three days, Hux barely touched me.

That was the biggest change of all.

It wasn't as if I couldn't feel the occasional onset of lust in him. But whenever I tried to approach him, I was rebuffed, his rejections growing in both force and meanness. Reasoning that this was brought on by stress and long work hours, I tried to console myself with the hope that, once things had settled a bit, we'd have more time with each other again, and things would become more as they had been. What I didn't realize was that Hux was likely avoiding having sex with me in an effort to protect me from the darker desires growing within him, nourished by stress and frustration.

So, when on the third day, Hux came back to our quarters early enough to arrive before my evening meal, my first reaction was gratitude. Even when he approached me without a word, and despite the angry frustration I could feel in him, I failed to grasp the seriousness of the situation. Welcomed it even, when he took hold of me, walking me backward until I hit a wall, his hand fisting in my hair and holding me in place as he kissed me hungrily. Eager to please, I sucked his probing tongue into my mouth and moaned, clutching his shoulders to pull him closer.

His hands on me were definitely harsher and more demanding than usual as they pulled my shirt off so hastily, I was surprised the fabric didn't tear. A small voice in my head warned me about the urgency inside him—especially when I tried to unfasten his jacket and Hux harshly pulled my hands away—but I was too starved for physical contact to listen. I didn't mind a bit of rough play, and men getting carried away in the throws of my pheromones was something I was used to, after all. A few marks here and there would be a small price to pay for the gratification I knew I could give Hux. Or so I told myself.

I just didn't want to do it while he was wearing that fucking uniform.

"Hux, wait! Please…" I whispered, almost begged, and even though he pressed out a breath, and I could feel the effort it took, Hux stilled.

"It's not that I don't want to have sex with you," I said in my most submissive, I 'm-not-trying-to-fight-you voice. "I just…want to feel more of you? So, let me take this off? Please?" While voicing what I wanted in the most promising way I could think of, I had tried to reach for the fastenings of his jacket again. And again, he stopped me, this time by grasping my wrists with a lot more force than was necessary.

For a second, I could feel something in his mind, a small whisper of compassion, speaking up and raising objections in my favor. But it was quickly overruled.

"No."

The finality in his voice caused a chill to run through me, and I was almost too tense now to properly respond as he kissed me, his hand under my jaw angling up my head to make it easier for him to press his tongue deep into my mouth. When the General pulled back enough for me to look up at him, I did so wide-eyed, wondering what would be in store for me. His gaze was guarded, pensive, focused on my lips as he was thinking, and the shadows under his eyes contrasted sharply with the clear color of his irises.

"Turn around."

He only just gave me enough room to do so, his hands guiding me before he'd even pressed out the command. I felt my heart pounding in my chest and his breath ghost over my skin as he brushed my hair out of the way so he could trace his fingers along my hairline. I shivered and, bracing my hands in front of me, pressed back toward the body trapping me against the wall. I wanted to feel his arousal against my back, wanted him to know—or maybe to convince myself—that I wasn't scared of him. But then his hand grasped the back of my neck, hard, and I froze, suddenly not so sure.

"Stay," he said, and his voice was rasping slightly. I knew the emotion pouring out from him, I just didn't have a word for it: It was a dark desire, an urge to hurt, to cause pain, and I swallowed thickly, my mouth suddenly dry.

Did I trust him not to actually harm me? Should I try to distract him? Should I beg? Would he even listen? Thoughts like these chased each other through my head, but in essence, they were all useless: Never in my life had I been able to stop someone who had truly wanted to hurt me, so I wouldn't be able to now, either.

And, stupidly, the pheromones my body began to produce at this realization would, once again, make my predicament so much worse.

For now, all Hux did was stroke his hands firmly over my naked back, from my shoulder blades down to my hips. Yet, I could still feel the urgency in him and knew that this outward calm resulted from him having made up his mind about what he would do to me, not an attempt to hold himself back.

Just when I thought I had gathered enough courage to speak again, Hux beat me to it.

"Hold still, Lala," he said, and the outward calm in his voice made me shudder. "What I'm about to do will hurt. But you won't be injured—as long as you don't move. Nod, so I know you understand." And I did. The fact that he had taken a moment to reassure me and said 'Lala' instead of 'Lamees' had soothed me some. Not much. But a tiny bit.

"Good." His voice was husky and very, very close. I heard him breathe deeply as he leaned over me, his hands covering mine where they were braced against the wall. Then he moved them a little lower, from the height of my face to about the height of my shoulders. "Leave them there."

As Hux took a step back, his grip moved to my hips, pulling them along with him until only my hands were left resting against the wall. If they hadn't been pressed against the metal, I was sure they would have shaken with nerves. Then he dragged my pants and basics over my hips and down my legs, the soft fabric gliding over my skin like water. He made me step out of them and pushed them aside, gliding his fingers over the back of my thighs as he straightened back up, and I shivered.

I felt horribly exposed—which wasn't rational, seeing that Hux and I had been having sex for several weeks. Maybe it was the not insignificant amount of fear mixed in with all this. His lust was pressing into my mind with an almost unbearable force, and it wasn't all lust for sex, so I was scared.

When I heard his belt unclip, I let out a soft whimper. This was too much. I knew I wouldn't be able to just stand there and hold still if he beat me with leather. I had been through it before, and remembering that pain made me feel ready to break and beg, or curl up on the floor, or try and get away. Whenever Taka had beaten me, it had been as a punishment, methodical and cruel, and I had known why and that, once it was over, I'd be ok. Never had he used a belt on me for his pleasure sexual gratification—or as stress-release, as it seemed to be the way with Hux.

All these thoughts were racing through my head, so I had no time left to prepare, nor plead, before the first stroke hit me, high on my backside. I hissed out a breath. But once the first shock was gone, I realized that the pain had not been as bad as I had expected. It stung, but as I took another breath, the sting began to fade into a tingling warmth. Then the next blow hit, a little lower, and it was much the same. The sound of the impact jolted me more than the ache it caused.

There was a prolonged pause between strikes, too, which allowed for the pain to fade a bit before each new whack and gave me time to catch my breath. I wasn't sure if that was _why_ Hux was doing it that way, only that he seemed content to take his time. Perhaps he needed a moment after each swing to reign himself in.

I quickly lost count of the individual strokes as fog began to fill my head, and my thoughts drifted away, making room for Hux's emotions to push in. He had become strangely calm, focused, I thought, on his task of raining blow after blow on my ass, my back, my thighs, everywhere his belt could comfortably reach. After a while, the hits picked up in pace, all somehow bleeding into one sensation. It still hurt whenever the leather collided with my skin, but as my duress was overwhelmed by endorphins flooding my blood, I stopped flinching each time and just allowed myself to be caught up in the rhythm of it all.

By the time the General relented, I was a sweaty, foggy mess. I was so far gone that it took me a moment to realize the blows had stopped, and by then, Hux had stepped up close behind me, so close I could hear his labored breathing. As I felt the fabric of his clothes brush lightly against my over-sensitized thighs, I was reminded that he was still wearing his fucking uniform, and the thought made me shiver and air leave my lungs in a rush.

His hands began to stroke over my back, gently at first, his thumbs caressing the glowing skin of my ass and lower back so lightly it tickled, causing yet another chill to race up my spine. When his touch grew firmer, fingers pressing into the muscles, I moaned in pleasure, almost collapsing against the wall. Then his hand sneaked forward and between my legs.

I hadn't even noticed it myself—my body felt hot and tingling everywhere—but when he brushed against my lower lips, I realized that they were swollen and wet. And as his hand rubbed against my clit, that cluster of nerves suddenly became the center of my being. My fingers curled, nails scraping against metal, as this short touch nearly sent me over the edge. If I hadn't been so busy fighting my rising orgasm to draw this out, I would have been surprised at how fucking turned on I was.

"You can come if you want. But I'll fuck you, hard, anyway." Hux's voice rasped into my ear smugly, and, sweet stars, it was almost too much. Forcing my eyes open, I tried to calm my racing blood by drawing a deep breath, squirming, as the pressure on my clit intensified.

"No?" He sounded amused, but I could feel he was also pleased by my struggle to hold back. I didn't really trust my voice not to croak, so all I did was shake my head.

Deviously, Hux snuck two fingers inside me, curving them around my pubic bone and pressing into that spongy part of my font wall, trapping my clit under his palm.

"Fuck," I pressed out between clenched teeth. Automatically, my hips pushed forward into his hand before I managed to get my shuddering body under control enough to push my ass against Hux instead. The fabric of his uniform felt rough against my inflamed skin, and underneath he was painfully hard.

A huffed-out breath and a hand suddenly clamping down on my hip told me that I had managed to get to him, too. Only a little push now…

"Please," I whispered, "I want to feel your cock stretching me while I come."

Yeah, that did it.

His fingers disappeared, and I vaguely heard him fumble with the fastening of his trousers. Then, to my surprise, instead of just taking me from behind, Hux roughly turned me around, grabbed my ass, and, with a little grunt, lifted me up and pinned me against the wall.

The metal was cool on my flushed back, but I only noticed that for a second, before Hux's cock slid into me effortlessly, and my body seemed to forget that anything but my cunt existed.

Somehow, I had enough brainpower left to lock my legs around his waist and hold onto his shoulders as he began to move his hips, his face buried in my neck. His body was pinning me against the wall, so I had no room to move. But giving myself over to him—letting him choose a pace and rhythm to his liking—had its own appeal. And at this moment I reveled in it.

Then I let go.

I didn't think I had ever come this fast or this hard from being fucked against a wall, but my toes curled, and my fingers fisted into Hux's jacket as a tingling like a thousand tiny needles raced through my limbs and pleasure exploded in my core. Hips kept snapping against me, forcing his cock past my spasming muscles as my swollen cunt pulsed around him, and just when I wished Hux would ease off for a moment so I could have a little time to recover, a groan rose from his chest. As my muscles relaxed, I sank down on him a little further, and a deep, sweet twinge accompanied the few more shoves it took before his cock released a wave of liquid heat inside me.

Catching his breath, Hux kept me trapped between his body and the wall for a moment longer, and I treasured every second of it. I knew that it was only because our position made it necessary…but he hadn't held me this closely since our arrival on this cursed ship. And the feeling of him pressing against me, my arms and legs wrapped tightly around him, was all I wanted to allow into my thoughts as I basked in the after-glow of a mind-blowing orgasm.

All too soon, though, the moment passed. I sensed Hux pulling himself together, erecting that mental barrier he often threw up when he felt vulnerable, or like he lost control for an instant too long, before he shifted his grip on me to gently let me down. There was a rush of moisture between my legs as he slid out of me that would have made me grin if I hadn't felt the sting of having to let go so keenly. I tried to convince myself that I was overreacting, to rationalize that I only felt this way because the endorphins that had flooded my body a minute ago were receding, not because Hux was about to push me away. But I should have known better.

"Go," Hux ordered. "Clean up."

It was the dismissal I should have known was coming.

I wanted _so much_ to ask if he'd come and join me. But I had already realized that my longing for closeness was the exact opposite of what he was feeling. And so, as he turned his back on me, I picked up my clothes—not out of modestly, but because I knew it would annoy Hux if I didn't—and fled into the tiny 'fresher.

As I stood under the shower, the water on my face was soon joined by silent tears. At first, I kept trying to reason with myself to stay calm, but eventually, I gave up and allowed my body to cry itself out. And even after my sobs had run their course, I stayed under the hot spray for a lot longer than I usually would have dared…out of spite and perhaps secretly hoping Hux would join me after all—even if it was just to scold me for taking too long.

But he didn't. And when I finally emerged, I realized that he had left our quarters altogether.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I first wrote this, back in July 2020, it was a completely different chapter. The belting and the sex were there, but Lala was the more active, kind of guiding Hux into a way to find sexual gratification and release some frustration at the same time. And my beta sent it back, barely edited and, at my insistence, finally admitted that she hated it. That had never happened before and it bothered me a lot more than I had expected. <_> But, after sitting down with a bottle of wine and talking about a hundred other things, we got back to this chapter and why it didn't work for her—the feeling of too much reality and not enough BDMS fantasy, or, in simpler terms, Lala being scared instead of in control being the bigger turn on—and I realized that I could relate to what she was saying. So, I put on [_The Unknown_ by Bonnyie x Clyde,](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zivkNfEOy24) rewrote the whole thing and here it is. Hope you enjoyed. ^_^ 
> 
> (Lala is so lucky that Hux's belt is quite wide and therefore hurts a lot less than a thin one would—at least that's my experience ;) )
> 
> Oh, also: **Aftercare is super important and Hux is being an ass.** Don't be like Hux, please. ◔__◔


	39. Tension

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux tries to teach Lamees a lesson. Instead, she gets herself into trouble when she accidentally hits a sore spot.

Two weeks passed.

Two torturous weeks, during which the tension between Hux and me threatened to become unbearable.

I didn't have much to occupy myself with because, while I had been given another datapad, this one had even less access to anything besides dull regulation protocols. A fact Hux admitted to being aware of when I asked him about it but seemed unwilling—or unable—to change. Our one-room cabin didn't have a couch, just two hard, unmovable benches around an also unmovable table, all made of some slick metal or some kind of hard polymer. So, the only space of any comfort was the mattress beside Hux's bed, which I slept on. And even though I had built myself a small nest there, staying in the same spot all day, every day, completely alone, was somehow much worse for me than it had been on the _Finalizer_.

At least back then, Hux had come in in time to share a meal with me nearly every day, and we had had a few hours every night to be in each other's company. Now, he routinely came in so late and left so early that I could count myself lucky when I got eight hours with him.

And lucky was relative because, where there used to be a comfortable sociability between us, spiced up with really, really good sex, it was now all short tempers brought on by our, admittedly very different and yet very taxing, circumstances: I was being starved of sentient interaction, worse for me than being starved of food. And Hux was overwhelmed by work, not to mention the toll it took on his ego that, after so many years of fighting to get to where he had been, he was now no longer in command. Which meant our fundamental needs were so much at odds with each other that it was a wonder we managed to keep things between us from escalating.

There were days when I managed to accommodate Hux's need for peace, and there were days when I could tell he was making an effort to give me at least a bit of closeness and conversation. Very occasionally, we even managed to both be in an amicable mood at the same time, and for a few, calm hours it would feel like we'd be all right. But then there were the days when neither of us had any patience for what the other might want or need, and those grew alarmingly in frequency.

More than once did we end up snapping at each other over things that didn't really matter, and each time it was Hux who ended our arguments by shocking me with the collar, causing me to sullenly retreat into my little corner and do my best to ignore him.

And for the first time in my life, I was confronted with a man who was too worried about hurting me to allow himself to touch me. Which should have been reassuring and something to be grateful for, only without the connection Hux and I had formed through physical intimacy, and with Hux too drained for conversation, I had nothing left. Deep down, I suspected I could have tried harder, be more amicable, more patient when he was there if only I hadn't been so frustrated by being cooped up alone all day… In the end, I tried my best to stay out of his way, even though more nights than not, I quietly cried myself to sleep, something Hux either didn't notice or simply chose to ignore.

Then Hux made a suggestion to me that ended up changing everything.

———

Our bodies were entwined and thoroughly drenched in sweat. I could feel Hux's breath against the back of my neck, notably slower than mine, as I tried one more time to find a way to slip from his grasp. Instead, he moved his hip, and I groaned.

"I don't think that's supposed to bend that way," I pressed out through gritted teeth, but he had no mercy on me.

"You know what you're supposed to do," he said smugly before he applied just a little more pressure and made my vision go fuzzy with pain.

"All right, I yield! I yield!" I cried out, slapping the flat of my hand against his thigh twice, and he let me go, just when it felt like my shoulder was about to snap. I took a few steps forward, bare feet slightly unsteady on the sparring room's padded floor, and fought the urge to massage my aching joint.

"Again," came Hux's voice before I even had time to turn around. I took a deep breath, turned, and rushed him. It was a stupid, impulsive move, but I hadn't tried it before, so…

My body collided with his chest, and I felt a wave of triumph as the air left him in a rush. Then the resistance I was bracing against fell away as he twisted, and when I tried to regain my balance, my foot caught on something. There was a shove in my back, and the floor came flying toward me.

"Uff"

"Really?" His question sounded more condescending than amused. "How did I avoid that?"

I grunted and pushed onto my hands and knees, trying to gather myself and my shredded dignity off the floor and only half succeeding. "By being fast like a freak?"

"No," he said, his voice even, but I could feel a hint of satisfaction coming off of him. "It's because you lack self-control. Patience. I could tell you were going to rush at me the instant you turned around. It was all over your face. Come here."

I straightened up and stepped towards him. For about an hour, I had tried to get the better of him, as he had ordered me to. But each time, he had either deflected me, like just now, or, worse, caught me in one of his devilish holds, with my joins bend at various, painful angles, so I couldn't move and had to signal my defeat the way he had taught me. What had started as a proposition that absolutely thrilled me—get some exercise, spend time with Hux's and out of our now tinny cabin, maybe even learn a trick or two—had quickly turned into a demonstration of Hux's physical superiority.

"You keep coming at me, knowing that I know you will," he said, facing me in his typical military stance, which somehow made him seem straight and relaxed at the same time.

"You told me to!" I shot back, prity annoyed.

"You always do what you're told?" Hux asked, and I didn't deign to reply, except for blowing a stray lock of hair out of my eyes. His face didn't betray his amusement as he continued. "This is not a game. If you do what your opponent expects," he took my hand and placed it on his shoulder, "you will lose."

His other hand took hold of my wrist and tugged, twisting my arm, the motion fluid but controlled, and I understood: He was demonstrating the way he had maneuvered me into a hold just moments ago. Only slowly enough for me to follow and understand the mechanics of it this time.

"If you let your emotions, your impatience, take control," he had me pressed against him again, my back against his chest, my arm trapped in his grip. But I didn't struggle, and he didn't pull, so it wasn't painful, "you lose. If you can't read your opponent quicker than they you," he let go, and I turned back around, then he placed his hand on my shoulder, "you lose. Now you."

Measured and carefully, I took hold of his wrist and repeated the motion he'd shown me. I was a little suspicious that he wasn't just baiting me into an opportunity for him to overpower me again. Instead, he went with it, turning slowly and making it easy for me to concentrate on the mechanics behind it all. As soon as I had his arm behind his back and supposedly trapped, I realized my grip on Hux wasn't nearly as neat and secure as his grip had been on me: When he had held me, he had braced his free arm against the nape of my neck and a moment ago had used it to force me to bend forward at the hip as I struggled. But vice versa, the difference in our hight made that quite a bit more challenging for me.

So, more out of spite than anything, I tried to hook my foot around his leg to pull him off balance. Only, that maneuver took my focus away from his arm, and, within the blink of an eye, Hux had twisted, and I found myself, once again, on the floor with the air pushed out of my lungs. I wasn't even sure how he had done it this time, it had happened so fast. I had also managed to knock my head— _ouch_ —so I stayed where I was while I tried to get my breath back.

"And what was that supposed to be?" Hux looked down at me with thinly veiled derision.

I pushed myself up on my elbows and shrugged. "Winging it?"

Hux made a noise somewhere between annoyance and exasperation as he crouched down gracefully, bringing us almost to eye level.

"You're not on Gorat's sheltered base anymore, Lala," he said. "If you don't learn to control your impulses and pick a fight with the wrong person—"

"Let me guess… I lose?" I interrupted spitefully.

"No. You die."

It was obvious he wasn't joking, nor being dramatic. He saw it as fact.

I blinked.

"Is that why you let Pryde treat you the way he does?" I dared to ask, after a moment of looking into his eyes. And the way he studied me, cooly but calmly, let me hope I had gotten lucky. 

"I have known Pryde for decades," he said thoughtfully. "And if I had as little self-control in dealing with him, as you do in dealing with, well, anything, I would have been dead hours after Ren ordered me onto this ship."

"Decades?" I asked.

"Yes, he was a friend of my father." There was a second of hesitation before Hux added, "And his wife." 

_Oh shit_ , I thought. Almost said it, too, but Hux wasn't done. "There is other… history between us." There was a sadness in his tone, in him, that had me so curious, I threw caution to the wind.

"Like the woman Pryde mentioned? Jocasta?" I asked softly.

I was aware of the risk it was to bring her up, but Hux's forceful reaction made me feel just as breathless as my impact on the floor had a second ago: From one moment to the next, his face grew blank, and his eyes grew cold.

But his emotions… This was worse than anything I had felt from him since we got here, and that was really saying something. Before I could bring myself to whisper that I was sorry, Hux put his hand around my throat. I expected him to squeeze, but instead, his thumb gently stroked over my skin as his eyes dropped to my collar. My eyes were probably wide as saucers as I stared at him in fear, scared of what he might do.

"Never," he said in a surprisingly even voice, "mention that name to me again." I nodded, a bit frantic, but it wasn't enough for him, and for a moment, he bared his teeth at me. "No, Lamees, I want to hear you say it. Say, 'I will never mention her name again'."

My throat felt too tight to force words through, but I managed to rasp out a hurried whisper. "I will never mention her name again, Hux. I promise." He took a deep breath and, with a jolt, I realized that my terror of him must have been affecting him, too.

_Fuck._

Yeah, I could feel it in him, that dark swirl of lust setting in and, when his eyes strayed from my throat down to my breasts, I wasn't at all sure I would get away as easily as I had on Arkanis this time. For fuck's sake, I wasn't even sure I wanted to—it had been two weeks since Hux had last touched me in a sexual way, after all, and just for a moment—a tiny moment—I was torn between finding that dark stir a turn-on and finding it just plain scary.

Then, quite suddenly, Hux stood up, releasing my neck and turning his back to me. "Get out."

It took me a second longer to get my body to comply than I would have liked, but once I, too, was on my feet, I didn't waste any time to flee from the room. I only just remembered to grab my shoes before I rushed through the door, leaving Hux behind.


	40. Trapped

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trying to get back to her quarters, Lala runs into the Knights of Ren. And without orders holding them back, they get nasty. (Warning for violence and assault, including sexual assault.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lamees just can't catch a break. The first part of this chapter is comparatively light-hearted, maybe even a little silly…but then it gets pretty fucking dark toward the end, so brace yourselves.

For one stomach-turning second, I felt lost. All the corridors looked the same, so it was hard to get my bearings. Especially since my racing heart and my pumping blood urged me to keep moving, drowning out the whispered warnings of my brain that I should make sure I was heading the right way, first. As my desire to put distance between Hux and me won over my caution, I simply picked a direction and went with it, planing to stop and think once I was around the next corner. 

Getting there took a while, and when I finally reached the end of one corridor and turned into the next, I started to hear voices. Sure enough, as I moved further along, I could make out a second corridor joining mine in a t-juncture leading towards the turbolift I had been looking for. Unfortunately, right in front of said lift stood a pair of soldiers, both dressed in the anonymous white armor of stormtroopers. Ready to turn around and try my luck elsewhere, I halted as one of the voices mentioned Hux's name. 

So, I knew the General had warned me about staying out of sight. But maybe waiting for the two stormtroopers to disappear into a lift and take the next one was the better option? I crept closer, thankful for my soft slippers, which made it easy to move in silence, and told myself that I wasn't, in fact, eavesdropping. Listening to their conversation was just an innocent byproduct of my wanting to get as close to the lift as possible.

"He never lets her out, that's for sure," the soldier on the left said, and for a moment, I was confused and thought they might have changed the topic. Then the one on the right said, "Maybe he keeps her chained to his bed," with a snort of amusement in his voice, and I realized with a start that the stormtroopers were talking about me. 

"I know someone in requisitions, swears that Hux put in a request for a female officer's uniform a few days ago," Left gossiped, and now I was the one who almost snorted in amusement. 

"You think that was for her?" 

"Maybe. Some say he's besotted, others that he's taking out his frustrations on her, and that's a miracle she's still alive."

I shivered. Sure, Hux hadn't been a joy to be around lately. But did either of these two really believe he'd just kill me? I never found out.

"Personally," Right continued, "I'm waiting for Hux to dye her hair blond." 

"Never… I saw her when Hux brought her on board, and that would look horrible with her skin tone."

"Yeah, but Hux used to have a thing for Pryde's daughter—what's her name? Jocasta?" 

There was the hiss of a door. I should have felt relief that the lift had come to take these two away, as it would bring me one step closer to making it back to our quarters safely. Instead, I really wanted them to stay, so I could keep listening to their conversation.

"Are you serious?" Left asked. "And now he's here, flaunting his sex-slave about? In front of Pryde?" 

Ringing footsteps told me that the two soldiers were moving into the lift, and I only just so made out Right's response before the door hissed closed: "Only he doesn't, does he?"

Once sure they were gone, I stepped up to the doors and activated the controls. Over the last few weeks, I had occasionally thought about the name Pryde had mentioned to Hux, as well as the strong reaction it had provoked in the General. Yet, for some reason, I had pictured the woman in question to be of Pryde's age, not Hux's. And after what Hux had just told me in the sparring room when he mentioned the connection between Pryde and his father, that impression had deepened. 

But now I understood that I had been missing something obvious. True, Hux hadn't exactly felt love-sick to me when we first met. But it always took me a while to get used to new people before I got good at sensing and interpreting their emotions. And Hux had proven one of the most closed-up men I had ever spent time around…even after a month and a half of seeing him every day, the General could still be devilishly hard to read. Plus, I had no idea how long ago whatever had happened between the two had happened, nor for how long it went on. It did bring back memories of our earliest days, though, about the guilt and reluctance I had occasionally felt in Hux's emotions during or right after we'd been intimate in some way. 

I wondered if I should feel jealous. Or worried. Hux's behavior back when we came on board and the way he had just now ordered me out of his sight made it clear that there were still strong emotions at work when it came to this Jocasta. What if, through some twist of fate, circumstances would change and there would be another chance for Hux to pursue her? Would he just…let me go? Would I be free?

Or would the General remember the offers which had been made for me and decide to sell me, after all?

So caught up in my thoughts was I that the hiss of the door made me jump. But that was nothing compared to the cold terror that gripped me as I saw the two black figures standing in the lift. Before my muscles registered that my brain was screaming at them to move, a gloved hand had closed around my throat and, with a surprisingly painful yank, lifted me right off my feet.

Instinctively, I grabbed the arm that was holding me as the man it belonged to stepped out of the lift and chuckled. My feet kicked uselessly at empty air, and blood was rushing loudly in my ears, but somehow I could still make out a vaguely familiar voice, muffled by a mask.

"Will you look at this! Hux's little slut, scurrying about unsupervised."

When he released me, I stumbled back, coughing, but somehow managed to stay on my feet.  
It was two of Ren's so-called Knights, and I recognized them both: The one in the back, wearing a skull-shaped mask and oilcloth over his armor, was the one who had come to fetch me for Ren on Arkanis. And the other, wearing a helmet with heavy-looking, tube-like attachments…he was the one who had studied my bruises and asked me if I begged people to stop when they were hurting me. The one Ren had threatened to 'feed' me to if I tried to lie to him. Ushar.

"Why are you out of your cage, little mouse?" Ushar asked as he unslung a wicked looking weapon from his back, some kind of staff or club, which he swung lightly back and forth in his hand while closing the distance between us. "Trying to run away? Because you know what happens to slaves that try to run from their masters, don't you?"

"No, please! I swear I wasn't—" That was as far as I got before the Knight swung his staff. The heavy end caught me in the stomach with enough force to throw me back against the wall. Unable to control my body, I sunk down, folding in on myself, and thought for a moment that I'd be sick from sheer pain. There was bile at the back of my throat, but once I managed to suck a desperate gulp of air into my lungs, the urge to heave lessened. In a desperate attempt to protect my head, I threw up my arms, expecting further blows as the dark figure closed in on me. Only then…

"Ushar, stop!" The other man's voice rang strangely through his helmet. "Don't break her, yet. We'll take her to Ren first and see what he says."

"Why? What would he care about one stupid slut?"

"I don't know. But do you want to take that chance?"

"Hmm." As I finally dared to lower my arms and look, my gaze was met by a mask staring down at me, and I could feel Ushar's indecision. A strong appetite for causing pain was struggling against apprehension, maybe even fear, which, lucky for me, won over his sadistic lust. 

"Move along then, mouse," he said. "We'll play later." Then he nudged me with his staff to make me get up, and, still wheezing, I did.

My chances of Ren treating me any better than Ushar were slim, I knew. But contrary to his Knights, the Supreme Leader had at least never felt any kind of lust when he had hurt me. Maybe, just maybe, there was a chance I could convince him to return me to Hux, since he thought me the General's property, and that would be my way out of this situation.

The Knights led me back all the way to the sparring room I had come from. But before I could even feel hope at the idea that Hux might still be in there, we moved past, a bit further down the corridor, and through a different door. The room we entered was clearly meant for training, too, but much larger than the one Hux and I had used, with white walls, a high ceiling, and lights so bright they made me squint. Directly in front of us were Supreme Leader Ren and two men, all dressed in light, black workout-clothes, barefoot, and breathing heavily. The way they were facing each other made me think that we had interrupted them sparring, and as I looked around, I saw black armor, weapons, and helmets lying off to the side as if the Knights had carelessly shed their gear before starting their training. 

Even though he must have heard us enter, Ren remained focused and kept his back to us, looking like a predatory animal ready to pounce. But one of his opponents, a fit man with dark skin, dark eyes, and grey, curly hair, looked up, and something on his face must have given away his surprise at seeing me because now Ren relaxed and turned.

"Ap'lek, Ushar!" the second man with Ren called out. "What is this?" His skin was pale like Ren's, but he was older, slightly stockier in build, and his dark hair was turning white at his temples. He had a scar on his face too, a small one sitting just over his left eye, and what looked like a fresh bruise was forming on his cheek. 

"Hux's little slave," the man with the dark skin stated as fact, earning him a look from his sparring partner.

"And how would you know that, Vicrul?"

"She's a Zeltron, Cardo." There was bored patience in Vicrul's voice as if he were used to catching details faster than the other. "The only non-human on this ship." 

"The only living non-human, you mean."

"Living for now, at least," was added from behind me.

"What is she doing here?" Ren's voice was low, but at his question Vicrul, Cardo, and Ushar all fell silent, leaving Ap'lek to answer. 

"We found her down the corridor," the Knight explained. "She practically ran into us in her hurry to get into the turbolift. Ushar thought she was trying to escape and wanted to punish her for it, but I thought it wiser to see what you want done with her."

A wave of resentment in my back told me that Ushar, who was still standing closest to me, wasn't happy about Ap'lek sharing that last part. "I don't see the problem," he told Ren. "She was running, and we all know what is done with slaves that try to run."

I really wanted to explain, to defend myself…but trapped among these strange men, with their hate, cruelty, and lust for pain all pressing in on me, I couldn't think clearly, and my voice failed me. Luckily, Ren seemed to have guessed the truth already.

"No," he mused. "She wouldn't run from Hux. She's conditioned too well, and she knows there's no place she can go where he won't find her. He owns her." As I glanced up, I saw his gaze lingering on the thin, metal ring around my neck, and it reminded me of how adamantly Hux had insisted I keep wearing his collar to convince people I was still his slave. 

"Please, my Lord," I finally managed to speak, albeit barely above a whisper. "I didn't mean to cause any trouble." 

"Tell me what happened," Ren ordered.

"The General took me to the room next door to exercise. And when we were—when he was done, I mean—he told me to go back to his quarters."

"He sent you off alone?" 

"Yes, my Lord." I affirmed, and then, to drive the point home, added, "As I said…after he was done with me."

I hoped that my innuendo would deflect from the truth, and while a chuckle from Ushar and a grin passing over Cardo's face told me it had worked on those two, I couldn't be sure with Ap'lek behind his mask, nor Vicrul or Ren, as their faces both remained expressionless. 

A few long seconds ticked by as Ren studied me, and I got more and more afraid that he'd seen through my lie and would punish me for it, simply on principle. Then, suddenly, his focus shifted toward the door as if someone else had entered and, without even looking at me, he stepped away, waved at his Knights, and ordered, "Rough her up. But don't kill her, yet."

I barely had time to feel the blood in my veins turn to ice before Ushar shoved me forward, toward Cardo and Vicrul. Panicked, I turned, just in time to see him swinging his club at my chest. Instinct allowed me to spin out of the way and turn a crushing hit—which would surely have broken bone, had it landed properly—into a glancing blow. Clutching my side, now afire with pain, I saw both Ushar and Ap'lek advancing and tried to hobble out of their reach, only to realize a heartbeat too late that Cardo had snuck up on me from behind. This time, I was entirely too slow, and a kick hit my upper thigh, aimed so precisely that despite Cardo's bare feet, the agony and shock caused me to sink to my knees with a strangled yelp. But my cry was cut short when another kick landed on my lower back, whether from Cardo or Vicrul, I wasn't sure, because pain dimmed my vision. Terrified, I tried to curl into a ball to make myself as small a target as I could, only for a vicious blow to hit my ribs, its force throwing me on my side. 

Then they stopped.

The fog of fear and pain clouding my thoughts had prevented me from hearing the door, but a familiar voice cut through, and I sobbed in relief. 

"This is madness, even for you," Hux hissed, so low I could barely make out his words. But he was here, and hope grew in me that the worst was now over, giving me the strength to push through the pain and pull myself up enough to look. 

Hux and Ren were standing a few feet away, unnaturally close to each other, as if Hux had tried to get to me, only for Ren to block his path. A mechanical hiss drew my eyes to Ushar, who was taking off his helmet to reveal a face with shallow skin, dark hair, a short, scruffy beard, and a nose that look like it had been broken one too many times to heal straight. Then he mocked, "You shouldn't leave your toys out if you don't want others to play with them." 

"Call off you dogs," Hux said to Ren, ignoring the other Knight. "She has done nothing to deserve this."

"You're right. _She_ has done nothing. But Pryde ordered you to keep her out of sight," Ren pointed out. "Which makes everything about to happen to her your fault."

"We had a deal!" There was a desperate edge to Hux's voice I had never heard before.

"We did," the Supreme Leader agreed softly. "For her life."

"We can have plenty of fun without killing her," Ushar promised, eyeing me hungrily. But Ren's gaze never left Hux as he seemed to contemplate something before he spoke.

"Our deal was some time ago, Hux. By now, the _Finalizer_ has been reduced to scrap. The only choices you have left are to stay here and serve under Pryde or die. And since I don't expect you're willing to lay down your life for your pet's, perhaps it's time for me to rethink our arrangement." 

The two men stared at each other for a moment, Hux's expression full of hatred, Ren's eerily calm. Then Hux's gaze flicked to me, and as our eyes met, my desperate hope that he'd get me out of this clusterfuck flickered and died. His face a cold mask of resignation, the General turned his attention back to Ren, who gave a low, indifferent-sounding order.

"Have at her."

Each breath I took sent a step of pain through my chest, and my leg threatened to buckle as I put weight on it. Yet somehow, I managed to push back to my feet and slowly edge away from Ushar, who had begun to advance on me again. I hadn't forgotten about Vicrul nor Cardo in my back, but with the four spaced out evenly, it was impossible to keep them all in my sight at once. And they were obviously used to working as a team because, just as Ap'lek made a noise that sounded like cracking knuckles, Cardo lunged at me. Sheer, dumb luck had made me turn in time to see him move from the corner of my eye, and I managed to evade his grasp, only to feel a hand fasten around the nape of my neck as I stepped into Ushar's reach.

Shrieking in fright, I squirmed, but the man's grip was fast, and the room spun as he shook me, then pushed me forward with enough force to make me lose my footing. I stumbled and would have fallen if it hadn't been for Vicrul catching my arm and yanking me up so harshly, it felt like he was trying to separate it from my shoulder. I could smell sweat and drank wool as he pulled me against his chest. 

_Thinkthinkthink_ I thought, not very productively. Then, as I looked up into the black, staring eyes of the man holding me, rational thought left me entirely. It was as if my already overwhelming terror was multiplied, turning into a crushing force that swept all logic from my head. 

"Please," I whimpered. As a flood of amusement broke through Vicrul, my terror ebbed back to something that felt, if not bearable, then at least more natural, and suddenly it dawned on me that he'd used some insidious power to amplify my fear. 

"Please," I tried again as my mind finally managed to focus. "You don't have to hurt me anymore. I won't fight you." To emphasize my point, I laid my palms flat against Vicrul's chest, feeling hard muscle under the rough fabric of his shirt. There was arousal in him, in all of them, I could sense it, amplified, surely, by my pheromones, which must have been thick in the air by now. And, as I pressed my hips forward, I could feel the physical evidence of it begin to manifest as well. But Vicrul didn't act upon it immediately.

"Did you hear her, Ushar?" he asked instead, glancing over my shoulder with a hint of a smile playing along his full lips. "She won't fight us…"

There was a dark chuckle behind me before Ushar said, "Slow then," which meant nothing to my terrified mind. All I could think of was that Hux was still here and how much I wished I could forget about him watching. I knew my weakness would disgust him, and I felt deeply ashamed of my words and of my inability to defend myself in any other way than to offer my body up willingly. 

I also knew that, even if I survived what these four were planning to do, Hux would never look at me the same way after watching them fuck me. 

"How many of us do you think you can take at once?" Cardo asked, and Ushar grinned as he pointed out, "She only has three good holes." 

"If Hux had her earlier, her cunt's probably still wet." Cardo's voice again, just as Vicrul's hand fisted in my hair and pulled, making me whimper. "You can have that hole then," the Knight holding me said, using his grip at the nape of my neck to turn me toward the others, "since you like it the easy way." His free hand reached around and took hold of my breast, his fingers cruelly clawing into the soft flesh, his erection pressing into the small of my back. 

Gladly, I would have closed my eyes in humiliation and shut them all out, even as Cardo pulled off his shirt and stepped toward me. But it was Ushar who I couldn't look away from. He had discarded the club he had beaten me with earlier, and in its stead, a huge vibroblade was humming in his hand. "You take her ass, Cardo her cunt, and Ap'lek can have her mouth," he said, sadistic pleasure pressing into my mind from his. "And me, I'll just have to make a fourth hole for myself…"

"No, please…" I whimpered as Ushar pulled my shirt away from my stomach and began cutting slowly upward, the blade gliding through the fabric like it was air. Vicrul still held me flush against him in an iron grip, but I wouldn't have dared to move anyway. I knew that if the blade touched me, the vibration that made its edge quiver would cause it to split my skin open like an overripe jogan fruit. 

Then, not quite halfway done with his work, Ushar hesitated. He looked up, not at me, but over my shoulder at Vicrul, and I sensed a rush of confusion from all four Knights as they turned as one. As my gaze followed theirs, I saw Ren and Hux, the General standing unnaturally still and his face red as if he were straining against the Supreme Leader's outstretched hand. Only, the two weren't actually touching. It wasn't until Ren dropped his arm, causing Hux to sway and stagger, that I realized he must have been using some aspect of his sinister power to hold Hux in place. 

Before my mind could process any more than that, a ghostly figure flickered into life in front of Ren, and Pryde's voice filled the room as he explained something about an incoming transmission. Ren gave a curd answer, and the last thing I saw before Vicrul shoved me to the floor was the holo of Pryde flicker and die. The Knights began to move around me as if they instinctively knew what was expected of them without Ren having to utter a word. And as their menacing presence retreated, giving me space to breathe, terror was replaced by numbness. 

I had no idea how long it took them to gather their things, nor did I make out any of the words spoken between Ren and Hux before the Supreme Leader left, his Knights trailing after him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long. It had nothing to do with the chapter itself, apart from the fact that I had to rewrite it quite a bit. (In my original plan for this story, this was going to be the last chapter from Lala's pov, with only an epilogue to throw some light on Hux's mindset and to lead into the _The Rise of Skywalker_ plotline.) All chapters from now on, I need to write from scratch. So, sorry to say, but I doubt I'll be able to post them on time. :/ With a little luck, though, _Lamees_ will be done by the end of 2020, with maybe three or four chapters left to go.
> 
> Also, I just realized that December 18th will mark the six months anniversary of me posting the Prologue! xD I don't think I've spent six months work on any written medium since handing in my Magisterarbeit (which is kinda like a Master degree) <_<'


	41. Interlude 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A few days after the events of **Trapped** , Hux comes to a decision.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The editing of this chapter was done by the wonderful [Gtr4evr](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gtr4evr) who deserves a huge shoutout because this was her first time being my beta - and the first time for me to have a beta I couldn't bribe with a glass of wine - and who was incredibly patient and helpful with her suggestions. ❤︎

General Armitage Hux stared at the small datacube in front of him, lost in contemplation.

The choice before him was not an easy one. No matter how thoroughly planned out his actions were, how often he ran through different scenarios and their possible outcomes in his head, this course was dangerous. The information, secretly copied from the _Steadfast_ 's core and now saved on the cube, was vast—due to most of it still being encrypted for Hux's protection—and leaving the cube itself behind was far too risky. Which meant he would need several seconds of uninterrupted connection to transfer all of it into the designated terminal.

It would be difficult, but not impossible.

The perfect place for a drop had presented itself less than an hour ago when a routine checkup on a mining colony had revealed too many inconsistencies in their ledgers to be a coincidence. This would give the general an ideal pretext for an unscheduled inspection during which he could covertly transfer the data. True, there was no guarantee that the mine's overseer was delivering the stolen malsarr to the Resistance, which left a small chance that Hux's efforts might be wasted. But time was running out, and with less than a day left before the Resistance would be crushed, Hux had to take the risk and act now or lose his chance forever.

Yet, there was more than just the risk of discovery and subsequent death that weighed into his decision. If he were to go through with this and transfer the data, hoping it would find its way into the hands of the Resistance, he would be betraying everything he had spent his life building. And no matter how much Hux loathed Ren, how disgusted he had become with the man's vile actions and the Supreme Council's opportunistic members, this was not an easy decision for Hux to make.

But, if he wanted to rid himself of Ren, what choice did he have?

A mere four days ago, the Supreme Leader had made it plain that he no longer found Hux meaningful enough to keep around, and had it not been for the distraction caused by that ominous transmission, the general was sure he would be dead by now.

He and Lamees, both.

Likely, Ren would have killed the girl first, allowing his vicious pets to rip her apart and giving Hux time to agonize over his inability to protect her nor prevent his own impending doom. Then, as soon as that lost its savor, the Supreme Leader would have found some excuse to end Hux's life as well. The irony that it had been Ren's idiotic obsession with all things related to Jedi or Sith, which had afforded Hux more time to formulate a plan, was not lost on him. But if was of small comfort, as he recalled the moment Ren had returned from the deepest abyss of the Unknown Regions, stinking of sweat and blood, and brought back news of a gargantuan fleet. A fleet build and outfitted by none other than Sheev Palpatine, the Emperor himself, risen from the grave. Or so Ren claimed.

Hux had his doubts about that last part, and suspected other members of the Supreme Council did, too.

But sensor readings from Ren's TIE Whisper had confirmed the fleet's existence if nothing else, and Hux now knew two things beyond a doubt. One, he would not allow Ren to take control of this fleet, and two, the best way of achieving this without being terminated, was to get the information he had stolen to the Resistance. The data was encrypted in layers; the first part was easily decipherable, while other, more critical parts of it were spliced so thoroughly that decoding them without his personal key would take weeks.

This, Hux hoped, would allow him to broker an agreement with them for Lamees.

And him, were there no other choice.

The latter was an option he would reserve for nothing but the direst of circumstances, since it would mean the end of his dreams to one day rule the First Order and, through it, the galaxy. But it was an option, nonetheless.

If someone had suggested to Hux a year ago that he would ever consider such a path, he would have smirked, then thrown them into a termination chamber. Now all he could think of was Lamees, cowering on the padded floor of the sparring chamber and how seeing her among the four men had driven home what a small, fragile creature she was. That did not mean he had suddenly become sentimental. The situation had simply exposed Ren's barbarity, the chaotic nature of his personality, and, subsequently, what allowing him to stay in power would mean in the long term: The destruction of order.

The strong would always rule over the weak; Hux himself was no stranger to ruthlessness, and victory over an adversary was something to be savored. But to needlessly torture a helpless thing like Lamees for sport was vile. And if this was the way Ren and his like entertained themselves, it proved them mindless bullies without finesse or refinement, a trade befitting perhaps the lowest of pirates and outlaws, but not the Supreme Leader of the First Order.

In the beginning, Hux had hoped that the man's reckless and distracted nature would be his downfall. But nearly a year had gone by, and things had only gotten worse. Now that Ren had the opportunity to take over an entire fleet, vastly superior in numbers and firepower than what the First Order currently had at its disposal, the time to wait for the problem of Ren to resolve on its own was over.

Having to serve under a lesser man like Pryde had been bad enough, something Hux had endured because he had expected it to be temporary. But, four days ago, the feeling he had experienced in that sparring chamber had shock him awake. That blasted helplessness which he had had to suffer so often while growing up and which had thought he had rid himself of along with his father, only to now find himself at the mercy of another brute. That had to stop.

Again, his thoughts strayed to Lamees, who was currently resting in their quarters. And in his bed, for now, since the bruises mottling her ribs and leg were still too painful to make her sleep on the floor.

It had not been luck that Hux had interrupted the Knights when he had. After taking a few moments to rain in his anger at the girl for so impudently asking about Jocasta, he had returned to their quarters expecting Lamees to be there already. And when she had not been, his first reaction had been annoyance, not worry. The _Steadfast_ was a sizable ship, but still a ship, so she would have nowhere to run. In fact, Hux did not think she had run at all. Instead, she had likely gotten lost on her way back, which meant that, sooner or later, one of the units patrolling the corridors would pick her up and inform him of her whereabouts. Not really in the mood to wait for that to happen, Hux had donned his uniform jacket and fished the small remote from its pocket.

Just as he had once told Lamees on Arkanis, one reason he kept insisting on her wearing the collar was the tracking beacon built into it, which allowed him to pinpoint her location even across subspace. But he had not had to look that far this time: The girl had still been on the training deck.

Only, instead of the room they had trained in, where she might have returned on her own to avoid getting lost, the signal had placed her in Ren's private sparring chamber.

At that, his blood had run cold, and, for a heartbeat, Hux had weighed his options. But leaving Lala at Ren's mercy was not something he could bring himself to do, and so, against his better judgment, he had rushed to find her.

After Ren and his Knights had left for the bridge, Hux had wanted to take Lamees straight to sickbay. Yet when Lala had begged him in a tearful voice not to leave her among unfamiliar men and scores of droids, he had relented and taken her to their quarters instead. But only because he felt sure enough that the physical injuries she had suffered were not life-threatening. And because he could just about imagine the kind of rumors which would spread if he personally delivered her to medical in such a state.

Getting Lala off this ship was now his new priority. Hux had already allowed Ren to control him through her for far too long, and he had ordered the girl to use the time of her recuperation to study the _Steadfast_ 's layout and protocols. Hux had to admit that she had a good memory, so he was confident that she would soon be able to move around the ship without him if need be. To keep her presence in the corridors as inconspicuous as possible, he had commissioned a communications officer uniform for her a few weeks prior. Tailored to her measurements, the outfit would cover most of her skin while hiding her hair under the uniform's matching cap.

All this would help get her off the ship quickly, but that was only half the goal.

Once he had delivered the information on the cube before him to the Resistance, Hux estimated he would have the leverage he needed to convince them to help with the rest. That and their idealistic principals should be more than enough to motivate them to use their low cunning to keep Lamees safe. As chaotic and primitive as their methods might be, there was a certain tenaciousness at the root of their organization; methods which had made it hard enough for Ren, even with the First Order's full might at his disposal, to snuff them out. Making one woman disappear would be easy in comparison, at least until Hux's position was more secure. And as soon as that was done, he would use the locator build into Lamees' collar to find her and have her brought back to him.

To that end, Hux would stay behind, lest he should miss his chance to usurp power back from those who had stolen it from him, once the chaos he expected the Resistance to create was in full swing. Pryde would need taking care of, for one, and only if Hux stayed close enough to the Allegiant General would he be able to seize any arising opportunity to rid himself of the older man. And other members of the Supreme Council might be swayed if they felt the wind turn, but that was only in Hux's interest if he were there to steer them in the right direction. Hence, he would remain on the _Steadfast_ for as long as possible, while taking every available precaution to ensure his survival.

His comlink chimed, informing him that the shuttle being prepared to take the inspection team to the glacier colony was ready to depart. And Hux picked up the datacube and let it disappear into his pocket.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really wanted to show what I imagine Lala's collar to look like, so I fiddled around with a picture of myself wearing a collar from [etNox's](https://www.etnox.com/eng/) Story of O. Collection until my (bright purple) hair somewhat matched Lala's blue. ^_~


End file.
